Feedback Forum
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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Hey everyone! I gave my last commercial another try with the feedback given. More enthusiasm being the main adjustment. Please let me know how I did! Thank you.
Trendi.com
Trendi.com. It’s the #1 shopping site for top name brands at up to 75% off. Great style, great value and everything ships free. Trendi.com. Everything you love, for less.-
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Hi Monibr16, really nice! Great enthusiasm and energy, sounds great! I believe I heard the previous version and this one is much improved. Good job!
Mary
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Hello all! Here is a recording for any and all feedback. Let me know what you think! Thanks,
Mary
Chico’s
Chico’s was founded in 1983 as a small boutique selling Mexican folk art on Sanibel Island in Florida. Then one day, our founders discovered the sweater that made literally everyone look fabulous. They then quickly pivoted the business, and retail was never the same. Now there are over 600 Chico’s boutiques nationwide.From our exclusive, private-label designs to our most amazing personal service, Chico’s is truly a unique retail environment. When you walk into any Chico’s store, you can depend upon the sales staff to coordinate, accessorize, and help you build a wardrobe to suit your needs. We’re moving fast, but not without you. Get yourself to Chico’s!
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Hi Mary,
I thoroughly enjoyed listening to your recording. Among the tips that I will take away are your enthusiasm, conversational tone, and relaxed voice. I felt that I was not being rushed through a script. In fact, I forgot that I was listening to a script. Rather, by giving me the time to absorb the story of Chico’s, you were piquing my interest in the company.
Kind regards,
John
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Mary,
That was good. I think the pace could have been a little faster. The last was sentence really was natural and flowing. Keep up the good work.
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Hi Mary! Good read! I liked the last sentence, I could really hear the enthusiasm there. I think you could add that flair to the earlier parts as well.
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Hi Mary, I liked the pacing of your read. Also you hit key words very well. In addition I like how you differentiated “coordinate, accesorize, and help” . The only critique I have is, I heard a pause in the first sentence of the second paragraph,”private label designs to our”. But overall you did a good job.
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Hi there! Here is one of the spots that will be on my narration demo as a corporate explainer piece! I’m going for straightforward and confident. Any feedback is welcome!
Katelyn
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Happy New Year all! Good to be back at it. I’ll be testing out and practising some possible scripts for my commercial demo reel here. Below is the first. I appreciate all feedback (script, performance, suitability for my voice, sound quality, etc.) Thanks in advance!
Toque
Script:
Bundle your family up and join us on the hill! Fresh powder, challenging elevations, breathtaking views and
friendly staff are waiting for you at Sir Sam’s Ski & Ride, in Haliburton. -
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Happy New Year!! I hope everyone had a lovely holiday. Here is a little read about beavers! Any feedback is appreciated.
Beavers:
The b****r builds its lodge out of twigs and sticks; as freezing weather nears, they plaster their lodge with mud, making a concrete layer that no predator can break through. During the early nineteenth century, the b****r pelt was the single most valuable commodity; the pelt being used for robes, coats, clothing trims, and top hats. -
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Hi everyone! Here is a recording for any and all feedback on one of my favorite topics, beer! Let me know what you think. Authentic? Conversational? Thanks!
Mary
Sam Adams – Cold Snap
We all know it’s the coldest time of the year, but we’re ready to fight back with the bold flavors of Cold Snap. This Sam Adams seasonal is only available from January through March, so you’d better start stocking up. This lively unfiltered White Ale gets a kick from a bright blend of spring spices. Orange and lemon zest, vanilla, rose hips, hibiscus, plum and grains of paradise add subtle sweetness, while coriander contributes a peppery bite, creating that refreshing crisp flavor that signals spring is on its way. Sam Adams Cold Snap – embrace the cold!-
Hi Mary. I agree with the other feedback – good overall; still need to add some energy so that I believe you are super into this beer! Also re: the comments about more variation in the list. I felt the pause right before the list may have been a tad too long as well. Keep up the great work! Toque.
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Hi Mary!
Maybe a little more emphasis on “Cold Snap” in the opening line, and “This Sam Adams seasonal…” in the next line? I could hear your pitch and tone change some with the list of seasonal spices, but it could vary a little more. The list read did flow well, to me, so good job there.
Good job, overall. Keep it up!
P.S. Since you like beer, try a read for Rolling Rock? The bottle phrasing might be an interesting read. 🙂
Kathy
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Mary, good read overall. Still could have use a little more energy and tone changes for the list of spring spices: Orange and lemon zest etc. Also one word change suttle instead of subtle. Over all good read. I will admit that would be a hard sell to me. I am not real big on fruity beers. Every now and then I find a good craft beer but few and far between. I have learned my lesson and ask for a taste before I drop $8 plus on a pint of beer. Eventhough I worked my way through college at the Budweiser Distributor in Wichita Falls, I generally stick with Dos Equis (Green bottle) if available these days. If I want something sweet I will order something like a margarita, lol. Good job overall!!!!
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Hi Robert, thanks for the feedback! I will work on more energy and tone changes.
Actually Cold Snap has more of a crisper than a fruity taste; even with the spices. I like fruity / sours too, but this one is different. Some day you will have to try a taste! Flights are the best, I agree I would not want to waste a full pour on something bad (like most IPAs for me). Dos Equis are drinkable, as are margaritas!! Cheers!
Mary
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Uploading my homework for review. I did two different tones for each ad (as per instruction). It’s not perfect, but let me know what you think!
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Great design challenges more than just the eyes. It challenges the future. We designed the RDX to challenge not just the future of SUVs, but also the future of Acura. The future starts now. The future is the Acura RDX.
Acura. Everything we ever imagined. And then some.2>
What you wear to bed is your business. So if you’re sleeping in your contact lenses, ask-your-eye-doctor about Air Optix Night & Day Aqua contact lenses. They’re FDA approved for-up-to 30 days and nights of continuous wear and are the most breathable soft contact lenses available. Because bedtime is your time.
Air Optix Night & Day Aqua contact lenses.-
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1st script: The first read was too slow and some extra long pauses. The firs use of future your tone varied but was the same for all of the other times it was used. The second read was quite a bit better once again the first future had a tone change but all others were same. But agree with Mary 2nd read was much easier to listen to and suited your voice much better.
2nd script: 1st read wording Used contacts instead of contact lenses. You said doctor in both reads instead of eye-doctor. The were a couple of wording mistakes. I also think the second read was better and was more conversational.
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Hi Amitofu, good reads! I liked how you varied up both sets of reads with tone and pacing.
Script 1 take 1: This was interesting and had some good dramatic pauses, which went with the low tone.
Script 1 take 2: I preferred this one, the tone was a little smoother and it seemed to flow better. It was more encouraging to the listener.
Script 2 take 1: Good read. There were a couple of missed words (I realize this is practice, but it’s just something I noticed).
Script 2 take 2: I preferred this one, again the tone was a little more uplifting, the pacing smoother and there was more variation throughout. There were some different missed words in this read. Overall very good for all!Mary
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Hello everyone! I hope you all enjoyed the holidays. I’ve been out of practice for a couple of weeks so I’m ready to jump back in things. I did a quick, one take practice recording for you guys. I might sound a little stuffy from allergies so I do apologize. Any feedback is greatly appreciated!
At Rubios, we thought our seafood needed a catchy saying. Something like, want to feel nice? Eat seafood twice. We quickly realized we’re better at flavorful, grilled seafood than we are at at catchy sayings.
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Hi Svenbot, I like this and welcome back! Great conversational tone and you had a nice smile in your voice. Very good!
Mary
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Hello!
This is three versions of the same practice script for E-Learning, I’m looking for any tips for improvement, which script sounds the best, or pieces of them that I could incorporate into a new read.
Thank you very much“Welcome to the Introduction to Axial Spondyloarthritis Course.
The bones of the human body are divided into two groups, the appendicular skeleton and the axial skeleton. We’re going to focus on the axial skeleton which includes the bones of the head, vertebral column, thorax, and trunk.”-
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Hi FCabral, very nice reads! You have really good clarity and enunciation and a nice warm voice which makes it nice and relaxing to listen to and learn from. I listened to all 3 twice each, and I could not tell a huge difference between them. I guess I will say the third version is my favorite, because it has just a little more variation in tone, especially for the opening line, which would help to draw in the listener. Really good job!
Mary
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EDGE LIBRARY DOCUMENTARY: Unequal Protection: How Corporations Became “People” – And How You Can Fight Back By Thom Hartmann
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Wow! Great job. flawless as far as I’m concerned.
If I’m scraping the bottom of the barrel for a single complaint (or in other words, just for posterity) I’d say
[0:39 secs] “Instead it payed a 1.2 billion dollar fine for[…]” – Billion came out with the tiny-est ‘buh’ sound instead of ‘bil’
But again, that’s me STRUGGLING to find something wrong. Outstanding Job! -
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