Hi, I’m Pecos Red for Justin Boots. Ever heard the term: “All Hat and no cattle”? That’s the problem with a lot of boots I know. Sounds weird, but the thing of it is that most boots don’t do the same things your feet do, like expand and contract when you take a step. Most boots are rigid, which is why your “dawgs commence to barkin’” and get all swole up, from yer boot-heels a wanderin’.At Justin Boots, our technology is a simple idee that comes right out of the way your foot works. It’s how we build ever’ boot we make. So it expands and flexes the way your foot does when it’s out ridin’ the range, or just boot-scootin’ out at Billy Bob’s. Justin Boots Quality. It’s a DANG good thing! I’m Pecos Red, remindin’ ya: never kick a cow chip on a hot day! Justin Boots. Don’t wear ‘em. Use ‘em!
That was a really fun read! I love all the sound effects! You have a great voice and my only suggestion is building in some pauses at the beginning as it read a little fast and streamed together. You did it great towards the end.
Hi everyone, I am working on two more reads for a commercial demo. I would appreciate your comments on any of it. Also how is the sound quality? Thank you in advance!
Ed
I agree with Tom in regards to giving more direction to the words “That Look”, basically just having a stronger opinion of what you think that look is (pure delight, ecstasy, etc). I also agree with visualizing what you see a bit more. You have a great resonance to your voice and definitely have the relaxing vibe down.
This may just be more personal preference, but I think after you say the first line “There are over a thousand families that need our help” (i.e. the problem), the second line could use more of a feeling of hope and be a little more uplifting. It sounds a little somber, which is perfect for the first line but maybe there’s a way to lighten up the next line since it’s a great thing they’re offering, while still getting the message across. I hope this is helpful!
Tina, thank you for your clear, specific comments. I really appreciate them! Your comments on having a strong opinion on the opening of the VRBO spot is a good one. Thanks also for the point about bringing more of an uplifting feel to the second read.
Much appreciated!
Ed
On the first, I think your easy-going sound is great for this. I like where it’s going. I would keep working more on envisioning the scene and painting the picture. Do you have an image in mind for “That look.” and what that look does to you? A pronunciation note: VRBO is pronounced “verbo”. (I learned this listening to some commercials on YouTube.)
In the second read, I like the sound of compassion without overdoing the pathos. That said, I feel you can add a bit more pathos to “you can give back to these heroes who gave up so much for you”. It’s a careful balance. You don’t want to lay a guilt trip, but you want us to feel they have earned this. Watch the pauses. I think phrases can be better connected. Ex: “by providing them / with mortgage-free homes” A pronunciation note: you said “Tunnel to Towers” at the start but “Tunnels to Towers” at the end.
Audio sounded good to me. I didn’t pick up any room noise.
This reply was modified 3 years, 9 months ago by tomnunes.
Tom, once again thanks for your very specific comments. Thanks for the heads up on pronouncing VRBO! Your point on envisioning the scene is one I am continuing to work on. Good to hear the audio quality is good.
Thanks again.
Ed
I am giving a commercial read for homework on this one. I am really working on emotions on this read, but also a bit on diction/enunciation. I welcome all feedback and any tips you might have. Thanks!
You have great emotion on this read and I can tell that you are working on the diction. I’d say even more enunciation on the word freshy(it’s a hard word to say clearly). I think you may have to say the second syllable a little slower, like fresh-eee, like let it hang there just a tiny bit longer. I’d say try it a couple of times super-overenunciating each word, even if you have to do it slower, and listen to yourself so you can gauge how much you have to do. I look silly all the time. 🙂 It’s almost there, though!
just dropping off some commercial reads that I did as homework for my coach.
BLACKBRIDGE MOTORS
Here’s to the Mavericks. Here’s to the rebels and renegades.
The square pegs who were anything but square.
You got this far by never blending in, and never compromising your soul.
Why bend now when you’ve lived the adventure on your terms?
Blackbridge Motors
Because the only road worth taking is the one you’ve forged yourself.
CARNATION BREAKFAST ESSENTIALS
Kids can change minds. They can even change the world around us. Packed with protein plus 21 vitamins and minerals, we nourish them with Carnation Breakfast Essentials. Because today could change everything.
ELIXINOL
Now more than ever, we could all use a break.
A little time to take a deep breath. Close our eyes, and know that it’s all going to work out.
At Elixinol we’ve created our new CBD and ashwaganda liquid capsules for just that.
Because don’t we all just want to Stress Less?
Elixinol
Jay, all three of these are really good! Your tone on each is right on! so is your pacing. My only note would be on the second read your pronunciation on “vatamins” could be clearer.
Your voice is a really good fit for the Blackbridge Motors read and I think you know what the scripts are looking for. Same for your second script. You have good natural instincts. I’m drawing a blank for constructive criticism on these. Good work!
I tried a script for a virtual tour! Thanks for any feedback. 🙂
Welcome to Morton Arboretum, home to more than 36 HUNDRED native trees, shrubs, and plants. This virtual guide provides a snapshot of what to expect when you visit our Wheaton, Illinois location. First, let’s look at how to get the most from your virtual tour. See the 5 Main tabs across the top of your screen–Introduction, Trees, Shrubs, Plants, and Frequently Asked Questions? The “Introduction” tab is highlighted because your tour automatically started here when you clicked the “Enter” button on the home page. Use your mouse to click on a different Key page. Each Key page lists subcategories in its left pane. Hover your mouse over each subcategory to view a drop-down menu, then click the subtopic you want. Use the black scroll bar to navigate subcategories. Use the white scroll bar at the right of your screen to navigate each Main page. Now let’s continue.
I liked your warm, enthusiastic tone – made me feel welcome from the very beginning. I imagined looking at (your) screen and following the instructions – pacing very comfortable for me. I feel that it was the sincerity in your voice that really made the reading so compelling.
Good morning everyone! So, part of my homework assignment was to upload two commercial script reads. As you’ll see below, I did one commercial and one interactive kid’s game. I wanted to test out my versatility and so I’m looking forward to your feedback! Thank you in advance for taking the time to listen to my reads and providing your thoughts.
For my first practice read, I chose The Travelers Insurance Company (television Commercial).
We all share the same same goals in business and in life. Security… protection… trust. What every man, woman, and child seeks from birth. What we at The Travelers have been dedicated to providing for 130 years. A difference backed by over $100 billion in assets, and the knowledge that every customer under America’s umbrella is our most important one. The Travelers Insurance Company.
For my second practice read, I chose Pixels (interactive computer game).
1. Which on of these things start with the letter “B”? A pencil… a car… a ball… or an apple? Touch your answer on the screen and hit “Enter”
– Hey you got it! You could hear the “buh” sound in the word “ball”.
– I’m sorry, that is not correct. Try again.
2. Hey, somebody ripped up this picture. Can you figure out what it was? Was it a horse, a cat, a pig or a dog?
– Good going! It was a dog. You have sharp eyes.
– Oops, that is not right, Try again.
3. All of these things are neat to eat, but three of them aren’t a treat for your teeth. Which thing is good for you and your teeth?
– That’s right! The carrot is very good for you.
– That is not the right answer. Try again
Great reads! Nice clarity. The only thing I noticed on the first read is the consonant on “child” was lost, and that’s a word I lose it on, so just make sure you get that sound in. Other than that it sounded great!
Nice energy in the second read. Great read with enthusiasm and you can definitely tell that your audience is meant to be young. I think this might just be personal preference, but if you say “uh” instead of “ay” when you list the things I think it might punch up the object more and put less focus on the A. Ex. “A pencil, a car, a horse, etc.” Maybe try it once that way and see how it feels to you and see if you know what I mean? I hope this is helpful!
Sadly, the audition closed before I could submit, but I liked the direction this ended up going…the brief called for “dramatic, slow, poignant, and a hint of a whisper”, with the note that it would be over dark imagery.
I’m working with a few commercial scripts similar in style to a few that will be on my demo. Here’s the latest I would appreciate your feedback on. Still working on studio buildout so pardon the echo.
Tx – Chas
There’s a place close by that celebrates nature’s beauty and man made grandeur. That’s steeped in history where you can follow in a family’s footsteps and let your imagination soar. Explore the many wonders of Biltmore Estate and discover a quick getaway close to home.
Great energy on this read. A suggestion would be to try it with a bit more wonder and slow done a touch at the beginning to really set up the visuals that you are painting. You have a great voice!
Hello, everyone! Two quick reads to test out my newly-padded hall closet/sound booth. Certainly welcome any and all performance feedback, but mainly looking for thoughts on recording quality (I’m hoping I’ve managed to shed the “room buzz” and “recording in a tin can” quality I was getting in earlier records). As always, my thanks for taking the time to listen!
E*TRADE
Who do you trust to handle your investments? The brokers? The pundants? Your sister’s neighbor’s boyfriend? When it comes to investing, there’s one person you should trust above all others–yourself. It’s time for E*TRADE.
VISA
Your “everywhere” can be your wildest dreams, or rise from the battle within. A challenge to push yourself further. Your “everywhere” can be anywhere. It’s not a place on any map, it’s a place you reach in life. Visa. Everywhere you want to be.
This reply was modified 3 years, 9 months ago by rogue1.
The sound is MUCH better. Nice job with whatever treatment you did. I’d reach out to a more expert person on this to see if there is any fine tuning that can help or artifacts my untrained ear can’t hear. But, you definitely improved the sound a lot.
Thanks, Tom! Relieved that a spare comforter tacked to the walls can make such a marked difference (and, yes, I’ll be sure to check with a professional outfit for any other underlying aural problems before recording anything official). Thanks again for taking the time to weigh in–as always, I appreciate your input!
All feedback appreciated. Thanks!
Barneys Mens apparel 60s from 70s TV
In 1923 Barney Pressman opened a little store on 7th Avenue and 17th Street. He opened that store with a grand total of 40 suits. He sold the suits during the good times and he got by on the seat of his pants during the bad times. He worked long…and he worked hard. But if he did anything, he always gave the people in this town what they wanted. Their money’s worth. He named his store Barney’s. And today his store is still giving people their money’s worth. Only now, Barney’s has a lot more to give. Today that little hole in the block is not only the whole block, it’s the single largest men’s store in the world. Barney’s has changed a lot since 1923…but the idea of giving people their money’s worth hasn’t.