[David Goldberg]

Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!

• This topic was modified 4 years, 7 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 years, 4 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 3 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 3 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 3 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 3 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.

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[vlwalinski]

Hi Edge Studio Friends,

Attached are two reads for my VO homework:-)…a medical narration and a narration. Would love to hear your thoughts. Thank you!
-Veronica

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[Erika S]

Your medical narration sounds great! Your enunciation of Phytophotodermatitis is very nice and your voice fits this script well.Great read!

[DanielButtrey]

Your reads sound great, your voice sounds like it was meant to do these scripts. My only critique is that it does sound like you may be a bit too close to your mic? I’m hearing plosives and a bit of mouth noise. Your pace is spot on, not too fast and not too slow. Overall great read

[vlwalinski]

Thank you taking the time to give me your feedback Daniel!!! I will fix those technical issues:-)

[Artist7]

Hello! I would appreciate some feedback on these two commercial practice reads. Thanks in advance!

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[vlwalinski]

Hi Artist7,
I love your energy in the Food Network recording. Your voice is smooth, fluid and clear with nice tone. I would add more energy to the NPR recording, especially toward the end. Both are very well done! -Veronica

[Artist7]

Thanks, Veronica-much appreciated!!

[M]

Hello Forum Friends. I am narrowing down samples for an upcoming narration demo. I would appreciate a n y input – no need to sugar coat! I am eager for ideas on how to improve, what lands funny, awkward, forced or unnatural and basically, if I am conveying a story with the ever-important “conversational” tone. Thank you so so much!

And one other thing, the energy should be increasing slightly with each read (“Guns Germs and Steel” being the most mild of the three, “Bonobos” with a bit ore energy and “Sun” with the most of the three but still somewhat mild.)

Thank YOU!

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[Luke V]

Hey M. I’ve listened to your recordings and I really like the careful tone you placed within them. I can’t speak to narration as my focus is on commercial, but I noticed the slight increases in energy you mentioned and I think they work wonderfully. They’re apparent enough for the listener, but subtle enough to avoid drastically changing the consistency and tempo of your reads. Awesome job!

[M]

Hi Luke. Thank you for taking the time to listen and reply. I really appreciate the input!

[Luke V]

Hey guys. I’m back with another round of recordings. Thank you in advance for your wonderful feedback.

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[M]

Hi Luke! American Express was definitely my favorite of the three. It seemed like a good length with a definite start middle and finish that suited your voice and diction; and, your choice of pace was spot on. I’d like to hear more of that style!

iPhone: I had to rewind a couple of times to determine the words “voice activation” and “driver’s seat” so perhaps take a little more time with those word pairs and articulate the end of one and the beginning of the other – that would help the flow of the read for me.

Rock: Along the aforementioned lines, I got a little bogged down with “bands your” – slowing down a smidge and changing “bandzyer ex” to “bands your (rhymes with “store”) ex” would keep it moving without s mental hiccup.

Great job – for me those minor adjustments would take it to the next level.

[Luke V]

Thank you so much. I also sent my recordings to my singing teacher and she pointed out the exact same things as you have. She and I spent some time working on it together, so I hope it shows the next time I upload. Thanks again.

[Graceson]

Hi all! Just dropping this here. I haven’t fixed the echo in my room yet so please excuse.

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[BJ]

Hi – Nice warmth in your voice. I like your pacing and inflection. Just a couple of thoughts – consider trying this with a little more of a smile in your voice and playing up the conversational approach (picture who you’re taking with about A-1) – feel free to lean into that “delicious.” Looking forward to hearing more from you.

[dhwilson2]

these are my first 2 attempts at medical narration. please be kind while also specific. 🙂
One is a “explainer” piece on multiple myeloma.
The other is a “propaganda” piece from a nationwide cancer provider

Trying for two different tones

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[HillOKeefe]

Hi dhwilson2! You have a very interesting sound! What stood out to me immediately was mouth clicks and a low frequency hum. The clicks can be fixed with proper hydration. The hum can be removed with a program like iZotope RX (Just google the stand alone or plug in option for tutorials). You may also want to shoot for crisper/clearer enunciation. Keep going, you’re headed in a great direction!

[dhwilson2]

HillOKeefe—thank you for thanking the time to listen to my reads. More importantly, thank you for the very detailed information on specifics of my voice and how to fix them.
Thank you. You’re va very kind person. 🙂

[dhwilson2]

these are my first 2 attempts at medical narration. please be kind while also specific. 🙂
One is a “explainer” piece on multiple myeloma–technical.
The other is a positive outlook on the future of cancer Tx.

Trying for two different tones

[DillonP]

I got two new reads both Commercial and Narration. And they both have an positive tone. Please give feedback, as it would help me improve on my reads and VO success.

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[BJ]

Hi – Nice, friendly, warm tone. Lion King – Some words get a bit lost when speaking quickly. Are the last two words “one half” intended to be part of this read? Fish Boil – Conjure up who you are talking to for a more conversational read and to help you vary your delivery style. Looking forward to listening to you again.

[RCampos]

Hi VO Friends,
I’m very grateful for all the helpful feedback I’ve been getting from you. Here’s a new one. Working on connecting with the material. Would appreciate your thoughts. Thank you!
Robert

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[M]

Hello rcampos: Great job capturing the playful sarcasm of Carl – perfect! You have a wonderfully smooth voice and calming tone. My suggestion for this read is to pick up the energy to reflect the enthusiasm and eagerness these late-teens must be feeling at (perhaps) their first shot at independence and adulthood.

I noted additional breaths after “dreams” “rules” “conduct” “Carl” and “but” which interrupted the flow. Obviously you have to breath, but perhaps assign where is the most efficient and natural spot to do so so that you keep it moving.

The music I would change or lose; it sets a mood for me that doesn’t encapsulate the youthful energy this time of life epitomizes.

You c l e a r l y have the skills and the voice so take my comments with a grain of salt.

[RCampos]

Hi M, Thank you so much for your thoughtful feedback! I appreciate your take on it and welcome your thoughts. I do think I can do better at reflecting the energy and enthusiasm of this particular VO, and I’ll work on the breaths as well. Wishing you all the best, Robert

[T Hayes]

Hello everyone! Would appreciate feedback on these two reads. Curious about how my acting is. Are my voice and character appropriate for each read? Would love any feedback. Thanks!

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[RCampos]

Hi T Hayes,
Nice job on these. In terms of acting, you show good range here – the VOs call for dramatically different reads and you deliver that well. In Candy – the very beginning sounds like you’re a little further away from the mike. When you get closer, I hear a fuller sound. At :12 I think you could add a bit more emphasis to the title of the program: Making Candy – so that it’s clear this is the name of the show. At :18 it sounds to me like you say “He-you,” instead of “you.” Was that deliberate? In Relaxation, you have an exhale at :02, which seems out of place unless you’re telling people to “breathe out.” I think you effectively capture the meditative tone of this throughout. Very nice work!
Robert

[Renita]

I agree. Nice reads. I really like your sound on “Relaxation.” I will pass on a tip I learned recently that I plan to implement; If the script/topic is not interesting to me when I read it to myself, others will not be interested when you deliver it. This may help “Making-Candy” sound less like you are reading the script. Overall, nice job.

[DillonP]

They are both good reads for sure. As for the Making Candy I think you should pick up the pace on it. It seems more of a commercial than narration, other than that the diction was great on your part.

[RCampos]

Hi Gang,
I would really appreciate your thoughts on this VO. I’m working on varying my tone and smoothing out my read. Welcome your suggestions.
Thank you!
Robert

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[CMcHugh]

Hi RCampos, first off I wanted to thank you for the feedback you provided, I really appreciate it. For your read I thought you sounded great, it had a good energy throughout, the only thing I would say is for the transition between “He’s back” and “Each year” is to add a slightly longer pause as you switch between the flows of the read.

[Renita]

Hi Robert,
I like the tone of your voice and enjoyed the reads. I agree with the comments already made. Let your voice match the music’s energy and the message’s sentiments. Keep up the good work!

[RCampos]

Thanks very much, Renita. I’ll work on that. I think I tend to have a laid back California way of speaking. I need to figure out how to bring more energy when it’s needed. Appreciate your thoughts!
Robert

[Artist7]

Hi, RCampos!The read was very good! Just a couple of suggestions: “He’s taking salsa lessons as a surprise for his wife” needs to be smoothed out a bit, as it sounds like you’re reading the script. Would also suggest delivering “He’s back!” with a bit more enthusiasm (sounds like the script itself is about relief from back pain?) Also, if this is one continuous script, would recommend using the same background music throughout…..almost sounds like two separate reads. Hope this helps!

[RCampos]

Thanks very much for your notes, Artist7. I think I’ll try memorizing my next script and see if I can shed the sound of “reading.” My background is in documentaries and news (writing/producing, not voicing), so I think I need to break some old modes and ramp up the enthusiasm when the script calls for it. I will also take another look at the music and see if I can make one piece work throughout. Appreciate your time!
Robert

[T Hayes]

Hi Robert,

I thought your tone and pace went well with the different sections of this read. My one suggestion would be to pick up the excitement and pace a little on the salsa section. Good luck to you!

[RCampos]

Hi T Hayes, Thanks very much for your suggestion. I just listened to it again and agree with you. I’ll work on bringing more of the excitement and pace in that section. Appreciate your help.

[JDM_VO]

Overall, clear and relaxed read, which is good! If I were to offer one piece of advice, try relishing the script more, and let something unexpected and more spontaneous come through. The words, while feeling relaxed enough, seem to still flow too steadily, removing the potential for further emotional impact and connection. I struggle with this too!

Keep up the good work,

Justin M.

[RCampos]

Hi JDM, interesting advice that I had not heard before – thank you! I do think I need to allow for more playfulness and range. Thanks for taking time to listen and comment. I’ll work on these things. All the best…

[Author]

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