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  • #85425
    Bruce Kramer
    Participant

    Hi Forum Folks,
    I am dipping my toe into commercials. Does this make you hungry? Comments welcome.
    Thanks

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    • #85781
      RCampos
      Participant

      OK, Bruce, I am pretty anti-sugar these days, but you did make me think about cinnamon squares! The playfulness of this read is very fun – nice range. A couple of small suggestions: I would recommend spacing out the nacht, nuit, noche – ever so slightly, just to give the listener a bit more time to absorb them. And, very minor, but I think you rushed “the night” at the end of “it is the night.” Since “night” is a major theme here, I think it could use a little extra emphasis.

    • #85436
      ajcarste
      Participant

      Hello Bruce,
      The reading has a nice tone. I hear it going in and out though. I think it might be stronger if the volume was constant.
      I hope this helps,
      Andrew

  • #85390
    monibr16
    Participant

    Hello everyone! This is a script I’m using for my demo. Feed back on style and story, maybe flow, is what im needing to focus on. Not so much the mic and such. Help is so welcome.

    Olay Ultra moisture Body Wash 
    Having dry skin is a struggle. Turns out my body wash was the problem. Until I tried Olay body which improves skin three times  better than the leading body wash. Better skin from a body wash? You better believe it. With Olay Body.

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    • #85495
      Toque
      Participant

      Love it Monika! Good read all-around. T

      • #85526
        monibr16
        Participant

        Thank you Toque, and thank you for listening!

    • #85446
      mlewis327
      Participant

      Very natural pace and tone. Can’t find much to nit pick. I might put a bit more emphasis on “body” at the close.

      • #85525
        monibr16
        Participant

        Nice catch, thank you Mlewis327

    • #85437
      ajcarste
      Participant

      Hello monibr16,
      I think the reading is very familiar. I’m curious to learn more about the solution when you say “problem” … When you say the Olay body for the first time I think it could be a little bit more sure about the fact you found the solution, but the looseness doesn’t need to go.

      I hope this helps,
      Andrew

      • #85524
        monibr16
        Participant

        Thank you Andrew that actually helps a lot!

  • #85371
    T Hayes
    Participant

    Hello, previous feedback noted some mouth clicks in my readings. Curious if that is something you hear. And feedback on the pace would be appreciated. Acutally, any feedback is appreciated. Thanks!

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    • #85447
      mlewis327
      Participant

      Very clear delivery and upbeat. I agree with the other reviewer that you might improve it with a little faster pace, perhaps connecting your sentences like in conversational speech.

      • #85488
        T Hayes
        Participant

        Thank you for the honest feedback. I appreciate it!

    • #85380
      M
      Participant

      Hi T. Ohhh to wake up tomorrow to tacos for breakfast…! I lived in Austin and still visit several times a year so this read hit home! I have a hard time identifying the “clicks” I hear so much about, so I will pass on that critique, but the rest of the piece was articulated well and gave the listener an array of the city’s offerings via a colorful delivery. Consider picking up the pace and/or fluctuating the pace so that it too reflects the amazing diversity and flavor of that special town. If you can imagine you telling this “story” to someone who has never been there before who you think would really LOVE it if you could just convince them to visit! That exercise might draw out some of the passion that could really take this great read to the next level. Just some thoughts from a cowgirl!

      • #85404
        T Hayes
        Participant

        M- thank you for the feedback. Very helpful! I know I need to work on making up a story in my head prior to my reading- work on that ole imagination! I may try this one again with your suggestions in mind. I have never visited Austin, but this makes me want to. 🙂 Thanks again!

        • #85457
          Brandyhart610
          Participant

          Hi! I think you could speed up a bit to make it more conversational, but I know why you didn’t (you were working on the mouth clicks). Otherwise it was super clear and easy to understand.

        • #85489
          T Hayes
          Participant

          Thanks Brandy!

  • #85333
    Brandyhart610
    Participant

    Newbie here. Moving into coaching – first session with my coach is next week. Here are 2 of the 3 scripts I have prepared. Any feedback is appreciated:)

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    • #85367
      T Hayes
      Participant

      Brandy, these were great! Your tone and delivery were very solid for both of these. Your voice is very unique and interesting to listen to. I am struggling with a point to work on. 🙂 Great job! I am very new to voiceover also. Good luck to you as you start this voice-over journey!!

      • #85458
        Brandyhart610
        Participant

        Thank you T. Good luck to you as well!

    • #85337
      M
      Participant

      Hi Brandy. Really great job with both the scripts. There was a wide variety of tone and pace which kept it interesting and engaging. Not much to suggest for improvement except perhaps articulating the end of one word into the the start of the next (e.g., “dogs would walk themselvesaaand algebra…” ; “there’sgottabeone…”). Great story telling and solid delivery.

  • #85300
    DanielButtrey
    Participant

    My rendition of the NASA script on voices, let me know what you guys think

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    • #85452
      mlewis327
      Participant

      Daniel, As Ms. Hayes said, you have a great voice and tone. She is right about the pace of delivery. You could slow it a bit in places to even out the pace. Don’t rush in the longer sentences, keep it balanced. Very good sound.

    • #85368
      T Hayes
      Participant

      Daniel, your tone is perfect for this topic. Your voice is smooth and easy to listen to. My one suggestion would be to slow the pace down just a little. Overall, great job!!

  • #85290
    M
    Participant

    Hi all!. I’m a newbie. I have attached three different reads of the same piece. I am fiddling around with different audience/delivery and not sure how each lands. Any preference? Is one more appealing than the others? Honest,frank feedback appreciated. Thank you!

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    • #85369
      T Hayes
      Participant

      M – I thought all three sounded great. Your voice has a clear, easy to listen-to tone. I think they could each be used for a different audience. I am curious if when you recorded you were thinking of a different audience as you read. Great work!

      • #85382
        M
        Participant

        Hi T. Thank you for listening and for the comments. Yes, I did try and conjure up a different audience – e.g., in #2, I was thinking of a child down on him or herself who needed an encouraging, yet gently stern, pep talk to get back in the “game” with some confidence. I am learning that I need to change my perspective/POV to get myself out of a redundant rut and try on a new sound.

        Thanks for the input.

    • #85307
      Michele Martin
      Participant

      Hi M! I thought all 3 reads sounded great, but my favorite was the last one. I think the slightly quicker pace and less drawn out words sounded like the best fit for the script, but am not sure if this might just be a subjective preference and not a correct or incorrect kind of thing. You have a nice sound 🙂

      • #85309
        M
        Participant

        Thank you, Michelle. I appreciate you taking the time to listen and reply. Your comments are helpful! I think sometimes, I feel like slowing down allows for greater articulation and that is not always need or the case! thanks!

  • #85248
    Toque
    Participant

    Hi all. I went through the demo program a couple of years ago. Started actively auditioning on Voices.com in May 2021, and was lucky enough to get a bunch of auditions short-listed, and actually booked a (very small) character job for an online ad in June 2021. Shortly after I finished that job, we experienced a few life changes that took me away from voiceover. But now we’re relocated and ettled, and I just finished putting together my new booth and am starting to tweak it and audition again. I would really appreciate any feedback you can provide (full spectrum: booth sound; performance; diction, etc.) Looking forward to getting back at it, including participating on here again! Thanks for your feedback! T

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    • #85275
      DanielButtrey
      Participant

      Would you mind if I posted my own read of this script on here? I would enjoy getting your feedback.

    • #85273
      DanielButtrey
      Participant

      I auditioned for the same job on Voices. I listened to your rendition about 5 times now. Your audio quality is very good, all I hear is you. And you sound great. Articulation is top notch and the pacing sounds good as well.
      I can only imagine that out of the current 229 auditions for this piece that there are a few that stand out in other ways that I would love to know about. The voice they thought of when they posted this has to have made itself available at this point.
      I don’t really have any critique of you other than it maybe doesn’t sound very conversational. But then again the audition calls for genuine and articulate which is what you’ve presented.
      Long story short, you’re back in the game and your recording space sounds great! Keep it up!

      • #85295
        Toque
        Participant

        Thanks so much for your feedback Daniel! And no, I don’t mind at all if you post your own read of that script.

  • #85237
    T Hayes
    Participant

    Very new to all of this. Any feedback is wanted and appreciated. Thank you ahead of time.

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    • #85274
      DanielButtrey
      Participant

      Was this done in one take? It certainly sounds like it 😄. I honestly wish I could do a one take read but it usually takes me several.
      There was a point where I heard mouth clicks. It was at the 6 second mark. These are hard to get rid of and I struggle with them myself.
      Your articulation is great, every word is a it should be. Especially for an English learning piece.

      • #85310
        T Hayes
        Participant

        Thank you for the feedback Daniel! I appreciate the note on mouth clicks. I am pretty new to all of this so, I am still training my ears and learning what I need to listen for in my recordings. I am sure I am probably not hydrated enough. Much appreciated!!

    • #85265
      Toque
      Participant

      Hi T. I think both your reads are very good. Nice clear voice and diction, and good pace, especially for these kinds of educational reads. The only one small thing I thought I may have noticed was a tiny bit of mouth noise in a few spots (little “clicks” or “smacks” that our mouths can make). I think it happens to all of us. I try to stay hydrated, and also often eat green apple prior to a recording, as it can reduce those sounds. I understand there’s even a green apple spray you can buy, though I’ve never tried it. I still spend a fair bit of time trying to edit the clicks/smacks out. In my DAW, I identify them, clip them out and replace them with a bit of background booth sound that I’ve recorded. Overall though, excellent work! Hope this is of some help. T

      • #85370
        T Hayes
        Participant

        Toque, thank you for the feedback! I am still new and learning what to listen for in my readings. I appreciated the tips!

  • #85211
    T Hayes
    Participant

    This is my very first share on the forum. I would appreciate any feedback! Thank you so much !!

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    • #85221
      M
      Participant

      Hello T! Great job! I too recently posted my first read and felt all of the vulnerability that step brought on! I heard a nice smooth, controlled voice with a good pace for this type of read. Maybe add a tad bit more emphasis to the words “inspired,” “danger,”conflict and “struggle.” They have a built in meaning that allows for a strong delivery. The last word “here” conveys the impression that you are continuing speaking – maybe a falling intonation would suggest that you are actually pointing at the picture…? Just some thoughts, but a really great job!! High-five to the Firsters; we deserve a “10!”

      • #85236
        T Hayes
        Participant

        Thanks for the feedback! The points you made were actually some things I thought about as I relistened to it. The falling intonation at the end specifically. Good luck to you on this journey. I will be on the lookout for some of your postings to give some feedback. 🙂

  • #85192
    Luke V
    Participant

    Hey. It’s been a while since I uploaded, but here we go. Please let me know what you truly think, however honest you can be within in the confines of the rules because I think I really need to step out of my comfort zone. Thank you in advance.

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    • #85251
      Michele Martin
      Participant

      Hi Luke- nice job! I like the way you altered your tone to fit each of your reads. In the Quality Inn script, it sounded like you emphasized “He” before Mr. Simmons and before Bob; I’m wondering if the emphasis might be better placed on Mr. Simmons and Just Plain Bob as opposed to “He”. Thanks for sharing your reads! Michele

    • #85245
      BJ
      Participant

      Hi Luke – Good for you for stepping out of your comfort zone! I think you’re in good company here as I know I feel exactly the same way.

      Acura – I like the warmth of your tone. Given the brand, the desire for a dramatic read is understandable. However, consider trying to read this without the pauses.

      Discovery – Your warmth and friendliness shines here. I’m not sure if it’s the recording, but I may be hearing sibilant “s”s on “stinks,” “skunk” and “kids.”

      Quality Inn – I like your pacing here. The word “We’ll” got swallowed a bit.

      Looking forward to your next Post,

      BJ

    • #85242
      M
      Participant

      Hi Luke! Nice job. My suggestion for Quality Inn would be to lighten the tone a little – more upbeat – and perhaps insert an overly emphasized formality to the name “Mr. Simons” to contrast with the casual “Bob”

      Good job!

    • #85214
      T Hayes
      Participant

      Luke V – On each of your three recordings, I think you did a nice job of changing your tone and delivery to appropriately fit the expected audience. My one area of feedback would be to make sure to emphasize the “t” sound at the end of words. I was sometimes not able to hear that sound.

      • #85271
        Luke V
        Participant

        Thank you all so much for the feedback. I think I’ll need to do a lot more homework beyond script analysis and reading, but I’ll definitely finish my next recordings with your feedback in mind and I hope it shows.

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