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  • #57337
    FCabral
    Participant

    Hey all! Trying some poetry since it’s totally the same thing as narration right? Right?
    I know that some of my p’s pop, but other than that any and all feedback/criticism is extremely welcome.

    On lowland plains I wander//All in the falling year,//By lowland valleys ponder//Upon my true love dear;//But spring will soon restore me//The smiles of Mary’s eye,//And the grand clouds flying o’er me//Upon the mountains high.
    Within the lowland valley//There stands a castle strong,//Where round in each green alley//You’ll hear the wild bird’s song;//Far sweeter visions move me,//When I hear the eagle’s cry,//From the fields of G*d above me,//Upon the mountains high.
    When autumn time is coming//Along the hills and dells,//You’ll hear the wild bees humming//Among the heather bells;//You’ll hear the g*y streams singing//Their songs to earth and sky,//Like the sounds of glad bells ringing//Upon the mountains high.
    Amid their summits airy,//In sweet spring’s blessed reign,//I’ll sit beside my Mary//With happy heart again;//I have no wish beyond her,//And man can ne’er descry//Two youthful lovers fonder//Upon the mountain high.

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    • #57421
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi FCabral! I loved the tone in your voice and the pace of the read, it seems very well suited for poetry like this. On the 3rd verse it sounded like a few of the words ending with “ing” were said to not pronounce the “g” – comin’ vs. coming; hummin’ vs humming; singin’ vs. singing and ringin’ vs. ringing. It all rhymed with each other, but I wonder if it was intended to drop the g’s? Just something I noticed.

    • #57394
      SuperLuke
      Participant

      Wonderful epic (narrative) poetry!

    • #57386
      Jfaustin520
      Participant

      This sounded so cool. I can totally picture what you are saying. I can only imagine how it would sound with background music. A few ways to make this better could probably be watching the “s” sounds for sibilance and maybe editing out the mouth noises. However, I think you did a really great job with this poem.

  • #57334
    kfvoice
    Participant

    Today was my first day trying Audacity, and I thought I would do something different besides reading narration scripts, and went for a promo read. All feedback is appreciated. Thanks!

    Promos and Trailers

    Spotify Premium

    Is this really what you want? Some guy cutting into your tunes trying to sell you something you really don’t care about. I didn’t think so. Try spotify premium. for only $9.99 a month you can get rid of me and anyone else who tries to interrupt your music.

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    • #57376
      waninick
      Participant

      KF, Nice voice, mostly good clear diction. Might want to add the ‘t’ on the end of ‘want’, and the word “didn’t” didn’t quite come out clean. Other than that, it just needs to be edited a bit tighter. Too much space between “care about” and “I didn’t think so.” A couple of other places as well. But the interpretation was really good! Nice Work..!

      • #57395
        SuperLuke
        Participant

        KF, I enjoy the performance. Good diction. Speed it up a little bit. I like your first recording better than the second. You sounded calmer and more like a real convincing commercial. Try aiming for 12 seconds, maybe?

        • #57425
          kfvoice
          Participant

          Thanks, SL. Noted!

          About the two reels — they are the same one. I edited my post, and added it again, thinking it had to be uploaded again, too. (I wanted to edit my post to mention this, but after a couple of edits, it seems the forum doesn’t let you edit your posts. Or give the option to replace or delete a recording.)

      • #57377
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Thank you, waninick! I’m trying to get better at pronouncing my “t’s”. Sometimes it sounds like I am forcing it too much.

    • #57339
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Not bad, try to pick it up a little with your tone.

  • #57330
    Robert Broussard
    Participant

    Nice voice tone and pace.

  • #57327
    Robert Broussard
    Participant

    UCLA
    We are UCLA Extension.
    We are scholars, innovators, visionaries, experimenters. We are idealists, artists, and optimists.
    We have a one hundred-year legacy of taking the unconventional path; the road less traveled. We know that you don’t have to be a student to study. Because we know that knowledge is for everyone and that education improves people’s lives and makes communities stronger. We try and fail and then we try again [slight pause] because we know that there are many paths to success and we are defining our own goals and charting our own course.
    [Pace of the VO picks up a little bit] We go into the unknown. We challenge ourselves. We keep rising. We dare to dream. We are here to make the world better. We are UCLA.

    I have mixed my first recording with background music. Please give and feedback. Thanks

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    • #57419
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Robert Broussard – nice music choice; seems to go well with the read. Your voice is very easy to listen to, clear and smooth word delivery. You have an accent that makes your voice believable for this type of read. Good job!

    • #57333
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Hi Robert, I like the background music you have chosen for this spot. I thought you had a very clear read, however, be careful of micro-pauses in places that are not necessary. Otherwise, nice job!

  • #57324
    JasonCawley
    Participant

    “This does all seem rather bizarre. We are familiar with the world around us where everything behaves as we would expect. An apple falls from the tree to the ground according to classical laws. It all makes sense, but, at the very small we see classical laws break down. In the quantum world, particles behave in a weird way. They can be in different places at the same time. A cloud of possibilities. This is the strange world of quantum theory.”

    Took some time off, getting back into the training and practice. Any feedback is appreciated, thanks for listening.

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  • #57320
    mkell755
    Participant

    Hello all! Looking for any and all criticism for upcoming commercial demo – thank you!

    Mountain Home, Arkansas

    Welcome to Mountain Home, Arkansas, where visitors can enjoy watersports like kayaking, canoeing and floating on the White River. Mountain Home is ideally situated between two colossal lakes and is only 15 minutes from the three rivers, the Buffalo, White and North Fork.

    Not only are the water sports spectacular, the fishing is world class. Whether looking to land striper, trout, walleye or bass, the waters in the Mountain Home area are always stocked.

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    • #57329
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Your voice is nice and clear. But your tone is very mono tone. Try to hit certian words and add some spice to your dialog.

      • #57418
        mkell755
        Participant

        Thanks Robert Broussard! I will work on not being monotone. In my head I think I’m being too up and down / animated, but I guess I can vary it more to make the read better. Thanks!

  • #57316
    Alexis Williams
    Participant

    Hello,
    I am uploading demo homework and would love your feedback on each.

    Thank you

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    • #57322
      Alexis Williams
      Participant

      Please disregard the last audio file. Uploaded wrong file.

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  • #57312
    kfvoice
    Participant

    My attempt at a live announcement… I have heard a variety of ranges/styles, but I don’t think I have found the right one for me yet. 🙂

    Good afternoon passengers. This is the pre-boarding announcement for flight 89B to Rome. We are now inviting those passengers with small children, and any passengers requiring special assistance, to begin boarding at this time. Please have your boarding pass and identification ready. Regular boarding will begin in approximately ten minutes time. Thank you.

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  • #57289
    mkell755
    Participant

    Hi all! I’m posting a read for feedback in prep for my commercial demo – thanks for any and all comments!

    Funny thing being a red head…when I was a kid, I just wanted to be like everybody else, now it’s one of the things that makes me me. Get your best color. Revlon High Dimension Hair Color, so precise it takes only 10 minutes to deliver rich, dimensional color where it’s needed most. Every time. With deep conditioners that gently protect so your hair stays soft and shiny, and beautiful. I like being me.. 10 minutes to beautiful. Revlon. Be unforgettable.

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    • #57367
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      You have nice voice, but its easy to tell you are reading. Keep working on it and think about changing tempo a little and hit certain words to emphasize key points
      in the message. Good job.

      • #57417
        mkell755
        Participant

        Thanks Robert Brossard, I would like to avoid sounding like I’m reading; will work on those tips. Thank you!

    • #57348
      katelyndawnvo
      Participant

      Hey there, I like your voice for this read. You sound like a sophisticated lady. I think the flow could use some work meaning there are some pauses that you could smooth out, and not pausing between ideas – you can smooth out places like “color where (pause) it’s needed most” doesn’t need the pause. There also sounded like there was a question mark at the end of “needed most. Every time.” I’ve done this too a few times I naturally go up in pitch sometimes and it sounds like a question mark, but this is a definitive statement and a strong opinion you have because this hair color product is just so great! Keep working on it! You have a nice sophisticated vocal tone 🙂

      • #57415
        mkell755
        Participant

        Thank you katelyndawnvo! Yes, I’ve been told I do the uptalk or valley girl thing where it sounds like a question mark instead of a sentence; so I definitely need to work on that. Thank you for your specificity! I really appreciate it. 🙂

        • This reply was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by mkell755.
    • #57301
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Hello! The tempo here flowed well in your reading. Perhaps when you say “me, me” emphasis the second me. I did notice between some words and sentences you had a tendency to do a clicking sound, particularly between “beautiful. I like being me.” Otherwise a good read!

      • #57303
        mkell755
        Participant

        Thank you kfvoice! I will work on the clicking sound and the word emphasis. Thanks!

  • #57284
    katelyndawnvo
    Participant

    Oops… I thought I replaced the first one as the first breath needed to be edited out. But now they are both there. hee..hee…Thanks for the feedback alls y’all! Happy Friday!

    Blue Ridge Mountains
    If you‘re in the dark about where to ski, let us shed some light on the subject. High in Virginia‘s Blue Ridge Mountains, discover what‘s been called the Mid-Atlantic‘s finest overall ski experience. Wintergreen offers 10 slopes, five lifts, and an extensive snow-making system. Not to mention luxurious accommodations, an indoor spa, and a nationally recognized children‘s program. For more information, call 1-800-ski-green. That‘s 1-800-ski-green. Wintergreen and Virginia…the perfect combination!

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    • #57433
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Hello, a question for you. How did you get your picture on your profile? Your picture is very good by the way!

    • #57292
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Katelyndawnvo – nice read! I liked the lightness in your voice, very pleasant and uplifting to listen to. The text flowed and made me curious to know more about skiing at Wintergreen. Great job!

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