Feedback Forum
- This topic has 10,047 replies, 724 voices, and was last updated 1 week, 2 days ago by
micpri53.
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August 7, 2020 at 9:27 am #15468
David Goldberg
Edge Studio StaffHi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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This topic was modified 4 years, 8 months ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 years, 5 months ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 years, 8 months ago by
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October 5, 2022 at 10:40 pm #80581
Kent
ParticipantHoping to do my narration demo very soon. Just started in on commercial, so I’m trying to bring a little of the oomph from that area into narration. Hoping I’m not losing any of the basics whilst focusing on that part. How’s it sound? Thanks for the input. I do read it and take it to heart.
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October 5, 2022 at 10:59 pm #80583
RBenesVO
ParticipantGreat read! Audio sounds good, real nice inflections and above all it was engaging. Only piece was the last two seconds at :38 came a little garbled and unsure if you said “killing”. Overall the whole read was easy to understand and flowed well.
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October 5, 2022 at 7:32 pm #80569
bnielsen15
ParticipantHi everyone! Got some more Narration homework for you. As always, any feedback is welcome and appreciated.
Thank you!
Apollo 16: The year was 1967, and the astronauts of Apollo 16 were going to the moon. This is Charlie Duke, Lunar Module Pilot on Apollo 16. This amazing little capsule went by the call-sign CASPER, and it was the heart of an immense system of rocket engineering that got the astronauts safely to the moon and back.
Recycling: I don’t know about you, but I like our planet a lot! And one of the easiest ways we can help protect the Earth is by recycling. That’s where instead of throwing things like plastic in the trash, you put them in a special bin so they go to a kind of factory to be reused. You’ve probably recycled things like plastic bottles before. There might even be a recycling bin in the room you’re in right now!
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October 5, 2022 at 9:20 am #80550
Jaljr
ParticipantMornin friends –
Here are three reads for an upcoming narration coaching session
Brevard College Admission video
JFK and Vanderbilt are toursAll lightly edited. Thanks for your comments
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October 5, 2022 at 4:03 pm #80564
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October 4, 2022 at 7:57 pm #80541
Grace17
ParticipantHello everyone,
Here are 3 narration audios. I would love feedback on any of them. Blue Angels and Covideo are sales videos, and Space Camp is a children’s museum exhibit. Thank you!
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October 4, 2022 at 8:05 pm #80543
Grace17
ParticipantHello everyone,
Here are my 3 narration audios in mp3 this time. I would love feedback on any of them. Blue Angels and Covideo are sales videos, and Space Camp is a children’s museum exhibit. Thank you!
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October 4, 2022 at 1:47 pm #80528
Cheechman
Participant-
October 5, 2022 at 7:45 pm #80573
RBenesVO
ParticipantConcur with Grace17. You have a nice conversational tone which is hard to find naturally. It doesn’t sound forced. I also agree with Grace on not upticking so much on the syllables but changing the pitch for each item listed instead. If you can be believable you’re ahead of the vast majority of people out there!
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October 4, 2022 at 8:19 pm #80547
Grace17
Participant#1 sounds very conversational but I think up-ticking the last syllables of each phrase in the list(ex: expertise, technology, counseling, nutrition) removes from the confidence of the read and makes it sound too casual in my opinion.
In #2 you sound more confident in your list of items, but I would advise you to explore listing them without elevating the last syllables, as i mentioned above. I also advise exploring varying the pitch on each item, just to explore other ways of listing the items.
I really liked how down-to-earth and conversational this read was. Your read is believable and you don’t try too hard.
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October 3, 2022 at 11:23 pm #80515
Wltrcurtis
ParticipantHi everyone, I’m looking to get feedback on a narration read. All feedback is welcome. Thanks in advance
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October 4, 2022 at 7:58 pm #80542
jliebert
ParticipantGreat voice and I like the tone overall. I would slow down the pace a bit, as it is a little hard to follow and sounds rushed. Also, echoing feedback I just got from my coach, it sounds a little choppy. Be mindful of longer-than-needed pauses in the middle of a phrase (for example after “too much time…”).
In the sentence “Due to the nature…”, I would hit more words to emphasize meaning and clarity.
I would hit: “nature”, “frequently”, “split up”, “scattering”, and “legwork”.I liked the following part, albeit a little slower, and slightly less pause after “moving”: “Pacing is critical for keeping your players interested. Keep the game’s pace moving smoothly using these tips”
Just my 2 cents. Best of luck!
Jeff
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October 3, 2022 at 6:25 pm #80509
adarn010
ParticipantGreetings All,
Pleasure to make your acquaintances. Currently going through the training program and was hoping to get some feedback on these two recordings. One is Narration Corporate while the second is Narration Documentary. Thanks.
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This reply was modified 2 years, 6 months ago by
adarn010.
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October 4, 2022 at 5:58 pm #80537
Dexterius
ParticipantFirst of all, I want to start out by saying that I thought that both of your readings were very good. Now I’m going to knitpick just a little bit. The first reading that are a couple of places where, at the end of your phrase, you went up instead of down. I have been told that, unless there’s a specific reason for going up at the end of a phrase, the natural tendency is to go down. The word ‘mind’ in the phrase keep this in mind and the word ‘you’ in the phrase keep this card with you. In the second reading I would put a little more emphasis on the word ‘and” just before the phrase about marijuana growers. Also, in my opinion, the phrase ‘heart and soul’ show be read together (the word heart has a bit of a space between it and the rest of the phrase). Otherwise, you did a good job! I could just hear some kind of nature background music playing when I listened to the second one. Hope this helps!
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October 31, 2022 at 6:08 pm #81200
adarn010
ParticipantThanks for your feedback, Dex. The tendency to go up instead of down at the end of a phrase has been also noted by my coaches soon after you posted this.I appreciate you taking the time to listen to my samples and providing me with your observations. Best of luck!
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October 3, 2022 at 3:45 pm #80497
RBenesVO
ParticipantGood Afternoon,
I’ve got one session left before I record my commercial demo and looking for final feedbacks please. Inflections, pitch, pacing. Thanks as always! Ryan
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October 4, 2022 at 6:12 pm #80538
Dexterius
ParticipantJust a quick note about the middle two demos. My wife and I both agree that there are two things about these: 1) You tend to be ‘singsongy’ and 2) You need to flow a little better. some spacing is fine, but it seemed to us kind of choppy. The first one was okay (a little singsongy, but I think it works with the demo). But the last one was beautiful! Hope this helps!!
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October 4, 2022 at 1:55 pm #80533
Cheechman
ParticipantWOW…you have a greeaattt voice!
I though all were spot on, great pacing and emotion in the reads.
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October 3, 2022 at 1:05 pm #80489
Dexterius
ParticipantHey Folks. Here is some homework for my next coaching session. Any feedback is greatly appreciated. Thank You! I went easy on the Irish accent on the second one. I did a recording with my normal voice, but my wife liked this one better.
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October 3, 2022 at 5:18 pm #80505
RBenesVO
ParticipantDexterius, I listened to both and you got a smile out of me with the fairies one! Accent came across well and I liked the delivery. The Jack Daniels had correct inflections are the right points. I think your audio may need a little work but that comes with time, equipment, and sound treatments, and you pry aren’t as worried about it on the forum as you would be with auditioning. Nice work.
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October 1, 2022 at 11:57 pm #80470
Madhatr673110
ParticipantHey Folks. Here is some homework for my next coaching session. Any feedback is greatly appreciated. Thank You!
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October 3, 2022 at 1:16 pm #80492
Dexterius
ParticipantHere are my thoughts on your performances:
Sandals: I think that there are two main issues 1) you need to speed it up just a little bit, and 2) I agree with Michael that the ‘wry smile’ mentality needs to be throughout your performance. I did like the smoothness of it, though.
Harvey Home Theatre: In this one, you need to bring down the tone to your normal register (too high), and I would recommend a slightly sarcastic attitude throughout this script. The script, in my opinion, lends itself to this kind of attitude. It will also make the reading more entertaining. Hope this helps!!! -
October 2, 2022 at 4:58 pm #80476
jliebert
Participant“Harvey Home Theater”. For your tone and pitch, think about the message you are delivering which is that electronics systems are typically so complicated that someone as sophisticated as a doctor can’t operate them, but here’s one simple enough for anyone to operate”. Your delivery sounds a bit unnatural, like maybe you are pushing your voice into a higher register. Try to imagine explaining this to an individual, like a friend.
“Sandals”: I like this one better. Again, try to imagine telling this to a friend, particularly in the first sentence, to add more naturalness. I agree with Michael above that “everything else is included” was my favorite part.
Hope this helps, and I should mention that I am not a coach, just someone like you learning, so take my feedback accordingly :).
Jeff
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October 2, 2022 at 12:36 am #80473
michaelflemingvoice
ParticipantWhat up, my dude. Listening to both, here are my recommendations. Take em or leave em 🙂
Sandals: Delivery is too slow. Pick up the pace a bit, and I think you’ll hit the sweet spot with the relaxed feel you’re trying to convey. The line “Because everything else is included” was your best moment on this one. I heard the wry smile coming through. Try to do that throughout.
Harvey Home Theatre: A few good moments on this one. I feel you might be trying too hard to be cool when you end your sentences on this one. Again, speed of delivery. Start is a little slow and then there’s some back and forth. “…he can even operate his…” is the meter and tone you want throughout. If you can match that everywhere, I think we’ve got a winner.
In general, relax. Be aware of how each sentence is ending the same and try to change it up a bit. When I started out, I sounded like I was trying too hard to act. I’m still having to overcome that at times, but the faster you can get your mind around imagining talking to a person and keeping their attention, the better this will click.
Keep up the good work!
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