Feedback Forum

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  • #15468
    David Goldberg
    Edge Studio Staff

    The Edge Studio Feedback Forum is the best place for you to post a recording and get feedback from the community! Record in your home studio, upload the file, and see what people think. This is a great place to get some advice on your technique, on your home studio, or to ask for people’s opinion on your reads. Remember, that this is a community forum, so please remain positive and encourage your peers in helpful ways. If Edge Studio feels that a user is too negative, or antagonizing other members of the community, they will have their posts deleted, and risk being banned from further communication. 

    Stay positive, listen to each other, and have fun!

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  • #57246
    kfvoice
    Participant

    Hello! I am new to the field, and am uploading the first reading of my narration assignment. Any and all feedback is welcome!

    I decided to read a script for a Web Promo Video under Internet Audio. My recording is under 60 seconds, but appears longer on here.

    (Please Note: This audio was recorded in a quiet space on a mobile app. Clicks and pops are evident.)

    Web Promo Video

    Meet Steve Hudson, owner of Hudson’s Cafe. This year, he opened location number twelve. Business is good… ‘cause the food is good.

    But there’s still work to do. See that pick-up and delivery counter? It’s got real potential, but Jessica can’t seem to crack the code.

    Jessica handles marketing for Hudson’s Cafe. Her team manages the new web site and the Facebook following. But what she’s about to propose will turn those marketing channels into real business growth. It’s called ChowNow.

    ChowNow puts your pick-up and delivery business online with simple, integrated ordering for your web site, your facebook page, and the custom iPhone app ChowNow creates just for you. Welcome to online and mobile ordering, Steve. You’re about to make some money.

    Go online and go mobile with…

    ChowNow

    We can take your orders.

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    • #57271
      SuperLuke
      Participant

      Hi kfvoice, just listened to your read. I’m glad you recorded in a quiet place where you wouldn’t have background noise. I think for this Web promo video, add more than 1 neutral emotion in your read, like gradually inserting three emotions in the delivery. It will make the promo more successful because you may decide to insert a smile in your voice as you perform “Meet Steve”, you might feel bummed out when you say, “But there’s work to do”, and then you may decide to be super excited about what Jessica is about to do.
      hope this comment helps
      -SL

      • #57300
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Noted! Thank you for the feedback!

  • #57232
    [email protected]
    Participant

    Looking for some feedback on my new character demo reel. Thanks in advance. positive, negative, or otherwise, I can take it.

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    • #57274
      katelyndawnvo
      Participant

      Hehe! I loved this. Wow what a variety of voices you have. This was great!

    • #57239
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Great reel! You do a vampire character very well! A nice range of character voices!

      • #57273
        SuperLuke
        Participant

        I enjoy this. Very dynamic characters and sound effects.

        Did you make it with Edge or at a Home Studio, on your own?
        Wish me luck as I continue making my own reel.

  • #57229
    WCamp
    Participant

    Just trying out a few characters in this copy for Chaucer’s Mead Trio.
    Tell me what you all think of it.

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    • #57275
      SuperLuke
      Participant

      Good background noises and the Viking/ English characters having a dialogue. Wish you had a script copy for the audience to follow along with. Great accents with the characters!
      Where does Chaucer’s Mead Trio come from?

      • #57352
        WCamp
        Participant

        Thank you for the feedback!!! I think I have a copy of the script.
        Here it is. The script actually came from Edge’s own library. Chaucer’s Mead
        is in Monterey and Santa Cruz, California.

        Here it is:
        We know your heart was in the right place, Douglas, but we’ve got to let you know: those last few Viking parties of yours have been a little on the foolish side. It isn’t just the visible seams on the chintzy plastic helmets, or the bath mats repurposed as l**n cloths. It’s the b***e. Face it, no matter how bejeweled the wrought-iron chalice you pour it into, cheap sangria is cheap sangria. But take heart, for hope joins the battle! This highly-rated, award-winning Chaucer’s Mead Trio delivers yesterday’s taste today, bringing an earthy authenticity to any pageant, feast, or faire, including the uninspiring likes of your Viking parties. And don’t worry – just because it’s named after Chaucer doesn’t mean it’s made in England. This be Calyfornyae wyne, goode sirre. And now, Douglas, your bottles three! You’ll get two bottles of Chaucer’s Mead, a distinctively rich dessert-style wine blended from three different types of honey: floral-smelling orange blossom honey, spicy toyon honey (toyon’s a member of the sage family), and dark, amber-hued alfalfa. It would’ve been easier for Chaucer’s Cellars to add artificial flavorings, colorings, or concentrates. But they didn’t need gimmicks like that in the original Chaucer’s day. If pure fermented honey was good enough to lighten the way on the pilgrimage to Canterbury, it’s good enough for us. You will find a titch of trickery about the odd mead out here – Chaucer’s Raspberry Mead – but only of the mildest sort. This fruity variation on a honeyed theme is made by adding a splash of Chaucer’s Raspberry Wine (15%) to the aforementioned Chaucer’s Mead (85%). Don’t get your breeches in a bunch, traditionalists. People’ve been mixing up mead and fruity wine for so long, there’s even a name for it: Melomel. Less sweet than regular mead and less regular than sweet mead, Chaucer’s Raspberry Mead will make you holler “Forsooth!” So raise high the goblet, Douglas, for tonight we drink mead! Yep, that’s what we’ll say a few weeks from now, after our Chaucer’s Mead Trio arrives.

        • #57420
          kfvoice
          Participant

          Really great reads! Love the characters!

          I was wondering when you delivered the line in the mead read: Yep, that’s what we’ll say a few weeks from now, after our Chaucer’s Mead Trio arrives. if after “Yep” (sounded like yet) you made it sound like you were downing a sip, or if that was not intentional, and were gasping for a breath? It was a little hard to tell on my end.

        • #57356
          WCamp
          Participant

          I have no idea what it is about those asterisks in weird places????

        • #57357
          kfvoice
          Participant

          It did that to my script, too. It was for the word “c-r-a-c-k”.

        • #57368
          WCamp
          Participant

          I guess that Edge’s algorithm thinks that those words are cuss words..lol

        • #57353
          WCamp
          Participant

          Here is another character I was thinking of re-doing….
          This one was for a local ad agency. It only ran for a week, about 3 years ago.
          I was going to dump the character, but after listening to it again, I think I’ll use him again.
          Tell me what you think.

          Here is the script. It also came from Edge’s library:
          Captain Morgan Private Stock has all the charm and discipline of an aristocrat, with the brass of a seafaring rogue. Crafted from the Captain’s oldest and finest Puerto Rican rums, distilled from pure cane sugar molasses, then blended with refined island spices. The result is an exceptionally well-mannered spirit that doesn’t forget where it comes from. A r*m brash enough to bunker down in a Bahama Mama, yet distinguished enough to be sipped over ice. Captain Morgan. An officer and a gentleman.

          • This reply was modified 3 years, 10 months ago by WCamp.
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  • #57213
    katelyndawnvo
    Participant

    Puzzle solved. The first makeup to precisely match your skin’s texture and tone. New L’oreal true match super blendable makeup. As close to your skin as a makeup can get. Because you’re worth it.

    Thanks for any feedback! 🙂

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    • #57216
      SuperLuke
      Participant

      Nice commercial promotion. Good recording quality and performance.

      While I enjoy hearing your voice in this performance, there are some parts where I feel you can work on pacing. In the beginning, after you say “puzzle solved”, take a brief moment to pause. It will grab your audience’s attention and they will wonder what puzzle is being solved. Maybe as you perform, “Because you’re worth it”, maybe slow it down a little bit.
      Keep up the good work and hope this was helpful,
      -SL

      • #57280
        katelyndawnvo
        Participant

        Thank you! I’m going to start uploading changes as per people’s suggestions otherwise I won’t really learn. I think this one sounds better and I took your direction 🙂 THank you!

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        • #57414
          kfvoice
          Participant

          I like this read. I am not sure if you did this on purpose, but I did notice in both that you skipped the “a” in As close to your skin as a makeup can get.

  • #57205
    JackStansbury
    Participant

    Hello! Uploading my commercial coaching homework reads 🙂 Any feedback is welcome and appreciated!

    Script 1 – Jack Daniels

    Giving the right gift is easy. Just follow these simple steps.

    First, pick up a bottle of Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Whiskey.
    Now, the size ya choose depends on who it’s for. Say, your boss, a friend or a brother.

    Second, get some wrapping paper and ribbon. It’s kinda like wrappin’ a tennis racket. They’re gonna know what it is, but that’s part of the charm.

    Script 2 – Kerry Gold

    It’s more than luck that brings people together. KerryGold, pure Irish butter. Made with milk from grass-fed cows that graze on the lush pastures of Ireland

    Script 3 – Durex

    This is Bob. Bob is an idiot. Bob makes mistakes. A lot of them. Oh, Bob. He may not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but despite all his faults, even an idiot like Bob knows he needs protection. Durex. Smart.

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    • #57215
      SuperLuke
      Participant

      Hi Jack,
      Comment: Good commercial performances. There’s also a good recording quality (i.e. having no background noises). I don’t know what your assignment was though.

      Critique: While you are staying point by point in reading and performing the commercials for buying Jack Daniels, Butter, and Bob being an idiot while still knowing to buy a product, I think you should experiment with your voice talent some more. Add more emphasis on keywords, like, “Giving the Right gift is Easy”, “that’s part of the Charm”, “Kerry gold”. “Bob makes Mistakes. a lot of them”. Try adding something to emphasize, to hint to a listener that bob is an idiot but he’s smart enough to buy the right product…

      Hope this message helps,
      -SL

  • #57190
    SuperLuke
    Participant

    For my Character Voice-Over demo and a session this upcoming Friday, my coach wanted me to practice the accent for Cockney and for Received Pronunciation (R.P). He also wanted me to keep all my characters sounding different from each other. Let me know what you think so far and I’ll look forward to feedback.

    Script for the Magician in R.P
    1) Ladies and gentlemen, this blade has been passed down through generations of magicians, like me. Its power is to be Respected and Feared. Very few may wield it. Oh no! What have I done?! (breaks off)
    (Cuts off)
    Script for Cockney Knight:
    2) Sir Knight, you must save us from the dragon who swells in the Volcano…Why are you ‘iding behind your ‘orse? Mmmm. You ain’t a brave warrior at all. Oh, give me your sword and I’ll k**l it me self!

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 10 months ago by SuperLuke.
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    • #57380
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Like the accent and it was clear and easy to understand what your were saying. Good job.

  • #57193
    GJS
    Participant

    Thank you SuperLuke! Tried for the “natural” sound on Allstate & went for the obvious “Trailer” sound and pacing on the Hagios Press script. Just not sure if the All-State was too flat in the middle.

  • #57173
    bergtravis
    Participant

    narrative hw

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    • #57209
      JackStansbury
      Participant

      Nice job! You have a really nice, clear vocal quality that sounds great for narration and the tempo of this read is great! The one thing I want to give feedback on is that it sounds like you’re thinking really hard about using the proper inflection patterns while you read this and it’s hurting the authenticity of your read. The first sentence there is the best example of this. Stressing the important bits is good but it’s important to do so in moderation

  • #57171
    bergtravis
    Participant

    narration hw

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    • #57188
      SuperLuke
      Participant

      So, is this a test preparation? I notice so far that your recordings reflect on academics and E learning-related materials. I don’t know the homework your coach asked for you to do. But I’d say if you are going for the E-learning genre in Voiceover, you are in the right direction. Are you trying to sound happy about what you are reading?

  • #57169
    bergtravis
    Participant

    Narration Homework

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    • #57187
      SuperLuke
      Participant

      While listening to this performance, I hear this as something I might find associated with the Discovery Channel or Animal Planet. I don’t know what kind of homework your coach gave you to do. But maybe put more emphasis as you narrate “life from death” at the end because you’re saying there is something serious going on with the animals in the herd. Maybe put more emphasis as you describe the lion, the pride, the cubs, and the elephants, life-giving water etc.

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