Feedback Forum

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  • #15468
    David Goldberg
    Edge Studio Staff

    The Edge Studio Feedback Forum is the best place for you to post a recording and get feedback from the community! Record in your home studio, upload the file, and see what people think. This is a great place to get some advice on your technique, on your home studio, or to ask for people’s opinion on your reads. Remember, that this is a community forum, so please remain positive and encourage your peers in helpful ways. If Edge Studio feels that a user is too negative, or antagonizing other members of the community, they will have their posts deleted, and risk being banned from further communication. 

    Stay positive, listen to each other, and have fun!

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  • #60622
    Robert Broussard
    Participant

    A different type of script for commercial in scripts library. Thanks for you feedback.

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    • #60654
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Robert, good job! I agree with what Brian is saying – maybe vary the tone on “now if he could only operate the microwave” to give a little more contrast to how simple this new thing is making his life, if that makes sense. Overall very good, and it seems like a good genre for you.

      Mary

      • #60656
        Robert Broussard
        Participant

        Thanks Mary, I agree that part should have changed tone. I am trying use a lower voice some just to see how it works. Bye the way my microwave is complicated to. I am glad there is a 30s button on it. lol.

        • #60710
          mkell755
          Participant

          Hi Robert, I commented on your re-recorded version above, good job! Our microwave is plenty complicated too – lol 🙂

    • #60630
      BrianWigginsVO
      Participant

      First, I love how you pronounce “theater”…that’s a hard one to pull off and sound natural, but I think you did it.

      The first item on the list about his IQ is a little muddled, so maybe a little more enunciation there. And with this list, it needs contrast: here’s a really smart guy who, before now, was stymied by his home theater, but this new product makes it so he’s able to do this thing. As it stands, it’s all delivered in kind of the same tone and urgency…give these list items some more color and contrast so that that last item stands out.

      • #60636
        Robert Broussard
        Participant

        Brian, thanks for the feedback. I am trying to go for a very voice there. I think it would be better to change the pitch some as you suggested. Happy New Year.

  • #60619
    Robert Broussard
    Participant

    Another John Deere Script I put together. Getting ready to do commerical Demo.

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    • #60665
      monibr16
      Participant

      So believable and the pacing was great!Nice job Robert!

    • #60655
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Robert, very good recording and production! I really like John Deere for you, it sounds very authentic and natural. Good pace and decisive tone. Very good!

      Mary

  • #60570
    kfvoice
    Participant

    Okay, I did something different for tonight. It’s definitely narration, but I channeled my inner Rachel Ray for this totally off-the-cuff ad-lib for a real cocktail recipe. Hey, it’s the New Year! 🙂

    So this might be more on air improv, and I broke all the VO rules, but hey… it was fun. Let me know what you think!

    I have included the original draft script I put together, too, so you can see just how much the audio compares to the original script. I actually skipped a step, and I was bummed, but it allowed me to figure out how to copy and paste in Audacity! Yay!

    I am (now) aware I said ‘orange liquor’ instead of ‘orange liqueur’. I can edit that, now that I know how to. 🙂 I also dipped down on the very last word of the last sentence, too. Unlike other parts of the read, I did not plan that, lol — but I was not doing it over! If you are curious, this was my third take, but first take of the entire script. I messed up in the very beginning on the first couple of tries.

    Thank you for any feedback! Happy New Year! Cheers!

    Kathy

    French 75 Tutorial

    Happy New Year!

    Let’s celebrate with a classic cocktail — the French 75!

    Here’s how to make it:

    The first thing you are going to do is add one ounce of gin into your shaker … followed by half an ounce of simple syrup … and three-quarter ounce lemon juice.

    Add some ice, and shake well … now fine strain into a flute … slowly top off with Champaign … and finally garnish with a lemon twist … and that’s how you make a French 75!

    Another version is to substitute the Champaign with sparkling wine. Whatever floats your bubbles…

    Cheers, my friends!

    Here’s to new beginnings…

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    • #60961
      rogue1
      Participant

      Hi Kathy, You have lovely, inviting voice. Totally feel that you’re casually leaning over the counter showing me, person-to-person, how to make the perfect French 75. (Watch out, Rachael Ray). Great on-air improv, though I feel some of your confidence diminishes when you get to the off-script comic asides (you tend to drop out almost altogether—both aurally and energetically—when you’re joking about this being the most expensive cocktail you’ve…bought…ever). You’re a natural at this, just feel free to infuse that fun energy all the way through your read and don’t shy away from the asides (or slow your breezy pace with too many hanging pauses). Well done!

      • #61017
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Thank you, rogue! I appreciate you taking the time to listen, and providing feedback — noted!

    • #60631
      BrianWigginsVO
      Participant

      As was mentioned above, a very “podcast” vibe for me, but that is an absolute compliment…that’s a podcast I would listen to, and your tone is so conversational that the “vo rules” being broken don’t even matter. And frankly, I think that would make for an amazing commercial for one of the liquors or the glasses or something…it really draws the listener in when it’s real, and not “real”, you know?

      • #60647
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Thank you, Brian, for the compliment! I absolutely get what what you mean about real vs. “real”, and I agree. Thanks, again!

        Kathy

    • #60600
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Kathy – that was really fun! I could tell you were having a good time as you were going through the steps – very casual and entertaining! I found myself not really focusing on each word as it was written (as I tend to do), but more enjoying listening, and I think that’s a very good thing we should all strive for. I like the podcast vibe for you! Very good fit. I like the idea of explaining how to do things myself, maybe I’ll give it a try too. Explaining how to do something probably triggers something different in your brain than performing or selling or acting, just my thoughts on that. Very good job!

      Mary

      • #60609
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Thank you, Mary!

        Podcasting does let you have more free rein, so to speak, this is true. There is not as much pressure to follow the rules, and to be yourself, while still performing and acting a little — like I did here. Clarity/enunciation/pronunciation is still important, but I did this on a whim. Give it a try!

        Happy New Year!

        Kathy

        • This reply was modified 3 years, 8 months ago by kfvoice.
    • #60577
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Ugh … *slaps forehead* … another edit: *Rachael* Ray.

      If there are any more… I blame the late night hour.

    • #60576
      kfvoice
      Participant

      *edit: Champagne

      Note: Champagne *is* sparkling wine, but not *all* sparkling wine is Champagne.

    • #60574
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Kathy I liked that. It is good to be comfortable talking into the mic like that. I have been working on podcast and put a script together and read it out just to get used to speaking. It is a skill to be able to talk into a mic with no one on the other side and make it sound like you are speaking to someone. I have had a fancy to get into talk radio myself. Anyway, that was good. I think I will make me a gin and Spite Zero to toast your recording.😊 Happy New Year!

      • #60578
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Thanks Robert! Have one for me (right now), lol! I am making “75’s” later for the ball drop…

        It really was pretty fun, but I can’t seem to replicate that casualness in my sessions, or other readings. I am sure it will get easier.

        I, too, have had podcasts cross my mind. Not sure what, or if I actually would. Time will tell. Good luck to you in that pursuit! Keep us posted!

        Happy New Year!

  • #60563
    Robert Broussard
    Participant

    Trying out a new script I put together. Thanks for any suggestions or feedback. Getting close to putting my demo together. Happy New Year to everyone, lets hope this on is MUCH better than 2020.

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    • #60601
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Robert, sounds great! I like John Deere for you, flowed well and sounded very natural. Good music in the background too. Good job on that and Happy New Year!

      Mary

      • #60658
        Robert Broussard
        Participant

        Thanks Mary, Happy New Year to you and your family as well.

    • #60573
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Robert — Awesome! Sounds ready to me! Nice pacing, pitch, and tone. Great choice of music, too — the volume seemed just about right starting out, but then it seemed to compete with your voice. Is it just me?

      Kathy

      • #60575
        Robert Broussard
        Participant

        Thanks Kathy, I do wonder about the background volume. I left it a point or two high on this one to make cutting the grass a little festive.

  • #60560
    mkell755
    Participant

    Hello all! Here is a recording for any and all feedback (recorded on my phone). I’m working on sounding conversational and making sure I pronounce all the “for”s and “to”s vs. “fer” and “teh”s. Let me know what you think about it, it’s a hard habit to correct for me! 🙂

    Mary

    Cabelas
    Like you, we can’t get enough of the outdoors. It’s in our blood. It’s in our work. It’s in our nature®. So, when you buy Cabelas branded gear, you’re buying tradition. You’re buying exceptional expertise and a better product. It’s gear that’s built to help you get more outdoors for your money. Gear so well made, it’s backed up with our legendary lifetime guarantee. Look for the green badge. It represents the best value and quality anywhere. Cabelas – for a lifetime.

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    • #60566
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Good job Mary, nice pacing and tone. You definitely are hitting the right words in this one in my opinion. Keep it up. Happy New Year too!!

      • #60602
        mkell755
        Participant

        Thanks for the feedback Robert! Trying to hit the right words and also sound natural. Thanks!

        Mary

    • #60565
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Good job, Mary! Your “for’s” were enunciated clearly on my end. I heard a minor “tah” in It’s gear that’s built to help you get more outdoors for your money. But, I completely understand the struggle…

      Kathy

      • #60603
        mkell755
        Participant

        Thanks for the feedback Kathy! Yes I hear the “tah” you are talking about – gah. Even after focusing on it, still manages to creep in. Thanks again!

        Mary

  • #60552
    katelyndawnvo
    Participant

    Hi folks, just uploading a litte narration piece for you tonight AND… maybe we can all learn something about betty crocker while eating some cookie dough or cake batter… Any feedback is appreciated.

    Betty Crocker is an imaginary person. Nonetheless, in a 1945 survey she was named the second-best-known woman in America, after Eleanor Roosevelt.
    She was “born” in 1921 during a Gold Medal flour promotion^ in which users completed a puzzle^ to win a pin cushion.

    Company executives decided to use the signature of “Betty Crocker” on the prize letters. Betty because the name had a warm approachable feel, and Crocker after an early company director, William G, Crocker.

    The fictional Ms. Crocker became so popular that she soon had her own products and recipe books, many of which still exist today.

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    • #60877
      katelyndawnvo
      Participant

      Thank you all for the feedback! 🙂

    • #60666
      monibr16
      Participant

      Hey Katelyn! You’re a great story teller. I could tell you knew exatctly what you were talking about and led the listener well. I did hear a pause that didn’t flow “she was born” you almost sounded like you lost your place. But besides that very nice job!

    • #60567
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Nice read Katelyn, very easy to listen to! Good pacing, tone with a story telling charm. Good job!

    • #60559
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Katelyn, good read! I like the pacing and warm conversational tone throughout. I can’t think of much to critique on this one, very good!

      Mary

    • #60555
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Hi Katelyn!

      Nice warm tone, and change in pitch variation. Pacing was good too. I did catch a couple of spots where you paused for effect not in the script, but overall this was a good read!

      Kathy

  • #60527
    kfvoice
    Participant

    Hello voice fellows!

    I’ve got another commercial read I put together for you. Felt like trying something different again, besides narration, for practice.

    I am prepared to be critiqued on the clarity and enunciation. (I said ‘hundred as opposed to one hundred — not that I was trying to imitate a Mainer, it just happened, and I decided to leave it in.)

    Let me know what you think! Thanks again!

    Kathy

    Poland Spring Brand Natural Spring Water

    A lot has changed since we got our start back in 1845, but we’re still sourced from our carefully selected springs.

    Celebrating 175 years. Poland Spring Brand Natural Spring Water. From the Heart of Maine.

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    • #60568
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Kathy, I agree with Mary and Katelyn. Your pretty mono tone in that read. Good pacing though. Happy New Year!

    • #60550
      katelyndawnvo
      Participant

      Hi Kathy! thanks for posting! I would like to hear a read of this where you vary your pitch a little more. If this was a song it is kind of all one-note so you could try varying your pitch to emphasize the important words. 🙂

      • #60554
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Hi Katelyn!

        Thanks for the feedback! That will be my first upload in the New Year! 🙂

        Kathy

    • #60540
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Kathy! Good read! I think the pacing and clarity were good, but the tone on “…from our carefully selected springs” sounded a little flat to me, maybe “carefully” could have been emphasized a little more to vary the pitch a little? I was thinking about what has not changed since 1845 for this company and it’s possibly the fact that they CAREFULLY select the springs, vs. use just any water, so that makes it more important to emphasize in my mind.

      I did not mind the “a hundred” vs. “one hundred” on this one; it sounded appropriate for the script. Overall very good!

      Mary

      • #60547
        kfvoice
        Participant

        Thanks, Mary!

        Your points make sense. I’ll work on varying my tone in that sentence, as well as emphasizing “carefully”.

        Thanks again!

        Kathy

  • #60514
    mkell755
    Participant

    Hello all! Here is a recording (recorded on my phone) for any and all feedback. We love Chewy.com! Let me know what you think. Thanks!

    Mary

    Chewy
    At Chewy we know the only thing that changes when bringing home a new pet…is everything! And we’re here with everything to help you on that journey. We’ve got toys, treats and food, even prescriptions, delivered right to your door. Get great prices and fast free shipping at Chewy!

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    • #60569
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      Hey Mary, good read. But I have a suggestion for what my opinion is worth. When you say everything the first time up pitch every and low pitch thing. Then on the next everything do the opposite. Hope this may help. 😊

      • #60604
        mkell755
        Participant

        Hi Robert, thanks for the feedback! Thanks for the suggestion, that totally makes sense in making the variation of products being sold stand out a little more. Appreciate it!

        Mary

    • #60526
      kfvoice
      Participant

      Hi Mary!

      Nice read! The pacing was good, but I wasn’t hearing the “smile” in your voice with the read. I believe this would show the enthusiasm and love you have for Chewy. I hope this is helpful.

      Kathy

      • #60536
        mkell755
        Participant

        Hi Kathy, thanks for the feedback! I will work on smiling more for this one, thanks again!

        Mary

  • #60502
    sabpierotti
    Participant

    Hi, friends! Here is an audition I submitted for a regional TV commercial. Pasted below is the script along with a link to the music accompanying the commercial. Please provide feedback on not only tone but also technique! I am still learning so I personally think it sounds good but to a more trained ear, you might hear something in my voice that I don’t. Thanks in advance for the feedback!

    Music: https://www.premiumbeat.com/royalty-free-tracks/the-light-ahead

    Script: The places we call “work” and “home” are starting to look more and more alike. When you could live and work anywhere, why not make it somewhere extraordinary, where the air is fresher, your paycheck goes further, and at up to 10 gigabits per second, the internet is some of the fastest in the country. Whether you need to be connected or get reconnected, Bristol is ready.

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    • #60551
      katelyndawnvo
      Participant

      Hi! I enjoy your commercial reads 🙂 You’ve got a great tone and you fit this copy nicely. My constructive bits would be that you can lift “work” and “home” out of the script a little more as these are important to differentiate between. When there is something with an air quote, it helps to actually physically do the air quotes while you read because it naturally helps you lift them up a little more. There were a couple of unnecessary pauses like between “why not make it somewhere (pause) extraordinary,” Just some things that stood out to me. Nice work!

      Katelyn

    • #60525
      kfvoice
      Participant

      I really liked your delivery for the read. The tone and pacing were good, as well.

      I agree with Mary about emphasizing the words “work” and “home” a little more. Overall, good job!

      Kathy

    • #60516
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Sabpierotti – very nice! I really like your nice warm tone and pacing for this script. Great enunciation and sounded very good. The only thing I can think of to critique is that “work” and “home” could possibly be emphasized a little more, to let the listener catch up as to one of the main reasons why they need the superfast internet connection. Minor point, just my interpretation. Very good!

      Mary

      • #60530
        sabpierotti
        Participant

        Thanks for this great feedback, Mary! I agree, “work” and “home” could be emphasized a bit more. Thank you! Happy New Year!

        • #60539
          mkell755
          Participant

          You are welcome and Happy New Year! 🙂

    • #60507
      SuperLuke
      Participant

      Great recording quality and great audition.

  • #60495
    Bil-Bo
    Participant

    Grip-Top Sock

    Give me the gift of a grip-top sock,
    A clip drape shipshape tip top sock.
    _______________________________________
    Not your spinslick slapstick slipshod stock,
    But a plastic, elastic grip-top sock.
    _______________________________________
    None of your fantastic slack swap slop
    From a slap dash flash cash haberdash shop.
    _________________________________________
    Not a knick knack knitlock knockneed knickerbocker sock
    With a mock-shot blob-mottled trick-ticker top clock.
    __________________________________________
    Not a supersheet seersucker ruck sack sock,
    Not a spot-speckled frog-freckled cheap sheik’s sock
    ___________________________________________
    Off a hodge-podge moss-blotched scotch-botched block.
    Nothing slipshod drip drop flip flop or glip glop
    ____________________________________________
    Tip me to a tip top grip top sock.
    – Dr. Seuss

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    • #60614
      Robert Broussard
      Participant

      BilBo, that was very good!

    • #60519
      kfvoice
      Participant

      *clap, clap, clap, clap, clap, clap*

      BRAVO! Nice production! Fantastic job on varying your tone in each section!

      Kathy

    • #60518
      mkell755
      Participant

      Hi Bil-Bo – loved it! All the different voices and accents sounded great. I was chuckling as I listened to it! The production sounded great as well. Very good work on this crazy tongue twister! 🙂

      Mary

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