Feedback Forum
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The Edge Studio Feedback Forum is the best place for you to post a recording and get feedback from the community! Record in your home studio, upload the file, and see what people think. This is a great place to get some advice on your technique, on your home studio, or to ask for people’s opinion on your reads. Remember, that this is a community forum, so please remain positive and encourage your peers in helpful ways. If Edge Studio feels that a user is too negative, or antagonizing other members of the community, they will have their posts deleted, and risk being banned from further communication.
Stay positive, listen to each other, and have fun!
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Hello Edge Studio community Hope everyone is having a great day. I have attached 3 files for homework. Look forward to your feedback.
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Hello Jeff,
I thought all the reads were well done, though I think when reading a list, it can tend to be a little bit tricky since it’s important to mention variation within the things in the list, one wouldn’t all the things in the list to sound the same, you want the listener to have options. I also do agree with thinking about who you’re talking to, in order to make it more conversational.
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Hi Jeff,
The first two reads had a good pace and you brought out some nuances in the sentences. It did sound more like a radio announcement, so I would pick someone to speak to so you can sound more conversational.
The last read lacked the “umph” of the first two. “Life is good” fell a bit flat for me.
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I really like your tempo and I think you hit the best words. However, I think your tone sounds more like an announcer and most VO scripts are meant to be conversational. Also, I think you may be trying too hard to finish the script and it’s hurting your pronunciation of certain words. Try relaxing for a moment and just perform the script at a steady pace. I hope this helps.
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Hello everyone,
I have recorded the following narration scripts and would very much welcome any and all feedback, particularly regarding pitch.
Best wishes,
John
1. Walgreens – New Team Members
After more than a century in business, we know what makes a great Walgreens team member. It’s the type of person who values change and excitement. The ones who thrive in a fast-paced environment, ready to learn something new every day. Forward-thinkers. Great communicators. Innovators. People with the drive to succeed – not only for themselves, but also for their co-workers, the company as a whole and the communities we serve. We all come from different backgrounds and bring valuable diverse ideas, but a common mission unites us. And we’re looking for students and recent graduates who are up to the challenge.2. The Julia
You’re listening to the actual recording of “the Julia”. A subsonic moan that doesn’t match the sound of any marine creature ever recorded.
Many biologists will tell you it’s a deep-sea distress call.
And when you listen, it’s easy to see why.
The mysterious howling was captured by deep-sea hydrophones off the coast of Cape Adare.
The same place Nasa captured photographs of a huge, unexplained shadow moving through the water.
It may well be a coincidence, but if the Julia really is a distress call from the deep, perhaps it’s time we answered.
Ninety-five per cent of our oceans remain unexplored.
Are we killing what we’ve yet to discover?3. Voice for the City of Toronto
You know that term “We’re all in this together?” Well, it’s true.
While some of us might be working in government and others not, we’re actually all in the same boat. You see, we’re citizens as well.
We all want the same thing. A city that works for everyone. As fast and efficient and as relevant as can be. Thriving, accessible, and inclusive.-
John, great voice and accent for narration. I really liked your read of The Julia. I do not think it was too slow at all. Just right. I also like your inflections.
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John – I really felt like your pitch and tone were good on all of the reads. Like Kateyln, my feedback would be centered around the pace. The first and last scripts that you have definitely call for a bit faster of a pace to bring more energy into the read. I would work on changing the pace throughout each of these so that there is some differentiation in each of the scripts. Best of luck! Great scripts for your voice!
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Hi John – I just had time to listen to the first upload.
I think you have a lovely upbeat and energetic tone. Very friendly and welcoming. So if that is what you are going for with your tone, then you did very well. The pace was too slow and made it sound like you were reading. If you vary the pace while you are reading that is something we do naturally in conversation. Also, there were times you added a pause between words within sentences. Note how you speak to friends and family. Normally we don’t pause within sentences. We say “ready to learn something new every day.” not “ready (pause) to learn something new every day.” These are little things that make a big difference in smoothing out a read and sounding more conversational. I hope that feedback is useful! 🙂Nice work! I love your David Attenborough voice!
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Hi Katelyn,
Thank you very much for taking the time to provide such constructive feedback. I know I have this challenge with pace and have to keep working at it. Similarly, pausing within a sentence and trying to sound conversational. So, absolutely, your feedback is just what I needed.
Kind regards,
John
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First Homework Assignment is a go! Excited to get feedback and see what I need to work on. This first reel is a Radio Promo, the second is Johnson’s Baby Shampoo. I’d like any feedback that I can. Thanks!
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First of all, you need to invest in a better recording setup. I could barely hear you, but I could make out enough. You had a great tone and tempo in the Radio Promo and I think you hit good words. However, when you were performing the radio station, the time, and the event, you sounded as if you lost your place and picked it up mid-sentence. This in turn lead you to sound lost in what you were trying to express and even sounded like you were trying to remember the event. If you slip up during recording, you must go back to the last comma or period and start over. That makes the script flow better.
The Baby Shampoo on the other hand sounded like you were going all over the place with your overall tone and there were too many pauses. The words you hit were good, but the tone sounded more like a whiny kid begging someone to try their product. I think you ought to find some baby shampoo commercials on YouTube to better understand how they sound and get inspiration. I hope this helps.-
Yes! Thank you. I actually, had some cord interference that I was unaware of until I posted on here. I’ll be posting again soon an update in hopes that the issue is fixed.
As far as my commercials, great feedback. I can definitely hear in myself what you are saying especially in the Johnson’s Baby Shampoo Commercial.
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Here’s a couple more narration practices. I’m a sponge 🙂 absorbing as much info as I can. Any feedback welcome!
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The first read was great, took me by surprise that I had to re-listen, though I think your voice is definitely suited for those types of scripts. For the second one, however, it felt a little bit too fast which made the information a little bit overwhelming. Even so, both good tones on both of the scripts.
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I thought your volume and tone were spot on for the first one in particular. The second read sounded a bit choppy in parts. I had the impression that your were almost over-articulating the syllables in the longer words. I guess if you are shooting for a bit more of a conversational tone you could knock down the formality a degree or two. But great voice!
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Hey Sherry –
Fragrance: Lovely read! I love how you painted a picture in the first half of the perfume thing. I think at 0:14 there could be a transition. When you read the whole thing in the hushed whisper voice, I started to lose focus. If you can come into a full voice for the last part once you hit “Roseau articulates…” (however you spell that) I think that is a good spot for a transition.
Healthcare: Really nice tone and feel for this. When you got to “something as important as healthcare”, you did “upspeak” on the word “healthcare”. When we use upspeak (which is a super millennial thing to do) it sounds less confident, like we are asking a question or are unsure about what we are saying. So you can just remember to always bring it down at the end. “create a partnership” – pronounce “a” as “ah” in scripts. I’d say always unless asked specifically to pronounce it “a”.
I think you lost it a little bit at the tag – you had me up until this point. When you say “Edna and US healthcare… raising a standard for… and the rest of the tag” The tag is super important so give it its gravity. At this point, you can be feeling very proud of this healthcare company because it’s yours. Either you own it or you work there or else you wouldn’t be talking about it. But center yourself in some pride for it and really sell me on why this is important, good, or why I should care.Really nice work!!
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Hi everyone – here are some more practice recordings for my narration homework. Trying different genres to get a feel for what my voice would be suited to. Any and all feedback welcome. Thank you so much!
Autism Awareness:As a parent, you can’t help but look at your child and dream about what the future holds. But while you’re dreaming, consider this – the odds that your child will be diagnosed with autism are 1 in 88. Knowing the signs of autism and catching it early can make a world of difference. To learn the signs visit autismspeaks.org. Brought to you by Autism Speaks and the Ad Council.
Macarons:
Macarons are one of the most popular but also most challenging desserts to get right. We spent many months and made dozens of batches in the pursuit of trying to find a recipe and some foolproof techniques to help you get it right the first time. A perfect macaron should be chewy on the inside and crispy on the outside. First things first, you want to let the egg whites come to room temperature for at least 30 minutes before you get started. Having the egg whites rest is gonna result in a much fluffier, airier meringue. So, protip, a really easy way to separate your white from your yolks is to use your hands or you can alternate between eggshells. Now we can move on to our dry ingredients.Anaconda
Giant snakes have a reputation of being aggressive. The anaconda measures over 16 feet and weighs 180 pounds. Its mouth is like a clamp and an animal struggling to get free only sets the grip tighter. At the same time it sets its bite, the anaconda loops its powerful coils around its victim and begins to squeeze. The process takes little more than a second, hardly enough time to react.-
Your voice is well-suited for narration. The tone you used for each of these scripts matched very well and the words you hit were magnificent. Tempo was a tad slow though and your pauses were a little overdone. I heard a great deal of mouth noises too and I would look for a way to fix that. All in all, you are on the right track. Well done.
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I could honestly listen to you read a book for bedtime stories. Your voice is rather pleasant.
There were times in each segment that it sounded as if you needed air or water. I could hear the movement of your tongue. Then in the macarons read, there were a few words that I felt as if you over emphasized such as chewy and crispy, overall though rather lovely. I rather enjoyed listening to you. -
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I love your tone and energy on all of the reads, they really match the text. Just a technical thing- the Macaron recording was a little quieter than the other two, so you may want to play with the volume settings on the Macaron recording.
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I loved it 🙂
There were a couple moments that the pause was just a tad long making that spot seem a little choppy, but overall, I really enjoyed it! -
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Hi everyone! I’m working on narration homework. I’m still learning the editing part, but any and all comments about the performance are very welcome and appreciated!
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Hi Sherry – love the first one – is that for an audio book? I like the emotion and pitch variety in it. I could listen to your voice in an audiobook.
For the Advance Technology – I think you dropped off a little bit when you say …”policy and procedures” like there is a period there instead of a comma?
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Hey Good morning. Jumping back in with this one. Let me know what you think if you have a moment. I look forward to catching up and listening in.
-M
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You voice seems well suited for this kind of commercial. I kept waiting for you do dig in and go even more “tough guy.” I think that would work.
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Great read – though in my opinion I felt the energy and range of pitch was a little low to start and then picked up half way through. Finished well.
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Good Morning ALL! I am recording my DEMO TODAY!!! So nervous and excited. I JUST want to know if I sound conversational on this read. I didn’t perform any edits so I know there are some plosives and things that you might hear but my goal here is to sound conversational. Please let me know if I am acheiving that goal with this read?
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Hi- I think it sounds conversational for the most part except towards the end (the last sentence) when it sounded rushed and therefore not conversational anymore.
Congratulations on recording ur demo btw! -
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Hi everyone! Here are 2 recordings for any and all feedback. Working on sounding conversational, getting the tone right, pacing, mood, all of it. Let me know what you think. Thank you!!
Mary
Mercury Topaz
It takes more than a single commercial to completely discuss all the advantages of any car. One car recognizes that reality. That car is the Mercury Topaz. Topaz’s approach is quite interesting. It combines front wheel drive, smart traction, and rear suspension. The result is a ride that helps you isolate shock from the driver, while maintaining a superb feel of the road. MERCURY TOPAZ…reaching new heights in automotive technology.Audio Associates
Listen… What do you hear? Nothing. No noise … digital audio purity. The new digital enhanced audio systems from Panasonic will change the way you listen to music. Now listen… What do you hear? Every nuance … crystal clear … like it was meant to sound. So sit down, relax, close your eyes, and get ready for the digital enhanced audio systems from Panasonic. Only at AUDIO ASSOCIATES… there’s no mistaking our sound.-
Agree with what others have said here, mkell. You have a nice voice to listen to. I thought your second read was better than the Topza commercial. On that one, I personally think you could ramp up the cool/s**y factor and vary your pitch inflection more, as was mentioned above.
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Hi Mary,
You have a pleasant tone and your voice is easy to listen to. There were some opportunities to add variety to the pace and pitch in a few sentences that would have changed the feel of both reads. In the Mercury read “One car recognizes that reality.” feels like it should be stated definitively. In Audio Associates, Listen sounds natural the second time you say it, but has no emotion the first time. You’re on the right track!
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Hi Mary!
I thought it was very clear and its obvious that you have been practicing :), good job! I did feel like it was maybe a little obvious that you were reading. Try to imagine speaking to a friend or family member about this new product that you’re excited about and maybe even practice it a few times with a lead in to keep you in the mindset of your normal speech pattern.
-Sherry -
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Hello Mary! you sound very clear but I can tell that both scripts are being read. I heard alot of punctuation pauses as well. I am also working on sounding more conversational. So don’t take my word for it. But you sound very nice and clear. I included an attachment of my attempt to sound conversational with your script. Let me know if I sound conversational at all to you.
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Hi, Your feedback for the following is welcomed and appreciated…thx!
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American Express
Do you know me? Probably not. In my business, recognition is always important, but when I’m buying goods online I prefer a little privacy. With Private Payments from American Express, I get the security of a unique number created for each business transaction I make. Because my private information is my business, and American Express keeps it that way.Purina One Brand 2
Purina One Special Formula For Cats is made with real chicken. Good news for your cat. Great news for your canary. For a complete adult diet for your cat and the real chicken he wants, give him Purina One Special Formula. Your canary will thank you for it. Purina One. Second to none.-
I had the impression that the echo was affecting my evaluation of the read, which seemed really good otherwise. I liked your energy and how much variation in pitch inflection you demonstrated. On the first recording I would land harder on the word “KEEPS it that way.” I am not a great person to give advice on audio equipment but I am getting good results from a higher-end USB mic. Much better than just using the built-in laptop mic.
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Hey 🙂
I thought you sounded pretty good overall. I liked the pacing and the smile. On the Purina read, I felt like you lost a little energy just right at the end. Also, maybe it just didn’t come through very clear, but really make sure you pronounce Purina well.
-Sherry -
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Hi Julie, good reads! I’m hearing a little bit of echo in your recordings. I like your energy in both reads – good pacing and emphasis on key words for both. Good smile in your voice for the second script – good job!
Mary
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Thanks Mary! I was trying to practice finding/hitting some key words so glad that there was some success! 🙂
I am just recording off of laptop speakers, do you have any suggestions on equipment?
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Hi Julie! Sorry it took me so long to respond back to your question, I hope you see this! I was practicing for about 3 months, recording on a free app on my cell phone before I got my first mic, interface, real headphones and PIB (portable isolation booth). Once I started listening through the headphones / interface I could hear so much more vs. just my desktop speakers, which are ok (small Bose set) but harder to hear over other room noise for me. I took the Home Studio 101 class with Dan a while back and took good notes; he has great suggestions. Then I worked with Sweetwater (they have excellent customer service, and no I do not work there or have any connection with the company). They are super helpful in working with you. I suggest the Home Studio 101 class through Edge as it gives you the basics of what to look for once you get your studio set up. I could go on and on! Will check back later. Thanks!
Mary
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