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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Good evening all! Doing my daily recording here for upcoming commercial demo. I’m a newbie so any criticism is welcome – thank you!
JC Penney 6
Your brain has 2 sides. The right side: creative, buys things, has fun. The left side: organized, practical, saves money. Now JC Penney makes both sides happy. It’s the buy more, save more sale. It’s simple, the more you buy, the more you save. 20 to 30%. So use your head. Buy more. Save more. Only at JC Penney.-
When you first started the read, I pictured you in a cave or some large empty room. You could definitely work on that. The read was a little devil-may-care which I think would work with some scripts but maybe not this one.But I like your overall tone.
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Your voice works well with the script and I do like your choice of words to hit. Your performance on the other hand, doesn’t have a very welcoming tone. You sound nonchalant or sarcastic. Contrary to what they show on TV, such behavior does not help a store make sales. I’d suggest you adopt a performance that is more caring and helpful to the listener. Also, you need to work on your recording setup, you sound like you’re in a bathroom.
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Spent a b*m load of time on this guy today haha! I’ve been feeling really heavy and feeling like how the heck are we all going to get through this and I put that into my read. I hope it comes across well. Also threw in some music for this one. Thanks for any feedback! 🙂
NIKE:
It’s a mindset. A focus. A deep seated spirit. It’s an inner strength to keep your feet planted firmly on the ground, no matter what presses against you. It’s confidence. It’s belief. It’s a way of life. It’s Nike.-
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Your take on the script was a nice touch. I’d normally expect a more excited tone for a shoe commercial, but your spin on it worked amazingly well. Your pausing makes the script a sound a little choppy, but since you’re relaxed and doing it at the end of each sentence, it works into the read great. Just remember, you mustn’t pause in the middle of a sentence like you do at the end and generally you should avoid hitting the words at the end of the sentence. Keep up the good work!
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Very good clarity and pace on this one. The piano music was nice and complimented or accentuated the flow pretty well. Just a couple things,one I wouldn’t have highlighted “matter” sounds off key, then on the ending not much emphasis was placed on the brand name Nike. Maybe just change the tone on the last sentence with Nike to be a little more uplifting, overall nice work on this!
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“The Raven,” by Edgar Allen Poe<
Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore—
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,
As of some one gently rapping, rapping at my chamber door.
“’Tis some visitor,” I muttered, “tapping at my chamber door—
Only this and nothing more.”Ah, distinctly I remember it was in the bleak December;
And each separate dying ember wrought its ghost upon the floor.
Eagerly I wished the morrow;—vainly I had sought to borrow
From my books surcease of sorrow—sorrow for the lost Lenore—
For the rare and radiant maiden whom the angels name Lenore—
Nameless here for evermore.And the silken, sad, uncertain rustling of each purple curtain
Thrilled me—filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating
“’Tis some visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door—
Some late visitor entreating entrance at my chamber door;—
This it is and nothing more.”Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
“Sir,” said I, “or Madam, truly your forgiveness I implore;
But the fact is I was napping, and so gently you came rapping,
And so faintly you came tapping, tapping at my chamber door, -
4/h
It began with the seed of an idea. In 1902, the heartland needed folks to embrace new advances in agriculture. But leaders with open minds, strong hearts and willing hands weren’t in abundance.Luckily, kids were.By empowering the next generation to lead, 4/H took root.And grew.Grew kids who are confident and strong.Who are curious enough to question. And capable enough to find the answer. True leaders aren’t born.They’re grown. 4/H GROWS HERE
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1-800 Greeting and On-Hold Messages
Hello and thank you for calling Canada Energy Service Corporation – Canada’s best choice for new high efficiency appliances, guaranteed! Your call is very important to us today and may be recorded and monitored for quality assurance purposes.
To speak to one of our friendly Customer Care Specialists today, please choose from the following 3 options:
• Press 1 if you have recently applied for an upgrade or to request new information about our high efficiency appliances, exciting rental programs or your FREE in-home evaluation
• Press 2 if you are an existing client and require immediate appliance service and support
• Press 3 to reach our billing department
Or remain on the line, and one of our Customer Care Specialists will be with you in a moment-
Hi danvasq4030! I think you have a great voice for this style of narration. Calm, warm, easy-listening. The quality of your recording was clear, too. As already mentioned, be careful of extra pauses not in the script, however, you needed a micro-pause between “support … Press 3”. The Press 3 line was also read a little faster compared to the rest of the script. Overall, good job!
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You have pleasant toned voice that is easy to listen to! I liked your read, and I would recommend that you be aware of any extra pauses you may be inserting and perhaps shorten them or even exclude some of them for better flow. Also, consider reading a little faster for the listener who is mainly trying to find out what number to press! I think you began to get a little faster around “Press 3 to reach our billing department.”
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Social Security
Whether you’re young or old, male or female, single or with a family – this video is for and about you. That’s because Social Security has programs that affect everybody. This presentation was prepared by the Social Security Administration and tells you what you need to know about Social Security while still working and what you need to know when it’s your turn to collect benefits. It also provides an overview of Medicare and Supplemental Security Income benefits.
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Hi all, just practicing for more additions to demo reel, thanks for listening!
Travelocity.com
Congratulations! You’ve successfully planned another vacation. You’ve called the airlines, the hotels, the rental car places and you’ve just hung up the phone. So brace yourself – the nagging doubt, the one that says, did I get a good deal on this vacation? There’s a better way to book travel. Travelocity.com. You’ll have over 700 airlines, over 45,000 hotels, and over 50 rental car companies all at your fingertips. You’re in control. Even look at a picture of your hotel room, or choose your airline seat. Enjoy vacation, and save your nagging doubt for your auto-mechanic. Travelocity.com…go virtually anywhere.-
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Nice! I like this quite a bit. Mixing note, I think the music was a tad loud. While you were definitely hitting the friendly and welcoming vibe, there were a few points I think you could have boosted the enthusiasm to vary your tone just to keep it interesting and really hit home the fact that this is exciting stuff!! 🙂 Nice work!
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Hello,
I am uploading commerical recordings for commercial demo homework. I would love your feedback. Thank you in advance.-
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Hi arwilliamsvo! I really liked the warmth in your voice, super welcoming and nice tone to listen to. I liked all three recordings, good variation in pitch on all of them. The third one on Legos was my favorite, but all worked well for your voice. Good reads!
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On the second one (Old Navy) despite how excited you sounded I felt like you were still holding back on your excitement. I have this same problem big time. Try letting all the excitement out! 🙂
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Sounds great to me arwilliamsvo, good reality type delivery and enthusiasm! I would tick the volume down one notch thru editing, however minor that maybe though, sounding great!
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Another narration reel for feedback. Thanks in advance!
eLearning/Education
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E-Learning VO tutorial
“This video will show you how to create a new email account in Outlook XP. The first step in creating a new email account is to open Outlook XP. Once the program is open, move your mouse to the upper hand menu and click the tools button. Scroll down, and click “email accounts”. The “email accounts” box will appear. Select the “add a new email account” option, and then click “Next”. You will now be prompted to enter the type of server that operates your email account. Select “Pop3”, and click “Next”.
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Hey all, here is another practice for my narration homework. I can hear a little bit of saliva on my “f’s”, but out of all the ones I recorded and listened to, I felt this one captured the tempo of the script. Let me know what you think. All is appreciated.
Biographies
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Mary Pickford
Forget Julia Roberts—Mary Pickford was America’s first sweetheart. Audiences couldn’t get enough. When she took Hollywood by storm in 1909, at 17 years old, Mary appeared in 51 movies. In her first year, she made 51 films, that’s almost one a week!
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Hi kfvoice! I liked the tone and pace of the read, made me want to keep listening to hear more about Mary. Good read!
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