Feedback Forum
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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Hey there! Imma try this a second time! First time I’ve posted a demo here; looking forward to any critique. You won’t hurt my feelings.
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Hi Mitch, Welcome and congratulations on your first demo post! I like the quality of your read very much, has a nice conversational ease to it that lends itself well to the client. On a technical note, you might dial your music levels back a bit as I feel your read is fighting to be heard over it (I second Lexi’s comment that you sound a bit removed from the mic). All in all, easy fixes! Keep up the great work!
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Hi Mitch, welcome!
Good job! I liked the energy, clarity and pacing. “Turn the trip you have to take…” sounded like “Turn the trip ya have to take..”; not sure if the “ya” was intentional, but just a small note to consider. Otherwise very good! Your voice sounds good for this genre. Keep it up!
Mary
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Unintentional! I didn’t even notice it; thanks for pointing it out. I wonder if it would sound more choppy with “you”. I’ll give it a try. Thanks Mary!
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I completely understand. It sounds more natural to say “the trip ya have to take” vs/ “you have to take”, definitely. I get the criticism that I say “ta” instead of “to” and “fer” instead of “for”, and it’s difficult to say in some scripts! Someone here posted a while back that they substitute 2 for to, and 4 for for in the scripts as they read them as a reminder, and I have started doing that too; really draws your focus to those tiny pesky connector words as you are performing the script! 🙂
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Mitch this was awesome! The read and music were on point. Your vocal audio sounds like you are in a small empty space, maybe a little far away. Not sure if that could be edited out or not. Other than that this was amazing!
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Thanks Lexi–you are WAY too kind! I probably need to be closer to my microphone. I have a decent one with a pop filter, but no real “studio” per se. Baby steps! 🙂
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Hello All! It’s Lexi and I am currently en route to recrding my Commercial Demo which I am super excited about!! Whoo hoo! So please let me know how I sound here in this PSA from our script library. Audio Chain used PCV Booth w/ moving blankets, NT-1 A w/ pop filter, PC, DAW Audacity, Scarlett 2i2 Interface. I also did some very minor edits on the original audio (Noise profile>Noise reduction>normalize) Audacity default settings are what i used to reduce the noise and normalize this audio.
Scripting
Whether you’re young or old, male or female, single or with a family – this video is for and about you. That’s because Social Security has programs that affect everybody. This presentation was prepared by the Social Security Administration and tells you what you need to know about Social Security while still working and what you need to know when it’s your turn to collect benefits. It also provides an overview of Medicare and Supplemental Security Income benefits.
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Hi Lexi, great job! I really like your deep, clear and richly-textured voice. It sounds warm and reassuring and this is a great genre for you. I’m not fully set up in my studio, but I heard a breath taken at the very beginning and again before “This presentation…”, perhaps those could be edited out. I agree with Kevin about your pronunciation of Social in that it could be a little crisper / clearer each time it is said. Otherwise really good job!
Mary
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Hello Lexi! I am a beginner, so please take my feedback with a grain of salt. =)
I really like the warmth to your voice. My favorite part was, “this video is for and about you.” It really drew me in the way you emphasized “you.”
I was a little bothered by your pronunciation of “Social”. It sounds like “Soh-sul” instead of “Soh-sh-ul”, with an “sh” sound.
Otherwise, nice job!-
Hello Kevin! And welcome fellow beginner! I too am in my beginnings, but THANK YOU for your feedback! I greatly appreciate every response that I get from an newbie or a more advanced artist. I believe the ‘sh’ is the sibilant as IRVJ informed me of. And I think that can be edited out. I will keep working with everyone’s help here! Thank you!
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Good job! I like the read, pace and tone were on point. You might have to play with the Audacity settings a bit, sounded as if you were speaking into a can and there was also a bit of sibilance, (which I struggle with). You also might want to remove some breaths either manually or via a noise gate. The read was good, just need to tweak your settings. Keep it up!
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Hi Lexi! I particularly like your voice at the end of the first three sentences when its pitch goes lower. Tempo seems on point. Nice read!
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Hello all! Here is a recording for any and all feedback. Working on lead-ins and attempting to sound casual and conversational. Let me know what you think. Thanks!
Mary
Balance Bar
Running for a train…or training for a run…
Find your Balance. Every delicious Balance Bar gives you the perfect 40-30-30 ratio of carbs, protein, and dietary fat……for energy that lasts. Balance Bar. Have you found your Balance?-
Hello Mary I love this read you did a wonderful job sounding casual and conversational! I would have liked the tmpo to be a hair faster just to make it sound even more conversational.
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To get in touch with my old man character in my demo, I decided to read some poetry as the character. I also would like some feedback on my performance and recording quality (i.e. loud enough, can you hear me perform, how’s my performance).
Script: There once was a man from Peru, who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night to find that his dream has come true, (Laugh) Oh I enjoy poetry
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Hi SuperLuke! Nice! I like your character voice, and it works really well for this poem. I like the tone variation throughout. I’m not fully set up yet to give much feedback on recording quality. “He woke with a fright…” sounded like “He woke wid a fright…” to me, so working on clearer enunciation is my feedback (from what I’m hearing). Keep it up!
Mary
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Hi Everyone,
I am new to voice over, and currently taking the private coaching. I want to post my practice recording and see what feedback I need to improve.
Script: California State Park (Edge Studio Librar)
Welcome to the California State Park’s Directory of Natural Resources. California’s parks are here for the entire family to enjoy. They’re your parks, and we urge you to abide by basic conservation guidelines. On days designated as “dry days,” please do not light matches or start fires of any kind in any of our parks. The threat of forest fires is of constant concern to California Foresters. Campfires are permitted, but in designated Campfire Zones only. All state parks are open at 7 a.m. and close at sundown. Please adhere to this rule for your own safety and protection. We would like you to come back often and take advantage of California’s great outdoors. After all, you make it work.-
Hello this was a very nice read your accent really makes the read very genuine and interesting. I am also new here and I found that when I mark up my script (which is when you create a legend of marks that you use to mark your script the way you want to read it.) you can read more about this process in The Voice Actor’s Performance Guidebook page 73 after the word IMPORTANT in bold letters. I have been doing this and it definately helps. You know your voice so marking where you need breaths at among other things also will help you to know exactly where to make those same edits if necessary later on.
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Hi Dmendoza, welcome!
I like the tone and pacing of this script for you. It sounded more like it was something you were reading than telling someone about (something I’m working on myself). In the second sentence it sounded more like a question “…for the entire family to enjoy?” vs. “…for the entire family to enjoy.” I agree too that there should be more emphasis on “you make it work” as a final statement for telling someone why they should go to California State Parks. Good job!Mary
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Hi there! Here is an audition I submitted! It is supposed to be for a promotional tourism video. My first try was more upbeat and family-oriented (they said to picture white sandy beaches, couples holding hands and families) and the second is more subdued for a luxurious video. I wasn’t sure which they were going for. Thanks for any feedback! 🙂
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Hi Katelyn! The first read sounded more natural, more you. As others have posted, a really crisp, clean voice. For the more luxurious read, maybe go down a tad in pitch so that it has a more sultry, refined feel to it. Just a thought.
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Hi Katelyn very nice recording quality sounded very clear and crisp. You did an awesome job on both reads. If you wanted to give it a completely different feel you could play with the pitch and inflection places which can naturally make you sound more upbeat or vice versa more luxurious and airy. I am totally new here, but I always change my pitch and inflection points up a bit when recording a different take so that the differences are more defined. Hope this helps! Excellent Job!
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Hi Katelyn. To me, the second read feels truer to what you intended (subdued, luxurious), so I liked that one better. To really distinguish between the 2 reads, i may have gone with even more energy/upbeat for the first read. Great work though! Toque
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Hi Katelyn! I actually liked the first one more. Your voice makes me want to go to whatever beach the spot shows me visually! I could see a little more energy there, too. Regardless, it was a really good read. Hope you get it! 🙂
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I think that both reads are good for this advertisement. Good recording quality as well. I think you can try and merge the two reads together. Find a balance between the two performances that will really make us, as listeners, want to go on a vacation by the beach and a vacation.
As a matter of picking between the first and second performance, I thought the second read was more heartfelt and luring the audience into the commercial and making us want to be there. Hope this critique is helpful
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This is a read I am considering for my demo. I did several takes and exhausted them because I can’t seem to get the beginning quite right, but maybe that is just me! Would love your feedback.
When you love your skin naturally, it shows. Boost your skin’s moisture for a glow the world can see. Introducing new, Burt’s Bees Truly Glowing Skin Care.
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Hi Amber, really nice read! You have such a nice, warm tone and it sounds really good for this genre. It feels very authentic for Burt’s Bees. Good job!
Mary
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It’s you – lol. I liked it overall and I especially liked how you started out. I’d guess that little uplift in tempo and pitch of “it shows” is what will set you apart, especially since it comes at the beginning. I could also feel you smiling when hitting that phrase which made the message more natural and conversational, and not just reading a script. The “for a glow” phrase didn’t flow for me – too much emphasis on pronouncing the “a”.( I’m wondering if you edited this part of the file – I sometimes hear similar effects on my stuff that I try to edit but I am still at bottom of learning curve with my DAW.) I also thought the pause at the comma after “new” was too long, making the last sentence a little choppy. Two very minor tweaks and overall, a very demo worthy read.
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Hi Amber. Sometimes I find it difficult to assess someone’s read without knowing what sort of “direction” was intended. I know a lot of the scripts in the Edge library don’t come with directions, which leaves it up to us to self-direct. What sort of read/sound were you shooting for? A lot of aspects of your read are good (ex. audio quality, pace, enunciation). As it is now, it comes across as a rather low-energy read. Is that what was intended? Toque
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Hello fellow voices! I’m really appreciating this forum and the positive, constructive feedback. Thank you all for participating! Here’s another one of my reads. I’m hoping to be really fun and engaging in narration for younger audiences. Any tips?
Script:
Why is food important? Well, it tastes good, and it’s fun to eat, but it also gives us energy! That means it helps our bodies move and work, so we can grow, play, dance, run, study, and think.Our bodies work kind of like a car. If you don’t put good fuel into the car, it won’t be able to drive. But, when you put the right fuel in, VROOM! Off it goes!
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Hi KBridges! Good work! I’m agreeing with others on the volume being low, and speeding it up just a little would be good too to keep kid’s attention. For the list of items “…so we can grow, play, dance, run, study, and think.” the tone started high and just kept getting higher, so maybe more variation but up and down in tone in that list? Hopefully that makes sense. I like it, keep it up!
Mary
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Hi Kbridges!
Thanks for sharing your read! I really like your energy during the read! I can tell you are smiling and really want to help people understand why the right food is important. A couple of things I noticed. You have essentially the same tone throughout your read. I’d look for a little tone variety as you are reading through it. I’d also working on speeding it up a little bit. I think the pace is just a little bit slow and could use a bit of a boost. Finally, as you are reading your list “play, dance, run…” try hitting a bit more variety in the list so it doesn’t sound like you are reading the list. (I got the same feedback yesterday too!).Hope this helps a bit!
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Hi adding another/different take on the Kingston piece below, as I didn’t like the first one after I listened to it over. Didn’t feel conversational enough, I thought. Toque
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Toque – I thought the second version was a spot-on, well-done conversational read. The change in tempo, a slightly increased pitch and nice enunciation combined to deliver what I heard what you described you were going for, one friend selling the features of a place they are connected with to another. And, you did an excellent job with the breathing, tempo and volume required to get through that big-a** first phrase of the second sentence. – Chas
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Hi Toque!
I listened to both takes of this read, and it’s cool to be able to hear the difference. The second read does have a more conversational, engaging, and positive energy. I imagine the narrator of the video walking along the waterfront, talking to the audience and showing them a beautiful place.
There was a little catch at the beginning of “proud to share” that interrupted the flow, but overall it flows really well and is well received by this listener.
What did you change between the two takes? Any tips on getting that more conversational tone?
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Hi kbridges. Thanks for the feedback! In the first take, I think I was in more of an announcer/narrator headspace, thinking of it more as a formal presentation I was doing. For the second take, I tried to imagine I was just talking to a specific friend of mine who was thinking of moving to Kingston. I think that helped make it more natural and less formal. That little catch you pointed out before “proud to share” was intentional, because we don’t always speak like we’re reading copy when we speak to our friends. Hope this helps! Toque
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