Feedback Forum
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August 7, 2020 at 9:27 am #15468
David Goldberg
Edge Studio StaffHi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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This topic was modified 4 years, 9 months ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 years, 6 months ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 5 months, 3 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 5 months, 3 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 5 months, 3 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 5 months, 3 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 years, 9 months ago by
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November 23, 2022 at 8:48 pm #81856
jadethevo
ParticipantAnd another one! Practicing a friendlier read here. Found myself stumbling a bit on the alliterations, but I kept going as opposed to starting over within the same takes. Let me know if you have any feedback, particularly on glottal stops.
Thank you!
Script from the library:
At Freshii you can customize your entree and be your own culinary master. So what’s in your custom bowl? Tex Mex with black beans and a little salsa fresca? Teriyaki twist with a pop of pineapple? Whatever your fresh idea, get any 2 bowls for just $12.99! Freshii – Eat. Energize!
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November 25, 2022 at 6:46 pm #81887
aemanimate
ParticipantI really enjoyed Freshii 3! It all sounded like it was exciting and flowed. I would just change the ending Eat, Energize. Make the tone go lower on the end of energize for Freshii 3
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November 23, 2022 at 11:17 pm #81866
Luke V
ParticipantThese sound like they could be in a real commercial. All it’s missing is the music to go with it.
If you find yourself stumbling on alliterations, you should try incorporating tongue twisters in your vocal warm ups. It’s definitely helped me in the same regard.
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November 23, 2022 at 8:21 pm #81850
jadethevo
ParticipantHi all!
Here are a few practice takes for homework (these are all 22 seconds or less!). Looking for non-technical feedback, especially if you have any thoughts/concerns about glottal stops.
Thank you in advance
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November 29, 2022 at 2:39 pm #81985
LaurynM
ParticipantHi Jade, you have such a lovely voice! So smooth and clean. I love how smooth the 4th take is, but it’s almost a bit too fast, but might come in handy for specs that call for that type of sound and speed. I love the energy on take 5, but then it drops after the first phrase. Personally, I think take 3 is the strongest. It’s slower, but phrased nicely, and breaths are placed with intent and I can really start to see a picture of what the Breethe App does. Nice job. I think take 2 was a little combination of all takes, and therefore felt a bit choppy, but take 3 wins!! Nice work! Can’t wait to see more work from you 🙂
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November 22, 2022 at 7:35 pm #81834
nettipo1
ParticipantHello, I would love to get any kind of feedback you feel like giving me! Do you like or not like the POV that I chose, or the style I chose, or the sound quality – just anything that comes to mind. Thanks!~
Burt’s Bees
You asked me to define myself? What can I say? I’m complicated. I’m complex. I’m a boss. And beautiful. Im all these things and a million things more. The one thing I’m not? I’m not? I’m not synthetic. So why would I use beauty products that are? Introducing new Burt’s Bees Beauty. A full line of natural cosmetics that make you feel your beautiful best. Because of how they’re made. Not in spite of it. Burt’s Bees.Attachments:
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November 23, 2022 at 5:41 pm #81848
Grace17
ParticipantYou sounded authentic, like a real person, and playful which makes the read fun to listen to. But the tone you used for “boss” didn’t sound like you were confident in that. The first line, up until “beautiful” doesn’t sound confident enough to me. Complicated and complex are redundant. Also, I recommend reevaluating what words to hit. Hit the descriptive words(ex: “complex”) in phrases like “I’m complex” rather than the “i’m” part. And natural would benefit from being hit since that’s the main selling point of the product.
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November 21, 2022 at 7:09 pm #81813
Artist7
ParticipantHi,Everyone!
Would appreciate feedback on pace and whether my tone sounds conversational. Thanks in advance!
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November 22, 2022 at 7:42 pm #81836
nettipo1
ParticipantYou have a great voice – smooth, credible, pleasant. I liked both reads. The only thing that stood out to me on the 23 Women is the sentence where you said “23 Women is a story” and because you had a downward inflection after story (I’m guessing there was a comma right there?) it sounded like the end of a sentence, so try to ignore punctuation. I liked the tone of compassion in the Talk Listen, but I would say here also, try to ignore the commas, which are making you pause in the middle of your sentence. I bet you have the ability to deliver the emotional quality without the pauses. Good stuff!
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November 21, 2022 at 5:50 pm #81809
Hazaro
ParticipantLast commercial alt reads before coaching session today. (Realized I dropped “you” at the end of the first one :/) Appreciate the listens and feedback thus far. Thank you for your time!
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November 22, 2022 at 4:19 pm #81832
Grace17
ParticipantA pace in between these two would be best for most cases in my opinion. You don’t want to elongate words too much since if you were having a conversation, that would confuse the person and being too fast, the person would not process most of what you say. You have a very brief pause between each beat in the script and that’s very nice.
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November 21, 2022 at 3:29 pm #81796
Grace17
ParticipantPlease excuse the mic pops and i’m not looking for technical feedback but feedback on technique and believability as I’m about to record my narration demo. Thanks!
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November 24, 2022 at 12:55 am #81868
jadethevo
ParticipantGrace, you reads are mostly very clear! And yes, you do a great job of varying tone between your reads– wow! I am inspired by your ability to do so.
I think this is the biggest area of improvement that I can hear is in your “TH” sounds, they are closer to “D” sounds and it would be beneficial for you to enunciate more on these.
Here’s feedback on the individual reads:
Diabetes: Though the subject is “serious,” I found the use of this tone to be a bit too urgent/worrying/fear-inducing. I would recommend attempting a more straight-forward read. Also, the read of “so what should parents be looking for?”, maybe raise your intonation a bit at the end to make it clearer that this is a question.
Constellations: Very energetic! This would be so great for something educational for kids. It sounds VERY natural, like you’re talking to a group of kids on a field trip at a museum, love that. Again, the “TH” vs. “D” sound feedback stands. The first line of the read was a bit jumbled, too. Slow that line down a bit and make clearer distinctions between each word.
Crypto: I think you can place more emphasis on “cryptocurrency” here– “money word” as they say! Otherwise, great job of making distinctions between things you listed (“change, cheat, hack”)
Lamentation of Christ: I think you can actually slow down a little bit on this, but just slightly. Again, focus on pronouncing T’s fully. I think you also lost a bit of volume in your attempt to use a calmer, subtler tone. I like the tone and think it would be beneficial to attempt to replicate it at a higher volume.
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November 21, 2022 at 6:55 pm #81812
Grace17
ParticipantAlso, do you sense variety between the reads? Would you recommend more variety between them to market myself?
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November 20, 2022 at 7:50 pm #81773
Benn Pharr IV
ParticipantG’evening all. Here’s a couple uploads for my homework assignment. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.
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November 20, 2022 at 7:40 pm #81769
RoxyMel
ParticipantAppreciate all your feedback! Thank you!
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November 22, 2022 at 8:51 pm #81839
Hazaro
ParticipantI agree with nettipo1. This was a very engaging read and perfect for young listeners! As well as clear and nicely paced.
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November 22, 2022 at 7:55 pm #81838
nettipo1
ParticipantHi RoxyMel, I enjoyed your read! I don’t think I heard any extraneous pauses, and the delivery was upbeat and easy to follow. This script are your voice are perfect for the young listener audience. Well done.
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November 19, 2022 at 9:14 pm #81761
Jefftuttle
ParticipantHi, Everyone! I’m submitting a couple of practice reads for a homework assignment I’m working on. Any and all feedback is appreciated. Thank you!
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November 19, 2022 at 6:45 pm #81755
Hazaro
ParticipantWhere is everyone else’s posts?! Always feel self conscious when my homework starts monopolizing a page! LOL…just obsessively practicing commercial option reads. Sometimes it’s subtle and sometimes I push it further to flex this muscle. TV VO’s can trip me up as the visuals are there so I don’t want to go overboard, but then I feel it sounds flat so will have to work on that…it’s still helpful to know it all comes across to other ears. Feedback welcome. Thank you for listening!
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November 20, 2022 at 7:53 pm #81779
RoxyMel
ParticipantHi again! Okay, now that I listened to the last All-State one I noticed that you did add the expression at the beginning, and I like that!
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November 20, 2022 at 7:51 pm #81777
RoxyMel
ParticipantHi Hazaro. On the first All-State, once again I Love the quality of your voice. I really liked when you added in just a little more expression towards the end, and I would just say I think it would sound nice of you added some of that kind of expression towards the beginning as well. Great job 😉
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November 19, 2022 at 6:53 pm #81760
Hazaro
ParticipantSo the first Loews TV file wouldn’t upload for some reason and couldn’t delete the post so nothing to compare that one to. Ohhh…technology! :/
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