Feedback Forum
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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Hi everyone, I am working on two more commercial reads and would welcome your feedback. Thank you, Ed
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Hi, Ed. You have a nice, distinctive voice. It is a folksy, friendly sound that makes me feel like everything is going to be alright. I think you could leverage that more with these reads. It’s not yet clear to me what you want me as the listener to do or think. For instance, each item listed after “Baltimore” felt the same and I couldn’t tell how you felt about each of them. I think if you connect more with that, and feed it with that voice of calm and reason, these will be stellar. Note on #2) there is a pause between “when everyone has access” and “to the best financial tools” which is really a single phrase. It felt like a catch breath, so see if you can give yourself a bigger breath beforehand.
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Hey Tom, thank you for your very specific comments on my reads. Yes, “the call to action” is a technique that I am continuing to work on. Yes, the need to be very specific is a central part of my training as I am preparing to record a commercial demo. On #2 – yes I hear that pause. Thanks again for your comments. They are very helpful.
Ed
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Hi – I am focusing on short form commercials, a few sentences max and requiring more energy and personality. I would appreciate your feedback. Still working on my recording space so quality won’t be the best. Thanks
ChasCap/n Crunch
Welcome aboard my museum of crunch history… A crunchy mammoth! A crunch-a-dactyl! Cap’n crunch cereals, a prehistoric part of this balanced breakfast.Danimals Yogurt
Danimals is the fruity-tasting snack all kids will agree on. It’s a good source of calcium, protein, vitamin D, and it tastes great too! Danimals. Better every day!Zellers
—– Local commercial, fast read, high energy—- Summer’s really heating up! Get into Zellers for our biggest event under the sun. Save up to 70 percent on a great selection of men’s, kid’s and ladies’ apparel and footwear. So hurry into Zellers – because savings like these don’t last forever.-
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Great read and emotion. a few things I noticed that are pretty simple fixes. On some words- especially operative main words, your tone went down. you can clearly hear it when you say Hurry in to ZELLERS. Im not referencing uptalk like you hear on tv, but more of just a level pitch. I hope that helps! Good luck mate.
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Howdy all. First read first use of a home studio. Compliments to the right, critique to the left.
Thank you.
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Hi Mark! I don’t know if it was intentional, but there is a major echo throughout which made it really hard to hear what you were saying, as it was almost like there were 2 mics recording, a similar effect when you join a conference call with your phone and also are speaking into a headset that are next to each other. I started out just using a free app on my phone, just a suggestion. I hope that helps. Keep it up!
Mary
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Hello again everyone! I am looking for any feedback you may have with this recording. My last recording I had a couple Glottal Stops so I wanted to work on that with this read and also see what other things might stick out to anyone.
Thanks in advance for your feedback!
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Hi Jay!
Good job on this. I like how you are connected the words together on this – it flows well for the most part. When you say “make your flight” at the beginning the pace is off and it does feel a bit choppy. It also feels just a bit too melodic as you continue through the read as if you are running up and down and up and down in a similar rhythm and tone through each of the sentences. I would recommend just putting a bit of variety throughout the read!
Have fun!
-Amber
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Hello! I’m brand new to commercial voice acting so any feedback would be appreciated! I’m working on having a more conversational tone. (The Honda commercial specifically is not really my forte)
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Hello! I liked your energy on all of them. It sounds like you may have an acting background, based on how naturally you inflect your voice to convey different emotions. I though they were all good. Perhaps the Honda spot could be a tad less energetic or slightly lower in volume. I think that more energetic approach was great for Starbucks and Match, but less effective for Honda. Your demo will be awesome.
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Here are the scripts so you can follow along! As well as the recordings in mp3 version.
Starbucks
Get more of what you love, for free With Starbucks® Rewards, say hello to easy ordering, endless choice—and yes, free coffee.*
Match.com
They Say Picky, We Say Power to You. Find Someone Who’s Right For You on Match today! We’ve Unlocked Match for Everyone. Now You Can Message Your Top Picks for Free!
Honda Accord
With three advances powertrains, a cabin full of technological innovations and honda sensing standard on all trims, the accord is everything a sedan should be and more.-
Hi Forceonature, good reads! I like the warmth in your voice, and the nice directness of it.
Script 1 – My favorite for you of these 3. Good variation in tone and inflection throughout, and there was a nice smile in your voice.
Script 2 – Good! I realize this is for practice, but you read “Matches” instead of “Match”, so just be aware of getting every word right (especially since it is the brand name being advertised)
Script 3 – “advances” was read as “advanced”. In this case I think advanced is more correct grammatically, so just something to watch. Really nice work, I want to hear more!Mary
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Hey Feedback Forum!
So these are my first recorded attempts at commercial type voice overs. And i’ve noticed that its quite a bit harder, for me at least, compared to narration work. But please any and all feedback/criticism is appreciated! I’ll also attach the scripts below for listeners to follow along!Acura RDX
Great design challenges more than just the eyes. It challenges the future. We designed the RDX to challenge not just the future of SUVs, but also the future of Acura. The future starts now. The future is the Acura RDX.
Acura. Everything we ever imagined. And then some.Mc Cholesterol
Come to McCholesterol’s and try our Triple Bacon and cheese Heart Attack Burger and triple fat fries! This Friday, for only fifty cents, at McCholesterol’s.
Eat like there’s no tomorrow…
Death by fast food, why not? …
Oh, is this thing still on? Oh yes, this Friday at McCholersteral’s…Eat like there’s no tomorrowHarvey Home Theatre
He has a 160 IQ, performs cardiac surgery for a living. And now, he can even operate his home entertainment system. Introducing Harvey Home Theater. It’s so sophisticated, it’s simple. Dimensions of sight and sound unheard of, until now. All at your fingertips. Now, if he could only operate the microwave. Home Theater from Harvey, not your ordinary electronics store. Call for the Harvey near you.
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Every one of your takes sounded so professional. You have a great voice for commercials and I enjoyed the humor you were able to pull off in the “McCholesterol” commercial, though maybe you could be more humorous. I think Harvey Home Theater was well done, but it has too many pauses, and there was even one in between “Introducing” and “Harvey Home Theater.” You should leave pauses at periods and commas. Also, the beginning of “Acura” sounds off. I got the impression you were saying “challenges” as a noun, but I think it should be as a verb. Hope this helps.
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Hi Dan, good work on these! I liked all of them. I liked Acura the best of these three. I think you could lean into the humor a little more for McCholesterol’s and Harvey Home Theater, really emphasize certain words to pump up the energy. If you are coming from narration, it may even sound a little over the top in your head, but for both of those scripts you can push it and get great results. Good work!
Mary
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Hi Dan!
What an excellent and resonate voice you have. I especially love the humor you bring to your reads! You’re incredibly believable and conversational in the McCholesterol’s read. I think for the Harvey’s commercial bringing that same energy would really elevate your read! It’s a humorous and sarcastic script so I think leaning more into the conversational, light hearted tone would really work.
Excellent work!
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Would love an opinion on my emotional connection to text and feedback to improve. Thank you all, -Art
What matters most in your life?
What if there was a simple way to protect it all?
Welcome to The Insurance Box.
With The Insurance Box, finding the right life insurance for your specific needs has never been easier.
That’s because we’re your insurance advocate. Our digital platform helps you find and customize the perfect life insurance solution from leading insurance providers…all at affordable prices.
Our intuitive, easy-to-use online tools allow you to compare rates, calculate the right amount of coverage, and get a free quote within minutes. Of course, it’s all backed by our team of leading insurance experts standing by to answer any questions you have. -
Hello hello! Here I am for my final commercial coaching homework – 3 scripts as polished and refined as I could get them/hear them. To my ear I tried to record these with no glottal stops, no uptalk, no unnecessary pauses (only pausing at commas and periods), no words were under enunciated, and lastly I ensured that any list was varied within.
Here are the scripts, let me know how I did, if I actually succeeded at producing 3 very polished reads or not!Intuition – Introducing Intuition. The only all-in-one razor that lathers and shaves in one easy step. You’ll never need shave gel, soap or body wash again, because Intuition’s triple blades are surrounded by a unique Skin Conditioning Solid. With just water, it smooths and soothes to give you soft, smooth, touchable skin with every shave. Shaving’s never been so simple.
Crayola Markers – Crayola Color Wonder Markers color only on special paper. So, your kids can express their creativity more often…in more places…with less mess. Crayola Color Wonder. It starts with Crayola.
New York Life – Peace of mind is waiting to meet you all across the country. In towns big and small, there’s a New York Life agent who can help you to secure your future and protect your family. New York Life–The Company You Keep.
Hope you enjoy and I welcome any and all feedback!
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Great read, everything that you set out to do in the description, you have successfully accomplished perfectly and I applaud you. The opportunity I hear would be to make it very conversational. Your reads sound a bit announcy. You did give a feeling of talking to me in the part when you said “Peace of mind is waiting to meet you all across the country”, whatever you did there, try it for the rest of the text. Keep at it, great job!
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Continued practice! All comments are appreciated- especially related to performance. Thanks!
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Hi Cy,
You have a very nice voice, but it felt a little lacking in energy compared to what the script is. You are offering us this awesome service. Not having to watch ads awesome, listening to videos in the background on my phone a godsend, all for $9.99 that’s amazing. Your pacing was great, but adding energy into the read will give it that extra oomf.
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