Feedback Forum
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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Hey Here is another reel for my homework. I’ve updated my sound and mic. Looking for healthy criticism. This is script from an audition I’ve recently done.
As you learn the world… I’m so proud to call you mine You’re captivated when we read, And your happy belly protects you all day long!
You’re eager to talk, And excited to walk! That’s why I choose Enspire for you… With nutrients to support your growth, and fuel your big ambitions!”I’ve also redone the Johnson’s Baby Shampoo.
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Hello! The volume level needs to be much higher. I think there might be a blog on the Edge site about what the acceptable range should be for your recordings. I think the main thing to consider focusing on is the conversational aspect about both scripts, and if you can picture who you’re talking to, so in this case your baby, and deliver the lines as if you’re really talking to him, then that might help make it sound more connected. Also consider how you’re feeling in that moment, maybe cherishing the private time you are having with your baby boy, and let that feeling show through in your words. Both scripts have great potential for you, so keep at it!
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Hello, any feedback is appreciated – Thank you.
” Welcome to the planet earth. A place of blue nitrogen skies, oceans of liquid water, cool forests, soft meadows; A world positively rippling with life. From the cosmic perspective, it is, for the moment, unique. The only world on which we know with certainty that the matter of the cosmos has become alive, and aware. There must be many such worlds scattered through space, but our search for them begins here, with the accumulated wisdom of the men and women of our species, acquired at great cost, over a million years. ”
Also, does anyone have any tips for getting back to their posts asides from clicking through pages and pages of posts looking for theirs? I feel like I miss the old forum style quite a bit.
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Hi all. Demo day is later this month. This isn’t one of the scripts I’ll be using, but I’m just trying to put in some general practice. Would appreciate feedback on any/all aspects. Thanks! Toque
Script:
Hey…if life were perfect, magazines would never smell like perfume, dogs would walk themselves, and algebra would really come in handy. Well, look on the bright side, at least there’s AMSTEL LIGHT. It has only 95 calories, but you still get real imported taste. You don’t give up a thing. Who says nothing’s perfect?…Amstel light.
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Hello!
Looking for some feedback on both tone and pace for this one specifically! If you hear anything in the background my heat is running and my fingers were too cold to sacrifice it for the recording!“Do you know me? Probably not. In my business, recognition is always important, but when I’m buying goods online, I prefer a little privacy. With Private Payments from American Express, I get the security of a unique number created for each business transaction I make. Because my private information is my business, and American Express keeps it that way.”
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Oh yes, that is so polished. As noted by SuperLuke and Nettipo1, the quality of your recording, your friendly tone, and the clear, clear enunciation. Well done!
Regards,
John
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Hello! I really like the quality of your recording… I don’t hear any heater running at all! I like the clarity and pacing of your read, and I also like the friendly nature of your voice. The read has a neutral feeling overall, so I would suggest adding more emphasis on the phrases about keeping things private, as those phrases seem to be the important thing that you are relating to with the listener.
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As my demo day is approaching, I wanted to practice performing a character from “The Legend of Korra”. Zaheer was my favorite villain in the series and I wanted to see if my studio is in good shape.
Please leave your feedback on my recording and performance-
Hi SuperLuke!
First the tone, pace, pitch, etc are all great in this read. If you are looking for quality of recording the room you are in sound nice and silent. However, I had a bit of a hard time hearing you at times, I would check the output of the recording and make sure it’s hitting the correct dB – when I took the Audacity class we were looking for it to hit from -6 to 0. If you are much lower than -12 it’s going to be hard for the person receiving the audio.Best of luck to you in your demo recording!
-Amber-
Thanks for the advice Amber. Yes, I’m in a quiet enough room. And you’re right about the -12/ -6 db thing too. I was trying not to spike in my recording, and I felt more like I was “reading the script” as opposed to performing the Philosophical antagonist. I’ll try it again later, considering your advice.
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Hello everyone, back with some homework, I tried finding scripts that I would most likely be fitting for my voice but regardless, feedback is greatly appreciated!
1) ACURA RDX
Great design challenges more than just the eyes. It challenges the future. We designed the RDX to challenge not just the future of SUVs, but also the future of Acura. The future starts now. The future is the Acura RDX.Acura. Everything we ever imagined. And then some.
2) Pizza Hut
Only Pizza Hut gives you sixteen mozzarella bites on a large pizza!
See kids? Dreams do come true!
The ultimate 2 for 1!
The mozzarella poppers pizza!
Hurry and try it before it’s gone!
No one out pizzas the hut.-
Hi Daniel!
These scripts will be great for you. I agree with Luke – you want to have some variety in your reads. These both came across very similar with inflection, pace and tone. A few more things to consider working on. In your Acura script – you’ll want to watch pronunciation (look up how to pronounce Acura on YouTube). As well, when you say future – it sounds like you are saying feature. So be careful there. I can really tell you are trying to connect the words in each of the sentences, but they are a little to connected and sounds like you aren’t giving yourself enough time to experience the words themselves. Also, a great recommendation from all of my coaches is – who are you speaking to? Think about that for each of the scripts to see if that can help you change them up a bit. Sorry this is a lot! Hope it was helpful!
-Amber -
Good job with the performances and the recordings.
Critique: I would make the 2 commercials sound a little different from each other, it can help you add and explore some of the variety in your voice. Also, maybe add more excitement and enthusiasm in your commercial performance, make the audience want to buy the product, and want to listen to your performance. You sound a little too calm or laid back.
hope this was a helpful critique
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Harvey Home Theatre – 30
He has a 160 IQ, performs cardiac surgery for a living. And now, he can even operate his home entertainment system. Introducing Harvey Home Theater. It’s so sophisticated, it’s simple. Dimensions of sight and sound unheard of, until now. All at your fingertips. Now, if he could only operate the microwave. Home Theater from Harvey, not your ordinary electronics store. Call for the Harvey near you.Big O Tires – 30
Whether your car has small tires…big tires…tires that go fast…tires with extra grip…or tires that just get you from here to there…they can be an unexpected expense! At Big O Tires, we have easy financing available and we have the lowest prices on every kind of tire, every day. If you need tires come to Big O Tires. Check online for all Big O Tires locations.-
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As usual, great job. Diction is on the mark, sound is flawless. Big O Tires nailed it. The Home Theatre – I would add some irony to the acting, I didn’t quite hear it. Hey, normally home entertainment systems are so complicated, you need a grandson to work it ! A brain surgeon just won’t cut it! (d’ja get it?) Or something like that. Also, some of the music background sounded a bit arbitrary, although YMMV on that one.
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I would love some critique of these reads, which may be part of my narration demo. Thanks in advance, everyone!
1. Telephony/Resort Spanglish: Thanks for calling Iberostar Paraíso Lindo México, the highest-rated resort on the Riviera Maya. If you’re ready to play a few rounds of golf, relax on the white sands of Playa Paraíso, and order up a steak and cerveza at Restaurante El Fogón, please stay on the line. One of our booking agents will be right with you.
2. How to/The Perfect Margarita: Mixing a margarita at home is really simple. Prepare some glasses by wetting the rims with a lime wedge and dipping them in salt. Next, fill a cocktail shaker with ice and add lime juice, triple sec, and tequila in a 1:2:3 ratio. Add a squeeze of agave nectar, then shake vigorously until chilled. Strain and pour into the glasses, and garnish with a lime wedge. That’s it! The perfect margarita – easy as 1, 2, 3!
3. Audio Guide/Frank Lloyd Wright House: You’re now in the guest bedroom. Even though it’s small, it’s designed with comfort in mind. Notice the row of windows that lets in plenty of natural light and the warm wood of the built-in desk, cabinetry, and bed frame. Former owners of the house have described the experience of sleeping in bedrooms here like sleeping in a ship’s cabin.
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Hi Jasol,
From my perspective, perfect pitch and pace. All three sounded so professional.
Regards,
John
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Well done! Your higher range is pleasant, friendly, and inviting. Your pacing felt right and the overall quality of your recording was clean. There were two plosives in the margarita read that stood out to me. Other than that, no suggestions.
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Hi Jasol, the Spanish language telephony was nice but the accent probably shouldn’t be used if your not familiar with it, but good try! I like the margarita delivery sounds like a travelouge very well done! The last one is tough to make sound interesting, it just didn’t flow? I like your voice for travelouge type documentaries or commercials on travel, good luck on your demo!
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Hello Edge Studio community Hope everyone is having a great day. I have attached 3 files for homework. Look forward to your feedback.
Thanks-
Hello Jeff,
I thought all the reads were well done, though I think when reading a list, it can tend to be a little bit tricky since it’s important to mention variation within the things in the list, one wouldn’t all the things in the list to sound the same, you want the listener to have options. I also do agree with thinking about who you’re talking to, in order to make it more conversational.
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Hi Jeff,
The first two reads had a good pace and you brought out some nuances in the sentences. It did sound more like a radio announcement, so I would pick someone to speak to so you can sound more conversational.
The last read lacked the “umph” of the first two. “Life is good” fell a bit flat for me.
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I really like your tempo and I think you hit the best words. However, I think your tone sounds more like an announcer and most VO scripts are meant to be conversational. Also, I think you may be trying too hard to finish the script and it’s hurting your pronunciation of certain words. Try relaxing for a moment and just perform the script at a steady pace. I hope this helps.
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