Feedback Forum
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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Hey Guys!
Here are the 3 scripts i recorded for homework for my coach. im working on my glottals and trying to use more range in my voice. Feedback is welcomed.
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Hello all! I’m looking for any and all feedback here – same script read 2 slightly different ways. Which do you like better and why? Thanks!
Mary
HGTV – Designer Challenge
One Room in desperate need of a makeover. Three possible solutions. Which would you choose? Designer’s Challenge. Coming up Next. Only on HGTV.-
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Hi Mary,
I thoroughly enjoyed listening to both readings, but I felt that the second reading was the one that seemed the more natural, the more convincing. It was almost as if you were addressing an audience that you could actually see. Sounds a little bizarre, I am sure, but it seemed that there was more of a connection between you and an audience in your second reading and that that translated into a more natural flow, with emphasis falling where your instincts told you, and suggestion of a script in your hands pushed to one side.
Thank you for sharing.
John
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Good evening everyone, I have three more scripts that I’m interested in sharing! As always, I appreciate extreme criticism!
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Hi Dante, very nice! I really like your nice deep voice and warm delivery – great clarity and pacing. I like scripts 1 and 3 best for you. The second script felt more like you were reading to me, not sure why that was exactly, maybe just more emphasized enunciation than the other two? The other two sounded more natural and with good inflection levels. Keep up the good work!
Mary
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I believe the volume was loud on my end in listening to your recording. You can always normalize down to correct that unless you were redlining when recording. Otherwise your delivery is great, I would just back off on the mic slightly to avoid too many mouth noises, unless that was the volume issue? Ancient mysteries was a little too stiff, so relax maybe and try a more conversational delivery? Hope that helps and good luck!
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All comments most welcome!
The Chevy Silverado Trail Boss
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Ready to off-road…right from the factory.
Chevy….find new roads… -
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Good read, great tone and pacing and your voice is just right for this copy. I’m probably just nitpicking here but in your 2nd line, maybe shorten the pauses between, maintained, fixed or replaced, so that it flows a little more smoothly. And maybe add a little more weight to “million” in your fourth line. Nice job!
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Justin Boots
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Hi everyone, I am working on two more reads for a commercial demo. I would appreciate your comments on any of it. Also how is the sound quality? Thank you in advance!
Ed-
Hey Ed!
I agree with Tom in regards to giving more direction to the words “That Look”, basically just having a stronger opinion of what you think that look is (pure delight, ecstasy, etc). I also agree with visualizing what you see a bit more. You have a great resonance to your voice and definitely have the relaxing vibe down.
This may just be more personal preference, but I think after you say the first line “There are over a thousand families that need our help” (i.e. the problem), the second line could use more of a feeling of hope and be a little more uplifting. It sounds a little somber, which is perfect for the first line but maybe there’s a way to lighten up the next line since it’s a great thing they’re offering, while still getting the message across. I hope this is helpful!
Tina
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Hi, Ed. Nice reads.
On the first, I think your easy-going sound is great for this. I like where it’s going. I would keep working more on envisioning the scene and painting the picture. Do you have an image in mind for “That look.” and what that look does to you? A pronunciation note: VRBO is pronounced “verbo”. (I learned this listening to some commercials on YouTube.)
In the second read, I like the sound of compassion without overdoing the pathos. That said, I feel you can add a bit more pathos to “you can give back to these heroes who gave up so much for you”. It’s a careful balance. You don’t want to lay a guilt trip, but you want us to feel they have earned this. Watch the pauses. I think phrases can be better connected. Ex: “by providing them / with mortgage-free homes” A pronunciation note: you said “Tunnel to Towers” at the start but “Tunnels to Towers” at the end.
Audio sounded good to me. I didn’t pick up any room noise.
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Hello Everyone!
I am giving a commercial read for homework on this one. I am really working on emotions on this read, but also a bit on diction/enunciation. I welcome all feedback and any tips you might have. Thanks!
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You have great emotion on this read and I can tell that you are working on the diction. I’d say even more enunciation on the word freshy(it’s a hard word to say clearly). I think you may have to say the second syllable a little slower, like fresh-eee, like let it hang there just a tiny bit longer. I’d say try it a couple of times super-overenunciating each word, even if you have to do it slower, and listen to yourself so you can gauge how much you have to do. I look silly all the time. 🙂 It’s almost there, though!
Tina
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Hello there,
just dropping off some commercial reads that I did as homework for my coach.
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Here’s to the Mavericks. Here’s to the rebels and renegades.
The square pegs who were anything but square.
You got this far by never blending in, and never compromising your soul.
Why bend now when you’ve lived the adventure on your terms?Blackbridge Motors
Because the only road worth taking is the one you’ve forged yourself.
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Now more than ever, we could all use a break.
A little time to take a deep breath. Close our eyes, and know that it’s all going to work out.
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Elixinol -
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