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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Trying my hand at a fast–yet still clear–delivery (oh, those plosives!)
TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES ELECTRONIC MASKS
Slice and Dice! With the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles electronic masks, you’ll always be ready to “turtle up”! Take that, Shredder! Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles each sold separately by Playmates.
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OK, so for plosives, that’s just mic technique and taking the air out from behind those letters. As far as the speed…it definitely got muddy with the enunciation. The trick is to say everything fast without losing the words. One of my coaches told me to slow down to speed up, and while it seems paradoxical, it actually works.
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Hi, Brian. Thank you for your insights! I shifted my mic and, as you suggested, tried to tap the breaks without losing the energy (I also noted I could’ve interpreted the script more accurately as the second line is one thought, whereas I broke it up in my original read). Again, my thanks for taking the time to listen and comment!
TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES ELECTRONIC MASKS – TAKE 2
Slice and Dice! With the new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles electronic masks, you’ll always be ready to “turtle up”! Take that, Shredder! Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles each sold separately by Playmates.
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And one more for the road as I’m now learning I should have saved in MP3 Format. Apologies and thanks.
-M
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(If this double posted, I apologize…it doesn’t look like my first attempt was successful.)
Doing some narration practice, working on pacing and diction (making sure my “ands” and “tos” are pronounced without being over-enunciated), and as always, on tone. I put the VO over some video of me rolling with a white belt pre-COVID, in case you would like to see a little Brazilian jiu jitsu as well, hence the YouTube Link: https://youtu.be/G575XrpcgDw
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Hi there, I tried posting this last night but it didn’t work, sorry if this is a duplicate! This is a longer read than I normally post. I was trying to not overthink it and was working a bit on my cold reading skills. Please let me know if I sound conversational and spontaneous and if I’m missing the mark please let me know how. I appreciate your constructive criticism!
BabyBallot:
Welcome to BabyBallot, the fun and interactive new way to find the best name for your baby. BabyBallot replaces those boring baby name books and stuffy research websites with a simple, and social way to find the best name.. and win prizes in the process!
In under 2 min you can choose your favorite baby names and invite friends and family to vote via Facebook and Twitter. Whether you’re into Hawaiian names, traditional names, or what’s popular right now, we’ve got you covered with the best collection of names anywhere.
Here’s how it works.
Create your BabyBallot and select your favorite names. Then, invite friends and family to vote via email, twitter, or directly from facebook. Loved ones from all over the globe can now be involved in this fun, and important, decision. When friends arrive to your BabyBallot, they can send you comments, suggest additional names, and finally cast their votes!
And by casting their votes, they can win you great baby prizes like strollers, cribs and other baby products. The BabyBallot with the most votes each week wins!-
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I think it’s a good read, but I’m not sure if I’m getting conversational and spontaneous from it. It doesn’t sound like you’re talking to a specific person, more that you’re speaking to an audience. I think that the list that begins “whether you’re into…” has a lot of potential to really sound conversational.
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Hi everyone! Here is a script for any and all feedback. Let me know what you think! Thanks for taking the time to listen.
Mary
Cabi clothing
Can clothes really change your life? We believe they can.
How many mornings do you find yourself taking way too long to answer this simple question: “What do I wear today?” Cue the hanger flinging, the self-doubt, the belief that none of this even looks good on me. We’ve been there, and it’s time for a change. Because when we feel great, we step into the world more fully our unique selves. And that’s life-changing.-
Mary good effort. It does sound more like your reading. Try to make more conversational talking to a friend.
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Hi Mary…couple of notes from the first listen:
– it feels “read” as opposed to feeling natural. How are you connecting this to the listener? Who do you envision that you are speaking to? This will help with getting out of the “read” zone and into the conversational zone that most clients are looking for right now
– the “b” in “believe” is really lost…not sure if that’s just from the recording, or the enunciation
– The penultimate sentence is really rushed, especially in comparison with the rest of the read (I do this sometimes as well)
– There’s a glottal stop after “that’s” in the tag…try to keep the phrase moving without that pause there -
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First crack at a public service announcement. Was the tone right?
Script –
For the 27 million Americans who can’t read, competing in today’s marketplace is nearly impossible. You can help fight illiteracy by reading to a child. And by giving a child a book. Brought to you by The Coors Foundation for Family Literacy.-
Hello, Sarah! Beautiful read—-very crisp, clear, and inviting to the ear. Also, a unique choice on your tone as one might expect a rather dire expression, but your read is very hopeful without losing any of the gravitas of the message. My one (minor) note would be to perhaps pause a bit longer before you hit the “Brought to you by…” section as I feel it’s more of a coda and not part of the main message. Well done!
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Hello good people! I am posting a few more narration takes with different tones. As always, I appreciate any feedback you all have.
All the best,
John
Official Alaska Vacation Planning Video
This Official Alaska Vacation Planning Video is filled with plenty of breathtaking scenes. But more important, it’s loaded with all the information you need for planning a trip to Alaska. Like when to go, what to wear, and what to see. So if you’ve got Alaska on your mind, you’re going to love this video. Let’s begin with snow sports. This is definitely the place. For cross-country and down-hill skiing. For snow boarding, tobogganing, and even ice fishing.Training Video
At the back of the machine, a basket is catching the finished product as its ejected. That final product will pass through visual, leak and resistance quality control inspections. The final product is loaded onto pallets and delivered to the Assembly Department for attachment to the battery can.Nero – Intro
He was a perverse cross-dressing exhibitionist who had an incestuous relationship with his mother and married his step sister. He murdered members of his own family in fits of jealous rage. His cruelty, violence, and grotesque appetite for self-indulgence brought the Roman empire to the brink of financial and political ruin. And he viscously persecuted the christians. They would remember him as the ultimate embodiment of evil … the anti-christ.-
1) I could definitely here the smile in the first one, which is good. Maybe connect with the material a little more to ground it some?
2) Same note as above, not sure I heard much of a difference between the first two in terms of tone, and I’m not sure I got who you were speaking to. Adding that will really take these to the next level. -
Hi John! Really nice reads!! I listened to the training one and the nero one.
Training video feedback – you have a really nice smooth delivery with no awkward pauses, and your treatment of vowels coming off of consonants is really great – no glottal stops! I learned from this read. I’m trying to be extremely conscious of glottal stops.
The Nero one – It sounded like it would work well in a documentary form. Listening to it without visuals I felt the pace was a little slow and carefully paced, but that is probably because I’m listening to it and on screen there would obviously be visuals and your pace allows time for information to sink in so take that for whatever it is worth. There was the word ‘appetite’ that lost the T on the end.Really great work John!
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Trying to get myself out of the box but now of course just feel like I’m screaming at the microphone. Help! This is alarmingly close to how I converse with my friends, but probably not what my coach wants when she says to be conversational. Any and all critique is welcome. THANKS!
At Freshii you can customize your entree and be your own culinary master. So what’s in your custom bowl? Tex Mex with black beans and a little salsa fresca? Teriyaki twist with a pop of pineapple? Whatever your fresh idea, get any 2 bowls for just $12.99! Freshii – Eat. Energize!
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Hello, burdahgirl. You had me at “Salsa Frrrrrresca”. No sense of screaming whatsoever, just a light, buoyant read that is as enticing as the fare you’re describing. Definitely flows naturally without any tell-tale “I’m reading off a script” woodenness. Great work!
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Howdy! You’re off to a great start with the first sentence, it’s very inviting and the inflection is good. It goes a little flat when you get to “Tex Mex”, I would jazz it up so it matches with the fun you added to “Salsa Fresca”. I understand where you’re coming from trying to sound conversational while selling something. Great job!
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