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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Working on sounding more informative than happy, and more natural and spontaneous. Any feedback is appreciated! Trying to find where I fit naturally with narration and I love history and travel.
Travelogue: Egypt has always been a land of mystery and magic.
A land different from all others, difficult to understand, apart and alien, yet strangely fascinating.
It was the most self-contained of all the countries of the ancient world;
it lived its own life, practiced its own religion, and made up its own government with hardly any outside interference either from or upon other civilizations.-
Hi K – Overall, I liked how you used pitch variation to add variety and I also thought your fluidity was nice throughout. And I totally agree with the other comments about having a connection to the topic as you do in this case makes the read easier and more natural rather than “just reading a script”. I think your connection is a large part of what made it appealing. I also thought the second half of your read was the best because it sounded more natural and conversational than the first due to you picking up the tempo. Just to give you a sense of the difference, you read the first half at just under 2 words/second and the second half at 2.7 words/second. The second half sounded like I imagine you sound when having a conversation with a friend. Nice work on this.
Chas
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Hi Katelyn!
This was a good read. Nice job on varying your pitch with the lists! I agree, perhaps try slowing down just a tad, and see how it sounds.
There is a lot to explore with narration, I agree. It is true, anything that you find interesting, or love to do, seems to be easier in connecting to a copy. Your voice would fit this niche within narration nicely.
Keep it up!
Kathy
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Hi Katelyn! This was good. It felt a tiny bit rushed to me between sentences but overall was very clear and flowed really well. Your voice is naturally friendly and happy-sounding and that’s a good thing! I think you can be friendly and informative, and it actually helps the read too if you are interested in the topic, which you appear to be. Keep it up!
Mary
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Some commercial practice – thanks for your help!
This is a happy belly. This is too. And so is this. At Happy Family, we’re on mission to keep them that way. It’s why our delicious organic yogurt is made without any added sweeteners, because that adorable belly is sweet enough already. Introducing Happy Baby and Happy Tot whole milk yogurt with probiotics. Because happy starts on the inside.
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Very nice read! I really liked your sweet warm tone and your voice definitely fits the copy. Perhaps could flow a little bit better from sentence to sentence. I struggle with this myself. I stop between phrases to breathe and then I edit it shorter later but sometimes not short enough. That is really my only thought listening to it. I think you did great!
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Any comments are welcome!
History Channel
If you lived before our time, who would you be?
Would you fight your brother for the rights of another? Who would you be?
Would you find new dreams or create wonders?
What if you could choose from a 1,000 yesterdays; a 1,000 lives, when the past was today and the new took your breath away.
Who would you be? What would you feel? How would you live? Who would you love?
Remembering every generation before us;
Remembering for generations to come.
The History Channel. Where the past comes alive. -
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Hi AdeB! I like your tone and emphasis on the words, and getting into character was good. For the second script I would agree with other comments about the speed of the read, you could possibly slow down a bit and really phase each sentence as one complete thought before moving on. I think that would help it feel like you were talking and not reading. I hope that helps, keep it up!
Mary
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Hello all! Looking for any and all feedback (recorded on my phone). Working on sounding trustworthy for this one. Let me know what you think. (oops, missed the word “with” in the first sentence – ug). Thanks!
Mary
United Bank and Trust
Ten years ago, you could walk into your bank and people called you by your first name. You’d sit down with someone you’d been working with for years, and you’d get the help you needed … and it was personal … one on one … you know what I mean. But now in most banks, you’re just a number … and unless you’re a big customer with a fat account, don’t look for any favors. Thank heaven there’s UNITED BANK AND TRUST, doing business the old-fashioned way.-
You have a nice smooth voice and easy delivery. I think it might help you to have more “skin in the game” – really believing and picturing the things that you’re saying so that you sound invested without overselling.
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Mary, that was really good. The more you are varying your tones and hitting words of importance the better you are getting!! I like it.
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Hi Robert, very impressive read and a good tone for this! In case you didn’t know you must have recorded in stereo not mono, only have your voice on left channel and music on right one.
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Narration for Vietnam War. Thanks for any feedback.
The Vietnam War was a long, costly armed conflict that pitted the communist regime of North Vietnam and its southern allies, known as the Viet Cong, against South Vietnam and its principal ally, the United States. The divisive war, increasingly unpopular at home, ended with the withdrawal of U.S. forces in 1973 and the unification of Vietnam under Communist control two years later. More than 3 million people served, including 58,000 plus Americans, were killed in action during the conflict. Over 303,704 were wounded in action, of these 75,000 were classified as 100% disabled. 5,283 lost limbs with 1,081 sustaining multiple amputations. Only 25% of the total forces in-country were draftees as opposed to WWII where 66% were drafted to serve in the U.S. Armed Forces.
Though relatively little official data exists about female Vietnam War veterans, the Vietnam Women’s Memorial Foundation estimates that approximately 11,000 military women were stationed in Vietnam during the conflict. Nearly all of them were volunteers, and 90 percent served as military nurses, though women also worked as physicians, air traffic controllers, intelligence officers, clerks and other positions in the U.S. Women’s Army Corps, U.S. Navy, Air Force and Marines and the Army Medical Specialist Corps. In addition to women in the armed forces, an unknown number of civilian women served in Vietnam on behalf of the Red Cross, United Service Organizations (USO), Catholic Relief Services and other humanitarian organizations, or as foreign correspondents for various news organizations.-
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Hi Robert!
Great job on the read! Great choice of music, too. With that said, the volume of the background music almost drowned out your voice, in my opinion. Minor suggestion.
Keep it up!
— Kathy
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Hi Robert! That sounded good, you have a good voice for this genre. It did seem to fade out in the ling with “…ended with the withdrawal of U.S. forces in 1973…” but then came back to the same volume later. I also heard “decisive” instead of “divisive” in the second line. Not a big deal. There are so many number stats in this read (concentrated in lines 3 and 4 mainly), I wonder if you could really emphasis those numbers when you come to them so that the listener can take a beat to understand how shocking the statistics of this war really are. The read overall flowed well. Good job!
Mary
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Thanks Mary, I am using a Shure SMB7 mic. It is a dynamic mic. I am wondering if that happens when I move around and my distance from the mic may vary. I will have to work on that and hit key points.
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I submitted this one sometime back on a pay-to-play site, not sure what happened to it but any comments are appreciated.
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Hi there. Here is a narration script. any feedback is appreciated 🙂
Born in Seattle, Washington, on October 28, 1955, William Henry Gates III is the only son of the three children of Mary and William Henry Gates, Jr.
A bright and active child, Bill began cutting classes to hang out at all hours at his private school‘s computer center.
When he was only 16, he and friend Paul Allen sold their computer-run system to monitor highway traffic and reportedly earned $20,000 –
but business fell off when customers found out that the entrepreneurs were still in high school.-
Hi Katelyn!
Nice read! Good job with changing your pitch and tone. One suggestion: the script had the date as “28”, and that is how you read it (because we don’t want to change what is written), but in an audition you might want to check how they would want you to read it. It seems common to say “28th” when speaking, even when it’s not on paper. A minor detail, but important one. Keep it up!
Kathy
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Hi Kaitlin, I do enjoy your short commercials that you post that give a feeling of satisfaction and happiness about the product you’re promoting. I had been reading in the past regarding different genres of VoiceOver and one coach had mentioned online that we can’t be all things to all people. From what I know which is not much narration is a whole different animal than TV or radio spots, without in mind I only mentioned this to help that in your narration it sounds a little happy versus informative if that helps, thanks for sharing and good luck!
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Thanks! Commercial does feel natural to me but I’ve been working with a coach on commercial since I think July. I’ve only been practicing narration for a week LOL it is very new and does feel very different for sure. It also spans like a few dozen different types – eLearning, bio, corporate, explainer, documentary, mobile apps etc. I just gotta find out what fits for me. Lots of work to do! Lots of trial and error. Thank you for listening!! 🙂
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Wow that was wonderful! Your emphasis on key words is spot on. I noticed that the very beginning seemed a little slow, I would try tweaking the pace very slightly next time but otherwise great job!
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Looking for performance feedback, thanks!
Script: “This lesson dedicated to snare drum rudiments introduces the Flams: Flam Accent, Flam Paradiddle, Flamacue and Flam Tap.
The Flam, in musical theory and writing, doesn’t have a definite value; it can be described as a double stroke made by a first-hand weak stroke closely followed by an accented, stronger second-hand stroke. It’s a grace note, represented in drum charts by a smaller note with a tie put just before the principal note. For a correct execution of a Flam, the stick that plays the weaker stroke starts from about one inch from the drumhead, and the stick that plays the principal stroke starts from a superior height.” -
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