Feedback Forum
- This topic has 10,053 replies, 728 voices, and was last updated 5 days, 6 hours ago by
.
-
Topic
-
Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
-
Replies
-
I’d love a little help on my homework/some feedback if anyone has a few moments to spare!
Thanks all!
Annella
-
Hi Anella, I think you capture very effectively the tone of a corporate in-house read. (I’ve listened to tons of those). I have just a few notes:
1. :08 future “together” – the “er” sounds like it’s coming from he back of your mouth, which skews a little younger than I would expect from a company voice over. So, I’d say practice and listen to this word ending and try saying it more from the front of your mouth and see if you prefer that difference.
2. I think you start with a good sense of the company’s conviction – and you end on a strong note. But in the middle between about :31 and :42, you seem to lose that focus a bit. I think this is where the VO is really building, and you need to sustain the sense of mission. This is a challenge, because they’re talking about being the greatest company in history.That’s it, and if you have a moment, please take a listen and send me your thoughts on my Volcano VO – just posted. Wishing you all the best,
Robert
-
-
-
Hey Graceson,
I like this read a lot. Selling me on the intuition (even though I use razor blades). Couple of notes: Soap opera is obviously an important play on words here. I hear an ever so slight glottal stop between soap and opera, and I think this would sound better if you ran those words together. Your inflection is great throughout, like at :12 “You’ll never” – and at the end, “shaving’s never been so simple.” If you have a moment, I would welcome your comments on the Volcano VO I just posted. Thank you!
Robert -
-
-
-
-
Hi Michele,
I think the Tilex VO is very nice. I have one suggestion. Sometimes you can look at these VO’s like a piece of music. In your Tilex VO, you hit very close to the same note at :14 – “reach” – and at about :24 “roots.” If you vary the pitch of these, I think the VO will sound more varied overall. On the Jack Daniels, I agree with Graceson that you may have slowed down a little too much. The script is going for a slower country feel, and in fact, if there was music and imagery, your pace might fit perfectly – but without those, you probably want to pause a little less. If you have a moment, I’d be very grateful for your thoughts on my Volcano VO – just posted today. Thank you!
Robert-
Thank you Robert! I appreciated your tip to think of the script as a piece of music and the specifics you provided in your feedback. I think visualizing scripts in that way is going to be a nice help to me! If I were to re-submit these reads, I’d definitely pick up the pace on them and decrease the pauses. Really appreciate the time you took to listen and provide your thoughts. I commented on volcano, but my apologies, I think I wrote to Graceon instead of replying directly to you. I tried to edit it but am not seeing my edited version appearing.
-
-
Good work overall! I would pick up the pace on both just a bit. There were a few long pauses in between sentences that could be shortened a bit. The tilex script needed a bit more variation with each sentence. For example the “u**y nasty mold stain” sentence could really get that “Yuck!” tone in your voice to spice up the read. You have a wonderful voice though. Keep up the good work!
-
-
-
Hi all! I am just getting started on my journey and need some honest feedback to help me improve.
Thank you in advance!
-
Hi! Welcome to the forum! Just my 2 cents: your reads need to be smoothed out. There was a lot of pauses throughout the read. You’ll definitely want to smooth those out to sound nice and natural. Make sure you sound like you are talking rather than reading as it will make your script sound much better. I would try reading some books or articles and just focus on reading smoothly without those long pauses. Good luck on your journey I wish you well!
-
-
Hello! Thank you so much for previous feedback! I’m working towards my commercial demo. Here are two sample reads. I appreciate any feedback you would like to provide. Thanks again!
-
Nikka, Great voice and tone. In the Dupixent ad, I felt your pronunciation of “Dupixent” was a bit harsh. A smoother pronunciation to make it more appealing would be my suggestion. Of course, the advertiser will be listening for that too. The second ad for Loreal seemed more natural. The tone and pace are good. In the phase, “the original brush separates every lash,” I would read “lash” more smoothly. I might also emphasize a bit more the phrase “American’s number one masacara.” Overall, I hear your voice and delivery as very good, but would be even better by smoothing out words that you emphasize.
-
-
-
Hi All,
Here’s two more commercial practice reads. I welcome any and all feedback! Thanks in advance.
-
-
Hi! I would love some feedback on these two narration reads: one is corporate explainer and one is documentary. Thanks so much!
-
-
Hey Talia, loved your voice on both reads, as they both sound very welcoming and engaging throughout. I was expecting the documentary to sound a little more low energy than the explainer, but the way you read it also sounded phenomenal.
The only thing that stood out to me as odd was in the explainer read. Toward the end, it sounded like there was an awkward pause between “Select the” and “Add a new account…”
-
-
-
It has been some time but I finally got done editing the latest reads. Both Narration and Commercial. Please listen and give feedback please, Thank you.
-
I like your voice Dillon- clear and easy to listen to. I agree with the other commenter to just slow down a touch on “ESPN” so that each letter is clearly enunciated. Sounds great!
-
-
Hi! I think you sounded great on your reads. As for the ESPN read I would slow down when you say the word “ESPN.” It was a little rushed and crammed together as you read over it, remember the brand name should be all nice and pretty when you go through the read. I would also say the same for your Creativity read. Overall it was a good read with a nice pace, but the word “creativity” was ran through too fast. Slow down just a bit and I think you’ll do great!
-
-
Hi Forum Friends –
A big thank you to everyone participating in this Forum. I learn so much each time I listen to your Posts and read your feedback.
Would you weigh in on my reads? Are you hearing any difference between each of the Trader Joe’s/ TJ’s reads? How about the Asthma and Allergy Foundation of America/AAFA reads? Any and all feedback is appreciated.
BJ
-
Also, I just realized I hadn’t answered your specific question regarding whether a difference between the TJ’s reads was noticed. I liked the overall sound of your voice on the v2 one- felt a little “lighter” and more cheerful to me. The first comment I left on this thread was in reference to the initial version of the Trader Joe’s script. Just FYI 🙂
-
Hi BJ- I thought the Allergy and Asthma Foundation read was spot on. Your voice has a knowledgeable and trustworthy sound to me, like a smart and warm doctor with appealing bedside manner. I especially enjoy how you utilize emphasis, pitch and tone in all your reads. It seems like you have an intuitive sense of what needs to be emphasized without it feeling like you’re trying too hard, and your placement always feels just right to me. Only edit tweek I might consider would be to reduce certain pauses. I noticed one before “and” somewhere and in another spot I don’t recall without listening again, but that’s it!
-
Hi BJ! On Trader Joe’s, I loved “Who wants to wait that long? Not you” It gave me a chuckle. I thought you did a perfect job infusing it with a hint of humor and familiarity and I enjoyed your interpretation of the entire script: pace, tone, emphasis and intonation felt just right to me, with nothing under or overdone IMO. The only observation I have that might or might not be “accurate” (I sometimes can’t tell if some things are subjective, personal preferences and not “right or wrong”), is that the read felt just a tiny bit tense or formal, as if you were preforming it- for example on a theatre stage instead for a movie, if that makes sense. Subtle and maybe not an accurate observation on my part. I’d be curious if you or others get that vibe or perhaps not.
-
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
