Feedback Forum

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  • #15468
    David Goldberg
    Edge Studio Staff

    The Edge Studio Feedback Forum is the best place for you to post a recording and get feedback from the community! Record in your home studio, upload the file, and see what people think. This is a great place to get some advice on your technique, on your home studio, or to ask for people’s opinion on your reads. Remember, that this is a community forum, so please remain positive and encourage your peers in helpful ways. If Edge Studio feels that a user is too negative, or antagonizing other members of the community, they will have their posts deleted, and risk being banned from further communication. 

    Stay positive, listen to each other, and have fun!

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  • #67129
    mara_sherman
    Participant

    Hello! Here are some Narration practice scripts I worked on for homework. Thanks in advance for your feedbacK!

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  • #67127
    SteveVO
    Participant

    Practicing a more conversation read. I did two takes with two different audiences. I’d welcome your feedback.

    Most of us know there are ways we can improve… to be healthier… happier… more effective… but knowing how to improve is a different matter. Without guidance, we often simply stay the same.
    Welcome to Weelearn – a platform where well-known experts and authors can help you get stronger in all areas of your life. Using the Weelearn video library, you can protect your body, strengthen your mind and spirit, become a more positive influence in your relationships, pursue success more confidently at work, and so much more. Our experts are taken from fields of hard science, like psychology, but also areas of broader wisdom, like spirituality. And with videos broken up into digestible parts, and supplemented by exercises and games, the next step to your best self is truly only a few clicks away.
    Don’t be stuck in life, love, work – or anything! Try Weelearn for yourself today.
    Weelearn – learning through watching.

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    • #67169
      nadiaverde
      Participant

      I really enjoyed your first take. You sounded more connected to your audience. Very nice conversational tone. I would definitely slow it down a bit as both takes sounded a bit rushed (the second more so than the first). Overall great job!

      • #67185
        SteveVO
        Participant

        Thanks! I appreciate it.

    • #67161
      JustJohn
      Participant

      There’s a lot of good stuff here. You’ve got a good tone going for this script. I wonder if you might just slow it all down a little. Some parts are read so quickly (particularly in the second reading), your articulation seems to suffer a bit as a result. The opposite side of that coin is that it sometimes sounds like you’re paying so much attention to articulation that some of the flow is sacrificed (e.g., “supplemented by exercises and games”). I hear a couple cadences that are so similar that the “shape” of the read gets a little repetitive — for example, “where well-known experts and authors can help you get stronger” in the first reading — it sounds a little like you’re repeating the same musical phrase several times. I wonder if “life, love, work” could be varied just a little more. In general, your tone is very engaging and naturally conversational, and the read is pleasant to listen to. Good work!

      • #67186
        SteveVO
        Participant

        Thanks! I appreciate it.

      • #67166
        SuperLuke
        Participant

        The Second take was louder: as far as recording quality and clarity. As far as performances: the first take had more of an emotional connection to the audience. Maybe try finding a good balance of both reads by doing a third take, combining the best of both reads?

    • #67139
      mara_sherman
      Participant

      Your voice sounds great, it’s really warm and inviting and you have great pitch variation. My only critique is that there are some pauses you could do without, and maybe just a little bit more excitement. Awesome job!

  • #67123
    AyalC93
    Participant

    Hiya folks! Leaving my homework here for feedback. Thanks!

    1) Diamonds – Documentary
    Today, seventy percent of the world’s rough diamonds pass through the central selling organization, the ESO, established by Debiers at Charterhouse Street in London. To regulate the flow of diamonds and maintain stability of prices on the world market, diamonds are first classified and valued. Here, along the north wall, in natural light, experts sort stones into more than five thousand different categories; based on size, shape, quality and color.

    2) 4/H – Corpo
    It began with the seed of an idea. In 1902, the heartland needed folks to embrace new advances in agriculture. But leaders with open minds, strong hearts and willing hands weren’t in abundance. Luckily, kids were. By empowering the next generation to lead, 4/H took root. And grew. Grew kids who are confident and strong. Who are curious enough to question. And capable enough to find the answer. True leaders aren’t born. They’re grown. 4/H GROWS HERE.

    3) Betty Crocker – Biography
    Betty Crocker is an imaginary person. Nonetheless, in a 1945 survey she was named the second-best-known woman in America, after Eleanor Roosevelt. She was “born” in 1921 during a Gold Medal flour promotion in which users completed a puzzle to win a pin cushion. Company executives decided to use the signature of “Betty Crocker” on the prize letters–Betty because the name had a warm approachable feel, and Crocker after an early company director, William G, Crocker. The fictional Ms. Crocker became so popular that she soon had her own products and recipe books, many of which still exist today.

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    • #67141
      Sherry Newell
      Participant

      Hey there! I really enjoyed your 4/H read :). It felt more like you were talking to someone rather than just reading out loud and I enjoyed the rhythm of it.
      I felt like your levels where a little too high in all 3, but really in the Diamonds read the most. You can check that while you’re recording, or even just try taking a small step away from your mic.
      Good job and have fun continuing your practice!

  • #67120
    Jabrony
    Participant

    Hey, this is just some homework for Art’s sessions with me.

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    • #67184
      suecat
      Participant

      Hey Jabrony,
      I liked the Hershey read! I felt like I was there in the museum, beautifully done. The plant earth one sounded a little rushed, still a great voice!

    • #67182
      MarkosKandilis
      Participant

      I’m really enjoying the rich timbre of your voice! You’ll have no problem with bringing gravitas to your reads on a dime. A few points you may find useful to consider could be:

      • avoid sounding choppy with excessive pauses that break up the cohesiveness of your delivery
      • add variety to the pitch intonation you utilize at the end of sentences, as these reads can come off as slightly monotonous when always ending downward in pitch
      • reduce the distance in pitch that your voice travels when emphasizing; it’s good practice to raise your pitch for emphasis, but doing it with such a jump between words one sentence after the other can give an unsettling bounce throughout your read that detracts from the text itself

      Hope this helps, and thanks for sharing!

    • #67181
      SuperLuke
      Participant

      Good recording quality. Was your homework from Art Bruder? I’ve taken a class of his to make sure I have the best recording quality when using audacity. What was the homework, documentary narration? You have a great voice for narration in these recordings!

  • #67112
    aylinsings
    Participant

    Hi!

    Some commercial homework. Working on trying to sound conversational and not presentational! Also, working on not pitching down at the end of my sentences too much. Any feedback is appreciated. Thank you!!

    Waterpik:
    If you floss you know what a two-handed tug of war feels like. Which is why we at Waterpik are introducing the Flosser. At a speed of 10,000 gentle strokes per minute, its nylon tip effectively removes plaque above and below the gumline. Making it a fast, easy and more convenient way to keep gums their healthiest, and teeth their cleanest. With no strings attached.

    Cellular One:
    Here’s what I know. I know how to house train a dog. I know long division. I know deep down that most pro-football players are big sissies. I know life is really like a box of chocolates. I know that the big secret to the Crying Game is that it was a c****y movie. I know what time it is. I know Shakespeare new er wrote a play called “I Love To Go Swimming”. Okay, so I know a lot of useless stuff. But one thing I know that is useful, is where to buy a cell phone. And that’s Cellular One. Call 1-800-cell-talk.

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    • #67140
      mara_sherman
      Participant

      Great job! I think you sound very conversational and not presentational at all. I think you could have had even more fun with the Cellular One read, maybe just add bit of a different character to each of the facts. Fantastic work!

  • #67110
    SteveVO
    Participant

    A little travelogue. Thanks for any feedback.

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    • #67115
      aylinsings
      Participant

      Hi Steve!

      I really enjoyed your voice and your read! It is a solid take! The only not I have is that you should try to connect with the words a bit more. Im hearing you say all of these wonderful things about this town, but im not feeling you see it if that makes sense?

      Hope that helps!

      Aylin

  • #67102
    taylorn.quinn
    Participant

    Hi all! I am back with another narration reading, this time with an Amelia Earhart Biography opening. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated!
    Thank You!
    Taylor

    Script:
    Nicknamed “Lady Lindy”, Amelia Earhart was the first woman to fly solo across the Atlantic.

    SOT- Its a nice day for it.

    Her speed and distance records earned her the Distinguished Flying Cross, an honor previously only bestowed on men.

    SOT: for your service….first women… applause.

    While serving as a nurse during World War I,

    SOT- battle sounds….men suffering.

    Earhart developed an early concern for her fellow man,
    that helped her champion
    human rights around the world.

    CU of her flying…

    Tonight, On Biography Amelia Earhart. Pilot Soldier activist author.
    Lower third show title.

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    • #67137
      nadiaverde
      Participant

      Your voice is so easy to listen to! Very lovely read. It sounded very natural. My only critique would be to try to vary your delivery a bit to keep the listener engaged, but overall very nice. Great job!

  • #67092
    Jorjecat09
    Participant

    Trying this again with the conversion to MP3! Hi Everyone – This is my first time posting and actually hearing my recorded voice. Sending this in for homework. Totally looking forward to your honest feedback. The first is Peet’s Coffee, second is History Channel and the third is Honey Bunches of Oats. Thanks!

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    • #67205
      blue967fm
      Participant

      Hi Jorjiecat! Welcome to the forums! For being completely new to VO (which I am as well), you have a great start! I love the story you tell with your voice. There is a relaxing quality to it that makes me think that you would do well with audiobook narration, perhaps with some coaching.

      I wanted to ask what you use to record the audio? There is a lot of background noise (perhaps cars passing by?).

      In Peet’s Coffee, the biggest thing that I noticed was that I detected an East Coast accent on the first syllable of “character.” I only bring this up in case you didn’t notice, and because that word comes up quite a bit in the script. The accent was a lot less present on the second syllable of “America,” though.

      Your History Channel spot was my favorite! Your tone was great for this type of ad, and I enjoyed your choices of where (and for how long) to pause. I think it sounds like you’re going below your natural low range at times in this ad (especially on “before our time” and “a thousand lives”), which you may want to work on.

      I loved the energy in the Honey Bunches of Oats spot! When you described the ingredients of the cereal, I had a vivid picture in my head. In the end, however, I thought maybe you could try to work on your inflection on “a cereal my whole family loves” – perhaps not breaking it up in the middle and ending in a more downward inflection, but without losing the energy that you already have.

      I hope my notes helped! Again, great start!

      Stuart

      • #67239
        Jorjecat09
        Participant

        Hi Stuart!! Thank you so much. I can’t thank you enough for such fantastic feedback. This has helped a great deal. I totally hear and agree with all of your critiques. I’ll pay more attention to my tone, annunciations and inflection. You’re the best! On to the next one

  • #67089
    mvacc
    Participant

    Hi All,
    Attached is a practice read from the script library:

    Jim Henson Museum
    Welcome to The Jim Henson museum, located on the very creek where Jim first thought up his alter ego and good friend, Kermit the Frog. Many of Jim’s creations are on display here, and there’s a play area for the youngsters.

    Thanks in advance for your feedback!

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    • #67116
      aylinsings
      Participant

      Hi!

      You have such a great tone and quality to your voice that definitely suits these kinds are scripts. I thought it was a fabulous read! The only thing I heard was an east coast type accent specially in the words ‘very’ and ‘thought.’ As a Chicagoan, it slips into my reads as well. I am only mentioning it so you are conscious of it!

      Great work and keep it up!

      Aylin

  • #67086
    ericazetti
    Participant

    Hi everyone! Just started training and here’s my first HW assignment. Looking forward to your feedback!

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    • #67091
      mvacc
      Participant

      Secret: Good energy.

      Universal Studio: Great read. I like the little chuckle, makes it seem authentic. My only note would be that the energy goes down a bit at the end. The tag lost some of the emotion and comes off more monotone.

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