Feedback Forum

[David Goldberg]

The Edge Studio Feedback Forum is the best place for you to post a recording and get feedback from the community! Record in your home studio, upload the file, and see what people think. This is a great place to get some advice on your technique, on your home studio, or to ask for people’s opinion on your reads. Remember, that this is a community forum, so please remain positive and encourage your peers in helpful ways. If Edge Studio feels that a user is too negative, or antagonizing other members of the community, they will have their posts deleted, and risk being banned from further communication. 

Stay positive, listen to each other, and have fun!

• This topic was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 3 years, 10 months ago by David Goldberg.

Topic

[JasonCawley]

Any feedback is appreciated, thanks.

So what is the fate of the universe? how does it all end? Cosmologists have thought about this for a long time. Many have come to the conclusion that the end will come in more of a whimper then a bang. it is known as the “heat death”. and it begins with a decrease in the rate of star formation. looking up in the southern sky allows us to see a hint of this process.

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[Erik B]

Hi Jason, great voice. I liked this recording. Your pacing sounds good, and you differntiate well from sentence to sentence. Also the recording quality sounds solid. Good job.

[erichardson001]

Looking for feedback on my contest entry from last month (Amelia Earhart). Thanks

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[JasonCawley]

Hey Eric,

I love your tone for this type of read. Just keep a listener in mind when you’re doing this type of read, like you’re talking to someone who is super interested but might be younger to get it more conversational. I think it would help to get some space between “an” and “enigma”

[Jorjecat09]

Hi Everyone! Posting again for homework for the second time. I’m uncertain if I’m my own worst critic or if these recordings are decent. Please let me know your honest opinion. The first is Carnation Breakfast Essentials, Atlanta Bread Company and Pickeball.

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[ryanp.bogie]

Happy Mother’s Day everyone! Here are the recordings for my homewok. Thank you so much for everyone who left feedback on my earlier posts. I tried my best to implement what you said in my new recordings. Any additional feedback is always welcomed.

Thank you once again!
-Ryan Bogie

Crayola Markers
Crayola Color Wonder Markers color only on special paper. So your kids can express their creativity more often…in more places…with less mess. Crayola Color Wonder. It starts with Crayola.

YouTube Red
Like watching YouTube? Like watching the 30 second ads at the beginning of videos? Didn’t think so. With a YouTube Red subscription, you could watch as many ad-free videos you like, offline. You can even listen to videos in the background when you open another app, and have access to exclusive content made by YouTube creators themselves. All this for only $9.99 a month, with a one-month free trial.

Mickey’s Not-So-Scary Halloween Party
HALLOWEEN… WITH A DISNEY TWIST!
 The witching hour’s almost here, so get your favorite costume ready for Mickey’s Not-So-Scary Halloween Party, a special event in Magic Kingdom park!
It’s the happiest haunting on Earth! Don’t miss your chance to collect candies, sweets and frightfully delightful treats—all while the park hosts grim grinning ghosts, eerie entertainment and Disney Characters that go bump in the night.
Best of all: since the tone of this event is “not-so-scary,” that means children of every age can enjoy the fun!

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[Erik B]

Hi Ryan. I’ll share with you my notes for each of the three reads.

Crayola – good tempo and pacing. The Crayola Color Wonder line sounded like it ended with upspeak, watch out for that. Good recording quality

You Tube Red – This was my favorite of the three recordings. Good build-up as the read continues. In the fourth sentence like, offline needed a pause. Good recording quality.

Mickey’s Halloween – good character. Sentences with exclamation marks needed to be accentuated more/more umph. Good recording quality.

Overall good job.

[blue967fm]

Hey everyone, and happy Mother’s Day! I thought this may be a fun comparison. I took some ads that I recorded 4-5 years ago for a friend’s former experimental Internet stations (which gave me great practice back then) and rerecorded them. I’ll send both recordings for each to compare, starting with the re-recorded versions.

I no longer have the emails with the scripts on them, so I wrote up a transcript for each ad based on my old recordings.

I would love any feedback that you may have! Thank you so much!

New Jersey Transit
Need a better way to get around? Need to get somewhere faster? Need a service you can rely on 24/7? New Jersey Transit trains get you to your destination on time without delay or hassle. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the scenery of New Jersey throughout your journey. If a train is not necessary to get where you need to be, try the NJ Transit bus. The bus will help you get to your destination without delay or stall. New Jersey Transit – the way to go. Learn more at njtransit.com.

NextRadio
Have you been listening to the radio online, where it just seems to do nothing but buffer? Don’t you wish it would just play the music? Well, with the NextRadio app, you can listen to all FM music and talk stations in your area right over the air! No buffering or payments required. You can even call or text station DJs straight from the app. Get NextRadio today! Downloadable from the Google Play Store. Check your local phone carriers. If you can’t get NextRadio, call your carrier and ask them to turn on the FM radio chip in your phone. Start listening to local radio on your smartphone today!

Rhode Island SPCA
Do you love pets? Ever wish you had one of your own? Have you checked out the Rhode Island SPCA yet? They have all kinds of adoptable pets from dogs to cats and everything in between. Meet Annika. Annika is a four-year-old pit bull terrier who was brought in because her owners lost their home. She spent the last few months of her time with them living in a car, and they thought it would be fair to bring her to Rhode Island SPCA. The owners say that she is very loving, gets super excited, but can be anxious. Annika loves to play, she loves car rides, and she also loves snuggles from her favorite people. To learn more about Annika, and to adopt, visit rispca.com.

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[blue967fm]

Hey everyone – just for comparison’s sake, here are my old recordings of these ads. The NJ Transit ad was originally recorded in February 2016, the NextRadio ad in June 2016, and the RI SPCA ad in April 2017 (which I compressed much more heavily than the other two). I also tend to pronounce Annika differently upon first glance than I did back then (although I never did figure out the correct pronunciation for this context).

(As you may have heard, I amplified the new recordings of these ads but didn’t process or compress them.)

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[Jeff Guerrette]

Hello Edge Community looking for some feed back with the 3 commercials I did for homework.

Thanks,
Jeff

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[JasonCawley]

Hey Jeff, overall great feel on these three. GNC felt a little over compressed, the other two sounded good recording quality wise.

GNC – Great pacing and energy right off the bat, drags a touch in the middle, try to keep the energy throughout the whole read.

Panasonic – Love to hear you open up a little more, maybe take a bit of a longer pause after asking the listener to listen.

Ridgid – Good energy throughout here, maybe try and hit the last “Ridgid” a little harder, but honestly it’s solid without any changes.

Great work! Keep it up! Nothing felt like a script read, felt very natural.

[Amitofu]

Hey all.
Trying to fine tune my believability. Let me know what you think or if you have any cool tips.

///

Only Ziploc brand bags have a unique interlocking zipper to lock in freshness in a way no other bag can. When it comes out this fresh, you know it went in a Ziploc bag. Ziploc. We’ve got a lock on freshness.

—

Kids hate the word ‘no’. As in ‘no’ you can’t stay up late, ‘no’ you can’t have more ice cream and ‘no’, you may not paint the cat. ‘No, no, NO!’ Well isn’t it time for a yes? We think so. Six Flags Great Adventure. Yes!

—

My child has quite an imagination. His teachers say that some day he’ll be doing great things. Right now, he’s already an architect, a designer, an engineer … I think he’s a creative genius … and thanks to Legos, the creative building toy, there’s just no limit to what he can do. LEGOS … the creative diversion that helps develop a child’s potential.

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[Riquelmi]

Hi Amitofou,

I really liked the second one about the kids- your tone was fun, dynamic and i BELIEVED you. I especially liked the way you said the YES at the end.

good job,
Riquelmi

[SuperLuke]

Here’s my finished, and produced V.O. Demo with Edge Studio.

Please feel free to leave your feedback and tell me what you think of my first V.O Reel

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[Erik B]

Hi Luke, congrats on a great demo. The McFatty’s part had me cracking up. Great job Man!

[RYoung]

Hi Luke, Congrats on a great demo! I like the Bain character, great work and good luck!
Rich

[SuperLuke]

Thank you, RYoung. It was a great experience for me to train with Jay Snyder. My Bane character was more of a Lex Luthor. I like using my lower register.

[Amitofu]

Not half bad. The first two really sold me.
If I may be so bold as to say what I immediately picked up on (because everyone kinda does it, myself included, in the aspiring stages) : I would be cautiously aware of this general pattern as well as this instance – When you say in the 3rd ad “Tonight! Tonight You must save us from the dragon in(?) the volcano” – It kinda does this whisper-shout thing that breaks the immersion. You need to not sound as if you were afraid of waking up someone in the next room, (which means really honing your gain on your interface and talking candidly with your sound engineer). Your acting and energy is there, but the projection needs to sound like you are actually shouting at someone (which again, isn’t easy tech wise). It’s kinda like we pick up on the subconscious hesitation to the raw volume that an angry/loud person ‘would’ have. So I’d say half is actor technique (sound like you are really chewing someone out! pantomiming if nessicary) and after that it’s trial and error to see what your equipment can handle at what settings. I’d practice ‘sounding’ loud without actually being loud. be passionate like a military drill instructor who is nose-to-nose with a ensign – They are intense and intent, but controlled. Sorry if I can’t quite put it to words.

Other than that, I’m sure your coach talked to you about having a separate character and commercial demo. I recogninsed the McFatty ad from the “Voice Over – Voice actor” book (Yuri Lowenthal). In terms of character demo, I’d create a different script because it sounds like a commercial, and also it needs to be unique from what anyone else is doing.

I can definitely see you’ve improved quite bit from when you first started uploading. Casting by character demos (for major productions) is just extremely selective with very few second shots given (so I’m told). At anyrate, rather you decide to hold off or not, don’t be discouraged. You have potential, but characters are highly competitive so even amongst perfect demos, it can be luck of the draw or who do you know/network with. I’m telling myself as much as you, haha. It’s a tough road, but if it’s something you love, don’t quit.

Take care and feel free to ask for elaboration (not that this isn’t already long-winded, haha)
-Alex M

[SuperLuke]

Thank you for your comment and critique, Alex.
The First Two characters of mine were the most fun to perform as: a Lex Luthor homage and a Maverick, Clint Eastwood homage.

Please note that my third character is saying, “Sir Knight, you must save us from the dragon…as a Cockney. It’s not “Tonight”, it’s “Sir knight…”

I know my Character Demo must be different from my Commercial demo. But one of my characters was a DJ and my coach thought I could perform it very well. Jay Snyder and I collaborated my DJ’s awesome, yet humorous radio personality, inserting “McFatty’s”, at the very last minute while we were recording together with the engineer, Kevin. Kevin suggested where I should put the Gain at and he picked all of the takes himself, out of the 72 I made of everyone in the demo in those 2 hours.

I also know the V.O world is very picky about casting and that the first words out of your mouth tell the Director everything they need to know about if you’re fit for the part.

[carynbell]

Hey everybody!

Trying to work on improving diction and adding variety. Feedback is appreciated as always!

Thanks!

9 PLANETS

About 12 billion years ago, scientists think, from a singular explosion, the universe was born. In those first moments, intensely hot hydrogen and helium raced outward – thinning, cooling, and clumping into vast, organized structures.
Within a few billion years, countless galaxies had emerged. Each one containing hundreds of billions of stars – constantly changing in cycles of birth, death and rebirth. In one of these galaxies, about 5 billions years ago, one average-sized star, our sun, captured in its gravitational field the gas and dust that would become 9 planets.

OFFICIAL ALASKA PLANNING VIDEO

This Official Alaska Vacation Planning Video is filled with plenty of breathtaking scenes. But more important, it’s loaded with all the information you need for planning a trip to Alaska. Like when to go, what to wear, and what to see. So if you’ve got Alaska on your mind, you’re going to love this video. Let’s begin with snow sports. This is definitely the place. For cross-country and down-hill skiing. For snow boarding, tobogganing, and even ice fishing.

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[Amitofu]

Hey carynbell,
I agree with andrea that the Alaska one needs a bit more energy; like you’re actually there breathing in the mountain/snowy air. What ‘may’ help with articulation (more in the astronomy one) is adjusting your distance to the mic as well as your speaking volume. Felt maybe like you were a little quiet and adjust your tech around that instead of the other way around. If you want a more elaborate tech dissection, let me know, but if you’re just using a non-pro studio for practice, I won’t overload you, haha.

[Andrea]

Hi,
Love your demo! Great character voices. How long did it take you to get here?
Hope you can book lots of work 🙂
Andrea

[Andrea]

Hi,
Sorry, for some reason, the message intended for SuperLuke keeps getting posted here.

Here’s the feedback I meant to give you:
You sound knowledgeable; I like that.
9 PLANETS: It seemed to me that some of the Ss and Rs were maybe to soft. Words like hydrogen, organized, average-sized, gas could be articulated more clearly.
ALASKA: Maybe you could put a bit more energy into the read to make it sound more inviting? Also, you could find the elements in the lists at different pitches to add variety.
Keep up the good work!

[VO_by_SJ]

Hello all!

I am in the process of preparing for my narration demo record. Just uploading a couple of samples (not exact pieces from my demo) here for feedback/practice. Looking for more creative and technical critiques, rather than audio quality related ones.
Thanks!
Sara Jester

Script 1: Creativity

Creativity is not the same as hard work or effort, it requires genuine inspiration. It’s the product of a mind thoroughly intrigued by a question, a situation or a possibility. Therefore creativity does not come in exchange for money or rewards, but when we focus our attention on something because we want to.

Script 2: Starbucks About

Every day, we go to work hoping to do two things: share great coffee with our friends and help make the world a little better. It was true when the first Starbucks opened in 1971, and it’s just as true today.

Back then, the company was a single store in Seattle’s historic Pike Place Market. From just a narrow storefront, Starbucks offered some of the world’s finest fresh-roasted whole bean coffees. The name, inspired by Moby D**k, evoked the romance of the high seas and the seafaring tradition of the early coffee traders.

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[Erik B]

Hi Sara, I enjoyed both reads, I’ll share with you my notes for each read after listening a couple of times.

Creativity – great tone, good pacing, emphasized key words well.

Starbucks – great tone, good pacing, emphasized key words nicely, liked in particular, “”world’s finest fresh-roasted whole bean coffees.”

Great job, you’re going to do well with your demo. Thumbs up.

[SuperLuke]

Hi Sarah, I enjoyed the performance. There weren’t any tech problems and the performances were both really well done. I guess it depends on the kind of Voice Over Demo you are aiming for. If you’re aim is to be a commercial V.O talent, I think you are in the right spot with your performances. I was taught in an Audition class that sometimes the first words you say will be what the casting director look for. I was also taught that the goal of voice actors is to emphasize the key words that the director wants to hear.

I think you will do just fine when it comes to doing your demo. Remember that we’re all here for you and that your coach is your best friend as well as your teacher!

Hope this was a helpful comment and critique

[Author]

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