Feedback Forum
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August 7, 2020 at 9:27 am #15468
David Goldberg
Edge Studio StaffHi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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This topic was modified 4 years, 8 months ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 years, 5 months ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 years, 8 months ago by
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January 9, 2023 at 7:12 pm #82885
Eliz_10
ParticipantHi Terry,
I really like your pacing on Big-O tires. I understand the increase in volume with the line “Don’t wait any longer” but the volume seems to keep increasing rather than staying at the new level. Other than that, well done!
Regards,
Elizabeth-
January 9, 2023 at 7:37 pm #82887
Terry Davis
ParticipantThanks Elizabeth. I appreciate your feedback. I will try to keep an eye out for any changes in volume.
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January 9, 2023 at 4:04 pm #82869
Terry Davis
ParticipantHello All, I would love some feedback on this read for Big O tires. I am working on pacing, amongst many other things. If you could please give a quick listen and reply with some of your thoughts I would greatly appreciate it. Thanks!
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January 9, 2023 at 8:24 pm #82888
billmull
ParticipantThere’s a lot I like about this read such as the energy which is good. I can imagine hearing this as a radio commercial. I suggest, however, to keep working more in the direction of conversational since it sounds a bit like a 90’s announcer style voice over where you’re commanding the listener to do something.
Also, on a technical note, keep in mind that when you export a recording as an MP3 you’re getting a compressed version of the full digital recording. So you need to make sure that you leave some dead air at the very beginning and very end of the recording so that the vocal part of the recording doesn’t get cut off. The vocal got cut off at the very end of your audio file which is due to the fact that there was not sufficient dead air at the end of the recording.
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January 9, 2023 at 12:56 pm #82863
Eliz_10
ParticipantHi Jeff,
I liked both your Aena and Black Diamond reads I thought you captured the tone of a health advocate in the first demo and the sports enthusiast in the second. Any “criticism” I might have you already covered in your caveats. Good job! -
January 9, 2023 at 11:21 am #82861
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January 8, 2023 at 8:32 pm #82854
billmull
ParticipantHello,
Here are two more recordings I would love feedback on.
The audience for “teacher_change” is teachers. The voice seeker provided an audio example of the vocal style they are looking for which is a slow read with long pauses so this is what I was going for.
There was no direction for “world_voices”.
Thanks in advance.
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January 9, 2023 at 4:19 pm #82871
Terry Davis
ParticipantBill, good job on both of these reads. You have a good natural flow to the way you speak that sounds personable. For teacher, it’s hard to get an idea of what the voice seeker was going for by asking for a slow read. I think you followed the direction you were given but it seemed slow for my personal taste. I noticed a click sound or some other noise after “imagination” I believe. I was listening through computer speakers at a low volume so I’m sure a seasoned ear would pick that up on headphones. World voices once again showcased your conversational tone which is nice. I did pick up on a lot of “S” sounds throughout the read. I’m not sure if that is an equipment issue or you needing to pay a little more attention to your annunciation on certain words. Overall, great job.
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January 9, 2023 at 5:26 pm #82876
billmull
ParticipantI appreciate the feedback Terry.
Amazingly the sample audio from the voice seeker for the “teacher_change” script was actually slower than how I read. So I was actually concerned that the voice seeker will think I am speaking too fast. I too don’t understand why they want it so slow.
My home studio was recently evaluated by a sound engineer and he gave it very high marks so I can’t blame the clicks and “S’ sounds on the equipment. I made them myself. So it’s good that you brought these issues to my attention.
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January 9, 2023 at 7:01 pm #82883
Terry Davis
ParticipantBill, if you get a chance could you give me some feedback on my recordings? I submitted a couple late last month and 1 recently. I’d appreciate it. Thanks.
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January 8, 2023 at 2:32 pm #82843
swester
ParticipantGood Day! I’ve uploaded a narration for a travel video on the Mexican city of Guanajuato. I would appreciate your feedback on the read, thank you.
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January 9, 2023 at 5:40 pm #82878
jliebert
ParticipantHi! I listened a bunch of times to your recording. Here’s my 2 cents, and note that I’m not a coach…just a student at Edge in the midst of preparing my first Narration demo.
I love your smiling tone, particularly on the first sentence. You have a beautiful voice and it’s a nice clean recording. And I love Mexico, and really want to visit Guanajuato, so I was particularly attracted to your recording.
It sounds like you’re hitting a lot of words and syllables within words, it seems a little excessive and not as natural as it could be for that reason. For example, at the beginning, the word Guanajuato – sounds like you hitting “Guan” and “Jua”. Try just the first one, or hit the “Jua” with less gusto. For another example, listen to the sentence that begins “The 16th century…”, and note the number syllables you are hitting. Experiment with fewer hits and see if you like it.
Listen back for glottal stops. There are a lot of them here that you may want to smooth out or avoid.
Also a small thing, but your voice starts to fry when you say “built out of”. Not sure if that was intentional, but I think it would be better to avoid that.
Hope this helps,
Jeff
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January 7, 2023 at 5:20 pm #82833
jliebert
ParticipantHi All –
I’m uploading a few homework scripts. Appreciate any feedback you may have, in particular on pace, naturalness, and diction. Scripts are below.
Thank you!
JeffAetna/US Healthcare
No matter where we live–when it comes to something as important as health care, we all want the best. That’s why AETNA and US HEALTHCARE have joined forces to create a partnership that will set a new standard for quality and caring. AETNA and US HEALTHCARE. Raising a standard for your town, for your family, and for you.Black Diamond
Here at Black Diamond it’s all about climbing and skiing. We share the same experiences that you do on rock, ice and snow and these experiences push us to make the best gear possible for our worldwide family of climbers and skiers.
What began with a backyard anvil and a hammer has now grown into a global company with offices on three continents. Black Diamond is a company that’s not just for rock climbers and skiers, but one that stands for the spirit of the sports we live, their values and goals, past, present and future. Since 1957, our innovative gear designs have set the standard in numerous areas. This is partly the result of dedication, desire and diligence on the part of an incredible team of people. It’s also a product of the fact that each of us are climbers and skiers ourselves.Attachments:
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January 7, 2023 at 5:43 pm #82836
billmull
ParticipantAetna/US Healthcare: Your pace, naturalness, and diction are excellent! Very nice job.
Black Diamond: To be blunt, you sound like you’re reading. You also sound like you’re trying a bit too hard to sound excited which makes it sound not entirely believable. If you could figure out a way apply the same style you used for the Aetna/US Healthcare script to the Black Diamond script you would probably get the end result you want.
Best of luck.
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January 9, 2023 at 4:44 pm #82873
jliebert
ParticipantThank you Bill! I love blunt and honest feedback. It will help me improve. I was trying for a more excited tone in the Black Diamond script, and perhaps it came across as too unnatural, and I absolutely don’t want to sound as if I’m reading. I’m going to try it again, toned down a bit. If you (or anyone) has any commentary on the naturalness and flow of this take as compared to the original, i’d appreciate that.
The original version is “Take 1” and the new one is “Take 2”.
Thanks Bill and everyone,
JeffAttachments:
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January 9, 2023 at 5:37 pm #82877
billmull
ParticipantJeff,
I hope my initial feedback on Black_Diamond didn’t sound overly harsh. It’s just that when I heard the Aetna read I felt like I was hearing a very polished professional voice talent. I just didn’t feel that I was hearing the same natural quality when I listened to the initial black_diamond read. However, I think Black_diamond_2 is definitely moving in the right direction. It sounds more authentic, and you sound like believe what you’re saying. Awesome!
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January 10, 2023 at 1:34 pm #82900
jliebert
ParticipantNo that’s great…I welcome the criticism! Thank you.
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January 7, 2023 at 2:00 pm #82830
billmull
ParticipantHappy New Year!
I appreciate any feedback with a few caveats:
1) Please, no technical feedback.
2) I’m intentionally pausing between lines since the script is associated with a video which is moving between different kinds of images.
3) I’m aware that you can hear breathing between lines. I could have edited these out but chose not to.
4) Seafoam makes products for engines so I see the target audience as people who are into cars, trucks, boats, motorcycles, etc.Thanks
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January 9, 2023 at 9:39 pm #82893
TimberTykes
ParticipantHey there!
This was a good read! Everything was clear, and your voice is nice and descriptive- perfect for this reading, in my opinion.
I have only two things that I’m at odds with: I feel that with every second line (evening cruises, fishing until dark, etc.) lacks variance, or rather that each second line sounds like every other second line, if that makes sense? Like, the first line has a good buildup, and then the second one falls a little flat.
My second issue isn’t too much, but I feel that ‘Seafoam,’ as a money word, could be better emphasized.
Hopefully you’re able to understand where I’m coming from through my rambling. An enjoyable job, nonetheless!
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January 6, 2023 at 9:20 pm #82822
LiamS
ParticipantHello everyone, I have a read I’d love some feedback on. Please let me know if you hear any issues with pace and diction as well as anything else. Thank you.
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January 18, 2023 at 9:12 pm #83184
Earthbul
ParticipantIt’s not a race. Take some time to sell me on it. More inflection. You’ve got a nice voice. Use it to it’s full potential.
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January 6, 2023 at 10:31 pm #82825
ShellyMadison
ParticipantIt sounded like you did what I do which is start at my regular talking speed, then remember I should slow down. Your energy is great. I think slowing down would help with the small diction issues and let you find more flow between the phrases.
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January 6, 2023 at 11:58 am #82814
ShellyMadison
ParticipantA PSA and an ad for your feedback. Not looking for technical feedback. All other feedback welcome! Diction, conversational tone, glottal stops, pacing; hit me with it!
Thanks in advance.
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January 9, 2023 at 4:24 pm #82872
Terry Davis
ParticipantShelly, I really liked the Special K read. I could feel your smile coming through on that one. On both reads there was some breaths and glottal stops that could be taken away with editing. Pacing was really good for Special K. I think the pacing for Asthma could have been a bit faster. Overall great natural voice and good job.
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January 9, 2023 at 7:18 pm #82886
ShellyMadison
ParticipantThank you for the feedback!
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