[David Goldberg]

Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!

• This topic was modified 4 years, 8 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 years, 5 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.

Topic

[Logan DFD]

I’ve been working on my natural delivery. Which one of these takes sounds more natural?

Balducci’s

Can your food market pass a simple taste test?
At Balducci’s, we put taste first.
This spring, we’re loading up our stores with fresh and chef-crafted foods that are simply bursting with flavor.
Like majestic orange wild king salmon, flown in daily.
And specialties like champagne ham, slow-smoked over hickory chips and glazed with pineapple juice and brown sugar.
Now there’s a store that puts taste first.
Balducci’s.
The food lover’s market.

Thanks for listening!

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[Kent]

Just getting into commercial myself. Adding more oomph and emotion is challenging me. I can feel it trying to come out in your recordings. Maybe listen to “flown in daily” and see if that sounds a little bit as though it’s being read. As if it’s in parentheses. Not the way someone would speak.

Punctuation is a stumbling block for me. I read it and it can sound that way. Making it sound more conversational is the challenge. Picture telling someone about this. May not be the words you’d use, but kind of a looser flow. I think maybe lifting the ends of some of your words/sentences might help, but not everyone speaks that way and you don’t want to make it sound as thought you’re asking a question. But it can bring a little more spontaneous sound, I think.

I thought #2 was the best. Good work. Keep at it.

[twstark]

A couple more reads in the Commercial Genre. Thanks!

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[solin232]

Hi twstark, I love the tone of your voice and thought your pacing and diction on the Allstate Insurance read was very good, I didn’t notice anything negative on either read except the Viking River Cruise was cut off towards the end, nice job!

[Teacher2]

You are absolutely a natural!!

[MayeWest]

Very nice voice, diction and pace

[bnielsen15]

Hi again everyone! Some more narration homework here. As always, any feedback is greatly appreciated.
Thanks!

Save Them All:There is a lifesaving path forward. To the more than 4,100 dogs and cats killed every day in animal shelters, we’ve made a pledge: We will reach no-k**l in this country by 2025. Working collaboratively with shelters, other animal welfare organizations and you, together we can Save Them All. Join us, and help make history. Thank you for visiting our sanctuary.

One Vanderbuilt Observation Deck: Hello, and welcome to the audio simulation of the One Vanderbilt Observation Deck. Please adjust your audio volume to a level that best represents my voice at a normal speaking volume to a person standing next to you. This will calibrate your headphone level. Please do not adjust your audio volume again over the course of the simulation. Thank you.

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[Logan DFD]

Good Work! The Vanderbilt read had the right tone for what was intended. It sounded like you read the Save Them All read with the same tone, which didn’t quite fit as well. Parts of it were a little monotone, and other pieces that had pitch variety (the opposite of monotone) had similar rhythms. It can be hard to have good pitch variety, but try to read the script as if you were speaking it to someone in your everyday life.

Keep it up!

[Curtis R]

Hello, Im Curtis B. Rembert, and im looking for some feed back on practice reads. thanks for your time.

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[madtrammell]

Good work! My only comment would be on your second read to slow down your pacing just a tad to avoid sounding rushed

[Jaljr]

Hello all –

Here are some reads for my narration coaching sessions today. If you have time take a listen. All feedback appreciated. They are VERY lightly edited. Mainly focused on the read and not the finished product. Thanks

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[Cheechman]

I would say they sound really good, just more highlighting of the customer.

[Cheechman]

A different read from a different McDonalds post.

All comments are welcome

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[Cheechman]

Some reads from McDonalds posts online.

I liked 3 the best.

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[Logan DFD]

Hi everyone! I’m looking for some feedback on natural delivery and whether I have enough variety in pitch. Thanks for listening!

A1 Steak Sauce

With steak, you want to make every bite count.
That’s why we use A-1 Steak Sauce.
A-1 brings out every single bite of steak, or even hamburger.
Mmmmm, delicious.
For me, there’s only one steak sauce, A-1.
Because A-1 has all the taste that makes every bite count.

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[Tates-VO]

Hi Logan I felt like take 2 had a little bit more excitement

[Hazaro]

Hi Logan, I felt like the 2nd take had the most variety in pitch.

[Cheechman]

This an actual audition script read.

I’m torn between the 2nd and 3rd read.

What do you think?

This is the description:
This client helps the NHS, education and so on. It requires a confident, caring and mature voiceover. 60-second voiceover, 140 words. Guide track and film will be made available to shortlisted candidates.

Script to read: Notes: confident, calm, clear and proud.
We’re the goodies!
“We believe that good public services are the key to a stronger society.
We are The PSC, and we exist to make public services brilliant.”

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[madtrammell]

I think the third take is great!

[Hazaro]

I liked the 3rd take best but think you could slow it down a hair and give the words a bit more weight. 😉

[darleneharris]

Hi Everyone! Would love some feedback on the attached narration practice scripts in preparation for my next coaching session! Thank you!

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[Hazaro]

Great job on these! One tiny thing I would say (something I’ve done myself) is not to break up a word into syllables for the sake of clarity. It was only once in the first Brit-tain. Your clarity is already there and these both sounded great IMO!

[Author]

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