Feedback Forum

Homepage Forums Community Feedback Forum

  • Creator
    Topic
  • #15468
    Edge Studio
    Edge Studio Staff

    The Edge Studio Feedback Forum is the best place for you to post a recording and get feedback from the community! Record in your home studio, upload the file, and see what people think. This is a great place to get some advice on your technique, on your home studio, or to ask for people’s opinion on your reads. Remember, that this is a community forum, so please remain positive and encourage your peers in helpful ways. If Edge Studio feels that a user is too negative, or antagonizing other members of the community, they will have their posts deleted, and risk being banned from further communication. 

    Stay positive, listen to each other, and have fun!

Viewing 755 reply threads
  • Author
    Replies
  • #63978
    danvasq4030
    Participant

    Hey Feedback Forum!
    So these are my first recorded attempts at commercial type voice overs. And i’ve noticed that its quite a bit harder, for me at least, compared to narration work. But please any and all feedback/criticism is appreciated! I’ll also attach the scripts below for listeners to follow along!

    Acura RDX

    Great design challenges more than just the eyes. It challenges the future. We designed the RDX to challenge not just the future of SUVs, but also the future of Acura. The future starts now. The future is the Acura RDX.
    Acura. Everything we ever imagined. And then some.

    Mc Cholesterol

    Come to McCholesterol’s and try our Triple Bacon and cheese Heart Attack Burger and triple fat fries! This Friday, for only fifty cents, at McCholesterol’s.
    Eat like there’s no tomorrow…
    Death by fast food, why not? …
    Oh, is this thing still on? Oh yes, this Friday at McCholersteral’s…Eat like there’s no tomorrow

    Harvey Home Theatre

    He has a 160 IQ, performs cardiac surgery for a living. And now, he can even operate his home entertainment system. Introducing Harvey Home Theater. It’s so sophisticated, it’s simple. Dimensions of sight and sound unheard of, until now. All at your fingertips. Now, if he could only operate the microwave. Home Theater from Harvey, not your ordinary electronics store. Call for the Harvey near you.

    Attachments:
    You must be logged in to view attached files.
  • #63973
    artyom123
    Participant

    Would love an opinion on my emotional connection to text and feedback to improve. Thank you all, -Art

    What matters most in your life?
    What if there was a simple way to protect it all?
    Welcome to The Insurance Box.
    With The Insurance Box, finding the right life insurance for your specific needs has never been easier.
    That’s because we’re your insurance advocate. Our digital platform helps you find and customize the perfect life insurance solution from leading insurance providers…all at affordable prices.
    Our intuitive, easy-to-use online tools allow you to compare rates, calculate the right amount of coverage, and get a free quote within minutes. Of course, it’s all backed by our team of leading insurance experts standing by to answer any questions you have.

    Attachments:
    You must be logged in to view attached files.
  • #63962
    Hulykulani
    Participant

    Hello hello! Here I am for my final commercial coaching homework – 3 scripts as polished and refined as I could get them/hear them. To my ear I tried to record these with no glottal stops, no uptalk, no unnecessary pauses (only pausing at commas and periods), no words were under enunciated, and lastly I ensured that any list was varied within.
    Here are the scripts, let me know how I did, if I actually succeeded at producing 3 very polished reads or not!

    Intuition – Introducing Intuition. The only all-in-one razor that lathers and shaves in one easy step. You’ll never need shave gel, soap or body wash again, because Intuition’s triple blades are surrounded by a unique Skin Conditioning Solid. With just water, it smooths and soothes to give you soft, smooth, touchable skin with every shave. Shaving’s never been so simple.

    Crayola Markers – Crayola Color Wonder Markers color only on special paper. So, your kids can express their creativity more often…in more places…with less mess. Crayola Color Wonder. It starts with Crayola.

    New York Life – Peace of mind is waiting to meet you all across the country. In towns big and small, there’s a New York Life agent who can help you to secure your future and protect your family. New York Life–The Company You Keep.

    Hope you enjoy and I welcome any and all feedback!

    Attachments:
    You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #63975
      artyom123
      Participant

      Great read, everything that you set out to do in the description, you have successfully accomplished perfectly and I applaud you. The opportunity I hear would be to make it very conversational. Your reads sound a bit announcy. You did give a feeling of talking to me in the part when you said “Peace of mind is waiting to meet you all across the country”, whatever you did there, try it for the rest of the text. Keep at it, great job!

  • #63957
    CYeschenko
    Participant

    Continued practice! All comments are appreciated- especially related to performance. Thanks!

    YouTube Red

    Like watching YouTube? Like watching the 30 second ads at the beginning of videos? Didn’t think so. With a YouTube Red subscription, you could watch as many ad-free videos you like, offline. You can even listen to videos in the background when you open another app, and have access to exclusive content made by YouTube creators themselves. All this for only $9.99 a month, with a one-month free trial.

    Attachments:
    You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #63972
      LiamS
      Participant

      Hi Cy,

      You have a very nice voice, but it felt a little lacking in energy compared to what the script is. You are offering us this awesome service. Not having to watch ads awesome, listening to videos in the background on my phone a godsend, all for $9.99 that’s amazing. Your pacing was great, but adding energy into the read will give it that extra oomf.

  • #63948
    Dante M.
    Participant

    Hello everyone, it’s been a while! I’ve come back with three more varying commercial scripts that I practiced on. Criticism is highly encouraged!

    Attachments:
    You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #63959
      tomnunes
      Participant

      Hi, Dante. Awesome voice. A deep bass-baritone that commands attention.

      1) Nice overall tone inviting the listener in. Some things to consider. “Trendy.com” has a different cadence than you normally hear with a URL. It starts high on “tren” and goes down the scale the “dot com”. It sounded as if your lead in line was “Not unfashionable.com but trendy.com”. If that is intentional, the cool! Also consider if the words you emphasized are the important words in the script: It’s the number one shopping site for top name brands…; Everything you love, for less. My thought: “one”, “top name”, and “love” respectively.

      2) Once the copy was clearly about trucks, I was with you, and you brought it home. But I was confused where this was going at the start. Perhaps a lead in line like “What scares our competitors the most? Is it 50 foot…”. “No” lost some intensity and approached “naw”. “Nighty night” could be more threatening. I think your tone is great throughout, what one would expect for a spot on trucks. But you may have tried to push it deeper in pitch than your natural vocal range. I’d like to hear how it comes across in the lower end of your natural range but with the same ballsy tone.

      3). This was well-done. Love the optimism and the contrast from #2. A couple of technique notes: In “change the world around us”, “change”, “world”, and “around” had the same emphasis so its point was not clear. And make sure you don’t drop the “t” in Carnation Breakfast Essentials. (I worked on this script and was given the same note. 🙂 )

      Great work, Dante. Thanks for sharing with us.

      • This reply was modified 8 hours, 14 minutes ago by tomnunes.
      • This reply was modified 8 hours, 13 minutes ago by tomnunes.
      • #63966
        Dante M.
        Participant

        Appreciate the feedback!

    • #63956
      CYeschenko
      Participant

      The second copy (Ram) was your most solid! The quirky copy was well suited by your delivery and pacing, and the unique quality of your voice brought out the humor in it. The third one (Carnation) felt slightly robotic at the start though, especially in comparison with the other two. If you smooth out the delivery and make it a tad more conversational, you will have that one nailed as well!

  • #63943
    curtmartin13
    Participant

    Good afternoon! Working towards a narration demo and would appreciate any feedback. Thanks very much!
    –Curt

    Attachments:
    You must be logged in to view attached files.
  • #63933
    Mcsketcher
    Participant

    This is my 1st attempt at putting a demo together. Any and all thoughts welcome on audio quality, format, delivery/performance etc…

    • #63934
      Mcsketcher
      Participant

      Demo attempt. I welcome any and all thoughts on audio quality, delivery/performance, format, etc…

      Attachments:
      You must be logged in to view attached files.
      • #63971
        LiamS
        Participant

        Hi Mcsketcher,

        The Demo sounds great. Now it may be me, but the music was just a bit to strong compared to the vocals. Maybe lowering the volume of the music a touch or two would do the trick. I listened to it on both my headset and speakers and there were some moments I could not make out your voice over some of the music specifically in the second recording in the demo. Overall though you have some great delivery that I really enjoyed and the audio sounded great.

        • #63976
          Mcsketcher
          Participant

          I’m discovering its a fine line with background music. All audio files are not created equal and anything below -80hz will send you to klip-town with the quickness. I cut out anything below -80 and am using dueling compressors on the music and vocal tracks to control the volume. Still tweaking it though. I think I need to make the release quicker on the compressors. I just didn’t want it to sound too abrupt but I think that might be necessary for clarities sake. Theres a way to do it manually on a specific time segment if you just need to dampen a trouble spot but I have yet to venture down that road.

          • This reply was modified 2 hours, 40 minutes ago by Mcsketcher.
      • #63968
        tori811
        Participant

        The background music for each script is great!

        • #63970
          Mcsketcher
          Participant

          Thanks! I got them off storyblocks. I don’t know if I’m allowed to say that or not, but I’m doing it. I paid $30 for a month and downloaded A LOT of music. Its rights free for life. I figured that would be significantly easier than searching the web for free music. I started to do that and the task seemed a bit daunting. The websites great though. They classify the music so its easy to find something appropriate. No, I don’t work for them but I am def a fan.

  • #63926
    darleneharris
    Participant

    Hi Everyone!

    Here’s a recording of an e-learning narration script as I continue to work towards my narration demo. Any and all feedback is much appreciated!

    Reading music is often seen as a mysterious and arcane art – but it doesn’t have to be that way! The easy-to-follow lessons and innovative accompanying CD in How to Read Music will show you how to decode those little black dots and, in a short time, you’ll be surprised how fluent you’ve become!

    Attachments:
    You must be logged in to view attached files.
  • #63922
    jasjol71
    Participant

    As part of my narration demo, I would like to include something from the true crime genre. These are my first two attempts. My wife says I don’t sound evil enough… I’d love to hear which one you all think is best and any specific pointers!

    1. M****R FOR HIRE. It began, cops would tell Nancy, when they stopped a man named Aaron Wilkinson for a simple traffic violation. After spotting a gun in his car, deputies took Wilkinson to the station and were shocked when he told them he’d been hired to k**l a woman he didn’t even know. So who then who was the intended target? That’s right: Nancy Latham.

    2. DISAPPEARANCE OF TANNER WARD. Tenton, Missouri, is too small of a town to get lost in. But one evening last June, 19-year-old Tanner Ward, engaged to be married, father to a precious baby girl, vanished into thin air. Tanner’s family desperately searches for him, and police follow up on every lead, but they’re all dead ends.

    Attachments:
    You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #63941
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Jasjo171, good work! I love the true crime genre too. I really enjoyed the performance – you have a warm, friendly voice and it was really well done, but I too am not hearing a more serious tone for the reads. Maybe try it with the thought in mind that Nancy Latham is your sister and you are reporting on how she narrowly escaped getting killed. Imagine how relieved you would feel after hearing this news. Maybe think about trying it with a level of personal concern and seriousness. Lead-ins are really helping me get into the feel of the scripts – for this one, it could be something like “Did you hear what happened to my sister Nancy?”

      For the second read I would say the same thing, but it sounded a little more connected to me than the first read. Overall very good!

      Mary

  • #63915
    CYeschenko
    Participant

    Trying some different copy and continuing to practice! Any comments are appreciated, especially related to performance. Thanks!

    Functional Fitness

    Welcome to our functional training series. Breaking it down, functional training is simply turning your attention to training the body for movements we perform as we go about our daily lives. Movements like standing , sitting, stepping, reaching, pushing, pulling, getting balanced. Our training series has broken down those movements into a series of workouts to help you draw attention to how you perform those activities on a daily basis. This is designed to bring your awareness to your posture and your form, to the muscle groups that allow you to work in those capacities and hopefully keep you safe and keep you strong.

    Attachments:
    You must be logged in to view attached files.
    • #63940
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi CYeschenko, good work! I remember recording this one a while back and I was having trouble finding places to breathe, the script has some pretty long phrases – you did very well on that! Good variation in the lists (“…standing , sitting, stepping, reaching, pushing, pulling, getting balanced”), and really clear diction, which is perfect for this genre. Very good!

      Mary

    • #63921
      jasjol71
      Participant

      Extremely pleasant voice to listen to. The first couple of sentences sounded a bit choppy to me, but then you seemed to connect your words better toward the end. I also had the impression that you sped up a bit at the end. Overall, well done!

Viewing 755 reply threads
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.