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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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If Dr. Seuss Were a Technical Writer…..
Here’s an easy game to play.
Here’s an easy thing to say:
If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port,
And the bus is interrupted as a very last resort,
And the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
Then the socket packet pocket has an error to report!
If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
And the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash,
And your data is corrupted ’cause the index doesn’t hash,
then your situation’s hopeless, and your system’s gonna crash!
You can’t say this? What a shame, sir!
We’ll find you another game, sir.
If the label on the cable on the table at your house,
Says the network is connected to the button on your mouse,
But your packets want to tunnel on another protocol,
That’s repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall,
And your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss,
So your icons in the window are as wavy as a s***e,
Then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang,
‘Cause as sure as I’m a poet, the sucker’s gonna hang!
When the copy of your floppy’s getting sloppy on the disk,
And the microcode instructions cause unnecessary risk,
Then you have to flash your memory and you’ll want to ram your rom.
Quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your mom!2021 Chevy Silverado Trail Boss
The Chevy Silverado Trail Boss
When you have a two inch lift…
When you have Goodyear Duratrack tires…
When you have Rancho shocks…and an integrated dual exhaust…
When you have all that…
The last thing you’ll need…is a road…
The Chevy Silverado Trail Boss…
Ready to off-road…right from the factory.
Chevy….find new roads…-
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Tongue twister to truck commercial now that’s a good range Nice work Bill! Hey have you tried Ray the Firefly sounds like it might be up your alley I recorded it sometime back but not sure if I want to post it.
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Hello All! I’m looking for feedback on my recorded audio. Sound Quality and Performance mainly but anything helps=) thank you in advance!
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This is day two of my self prescribed exercise – read the same script imagining talking to three distinctly different people. Recorded on my phone, so apologies for the less than ideal quality. I’m really trying to just focus on this one aspect for a few rounds to try to understand it better and perform it better.
Thanks for any insight!
“If you‘re in the dark about where to ski, let us shed some light on the subject. High in Virginia‘
s Blue Ridge Mountains, discover what‘s been called the Mid-Atlantic‘s finest overall
ski experience. Wintergreen offers 10 slopes, five lifts, and an extensive snow-making
system. Not to mention luxurious accommodations, an indoor spa, and a nationally recognized
children‘s program. For more information, call 1-800-ski-green. That‘s 1-800-skigreen.
Wintergreen and Virginia … the perfect combination!”-
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Nice Job! #2 is your most engaging read. I don’t know who you were picturing, but it worked!
If you wanted to further work on the piece I’d dissect it a bit looking for the transition points in the script.
The first line stands alone. Nicely done.
Then, beginning at the second, you get into the big enticing reason to go there, so I’d milk it a bit. It *is* the finest!
You did a good job describing the amenities and I like how you ended it! -
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Hi,
Interesting practice exercise. I tried listening to just the first line in each recording to see if I could guess the imagined listener and here’s what I came up with: 1) romantic partner 2) casual friend or young person 3) older adult. So, not sure it matters that I guessed right but good that I hear clear differences. I really enjoyed moments from each take and think that smile in your voice is especially engaging. Thanks for sharing. Bill A.
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Hi everyone! I’m also warming up for the demo, and greatly appreciate the feedback on these short commercial scripts. Thank you!
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Hi Tori
I like your voice and I suggest that a little more energy throughout, choosing some key words for a little more emphasis and sharpening some selected pronunciations would help both scripts. I’ll limit this just to Aruba.Aruba – the first two words sounded a little slurred. I didn’t hear the “t” in “It” and the second syllable in “tropical” was almost inaudible. The list in 0:06 – 0.12 contain a few words that would paint a more attractive picture if they were emphasized, e.g., everything, romantic, exciting adventures, whole family. I also think “you have found it“ needs to stand out more because I think this is the heart of the message and the answer to the big question “If you are looking for ……”. Lastly, at the end, I heard “you will love whaa Aruba offers”; the hard consonant “t” went missing.
Just some minor, easy to fix tweaks. Keep up the good work.
Chas -
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More Homework! This is written to be a :60, so there will be lots of visuals to fill in. I do see these “pharma” auditions from time to time, so feedback would be wonderful.
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I agree with burdakgirl — great performance. If I were producing this, I would ask for a couple small changes (e.g. less inflection on “that are exaggerated) but you do such a nice job with pacing and phrasing overall. You sound like a trusted friend. Also, I might add a high-pass filter to your recording as the low end is a bit rumbly, in my opinion. Thanks for sharing! Bill A.
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Another piece for class, where I’m looking for your review. It’s a :60 for Levis. Just another one I really like. Thanks in advance!
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Sure hope I’m doing this right!
This is a really fun spot! Not planning to use it anywhere specific. Just havin’ fun with my homework. looking forward to feedback!
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Hi Barb, really nice work! You sounded very conversational and genuinely excited about the Camry. I could really hear the smile in your voice and it sounded like you were having fun! Really good pacing and variation in key words. Good job!
Mary
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Have you booked any meditation work? Do you listen to meditations? Are you needing some encouragement? I’d love your feedback on my performance… Thank you! Bill A.
Script: I know that you’re scared, and it’s a good thing to be scared. Because with that fear, you realise that there is a strange adrenaline rush that takes over you, akin to most of the top athletes and singers right before they play and start their performance. As you feel scared, you can begin to you know…use this emotion for the better. Use the rush, use the adrenaline, use all of this nervous energy. You get scared because your mind pictures things not going in your favour, however the mind is creative. One of the scenarios it can create, can come from the space of courage. It’s all a picture in your head at the end of the day. So why don’t you take this opportunity to think of the outcome that you want, the one in which you’ll feel happy, satisfied and excited about this journey that you’re about to take. Yes, use all the nervous energy to imagine a level of euphoria unfathomable so far in your life. It’s bright and vivid. You put aside the negative images you were seeing with these new, beautiful and breathtaking ones. Yes, you can……NOW….BEGIN TO BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.
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Showoff! A+ work on this Bill! Meditation work? I’d take work reading a canned soup label. Have you tried or listened to ASMR? I have a demo of motivational work, this could be considered motivational as well as meditation, performance was awesome, I would get rid of the word unfathomable it can’t be said conversationally without much difficulty,hope that helps.
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Hello all!
Have you ever gotten the same note from coach again, and again….and again? Welp, I am trying an exercise to help with my “same note every time” issue. This is the same read, three times, with each read being directed to a different person. These are just on my phone, so sorry for the lower quality. I’m just trying to find the more authentic tone my coach is looking for and have been S T R U G G L I N G with hearing it and/or performing it.Thanks for any feedback you have!
PS – sorry, I have FAILED at this post, posing mp4s and then forgetting that i had a lead in on one and I can’t figure out how to delete it and start over. Sorry for the sloppy upload, thanks for your grace!
“So much beauty in one place! America is a great country, and we’ve got the best way to see it. Amtrak “Explore America” fares. Round trips from one hundred and seventy nine dollars all across America. It’s a great country at a great price. Call 1-800-USA-RAIL now about Amtrak “Explore America” fares.”
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Burdahgirl
I also like #3. It felt the most conversational and authentic. I’m sure the lead-in helped frame the style you were after big time. It did seem that you had the emphasis reversed for “great price” at end of next to last sentence and I would have also emphasized “great” a little more in the two uses of “great country”. However, you have a fundamentally very good read throughout and it seems the “read it 3 times” suggestion worked well for you. Keep up the good work!
Chas
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Hi Burdahgirl, on the whole, nice job!
Lead in lines are great!I like #3, but I would bring in even more excitement about your trip. And I’d think you could get away with “uh-hundred and Seventy-nine” for the trip cost. Makes it more conversational.
There’s something I do, that I hear in you…a precision or carefulness with the script. It’s hard to be brave enough not to be perfect! Try taking it line by line, and MEMORIZE the line, don’t read it. It may help!
You got this!
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Hi Burdahgirl! First of all, I hear you about getting the same note repeatedly from my coach (and others for that matter) – I feel your pain!!!!*?*! I do believe in this case that practice really can make perfect.
So my preference in these 3 reads is the last one. Lead-ins are helping me get to the appropriate tone and it seems like they are for you as well. I still think its great to use them and then just chop them off as needed for later 🙂 All 3 reads were nice, but the third one had a little more variation in tone and sounded very authentic in encouraging someone to take a trip on Amtrak. Really good job here!
Mary
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Here is another sample of me after reading after the Self- Direction and Cold Reading class, any feedback will be very much appreciated. Thanks.
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So good! Yeah, “canary” should have the accent on the second syllable, but I do love imagining the animated character that might go along with this, making your accent even more effective. Is he a romantic figure, a swashbuckling hero? Maybe imagining it would play up the challenges between the cat and canary more. Just love it!
Only thing, maybe leave a 1/2 second pause at the front of an audition. I don’t know if it’s the Edge player, but the beginning was clipped for me, and often find when listening online (be it here or Voices) if you don’t the first words get clipped.
Barb
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Oh my, I love this read with your beautiful accent because it makes that cat food made with real chicken sound like the most delectable treat! Great read – super energy and pace. Just double check the syllabic stress on “canary”, but that’s an easy fix!
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