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  • #15468
    David Goldberg
    Edge Studio Staff

    Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!

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  • #60229
    kfvoice
    Participant

    Another documentary. I’m trying not to sound like I am reading, and while this script is a short introduction, it did not flow well again. Perhaps nature reads are not my forte. All feedback is appreciated!

    Kathy

    Red Fox

    Possessing the legendary reputation for being cunning, the small and clever American Red Fox is respected throughout North America…

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    • #60281
      Official81
      Participant

      I absolutely love your voice it’s alluring. You didn’t sound like your reading to me at all. I’m a newbie to the industry and could be wrong in suggesting this, but I have read avidly since I was 7. I would have probably raised my pitch on that second vowel in “possEssing”. I have no idea why I would do that (lol) other than the fact that I read aloud a lot and kind of have an eye for where to add pitch and/or inflecting certain vowels or words. Hope this helps and VETERANS please let me know if this is a good tip. Excellent Job Kathy!

      • #60300
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Thank you, Lexi, for the feedback! Noted! I truly appreciate it! — Kathy

    • #60257
      Beckolin
      Participant

      You know, the first thing I thought of was how separate each of your words were, especially at “small and clever.” Yes, pick and choose your emphasis words, but I think if you elide the ends of words into the beginning of the following word more often, it will improve the flow and continuity. Maybe think of the overall phrase as more like a line of music.

      • #60302
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Thanks, Beckolin! That’s a good tip! Appreciate it!

        Kathy

    • #60247
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Kathy! Good read. I think since the this is a documentary on the red fox I would emphasize “American Red Fox” more than the adjectives “small and clever” so as to let the listener know the subject they are about to learn more about. This is minor and just my interpretation of things. Good read!

      Mary

      • #60304
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Hi Mary!

        Good point! I am usually mindful of the minor details. Thanks again for the feedback!

        Kathy

  • #60218
    Robert Broussard
    Participant

    Thanks for any feedback. Getting close to working on commercial demo.

    Budweiser

    I’m just a regular guy who wants the same things everybody else wants, food, family, shelter, friends, and plenty of ice cold Budweiser. Just not necessarily in that order.

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    • #60280
      Official81
      Participant

      Oh Robert! This read made me interested in a Budweiser and I don’t even drink beer lol. Your voice and the accent you add are very authentic. You sound clear your pacing was brilliant and you definitely sounded as if you were speaking to a friend. Nice Job!

    • #60248
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Robert! I really liked this read for you, totally believable. I agree too with editing out the micro-pause after “guy”, would just be a smoother flow to complete the thought. Good emphasis on “ice cold Budweiser” too. Very good!

      Mary

    • #60228
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Robert — Nice production! This had me chuckling, lol.

      If you edit out the micro-pause after “guy”, and vary your pitch with the list, this would make the read flow smoother. Just my thoughts.

      Kathy

  • #60200
    mkell755
    Participant

    Hello feedback friends! Here is a recording (on my phone) for any and all feedback. Let me know what you think. Thank you!

    Mary

    4/H
    It began with the seed of an idea. In 1902, the heartland needed folks to embrace new advances in agriculture. But leaders with open minds, strong hearts and willing hands were not in abundance. Luckily, kids were. By empowering the next generation to lead, 4/H sprouted roots. And grew. Grew kids who are confident and strong. Who are curious enough to question. And capable enough to find the answer. True leaders are not born. They’re grown. 4/H GROWS HERE

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    • #60279
      Official81
      Participant

      Great Job Mary! Sounded very nice and clear and I felt the pace and time were perfect for the script!

      • #60305
        mkell755
        Participant

        Thanks for the feedback Official81, really appreciate it! Definitely working on pacing and clarity. Thanks!

        Mary

    • #60234
      RYoung
      Participant

      Mary, you seem to have started off well in the first sentence, it sounded like your real voice and believable. This is obviously the goal and what we’re trying to do as voice actors believe me I struggle with this mightily. In your case simply speaking I would just be aware not to lift your pitch on the last word of your sentences it makes you sound sort of forced if that makes sense? You almost have to try and sound more boring than excited to get a believable read and one last thing I found was a roller coaster technique for inflecting if there’s no question in the sentence try and go up inflection early in the sentence and then down in the end, hope that helps.

      • #60235
        mkell755
        Participant

        Hi RYoung, thanks for the feedback. I agree with not lifting pitch in general on the last word, so I will work on that. I have received a lot of comments on dialing up the energy, so trying to be mindful of doing that and not sounding boring; I tend to get monotone if not specifically thinking about making it sound conversational and varying pitch, but it needs to sound natural too. Thanks again, all good points!

        Mary

    • #60227
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Hi Mary! Good read! Nice enthusiasm, and pitch variation. Keep it up!

      Kathy

      • #60236
        mkell755
        Participant

        Thanks for the feedback Kathy! I’m definitely working on natural-sounding enthusiasm. I’ve never done 4/H but believe it is a very worthy program that teaches so many things. Thanks again!

        Mary

    • #60215
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Good read Mary. Very consistent pace and tone. Have you ever thought about reading screen play scripts and acting out a character’s part? I had a voice coach in the spring and she had me play Stanly in “Street Car Named Desire”. Just a thought. If can be fun as well.

      • #60237
        mkell755
        Participant

        Hi Robert, thanks for the feedback! I have not acted out character parts before but I like the idea of that, I will look for them and see what I can find. Thanks again!

        Mary

  • #60192
    Official81
    Participant

    Hello Feedback Friends! My name is Lexi and I am very new to the industry. I recorded practice scripts for AARP and Honey Bunches of Oats commercials on a NT1-A Rode Condensor Microphone that is connected to a Focusrite Scarlett Solo 3rd Generation 2i2o USB Audio Interface. Please let me know your thoughts and I thank you in advance. Happy Holidays.

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    • #60249
      Eunice LaLanne
      Participant

      Hi Lexi! I must say – I just love the sound of your voice. Great job on both commercials – the volume and tone are great in both recordings. The only piece of constructive feedback I’d have to give is that I can audibly hear you take big breaths in the AARP recording (which can be distracting). If possible, come up with some breathing techniques that will help you take in the amount of air you need without us listeners “hearing” it. Looking forward to hearing your other recordings!!

      • #60274
        Official81
        Participant

        Thank you so much for the feedback! I will definitely work on my breathing techniques.

    • #60226
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Welcome Lexi! Very good first reads!

      Nice job with the pitch in each one — in AARP, the pitch was subtle, yet warm and natural, while enthusiastic in the Honey Bunches of Oates read.

      Sound quality was good — I, too, have a NT1-A Rode condenser mic (with Rode interface). I love it!

      A few minor things to be mindful of: 1) I heard a couple of “lip smacks” between sentences in the first script, and 2) “Oats” in Honey Bunches of Oates seemed to lower in volume and tone.

      A tip: Sometimes it is easier to give feedback when we can see the scripts to compare with your read.

      Overall, keep it up! I hope my feedback is helpful!

      Kathy

      • #60277
        Official81
        Participant

        Thank you so much Kathy my apologies for not adding the actual script wording. I will definitely do that moving forward. And also thank you for pointing out those mouth noises! I will also practice smoothing out my word transitions between sentences. I really appreciate this, so glad you mentioned it! It’s great to recognize so that no bad habits are formed. Very grateful for your feedback.

    • #60202
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Lexi! Welcome to the forum! I like your voice – very smooth, warm and friendly, and I like how you varied up the 2 scripts for a nice contrast between both. Good clarity and pacing for both scripts. Good enthusiasm on the Honey Bunches of Oats. Keep it up!

      Mary

      • #60275
        Official81
        Participant
        • This reply was modified 4 years, 4 months ago by Official81.
        • #60278
          Official81
          Participant

          Hello Mary! And thank you so much for listening to my practice reads. Greatly appreciate your feedback, I am happy to hear that the read sounded nice and clear for you. And I was kind of worried about my pacing so thank you for commenting in that regard. I am really enjoying the forum as well so thank you much for the warm welcome!

        • #60306
          mkell755
          Participant

          Hi Lexi, you are welcome! Pacing is tricky, really depends on the script for me. I look forward to hearing more from you!

          Mary

  • #60190

    Another practice read for my commercial demo! This one is for GE, thanks for listening!

    Everyone wakes up every morning to a world that must keep turning. Moving. Going. The world can’t stop, so neither can we. Because the things we make help make the world go round. We’re builders. Constantly creating things that make our world cleaner, healthier, and more connected. So that the small moments that help define who we are and the big plans that make life wonderful can keep on rolling. Here at General Electric, we’ll keep building a world that works.

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    • #60212
      RYoung
      Participant

      Gabe, nice acting on this, sounds very believable! The audio needs work or maybe you just to close to the mic in the last sentence, anyway thanks for sharing that!

    • #60203
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Gabe! Great read! You have a nice warm voice and it was very clear and had great energy. I know this is for practice, but your said “everybody” instead of “everyone” for the first word, just something to be mindful of. I liked the emphasis on “builders”. You might want to emphasize “General Electric” just a little more as the product name, just a thought. Very nice!

      Mary

  • #60181
    RYoung
    Participant

    Looking to add to my commercial demo reel with “Nike” it seems short enough to hold listener’s ear. Appreciate any comments!

    Nike
    It’s a mindset. A focus. A deep seated spirit. It’s an inner strength to keep your feet planted firmly on the ground, no matter what presses against you. It’s confidence. It’s belief. It’s a way of life. It’s Nike.

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    • #60225
      kfvoice
      Participant

      This is really really good, R! I would not change a thing! Adding Nike to your demo reel would be a great idea!

      Kathy

    • #60204
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi RYoung! Very nice read and production! Sounded very professional. I too like the variation in the lists. Very good!

      Mary

    • #60196
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Everything was good except that last pause at end was a little long. Good work.

    • #60187

      I loved the way you varied the lists here, every piece sounded different and specific! I thought there was maybe just a little too long a pause at the comma after “planted firmly on the ground” which interrupted the flow of your read just a bit. But great job overall!!

  • #60172
    BrianWigginsVO
    Participant

    More Commercial Demo homework…this time, my reads are for Excedrin Migraine, which is supposed to be a super conversational tone, and Dewalt, more of a blue-collar tone. I also included some alternate takes on the tag line in the Dewalt read.

    Any feedback on tone, clarity of intention, and pacing would be great. (Note: I tend to rush as a natural cadence, something all of my coaches have told me, and it’s something that we’re trying to work on.)

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    • #60224
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Hi Brian!

      I like the enthusiasm and tone you brought to each read.

      In the Dewalt script, halfway through/near the end, it did sound a little rushed — but as you mentioned, it is something you are working on. I think just a tad slower, and it would be good.

      I listened to the tag lines multiple times, and I narrowed it down to the first and second, and finally went with the second. To me, the second one is the tone and delivery that sounds the best for the tag line — you highlight Dewalt, but then close out the read in a bit of a softer and natural tone. Just my thoughts.

      I hope this helps!

      Kathy

    • #60205
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Brian! Good reads! I feel like the tone and pacing was very good for both reads. I liked the second tag line for Dewalt the best. Both reads were good, and I liked the conversational Dewalt tone a lot. I like how you stretched out “rain”, helped vary up that script and in effect slowed it down a little. Very good!

      Mary

    • #60179
      RYoung
      Participant

      I like the Dewalt read and the last take was the best with good enthusiasm!

  • #60169
    BrianWigginsVO
    Participant

    Could use some feedback on this audition…2 takes, 2nd starts at :15…biggest difference is how I’m hitting the first sentence. Brief called for casual but professional, so I was treating this like having a conversation with Sam from Accounting in the break room.

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    • #60223
      kfvoice
      Participant

      I agree with everyone — the second read was the one that captured the casual but professional tone.

      Kathy

    • #60206
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Brian, I like this script for you. I too liked the second read of this script better. It sounded more conversational, like you were talking with a co-worker. Very good!

      Mary

    • #60180
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Brain, both were good. I prefer the 2nd reading. It flowed better and seemed more conversational. Good job!

    • #60177
      RYoung
      Participant

      Hi Brian, second take was much better, I think. Without the script it’s hard to break it down, but listening to the ending it kind of trailed off, if that makes sense? A lot of auditions are not written very well and the brands are relatively unknown so it takes a lot of imagination to create something intriguing. Love to hear more of your character work though,(Joker)!!

  • #60162
    Robert Broussard
    Participant

    Another read from script library. Thanks for any feedback.

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    • #60222
      kfvoice
      Participant

      I really like this, Robert! I, too, agree with Mary and Brian about the tone. I also echo that while the tone is good, give it a little more energy.

      What stuck out to me, is that I liked how you delivered, and had emphasis, on the first “fresh”, “waves”, and “sea” at the end of the sentences.

      I don’t know what the script had, but it sounded like there was too long of a pause between “Wind Drift” and “does that too you.” I think you were trying to billboard and highlight Wind Drift, since it is the product you are selling. If you take out the pause, it would flow in that part of the script better. After that, the pauses work, to me anyway, because that is the tag line.

      I hope this helps!

      Kathy

      • #60368
        Robert Broussard
        Participant

        Thanks, I will work on that. Appreciate it.

    • #60207
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Robert, good read! Very calming and soothing, as Brian mentioned. It sounds little bit muffled on my end, but I don’t yet have a full recording setup, so this is just an observation. Very good!

      Mary

      • #60216
        Robert Broussard
        Participant

        Thanks Mary, I appreciate your input. Yes you are right. There was a word muttled there at the end. Not sure why that happened.

    • #60168
      BrianWigginsVO
      Participant

      I really love your tone, it’s very natural and calming; it has a great flow to it. That said, give more energy! Figure out which are the important words to hit, and make sure that they get the attention that the deserve. You don’t need to crank it to 11, especially with this read, but I would say give it a little more.

  • #60137
    Robert Broussard
    Participant

    Stella Artois Beer

    Of course Stella Artois tastes better than other beers. We’ve had over 600 years to get the recipe right. Since 1366 Stella Artois has been painstakingly brewed in a time honored tradition using the choicest ingredients which is why our customers have kept coming back for more even after 600 years. Stella Artois. Perfection has it’s price.

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    • #60208
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Robert, good read! I read this one awhile back and I really like hearing the same read by different people. Good pacing and tone throughout. Very good!

      Mary

    • #60167
      RYoung
      Participant

      Robert, I like this read it has passion to it! I agree with the pauses but you could edit those pretty easily. Great work and now I’m gonna go get a “Stella Artois”!

      • #60183
        Robert Broussard
        Participant

        Thanks and have one or two for me as well. 😎

    • #60159
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Your pacing was good. The third sentence was a bit of run on sentence, and it sounded better with some built in pauses. I know this is practice, however, just be mindful for an audition when it isn’t called for.

      Kathy

      • #60161
        Robert Broussard
        Participant

        Thanks Kathy, I was just reading the script form the library. That nade more difficult to do for sure. Thanks

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