[David Goldberg]

Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!

• This topic was modified 5 years ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 years, 10 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 9 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 9 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 9 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 9 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.

Topic

[vlwalinski]

Hi Everyone,

This is my first time posting to the Feedback Forum. I’m in the one-on-one coaching process for narration and commercials. I’m new to VO so any feedback on these two reads would be great! Thank you for your time!
-Veronica

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[Jaljr]

Hey, Veronica –

Welcome aboard! those were good reads, especially the Phonics . I agree that you should read that one with a big smile. You have a good voice. I look forward to hearing more.

JAL

[billmull]

Hi

Very nice for your first efforts on the feedback forum! (Also, welcome to VO!)

For both reads I suggest that you make sure to smile while reading. I suggest an especially big smile for HookedOnPhonics since its related to something for children.

Technically, keep in mind that when you export an audio file as an MP3 you are getting a compressed version of the full digital recording. So you need to make sure to leave about 2 seconds of dead air at the very start and very end of the original audio file. Otherwise either the very start or the very end of the speaking will get cut off in the MP3. This is what happened at the end of AmericanAirlines.

Keep up the good work.

[swester]

Good Afternoon – I’ve attached a piece I am working on for my narration reel. I would be appreciative of any type of feedback. Thanks so much.

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[Mike_Control]

Oh my gosh I love the way you annunciate ‘hundreds!’ I was hooked on the narration, but when you get to the ‘great for humans’ bit your narration could be more conversational. As a listener, I felt like you were reading a brochure rather than talking to me about the migration.

[Earthbul]

I agree with Mike. I’d love to hear this one redone with those critiques in mind. I think you’re going to hit it out of the park !

[swester]

Thank you so much for the feedback!

[dejapowell]

Hello Everyone,

Happy New Year! This is my first time participating in the forum, and I am really excited to get started. I have uploaded two recordings, and would love some feedback. I recorded them on my phone, so please keep the feedback centered around the content and not the quality 🙂

I am currently working on my speed and diction, here are a couple of questions I would appreciate you answering:

-How is my pace?
-Can you understand me clearly?
-How is my diction?
-Does my read sound conversational?

Thank you so much for your time! I look forward to your feedback.

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[billmull]

Hello,

I give you high marks on pace, diction, and conversational style for both reads.

For recording2 I suggest that when you get to the punchline to go a bit more over the top to accentuate the joke (because it’s a good one).

I understand that you recorded these on your phone, but the muffled quality of the sound does make it hard to clearly hear your voice and evaluate your speaking as much as would be ideal. So if there is a way that in the future you could find another way to record your speaking that may be a good idea.

[Earthbul]

Hi,
I felt the pacing was a little more fluid on the first read. The second read not so much. I felt your diction was fine on both although the audio felt muffled. I also felt that the first read sounded more conversational. I enjoy the sound of your voice.

[AlexS]

Hello VO Colleagues, and Belated HNY to you! May much success (and good health) characterize your ’23. Stylistic and Technical feedback welcome on this “Nike No Limit” recording. No direction given–just a link to a video with a staccato of athletic visuals echoing the copy. Your typical, iconic Nike intensity and aspiration. Thank you!

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[swester]

Hi ALex, There are a lot of short phrases and action words in this copy. I thought you did a good job of varying pitch while going through them. About 5 seconds in, I think you say ‘through sunrise’ or ‘through some highs’, so you might want to work on that piece, but otherwise, it was pretty good. Keep it up!

[Debbie]

I’m working on being more conversational for narration and tutorials. No technical notes please, but any other feedback is appreciated!

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[dejapowell]

Hi Debbie, I am currently working on being more converational as well. One thing that my coach is helping me with is speed. I think that your pace is a little quick, slowing down a bit may help a bit.

Good luck!

[Earthbul]

Re-Posting Planet Earth’s “Grasslands” due to faulty editing.
Don’t drink and edit folks LOL

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[AlexS]

Hi, Earthbul. Man, your timbre is enviable for this type of copy. I think if you address just a couple of issues, I’m ready to tune into this nature special: (1) I hear several clicks and some juiciness in your narration–edit these out for smoothness or try another take with these mouth-noises in mind; and (2) I believe if you slow your pace down a bit to allow me to absorb the visuals of your narration (and images that would be on screen) that would make your good read greater. Well done! Best, Alex

[Earthbul]

I fully agree on the mouth noise. Hoped the music would distract from it in earlier versions lol I also feel the pauses should be longer in spots. I enjoy narration but I’m more comfortable with an upbeat commercial read. As for audio, I’m always tinkering with audacity settings to find the sweet spot. Thanks again for your take on it. I appreciate it.

[Nikka Kowidge]

Hello fellow, VO actors! I’m looking for feedback on the following practice read. I’m looking to sound conversational and reduce my glottal stops. Thoughts? Any and all feedback minus the technical appreciated! Thank you all so much.

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[weiss-richmond]

Hi Nikka, I really appreciate the energy you’re bringing to this read and can tell you connect with the material. I think picturing a particular person and really speaking to them might help you with being conversational. With regard to glottal stops, one trick I learned a long time ago in a theatre context is to put a teeny ‘h’ before the vowel, just to get your air moving. Full disclosure: I’m a newbie to the world of VO and I have no idea whether the pros would agree with me — that might be something that microphones would too easily catch. But, could be worth a try! -Hondo

[Nikka Kowidge]

Thank you so much for this feedback! I really appreciate it.

[Earthbul]

Planet Earth “Grasslands”

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[SuperLuke]

Hello,
Feedback about this commercial I am practicing for would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks,
-Luke

Copy:
Which iPhone is right for you? Welcome the ultimate iPhone 14. From $999, a total powerhouse. From $799, as amazing as ever. From $599, serious value. iPhone 14. Love the power. Love the price.

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[Earthbul]

Great breath control. I felt that after the strong opening line that the second line should have had a more subdued delivery.
Overall I thought the pacing and energy was spot on. Nice job.

[Earthbul]

Any and all feedback is welcomed and appreciated. Thanks !

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[SuperLuke]

When you say, “There are guys who will smirk at you”, at the beginning of the copy, I think if you put more emphasis and power into the word “There are guys”, the rest of your recording will flow smoothly. Think about how the listener of this commercial will feel, hearing the build-up and the importance of what you have to say in this recording. Everything else flowed just fine =)

[Earthbul]

I totally hear what your saying. And saying it again out loud really reinforces it. Thanks for the feedback, Luke !!

[Author]

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