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  • #78539
    MayeWest
    Participant

    Hello everyone! This is my first upload and yes I am very nervous! Besides me sounding breathy, what do you think?? Thank you in advance! ~Valley

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    • #78619
      88KeysDC
      Participant

      I now want to try a fish boil lol. My only suggestion would to be to maybe bring a little more energy to the fish boil read (without going over the top). But for your first attempt, pretty good stuff!

      • #79063
        MayeWest
        Participant

        I’m glad my vo makes you want to try a fish boil 🙂
        Thank you for your feedback!!!

    • #78608
      daveg
      Participant

      have you ever watched “in a world”?

      • #79062
        MayeWest
        Participant

        Hello! I have never watched in a world. Should I check it out?

    • #78561
      elizbrooksbell
      Participant

      Sounds great! I agree that drinking water is super helpful.

      • #78562
        MayeWest
        Participant

        Thank you very much!! I’ll keep that in mind.

    • #78546
      Logan DFD
      Participant

      Good reads! They’re nice and clear. As for the breathy-ness of your recordings, you could do what I suggested to JNMullett, where you make space around each breath for easy cutting (if you have an editing software, that is). If you can’t edit your recordings, something you could do is to experiment with training your body to take quiet breaths (maybe raising the soft palette in the back of your mouth when you breathe?). Or you could turn your head away when you breathe to keep the microphone from picking it up as much.

      In the second read, you had a few mouth sounds. To treat that, I’d say drink a LOT of water. Hydration is really important for Voice Over work.

      Great work, and keep it up!

      • #78565
        MayeWest
        Participant

        Thank you for your feedback! Raising my soft pallet is definitely doable. I’ll record my next script using my shift pallet as well as the turning of the head. This has been helpful. Oh yes….. and lots of water!!!!

  • #78534
    JNMullett
    Participant

    Hi All,

    Still working on my Narration demo. I’ve posted my latest practice read, and would love any feedback you might have. Thanks in advance!!

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    • #78545
      Logan DFD
      Participant

      The recording sounds like a commercial! The only problem is that there are a lot of strange, choppy pauses, like the kind after editing the audio. I’m assuming it’s to get rid of the breaths? If you want to do that, I suggest that after saying your line you pause, breathe, pause again, and read the next line. That way, the breaths will be easier to remove. Still, great work!

    • #78538
      MayeWest
      Participant

      Although I didn’t hear you take a breath in between some sentences, this sounds pretty good.

  • #78529
    elizbrooksbell
    Participant

    Looking for some feedback for my narrations!

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    • #78611
      daveg
      Participant

      well….that’s a young sound! bravo! Room needs some more treatment – a bit reflective. closer to mic, maybe? technique is key! also, try and study the TV spots with headphones on. mimic them. practice. use ispot for samples and transcribe scripts so you are using actual scripts…this young sound is in demand, but you have a ways to go…smoother delivery please…

    • #78544
      Logan DFD
      Participant

      Sounds pretty good! You’re reading it nice and clearly. Something you might want to consider is ending your sentences with an upward swoop, maybe? That way your sentences don’t always end the same way.

      Great job!

  • #78521
    samsheeks
    Participant

    Hi All, Would love some feedback on this practice recording. Thanks so much!

    • #78525
      Amitofu
      Participant

      You forgot to attach the files I think, haha

  • #78502
    ladyburdkm
    Participant

    Hey y’all, I am a novice; this is my very first time submitting to this forum. I have future coaching classes starting next week and recently had a one-on-one with Jennifer Sims! She was wonderful and told me all about this forum. She also was influential in my microphone/hardware purchase too! I just moved and decided to use my closet in my home office for my studio since I already work from home. 🙂
    Here are 2 commercial reads: I welcome any feedback, but mostly on creativity, tone, and flow. I am still learning a lot, especially on the technical side. There is a lot to digest! I have read through some of the feedback on here already, and you are all wonderful. I loved listening to some of the reads thus far, and you are all inspiring. Thank you for your time.

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    • #78527
      RGK3
      Participant

      Hi,

      These are nice. Very clear and the tone and pace are appropriate. I liked 4 better. It was more specific and there was more variation as you described the music choices. It sounded like you were experiencing the platform and sharing your experience with someone.

      • #78658
        ladyburdkm
        Participant

        Thank you for the feedback! I am going to keep practicing.

  • #78497
    johntells114
    Participant

    Hello everyone. I would appreciate any feedback on this narration. Thank you.

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    • #78500
      Amitofu
      Participant

      I’ma be real with you. This is so monotone I felt like falling asleep. I guess a more somber tone is kinda what you were going for? Your voice is good, but you need to emote a bit harder, even if the piece is melancholy. As an exercise, try reading it with uncomfortable excessive amounts of overacting (practically shouting), and then try to go back and read it as normal (and even your own attempt to make it extremely monotone if you want to compare and contrast). It should help you pick up on where you need to breath life in to the read. It doesn’t have to be high strung, but it does need a emotional investment; if that makes sense.

  • #78484
    madtrammell
    Participant

    Hello Everyone!
    Hope you are all having a great weekend! I am in the process of working to my demo record for narration, and I have recorded my first practice clip. I would greatly appreciate any feedback that anyone has for my first attempt!

    Thank you

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    • #78493
      Amitofu
      Participant

      Great job! I guess it would depend on what kind of read you were going for, but your read as-is has a more subdued energy, which I might expect out of the informational kiosks at some museums. Definitely not a bad thing, but of course just to be aware. Your voice has a very nice texture

      On the tech side, there’s a few clicks but largely negligable. Overall it sounds like you’re using good mic technique. I will say I can hear a background hum or other steady sound in the background while you’re speaking (I’m assuming you used a noisegate for in-between words) . Obviously I don’t know your situation, but if you are looking to use that booth for your demo then you should ask your coach about it (the noise). It’s not distracting that much, but more keen employeers might pick-up on it.

      Fantastic start for a first attempt. I wish my first attempt was as good off, haha.

      • #78671
        madtrammell
        Participant

        Thank you for the feedback, I will note those technical issues and work to fine tune them going forward!

    • #78487
      Cheechman
      Participant

      Sounds good, but more inflection (excitement) in yuor voice would help. Use it to highlight the key words

  • #78477
    Amitofu
    Participant

    Hey everybody. Been a while. I did a cold read of this because I just moved and made a new recording space and wanted technical feedback on the room treatment (echo/reverb, warmth, etc). I’ve listened to so samples that I can’t tell what’s normal, haha. The read itself has performative failings because it’s perfunctory, so don’t worry about that. Thanks!

    (For veracity, I’ve left the fan noise in the background unedited, but I’m aware its there lol)

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    • #78482
      edixon310
      Participant

      I’d say you’re about 99% there. There is a slight resonance, not sure why.
      I don’t know if you do your own postproduction editing, but perhaps a noise reduction would eliminate it. Or maybe watch your placement to the mic. It may also be the fan, because it almost sounds like that sound you get when talking into a fan. A good mic will pick that up and it’s hard to edit. (Spit balling here)

      • This reply was modified 2 years, 4 months ago by edixon310.
      • #78486
        Amitofu
        Participant

        good to know! thanks

  • #78464
    mcarter
    Participant

    Hi All! Back with two more reads. Any and all feedback is appreciated! Thanks!

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    • #78668
      Gill
      Participant

      Hi MCarter,
      I think your voice pairs really well with the reads you picked. Your pace is good for both but I think overall they could both use a little bit more energy.
      Wisteria:At the beginning just be careful of pauses as they make your read sound a little disconnected. Also, try varying your words as most of them are landing on the same note along with hitting Wisteria Bank. With diction, I hear ” we understand “the” behind every dream” and I’m thinking it should be “That” instead of “the.”
      Priceline: Try varying your words with this read as well. I hear “Top the line instead of Top of the line” so just be mindful with that as well. I liked what you added to “But one of them is paying 40% less. Can you guess who?” nice job with those lines.

    • #78488
      Cheechman
      Participant

      Need to hilight the key words with more excitement or tone.
      Less reading and more feeling.
      Good job

    • #78476
      Amitofu
      Participant

      Good start. idk if you wanted technical feedback but the first thing I noticed is that your recording space doesn’t sound very treated at all. big echo/reverb, haha.

      Performance wise, it sounded very back and forth if you knew who you were talking to and why (if that makes sense). For example, the ending tag line for both of yours are pretty on point, but the opening phrase for priceline sounded like it was a (internal) question, more than statement (then followed by the rhetorical question). Or at the beginning of the Bank ad, “Go for it” almost sounds like a deadpan challenge instead of an encouragement.

      Overall a few things need tweaking but I think youre on the right track.

      [[Disclaimer: I’m a rookie with ADHD. Sometimes I hyper-focus on something negligible and other times I make out-right ‘bad’ calls based on something I (wrongly) idealize. Also conversely, I can miss an elephant in the room. I focus on constructive criticism on the basis of improvement, so it may not be apparent how good I think a recording is; it’s not because I don’t want to gush about all the awesomeness 🙂 ]]

  • #78459
    Sarania
    Participant

    Hello!
    These are for my commercial homework. I would love feedback on my read. I also tried out some new techniques in my DAW so any feedback on the sound quality would be very much appreciated.

    Thank you!

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    • #78475
      Amitofu
      Participant

      Fantastic job on the energy/performance!

      I second that occasionally the pauses threw off the rhythm a bit. Other than that, the second one (purina) had background noise and a bit of reverb going on especially in “To help pet owner make a better place for pets!”.

      Other than that no complaints!

    • #78467
      RGK3
      Participant

      Hi:

      These are very nice reads, very natural with lots of specifics. The only note I’d give is that sometimes the pauses between phrases throw off the natural rhythm a bit.

      • #79070
        elizbrooksbell
        Participant

        I agree with the pauses thing, but I also thought you sounded great! It sounded like a real commercial!

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