Feedback Forum
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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Hi! This is my first time using the Feedback Forum. I was supposed to do my narration demo later next month, but need tooth surgery on a front tooth, so need to speed things up a bit – LOL! I welcome any input for improvement, especially in regards to breathes (which I’m still unsure about 🙂 ) Thank you for your time and knowledge! Take care!
Marla
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Hi Marla,
Good voice, good audio quality.
Some clicks and breathing sounds, not too much. You can work on this, but it’s not a big problem, IMO.
However, there are other issues, that are more of a problem:
In both reads, you are paying too much attention to the original punctuation in the text. Ignore the punctuation, and use your own. Even periods. Ignore them. Do what’s right for you.
Also, there is no change of pitch or tone to keep my interest.
Keep it moving, there were too many pauses.
New employee at Advanced Technologies: I need to hear your excitement about the growing business, and the fact that the job of a new employee is important. Make it sound important.
Museum: It needs to sound exciting about discovering all that cool stuff that the scientists have discovered. And that you, our dear visitor are going to learn about all that. As an aside, I would consider removing the 12,000 visitors since 1953, because that’s a long time, and not too many people.Wish you success, Marla !
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Tommy John Underwear: Good read! I like how the “here’s the rub” part sounds like you’re telling a secret. My advice is to try adding a little more emotion/excitement to the beginning when you’re announcing the arrival of the underwear – it could show a nice contrast between the arrival “announcement” and the “secret.”
Signet Jewelers: Nice tone and pacing! My one comment would be that “best friend” in “being in love with your best friend” seems a little fast. Since “best friend” comes up again at the end, a little more focus on it when it’s first mentioned could add more importance.
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Hey all! This is my first time in this forum, and I would love any feedback you can provide on a few recent auditions takes. I’m mostly looking for feedback on audio quality, but would also gladly accept notes about performance! Thanks so much, and I’m loking forward to hanging out around here more! 🙂
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Hi Cecilia,
Audio good on both.
Some mouth clicks. My coach told me this is because of a lack of hydration, and one should drink an hour before recording. There is also an option in Audacity to remove the clicks in post production (Effect -> Click Removal).
You have a fun, cute voice, which is good for both of the audio samples.
As an aside, you would be wonderful doing the voice of a Disney Princess, ’cause you ARE a Disney Princess.
Crayola: You started out being uber excited about the wonder markers, and I would tone it down a bit in those first few words. But then “with less mess” is the key, and that needs to be stressed. It was said with the same pitch as everything else, and I would take the pitch of the other text down a bit, and move this up a bit. I would add a TINY pause between “starts” and “with Crayola” at the end.
Suave:Keep it moving, and add some differential acting. That is, the “fancy extensions” is the bad guy, and the “skip the tricks” is the beginning of the good news. I need to hear that this is good news, and right now, everything sounds the same.
My $0.02
I wish you success, Cecelia !
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Nice read & great tone! My advice would be to smooth out the beginning a bit with less pauses. For me, it helps to think about the music that you’re talking about when reading.
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Howdy! I’m currently developing my commercial chops with the aim of recording my demo in June. Feel free to have a listen to these samples and let me know what you think. Thanks!
Commercial 1: Chevrolet
Some things, are better left to the experts.
Chevrolet…Change, that’s smart!Commercial 2: US Army Reserve
Train near home…be ready when needed. This is not your everyday job. Call 1800-USA-ARMY or visit goarmyreserve.com. -
Greetings All!
Two submissions: Wall Street Journal
Part of my “homework” is to slow myself down and learn to “make my mouth do what I want it to do”!
Please comment on Tempo, Volume, Pitch, Tone and Diction?
WSJ EDIT is my natural voice, Wall Street Journal#3 I embellished to sound more “authoritative”(?)
Thanks!
Don (ps: I am my own worst critic!!)-
First recording, the sound was not good. But I’m sure you know that. Still, I could tell you’ve got a good voice.
Second recording, the sound is good. It sounded a bit too much like you were reading the words, and not talking to someone. I agree with Mark that you should concentrate on talking to someone. And put a tad of irony in “full serving” as if you are eating the WSJ. -
Love the tone of your voice, Don! One thing that can possibly help your read is to establish who you’re specifically speaking to and in what context. That can then inform you and naturally bring out a more authoritative quality from within your performance (as if you’re speaking to a son, niece, etc.), rather than trying to do a similar take but with an “authoritative filter” added to it. Hope this helps!
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Here’s a question for you: what do you do with a wordy script that limits you to a certain time? How do you sound natural and un-rushed, while rushing to keep it at the specified time limit? I’d love to know what you think of this sample. Thanks!
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Ohmygawd, you nailed it. I don’t know how you did it, but you did it.
I got it all the first time around.
Maybe tweak the diction around the word “insomnia”, but it’s very subtle.
Better yet, if it’s not broken, don’t fix it.
And it ain’t broken.
I like the slight chuckle when you said 4AM. It was *very* subtle, but enough that I got it, and it was in the right place.
You’re hired! -
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One possible tip for not rushing through the copy is to think of flowing from word to word rather than running. Your mouth may still need to move at the same speed regardless to stay within the 15 seconds, but your intention and more lax/comfortable attitude can affect your delivery and expand each word. Hope that helps since it’s helped me slow down my reads!
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Wow, you have a good voice. But please take a note that you were saying so much that I had to re-listen a couple times to know what you were saying.
Have you looked at the Words-to-time calculator? There’s an exercise I learned where you try to maintain and get all the words out within a certain amount of time, involving muscle memory and a pen between your teeth. It helps train your mouth to stay open while getting words out. But don’t have the pen in your mouth while recording, it’s just a muscle memory exercise.
I also learned that as far as vocal speed, try and elongate some of the words to maintain the pace, try sounding fast in the beginning. Then slow down enough to make your point; putting insomnia to rest, and gradually speed up again if you have to; like when a video game announcer says, “Buy it now while supplies last”.
hope this was a helpful comment.
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