[David Goldberg]

Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!

• This topic was modified 4 years, 8 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 years, 5 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 5 months, 1 week ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 5 months, 1 week ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 5 months, 1 week ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 5 months, 1 week ago by David Goldberg.

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[mara_sherman]

Hi everyone! Here are some practice Narrations I did. Thanks so much for your feedback!

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[cbehrens]

I thought all three of your narrations were clear — well done! It sounded as if you might have been expressing a smile along with the “welcome” statement in the final narration, which matched the tone of a welcome message.

[SteveVO]

Mara, you have a very pleasant voice that I can hear doing these sorts of scripts. I think you could speed up the tempo a little on all three scripts without losing the listener. I think, too, if you took the tonality of the third script and applied it to the first two Delta scripts, it would a little more like you’re talking to the listener. Nice work.

[SteveVO]

Thanks for any feedback. Focusing on travel scripts right now.

Welcome to Hershey, the Great American Chocolate Town, where families come together for a taste of the sweet life. Tucked in the rolling hills of Central Pennsylvania, this idyllic escape offers the latest and greatest in entertainment and hospitality, fused with the traditions of one of America’s original success stories.

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[mara_sherman]

Hi Steve! You sound great, very clear and the recording sounded pro. I would just add a bit more chocolatey sweetness to highlight certain parts maybe to add a little more differentiation. Awesome job!

[SteveVO]

Thanks. I appreciate that.

[John Trape]

Hello everyone,

I am attaching three scripts and would very much welcome any and all feedback.

Thank you,

John

• This reply was modified 4 years ago by John Trape.

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[RYoung]

Good work on this genre John! I like your storytelling ability to connect with the listener, very nice. My only critique would be some of the long pauses in the last two reads, it breaks up the flow, unless you had another reason to separate the lines, not sure?

[John Trape]

I am very grateful for your feedback and I know what you mean about the pauses – I have to work on this.

Regards,

John

[SteveVO]

Thanks for any feedback on this script:
I’d like to welcome you to one of the wonders of the world: the National Gallery of Art. This is one of the most significant and extensive art collections in the world, exhibiting various masterpieces and the only painting by Leonardo found on American soil. The gallery was founded on the initiative of a former United States Secretary of the Treasury, Andrew Mellon. Mellon donated his collection of 121 works of art to the country, which include “St. George and the Dragon” by Raphael and “The Annunciation” by Jan van Eyck, as well as five Rembrandts and several paintings by Titian, in the conviction that other collectors would also be encouraged to do so. Many followed his example and today the gallery has almost 7,500 works that range from Byzantine art to modern day pieces, including, among others, the masterpieces of Leonardo, Vermeer, El Greco, Turner, Monet, van Gogh and Picasso. In the upcoming audio files, I’ll take you on a tour of their works.

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[RYoung]

Hi Steve, pleasant and welcoming audio tour! This one has a lot of lists which you handled very well! The inflections are good as well. I would just invest a little more emotion to entice the listener in describing the museum initially and the last sentence could emphasize “you” and “their works” if that makes sense, great work and good to hear a familiar voice!

[SteveVO]

Thanks!

[mvacc]

Hi All,
Attached is a practice read from the script library:

Jim Henson Museum
Welcome to The Jim Henson museum, located on the very creek where Jim first thought up his alter ego and good friend, Kermit the Frog. Many of Jim’s creations are on display here, and there’s a play area for the youngsters.

Thanks in advance for your feedback!

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[mvacc]

Please disregard my attachments above. I’m having trouble editing / deleting them. Below is the mp3.

Thanks!

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[Jeff Guerrette]

Hello Everyone. Hope you are having a great day. I have attached some files for homework. Look forward to your feedback.

Thank you,
Jeff

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[Christy Spadafore]

Nice job Jeff! I enjoyed all of these reads. I think my comment on all three of them would be to slow down just a bit. Overall I think your pacing is good, but there are one or two places where the words almost slur together and are difficult for me to understand. On the second read, the short lift between “among” and “America’s best” sounds a little at odds with the nice conversational tone you had have going up to that point.
The Coors spot was my favorite. You sounded very natural and genuinely enthused about the product. Good work!

[carynbell]

Working on my some motivational/healing reads. Feedback is always appreciated. Thanks

SOMETIMES THE END IS SUDDEN AND YOU ARE LEFT WITHOUT CLOSURE,
HEARTBROKEN AND UNPREPARED FOR SUCH A SHARP CHANGE

FOR A WHILE, YOU LIVE WITH A MIND THAT IS HALF HERE
AND HALF FULL OF REGRET WONDERING “WHAT IF?”

FOR A WHILE, YOUR HEART ONLY FEELS GRIEF AND YOUR MIND ONLY SEES GRAY

AND THEN LIFE STARTS TO CALL YOU BACK INTO ITS ARENA OF POSSIBILITY;
IT REMINDS YOU THAT ALL IS NOT LOST AND THAT EVEN THOUGH A CHAPTER ENDED, THERE IS STILL A LONGER STORY TO BE TOLD

WITH TIME AND INTENTION, WOUNDS LOSE THEIR HEAVINESS,
HEALING FILLS THE TOUGH PARTS OF YOUR BEING,
AND YOU AWAKEN THE LIGHT OF LOVE WITHIN YOURSELF

IN TIME, YOU WILL RETURN FULLY INTO THE PRECIOUS NOW WITH A HEART THAT FEELS REFRESHED AND READY TO MOVE FORWARD

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[tomnunes]

Such beautiful words, and I certainly hear your heart in the reading of them. Very nice. One thing to pay attention to is a repeated rhythm and melody you slip into on the end of many lines. Listen to “without closure”, “a sharp change”, “sees gray”, “to be told”, and “to move forward”. They all have almost the same notes and downward melody. I think if you spend more time considering who you are talking to, and what you want that person to understand, or feel, then you will break out of this repeated melody and make it sound more authentic. Thanks for sharing this. It is beautiful.

[Bil-Bo]

Alamo Rent-a-Car
If you’re ever near Durango, Colorado, you’ll find a road to the
sky…where a hundred years ago, men searched for the silver and
gold they saw there. There are over one million miles of roads in
Alamo territory, all over America. And every day, with every car
nationwide, only ALAMO gives you all those miles for free, includin’
a seventy mile stretch along route 550 in Colorado, which takes you
to the sky.

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[Toque]

Hi all. Another practice script from the Edge Library, seeking your input and feedback on any and all aspects of this read. Thanks! Toque

Script for MY First Games:

It’s laughing with her at the funny characters. Helping her learn to win, lose and take turns. That’s what MY First Games are all about. They take just a minute, but you’ll give her the most important thing of all…a part of yourself. MY First Games, by Hasbro, Parker Brothers and Milton Bradley.

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[mara_sherman]

Great job! You sound very clear and genuine, and did a wonderful job painting a picture with your voice.

[gabecpotts@gmail.com]

I loved the warmth and specificity in your voice! This is totally subjective but I think maybe injecting a little more energy into your read would serve it well. The tone felt a little overly soothing and calming. In that same vein I think the tempo could be picked up just slightly, mostly cutting down on dead air in between sentences.
Lastly, it sounded like you were losing volume at the ends of sentences, and some final words ended on a whisper – keep the energy and volume going to the end of the sentence!
Great job and hope this helps!

[Toque]

Thanks Gabe! I really appreciate the feedback! T

[Kemsy]

Hello dear people,

My name is Kemal and I am just starting with my voice-over career.
I would like your feedback because I know I need to fix a lot of stuff.
Would you be so kind to point me out what is the first thing I should be working on.

The following example is for a e-learning module.

Thank you very much and have a good day,

Kemal

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[mxavier927]

Hi Kemal, I like your instructional tone for this piece. One piece of feedback I’d give is that, while I understand you want to take your time with e-learning modules to accommodate for different learners, I think there are a lot of pauses between phrases and words that could be shortened. I hope this helps, and that you keep at it!

[Shmuel]

Hi Kemal, first of all, the sound is good, I do not hear noise in the background or distortion. But yes, you need to fix a lot of stuff. You are reading line by line, and people want to hear to talking to them as if you are first thinking of these lines. Yes, it’s an art to be able to do that with someone else’s words. I would suggest you get a one-on-one coach to help you with this. Makes a world of difference.

[Kemsy]

Yeah I get it. Also, my native language isn’t English so I need to practice a lot. Thanks for your feedback sir <3

[Shmuel]

Yes, I got that. We do hear a slight non-native accent there.

[Author]

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