Feedback Forum

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    Topic
  • #15468
    David Goldberg
    Edge Studio Staff

    The Edge Studio Feedback Forum is the best place for you to post a recording and get feedback from the community! Record in your home studio, upload the file, and see what people think. This is a great place to get some advice on your technique, on your home studio, or to ask for people’s opinion on your reads. Remember, that this is a community forum, so please remain positive and encourage your peers in helpful ways. If Edge Studio feels that a user is too negative, or antagonizing other members of the community, they will have their posts deleted, and risk being banned from further communication. 

    Stay positive, listen to each other, and have fun!

Viewing 3,148 reply threads
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    Replies
  • #59391
    mrtripo9
    Participant

    Hi everyone, wanted to share this read on a controversial script..will love your feedback. 🙂 thanks.

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    • #59471
      kfvoice
      Participant

      mrtripo9 — Great tone throughout the read! Your voice fits this kind of script very well. I ditto what Mary said about the pen tip — it helps!

      Keep it up!

      Kathy

      • #59637
        mrtripo9
        Participant

        Thanks Kathy, always appreciate yr feedback 🙂

    • #59455
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Mrtripo9! Wow, interesting topic to hear. I really like your deep warm voice and the flow of the script – very nice! “According to them” sounded like “According to dem” to me. I tend to squish words too like “n” instead of “and”, so for me it’s keeping my mouth slightly more open during those words. My coach told me too that if you put a pen in your mouth as practice before the read, it helps open your mouth more so the words don’t get squished, not sure if that makes sense or helps. Great tone here!

      Mary

      • #59636
        mrtripo9
        Participant

        Thanks Mary, your feedback is always honest , I am truly learning a lot from this forum , I am having tough time with annunciation with my retainer in place. (:.

  • #59384
    mkell755
    Participant

    Hello all! Here is my daily recording (done on my phone) for any and all feedback. The script cracked me up. Thank you!

    Mary

    Dultuth Trading: Free-Swingin’-Flannel
    What in the world has happened to flannel shirts? They feel boardy, shrink like crazy and fall apart after a couple of days on the job. Our Free Swingin’ Flannel is a heartier 5.6-oz. 100% cotton for larger-than-life comfort, durability and warmth. We brush it twice for extra loft and softness. Maybe best of all, it has our easy-moving Armpit Gussets. A button-down collar means you can wear it under a sport jacket, which guys in Duluth actually do – some of them even get married in flannel!

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    • #59470
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Hi Mary!

      “Free Swingin’ Flannel” could be a tongue twister! Say that 10 times fast! lol

      Caught a few minor micro-pauses, but overall a good job!

      Kathy

      • #59590
        mkell755
        Participant

        Hi Kathy! Thanks for the feedback! I will work on those unintended micro-pauses, thanks again for listening!

        Mary

    • #59437
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      What is wrong with getting married in a flannel tux? lol. Good job Mary!

      • #59451
        mkell755
        Participant

        Hi Robert! LOL! Nothing! It’s still funny to think about and say it however! Thanks for the feedback 🙂

        Mary

    • #59399
      sabpierotti
      Participant

      Hi, Mary! Good job. Can I ask what room you are recording this in? It doesn’t sound soundproof, and it sounds like you’re surrounded by a lot of hard surfaces. I actually record in my tiny closet and all of the clothes help absorb the sound! I suggest sound-proofing some sort of space in your home for recordings.

      • #59453
        mkell755
        Participant

        Hi Sabpierotti! Thanks! I’m not set up in my home studio yet, will be working on that soon. It is definitely not soundproof, and there are lots of hard surfaces. I’ve only done one recording in my closet so far but it was sooo flat. Hopefully you and others will be able to tell once I get a mic and some sound-proofing. For now, this is just to get consistent in my delivery. Thanks again!

        Mary

    • #59390
      mrtripo9
      Participant

      I love it, all Duluth ad’s crack me up…love the read

      • #59454
        mkell755
        Participant

        Hi Mrtripo9, thanks for the feedback! Yes, Duluth is so hilarious – I need to meet their writers someday! Thanks for the feedback!

        Mary

  • #59368
    Dante M.
    Participant

    Hello everyone!

    I was instructed by the talented Art Bruder to share my takes on three example scripts I found in the edge library. The first one is a nutritious breakfast cereal ad, the second one is a history channel documentary, and the third one is an educational explainer video. Hit me hard with the feedback!

    I had a particularly hard time with the second script, I can’t quite pinpoint why. I’m sure you all can give me feedback on it though!

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    • #59386
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Dante! Love your voice! So nice, deep and rich. Great clarity, pacing and emphasis on the appropriate words in all of them
      Script 1: This sounded really good for you, good energy and decisive-sounding. Good smile in your voice.
      Script 2: This sounded like you were trying to be more serious than your natural tone (not sure if that’s true, just what I’m hearing), and because of that did not seem as authentic to me. It had some variation in tone, but could use maybe a little more?
      Script 3: This was good! It sounded believable and helpful. Also good smile and decisive tone. Good work!

      Mary

      • #59387
        Dante M.
        Participant

        That was the tone I was going for in the second audio clip, but I felt very unnatural doing it, and it reflected in my work. I can’t wait to go over this one with my coach.

  • #59358
    kfvoice
    Participant

    Helllooo! Here is a little in-store announcement script I put together for Costco Wholesale, specifically for Costco Grocery. It took me a little while to get what I was going for. Apologies if I sound nasally; nothing I can do at the moment. Let me know what you think. All feedback is welcome and appreciated! Thanks!

    Kathy

    Costco Grocery

    Hey, Costco customers, are you looking for something incredible to serve at your holiday dinner party? Head over to Costco Grocery for beautifully prepared steaks, imported cheeses, fresh lobster, and buttery caviar!

    And, don’t forget dessert! Costco bakers can help you pair the perfect sweet with a lovely bottle of wine!

    (P.S. Make sure you pick up cookies for Santa. You don’t want to get on his naughty list…)

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    • #59400
      sabpierotti
      Participant

      Kathy,

      You definitely have the voice for in-store announcements! Great job. My only suggestion would be to not pause too long between sentences, keep the same tempo throughout. Also, for the last sentence (ex: Ps…) I suggest keeping this sentence at the same volume level as the rest of the announcement. I understand why you read it the way you did, but for an in-store announcement I don’t know if the “whisper/secret” strategy works. I hope this makes sense! Keep up the good work.

      • #59417
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Thanks sabpierotti for the feedback! I can go back and edit the pauses, and tighten them up! And keeping the volume the same for the “P.S.” sentence does make sense! I’ll go back in and do that line over, or make a new recording if it doesn’t exactly match. Thanks again!

        Kathy

    • #59366
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Kathy! This was good. It may be a regional pronunciation difference, but I noticed that you said “caviar” with an accented last syllable, but I have only ever heard it accented on the first syllable, not a big deal but I had not heard it that way before (nor do I eat a lot of caviar :))

      On the “And, don’t forget dessert!” it sounded a little monotone, and not like an exclamation point, but more like a period. I did not hear a pause after “and,” this might help punch up that line. That sentence feels like it should be emphasized like you did with “…bottle of wine!”. On the last line, the “…cookies for Santa” seemed a little monotone as well; I think you could try more emphasis on “naughty”. just my opinion so it does not just fade off in thought and pitch. Good job!!!

      Mary

      • #59418
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Hi Mary! Hmmm. Maybe caviar is different regionally? https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/caviar

        I actually intended to deliver those sentences you mentioned with a more monotone sound, especially the “P.S.” line. I pretty much ignored my own punctuation, lol. I read the copy two ways, and this version sounded better. Maybe it was me.

        Thanks again for the feedback. I always appreciate it!

        Kathy

        • #59458
          mkell755
          Participant

          Hi Kathy! You are right, I think there are words that are pronounced differently depending on where you live, caviar is probably one of those words! lol. I think I’m over-sensitive to reading any lines monotone so when I hear it my ears perk up as something to never do, but that may only apply to how I’m reading things. So much to learn! 🙂

          Mary

  • #59356
    [email protected]
    Participant

    Hi! Lookingforward to your feedback on this Cheerios commercial.

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    • #59469
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Your tone fit the script very well! Nice job on the pacing, and clarity. Keep it up! — Kathy

    • #59401
      sabpierotti
      Participant

      Good job! The only comment I have is I heard a lot of echo and background noise in your read. Not sure if this was music you were adding to the read or not? Also, it doesn’t sound like your recording space is sound proof. I suggest finding a small space in your home that has a lot of soft materials to absorb your sound. I literally record in my tiny closet haha! Keep up the good work.

      • #59425
        [email protected]
        Participant

        Thank you so much for your feedback! You’re right I am not in a sound proof zone, will go to my closet next time! 🙂

    • #59367
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Juliees! Good energy throughout the read! I can tell you have a smile in your delivery, sounds nice for this genre. Good job!

      Mary

  • #59346
    sabpierotti
    Participant

    Hi, everyone! I auditioned for a Meal Prep national TV commercial… let me know what you think!

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 9 months ago by sabpierotti.
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    • #59468
      kfvoice
      Participant

      This was a good read, sabpierotti! Good luck!

      I agree with Mary about the overall performance of the read. My comments are on the audio/technical end.

      I heard a “static” sound between the first and second sentence. It was faint, but I could hear it with my headphones. And the plosive around the :11 mark was a little overpowering compared to the rest of the read. Nothing that a little editing can’t fix.

      Looking forward to hearing more!

      Kathy

    • #59372
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Sabpierotti! Nice read! I like the clarity, tone and pacing, and with pauses in the right places to help the listener get the message. Good job!

      Mary

      • #59397
        sabpierotti
        Participant

        Thanks for the feedback, Mary!

        • #59459
          mkell755
          Participant

          You are welcome!

          Mary

  • #59348
    sabpierotti
    Participant

    Hi, all! I recently auditioned for a regional tv commercial. Let me know what you think!

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    • #59467
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Nice read! Good pacing, and variation in pitch and tone. The only part that was not clear to me was the name of the school before university. I hope this helps. Overall, a good job!

      Kathy

    • #59373
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Sabpierotti! Nice job. You sounded very authentic and invested in the script. You have a nice warm tone which is good for this genre. Great!

      Mary

  • #59342
    katelyndawnvo
    Participant

    Working on sounding more informative than happy, and more natural and spontaneous. Any feedback is appreciated! Trying to find where I fit naturally with narration and I love history and travel.

    Travelogue: Egypt has always been a land of mystery and magic.
    A land different from all others, difficult to understand, apart and alien, yet strangely fascinating.
    It was the most self-contained of all the countries of the ancient world;
    it lived its own life, practiced its own religion, and made up its own government with hardly any outside interference either from or upon other civilizations.

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    • #59499
      chas82
      Participant

      Hi K – Overall, I liked how you used pitch variation to add variety and I also thought your fluidity was nice throughout. And I totally agree with the other comments about having a connection to the topic as you do in this case makes the read easier and more natural rather than “just reading a script”. I think your connection is a large part of what made it appealing. I also thought the second half of your read was the best because it sounded more natural and conversational than the first due to you picking up the tempo. Just to give you a sense of the difference, you read the first half at just under 2 words/second and the second half at 2.7 words/second. The second half sounded like I imagine you sound when having a conversation with a friend. Nice work on this.

      Chas

      • #59609
        katelyndawnvo
        Participant

        Thank you for taking the time to even count my words/minutes! I totally hear whatt you mean. Thank you for the feedback!

    • #59466
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Hi Katelyn!

      This was a good read. Nice job on varying your pitch with the lists! I agree, perhaps try slowing down just a tad, and see how it sounds.

      There is a lot to explore with narration, I agree. It is true, anything that you find interesting, or love to do, seems to be easier in connecting to a copy. Your voice would fit this niche within narration nicely.

      Keep it up!

      Kathy

    • #59374
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Katelyn! This was good. It felt a tiny bit rushed to me between sentences but overall was very clear and flowed really well. Your voice is naturally friendly and happy-sounding and that’s a good thing! I think you can be friendly and informative, and it actually helps the read too if you are interested in the topic, which you appear to be. Keep it up!

      Mary

  • #59338
    SFish
    Participant

    Some commercial practice – thanks for your help!

    This is a happy belly. This is too. And so is this. At Happy Family, we’re on mission to keep them that way. It’s why our delicious organic yogurt is made without any added sweeteners, because that adorable belly is sweet enough already. Introducing Happy Baby and Happy Tot whole milk yogurt with probiotics. Because happy starts on the inside.

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    • #59465
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Hi S! Nice read! I could hear the happiness shine through! Good job! Keep it up! — Kathy

    • #59438
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Very nice. Voice and tone works very well with this.

    • #59403
      sabpierotti
      Participant

      Great read!!! Sounded very genuine and conversational. Very natural read for you!

    • #59378
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi SFish! Really nice! I like how warm and sweet your voice sounds, seems really good for this genre. Very clear and good pacing and pauses throughout. Very good!

      Mary

    • #59341
      katelyndawnvo
      Participant

      Very nice read! I really liked your sweet warm tone and your voice definitely fits the copy. Perhaps could flow a little bit better from sentence to sentence. I struggle with this myself. I stop between phrases to breathe and then I edit it shorter later but sometimes not short enough. That is really my only thought listening to it. I think you did great!

  • #59330
    RYoung
    Participant

    Any comments are welcome!
    History Channel
    If you lived before our time, who would you be?
    Would you fight your brother for the rights of another? Who would you be?
    Would you find new dreams or create wonders?
    What if you could choose from a 1,000 yesterdays; a 1,000 lives, when the past was today and the new took your breath away.
    Who would you be? What would you feel? How would you live? Who would you love?
    Remembering every generation before us;
    Remembering for generations to come.
    The History Channel. Where the past comes alive.

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 9 months ago by RYoung.
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    • #59464
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Hi R! Nice read; clear enunciation. Music fits well for the script. It did seem a tad louder in spots to me, and in competition with your voice. I agree with the other comment in that it could be read just a little slower.

    • #59379
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi RYoung! Great reading and production. Great pauses throughout, which gives the listener time to think after each question. Your voice sounds really good for this genre! Great job!

      Mary

    • #59336
      SFish
      Participant

      You have a really fantastic voice! It’s very clear and has a lot of character and weight. The pacing on this read seems a little fast to me, and I think it might help to ask the questions as though you expect to get an answer. Thanks for posting!

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