Feedback Forum
- This topic has 10,047 replies, 724 voices, and was last updated 1 week, 1 day ago by
micpri53.
-
CreatorTopic
-
August 7, 2020 at 9:27 am #15468
David Goldberg
Edge Studio StaffHi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
-
This topic was modified 4 years, 8 months ago by
David Goldberg.
-
This topic was modified 4 years, 5 months ago by
David Goldberg.
-
This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
-
This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
-
This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
-
This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by
David Goldberg.
-
This topic was modified 4 years, 8 months ago by
-
CreatorTopic
-
AuthorReplies
-
January 7, 2021 at 5:33 pm #60971
Toque
ParticipantHi again all. Another practice script. This one just taken from the Edge Script Library. As always, appreciate any feedback on any and all aspects of the read/recording. Thanks! Toque
Progressive Insurance
Every year James Ward buys his mom the same birthday cake. But this
year, James switched to Progressive auto insurance. And if they can
shake things up by letting you compare competitors rates and over 20
other facts and figures-then maybe he too should swing for the fences.
Nice work James. Think easier. Think Progressive.Attachments:
You must be logged in to view attached files.-
January 8, 2021 at 5:57 pm #61044
Erik B
ParticipantHi Toque, I liked this read. The tone variation throughout the read was great. Also the read had a good pace to it. Good job.
-
January 8, 2021 at 8:10 am #61019
John Trape
ParticipantHi Toque,
Fully agree with Mary’s feedback. I decided to listen, without following the script. Your calm, engaging delivery held my attention, and I wanted to hear what you had to say.
A very nice way to start the day!Kind regards,
John
-
January 8, 2021 at 12:42 am #61012
mkell755
ParticipantHi Toque, nice work! I liked this one a lot. Great enthusiasm, enunciation and tone variation throughout. Good smile in your voice and emphasis on Progressive. Good job!
Mary
-
-
January 7, 2021 at 5:17 pm #60964
mrgenadry
ParticipantHi there, folks. My first ever recording post. Let me know what you think. Have a great 2021!
Benjamin Moore – “Love”
This may sound trite, or cliche.
And maybe if we were talking about chocolate and flowers, it would be.
But we’re talking about paint, so hear us out.
Love is an amazing thing. It has the power to change everything.
A love of craft can turn work and labor into an act of creative expression.
Love can make you see past obvious flaws in a facade, to the beauty underneath.
Love can turn a pair of hands into a set of tools.
Love can turn pigment and polymers into magical liquid.
Love can turn a house into a home.
And turn a bunch of homes into a community.
Love can transform. And when you want your love to transform a home…
There is no other paint than Benjamin Moore.-
This reply was modified 4 years, 2 months ago by
mrgenadry.
Attachments:
You must be logged in to view attached files.-
January 8, 2021 at 12:09 pm #61024
John Trape
ParticipantHi MrGenadry! I thoroughly enjoyed listening to your recording and then absorbing Mary’s and Toque’s observations. A particularly useful exercise for me, being new to the game, so to speak. I felt that you had really spent time interpreting the script, and that you knew exactly how you wished to connect with your intended audience. You should be pretty pleased!
Kind regards,
John
-
January 8, 2021 at 12:54 am #61013
mkell755
ParticipantHi MrGenadry! Welcome to the forum! This is a good genre for you. You have a nice warm voice and good enunciation. I liked the pauses throughout too, helps the listener consider what is being said. I agree with Toque in that the word “love” because it repeated so many times might be good to vary up in tone now and then. Overall really good. keep up the good work!
Mary
-
January 7, 2021 at 5:43 pm #60977
Toque
ParticipantHi there! You have a good voice for this kind of read! Audio quality sounded fine to me. Just a few other comments: 1) If the script says “talking, and not “talkin'”, you may want to consider fully pronouncing it. Of course it’s hard to say without any direction added to the script.2) Because the word “Love” is repeated a number of times, you may want to consider some slight variation in how each is delivered. I believe you made a change for the last one, but the others sounded very similar. 3) In the second-last line, the pause between the words “transform” and “And” feels overly long. Great work! Hope this helps. Toque
-
This reply was modified 4 years, 2 months ago by
-
January 7, 2021 at 3:44 pm #60955
chas82
ParticipantHappy & Safe New Year to all !! It’s been a little while but now I’m back in the saddle. My current focus is on whiskey Commercials. I’m starting with two I found for Jack Daniel’s. Still working on creating the recording space but any and all feedback appreciated.
JD #1
In Lynchburg, Tennessee, you can park in the middle of the road to talk with a neighbor about taxes or the weather. You can pick enough wild blackberries to fill a tin bucket. And you can see a distillery where Jack Daniel made whiskey way back in 1866. We still make it in a slow, deliberate fashion, much as he did. One sip, and you’ll be glad to know we don’t ever plan to stop. Jack Daniel’s … smooth sippin’ Tennessee whiskey.JD#2
Giving the right gift is easy. Just follow these simple steps.
First, pick up a bottle of Jack Daniel’s Tennessee Whiskey.
Now, the size ya choose depends on who it’s for. Say, your boss, a friend or a brother.
Second, get some wrapping paper and ribbon. It’s kinda like wrappin’ a tennis racket. They’re gonna know what it is, but that’s part of the charm.
And last, and most important, step three. Be there when they open it.Attachments:
You must be logged in to view attached files.-
January 8, 2021 at 12:58 am #61014
mkell755
ParticipantHi Chas – really nice! I like the deep rasp and range in your voice, it is perfect for a whiskey commercial. Nice variation in tone throughout for both scripts and really nice pacing and enunciation too. Good smile in your voice. Good job!
Mary
-
January 7, 2021 at 5:57 pm #60986
Toque
ParticipantHi Chas. Script #1 was great. The only thing I noted was (and this may just be my ears) but in the first 2 seconds of the recording it kinda sounded like it started at one volume and then jumped up to something a tad louder? Script # 2 sounded great. Whisky ads area great choice for your voice. Toque
-
-
January 7, 2021 at 2:32 pm #60949
SuperLuke
ParticipantGood to be back everyone and happy New Year! I’ve got a new microphone and was wondering how my performance and recording quality are. I’m really trying to eliminate the unwanted humming and hissing from my previous performances.
All feedback welcome
Attachments:
You must be logged in to view attached files.-
January 8, 2021 at 1:02 am #61016
mkell755
ParticipantHi Luke! I too am having a hard time hearing almost anything, except a few words that are louder than the others now and then, with volume on max. Can you try re-recording and reloading?
Mary
-
January 7, 2021 at 6:00 pm #60988
Toque
ParticipantHi Luke. The recording volume is super-low. I can barely hear that there’s someone talking. Toque
-
January 10, 2021 at 5:53 pm #61110
-
-
-
January 7, 2021 at 9:46 am #60932
burdahgirl
ParticipantPractice Script from the Edge Library. I’d love any feedback, THANKS!
American Express
Do you know me? Probably not. In my business, recognition is always important, but when I’m buying goods online I prefer a little privacy. With Private Payments from American Express, I get the security of a unique number created for each business transaction I make. Because my private information is my business, and American Express keeps it that way.Attachments:
You must be logged in to view attached files.-
January 7, 2021 at 11:34 pm #61003
mkell755
ParticipantHi Burdagirl, very good! The variation in tone and the pacing were great. It sounded very natural and authentic for this script. I liked the emphasis on Private Payments as it appears to me like it’s the highlighted product / point of the commercial. Very good job!
Mary
-
January 7, 2021 at 5:50 pm #60982
Erik B
ParticipantHi Burdahgirl. The pacing of your read was very good. I noticed the overemphasis on “private payments”. To help “get out of your head” step away from the mic, before reading a sentence with a troublesome word or words, raise your arms to your side and take two deep breathes, then go back to the mic and deliver the line. Overall good job.
-
January 7, 2021 at 5:03 pm #60963
mrgenadry
ParticipantReally good read! One thing that’s helped me with commercial copy is to imagine the script as the middle of the conversation, not the beginning. Either you’re telling someone something they don’t know, or they’ve just told you something with which you disagree. This can elevate your excitement and increase the energy of the read.
In this case, I would imagine that you’re making small talk with a new client about a recent experience with identity theft. They’ve heard of Private Payments, but they thought it sounded like BS. So the question “Do you know me?” can be a little more authoritative; you both already know the answer is no. Then, accent the contrast: “In my BUSINESS, recognition is always important.” Changing that opening motivation might help you keep the urgency up throughout the read.
Best of luck!
-
January 7, 2021 at 2:12 pm #60943
SuperLuke
ParticipantGood performance and recording quality. It can get better though. When you say “private payments”, I hear you stepping out of character, forcing the “P” sound. hope this was a helpful critique
-
January 7, 2021 at 2:14 pm #60944
burdahgirl
ParticipantThanks, that is helpful. I struggle so hard with my plosive ‘p’s and was attempting to not have them pop so much. But I totally agree they sound weird. Thanks for the critique!
-
-
-
January 6, 2021 at 11:49 pm #60917
mkell755
ParticipantHello all! Here is a recording (done on my phone) for any and all feedback. Let me know what you think. Thank you!!
Mary
Shelly’s Interiors
Are there times when you feel like you live in a boring, grey box? Well, it’s time to break out of the crypt with a fresh coat of paint and interior decorating services from Shelly’s Interiors!Within hours, your home will be transformed to reflect your tastes. Don’t know what your taste is? No problem. Shelly’s Interiors has a wide array of styles in their portfolio to choose from, including Modern Chic, Urban Elegance, and Rural Escape.
To get a preview, visit Shelleysinteriors.com. From there you can browse styles, then give us a call at 555-5455 or send us an email from the website to set up a consultation. Shelly’s Interiors – turning houses into homes since 1990.
Attachments:
You must be logged in to view attached files.-
January 7, 2021 at 3:40 pm #60954
rogue1
ParticipantHi Mary, there’s a real warmth to your voice which I find very appealing. Continue to expand upon that lovely sincerity by perhaps leaning into an even more conversational in your delivery (more like a chat with a friend than a read from a script—-a naturalness I’m working to perfect myself). As others mentioned, I do hear a technical hum in the background, but a solid read! Definitely have the perfect aural temperament for the client.
-
January 7, 2021 at 9:41 am #60930
burdahgirl
ParticipantHey Mary! I haven’t been on the forum for a few weeks – you are CRUSHING the smile in the voice! Congrats!!
-
January 7, 2021 at 11:25 pm #60998
mkell755
ParticipantHi Burdahgirl, thank you for your feedback! I’m glad you can tell a difference!! Progress – YEAH! 🙂
Mary
-
January 7, 2021 at 2:17 pm #60945
SuperLuke
ParticipantHi Mary, aside from the ringing sound by your phone, you were able to record yourself pretty good. But I think you can perform better than that. Let the smile be in your voice and don’t force anything in or hold you back from creating the perfect performance
-
January 7, 2021 at 11:24 pm #60997
mkell755
ParticipantThanks for the feedback SuperLuke! Yes, I’m starting to work on the setup in my studio, I never noticed the buzzing / humming of the fan on my computer until I started voiceover! I will continue to work on the smile in my voice and pushing the performance more, just trying to not cross the line of ridiculousness! Sounds like I have a ways to go 🙂 Thank you!
Mary
-
-
-
-
January 6, 2021 at 8:15 pm #60906
ChristyPark
ParticipantHello all!
I’d love feedback on this Physical Therapy VO audition. There are 60 1-2 min spots like this and it would be super to contribute! I recorded in my newly tech approved in home booth. Thanks for your insight.
Attachments:
You must be logged in to view attached files.-
January 7, 2021 at 9:45 am #60931
burdahgirl
ParticipantHey Christy! Great voice, I agree with Mary, you have an awesome voice for this genre. The setup sounded good, although there was a little hum through my headphones. I don’t know enough about sound to know if it was an issue on my end, though! The read was fantastic, and I could absolutely imagine doing PT with that recording. Question: is the breathing instructive in the read? Like something the patient should do with you? The breathing was very noticeable so I thought maybe it was meant to be included. If it is not instructive, I might silence some of them, especially the one at the beginning. I’m a noob, so take all of that with a grain of salt!
-
January 7, 2021 at 5:19 pm #60965
ChristyPark
ParticipantThanks so much, I took the breaths out before submitting. I appreciate this feedback!
-
-
January 6, 2021 at 11:15 pm #60912
mkell755
ParticipantHi Christy, you have a great voice for this genre. It sounded calm and reassuring. I’m not fully set up yet with my studio but the sound quality sounds good on my end. Good job!
Mary
-
-
January 6, 2021 at 7:42 pm #60904
svenbot5000
ParticipantHowdy ya’ll! Back at it again, I just wanted to read this one because it looked stupid. I’d love any feedback!
Uncle
I’m going to let you kids in a little secret, I’m not really your Uncle i killed him and stuffed him under the floorboards HA HA HA HA HA HA Ehh I’m just kidding I’m, I’m probably your Uncle
Attachments:
You must be logged in to view attached files.-
January 7, 2021 at 5:56 pm #60985
Erik B
ParticipantHowdy Svenbot, I liked the read, you had the sinister tone down. The only suggestion I have is to not rush it. Good job.
-
January 7, 2021 at 3:46 pm #60958
rogue1
ParticipantHi Svenbot, Wow, you’ve definitely got character to spare! If I were to suggest any tweaking it would be to let your read breathe a bit, no reason to rush, let the listener enjoy your voice. Specifically, perhaps a slight pause after “I’m going to let you kids in on a little secret” to build the tension, and definitely a shade more pause on your comic timing before you stick that (killer) ending. Great work!
-
January 6, 2021 at 11:17 pm #60913
mkell755
ParticipantHi Svenbot – that was really creepy good! I liked the character voice, very convincing! I was chuckling on that one. Good job!
Mary
-
-
January 6, 2021 at 11:15 am #60895
John Trape
ParticipantGood Afternoon and Happy New Year everyone! This is the first recording that I have submitted to the Feedback Forum and I would very much appreciate your feedback. The script is drawn from the Edge Practice Script Library.
Thank you,
John
John Trapé
Albert Einstein
Albert Einstein was a genius, and one of the greatest physicists of all time. His famous Theories of Relativity, which describe the relationship between mass and energy, and between space and time, were published in 1905 and 1916. Einstein was born of Jewish parents in Ulm, Germany. He spent many years in Switzerland, becoming a Swiss citizen in 1901, and gaining his Doctor of Philosophy degree in 1905 from Zurich University. It was while employed as a patent clerk in Berne that he published his first Theory of Relativity. This contained his famous equation: E=mc2, which explains the relationship between mass and energy.
Attachments:
You must be logged in to view attached files.-
January 6, 2021 at 11:26 pm #60914
mkell755
ParticipantHi John, first of all welcome! That was very nice. Your voice sounds really good for this genre. You enunciation is very clear and your voice is nice and warm, and the pacing was great too. I’m getting the Terrence Stamp impression from your voice (actor in “Yes Man” and many other movies) – that is a compliment! The only tiny critique I could find is the pronunciation of the word “clerk” sounded like “clark” to me, small thing. Keep up the good work!
Mary
-
January 7, 2021 at 7:52 am #60928
John Trape
ParticipantHi Mary,
Thank you very much for your feedback. Following my first practice session with Art, he told me to focus on enunciation, to avoid suppressing words, and to pay attention to pacing. So, your comments are really encouraging. And, yes, I will need to be careful about my pronunciation.
Kind regards,
John
-
January 7, 2021 at 2:28 pm #60948
SuperLuke
ParticipantWow! This is a great performance/ narration performance.
-
January 8, 2021 at 7:55 am #61018
John Trape
ParticipantHi Luke,
Thank you very much for your encouragement.
Kind regards,
John
-
-
-
-
January 6, 2021 at 2:02 am #60888
monibr16
ParticipantHey everyone! I gave my last commercial another try with the feedback given. More enthusiasm being the main adjustment. Please let me know how I did! Thank you.
Trendi.com
Trendi.com. It’s the #1 shopping site for top name brands at up to 75% off. Great style, great value and everything ships free. Trendi.com. Everything you love, for less.Attachments:
You must be logged in to view attached files.-
January 8, 2021 at 12:59 am #61015
kfvoice
Participantmonibr16 — Nice job! I could hear the difference and improvement from your last read. Keep it up!
-
January 6, 2021 at 11:28 pm #60915
mkell755
ParticipantHi Monibr16, really nice! Great enthusiasm and energy, sounds great! I believe I heard the previous version and this one is much improved. Good job!
Mary
-
-
AuthorReplies
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.