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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Hi everyone,
I have three commercial readings and would be very grateful for any and all feedback.
Regards,
John
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Meet Ricky
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Jaguar
I was born fast. Faster than those who would challenge me. I was born strong. Quiet in confidence. And blessed with might. I was born with instinctive quickness. Quick to recognize. To adapt. To respond. Quick to be quick. I was born to be seen by everything but the wind. I was born at the beginning of the last century, but I am undoubtedly of the next century. I am Jaguar. Born to perform.
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Hey John!
Are you kidding me!! Your accent and Jaguar!! Sold! But; I did this piece as well, my take on your read would be to be a bit more driven (no pun intended), tougher perhaps? A Jag is performance and speed as well as luxury.
The other two, nice, a little less “stiff upper lip” and those p’s and consonants are popping out.
Rock On! -
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Hey everyone, I just finished a Telephony audition and was hoping for some feedback. Do I sound calming and able to keep customers enthusiastic and less likely to hang up? Am I pursuading you to purchase LG products?
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Hello! Your voice is pleasant and friendly and clear…very suitable for this kind of script. The tone, energy level, and pacing are good, but I think the commercial portion of the script needs to be more differentiated from the telephony part, and more conversational. To test the conversational part, I usually ask myself if it sounds like someone next to me in line at a store talking to me, or me talking to them… Since it’s almost like an aside that calls your attention to something else for a brief moment, you might want consider using a slightly different energy or pacing with the commercial part; again, to differentiate from the telephony part a little.
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All comments welcome!
Coors Banquet Beer
Hardwork has it’s rewards and since 1873, Coors Banquet has rewarded efforts like yours with a beer made the hard way. Only using rocky mountain water and the best country barley found, the beer is an uncompromising stance that shares several distinctions that hard workers do. So for those like-minded, Coors Banquet beer may be an excellent choice for those that enjoy reaping the rewards of hard work. So roll up your sleeves we’ve got a banquet waiting for you! Coors the Banquet Beer.-
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Firstly, your voice is amazing for this type of read. Calm and crystal clear. But I echo the statements of the previous 2 posters that it sounds a LITTLE too read-y and not quite conversational enough. When you say “the hard way”, it sounds like there should be more, but the sentence ends and the next one begins. When you say “the best country barley”, try to actually imagine that you believe its the best country barley you’ve ever experienced and you’re trying to convince someone who’s a little reluctant to believe you of that fact.
Pacing is great. The recording itself sounds great, too.
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Hi Tim,
Your voice is indeed suited for this type of ad, but you do need to make it conversational, maybe think of this, you just met me, I’m scheduling an event, and looking to provide some great beer for my guests, don’t tell to me about your product, talk to me about it, what makes it so great, why would I want to choose Coors banquet Beer. Your pacing was great.
Good luck! -
Your voice is very fitting for this type of script and I think you pulled off a fitting tempo and hit the right words. Your read doesn’t sound too natural though. To pull off a conversational read, you need to speak each sentence like a statement whenever it doesn’t have a question mark or an exclaimation. Your read doesn’t match the words either, made the strangeness all the more obvious. I hope this helps.
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Hi VO Community, I am practicing various energy levels, volume…and well, just about everything! I am open to any feedback you can provide. Thank you!
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WOW! You’ve nailed the tone, tempo, and pitch from beginning to end. Your reads both sound super conversational and your voice is a perfect fit for Sesame Place. You don’t go over-the-top and you have a fantastic recording setup. Only thing I have to point out is you paused in between some sentences. It may have been for barely more than half a second, but I noticed. Pauses should always be left for periods, commas and other full stops. All in all, I think your reads are fantastic.
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Hello Everyone! Working on a commercial script. I would love to hear feedback on delivery. I will also attach the script for your convenience:
Introducing SRX, Cadillac’s all-new performance utility that raises the bar inside and out. Inside: SRX offers seating for seven and the UltraView roof, which gives first- and second-row passengers an unprecedented open-air riding experience. Outside: SRX has available Magnetic Ride Control, the world’s fastest-reacting suspension system. The result is maximized road contact that allows the driver to feel every S-curve and the thrill of every straightaway. The praise is high. So is the bar.
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Well, I think you have a great voice and your enunciation of words was well placed. I don’t think you sound conversational though, that’s because you’re stopping abruptly and at one point in the middle of a sentence. To sound conversational, you have to say it like a statement. Also, the tone doesn’t sound much like a car commercial. Most every car commercial is the same so try listening to some for inspiration.
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Hey! This is 4/H take-2! Thank you Nettipo1! I think this is a little better. I’ve added the script!
It began with the seed of an idea. In 1902, the heartland needed folks to embrace new advances in agriculture. But leaders with open minds, strong hearts and willing hands weren’t in abundance. Luckily, kids were. By empowering the next generation to lead, 4/H took root. And grew. Grew kids who are confident and strong. Who are curious enough to question. And capable enough to find the answer. True leaders aren’t born. They’re grown. 4/H GROWS HERE
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Hi suecat, this is a great take 2! I definitely noticed more emotion behind your words. I would try delivering the last three sentences in a different emotion…right now it sounds almost sassy, and perhaps it should be more resolute (I don’t know if this is the right word). I agree with TimDKietzman that your tempo was a bit faster than needed. Keeping in mind that your voice is supporting the visuals on screen might help you slow down. Good job, though! Keep working on your craft!
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To be honest, the recording quality makes it a little hard to listen to. However, I do think you sound very natural in your performance. You are speaking as if telling someone in person and the words you hit were very fitting and not overdone. Aside from the recording quality, I think the only thing you need to work on is your tempo. This is a narration script and you shouldn’t speak too fast. The point of narration is to explain, not sell, so make sure the words are spoken at a reasonable pace.
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Congratulations, both reads could work for this script. You’ve got great talent if you can pull off more than one type of tone. However, I would say that your reads sound more like narration scripts. I am not getting the impression that you are selling something to me. It sounds more like you’re trying to explain something to your employees… Either way, well done.
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I like both reads. different perspective on each. As Sue mentioned the first one sounded light with personality. The Second read sounded like a defensive personality like “I’m preparing for battle!” LOL! both were really good! Keep it up!
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Hey GretaJ! I liked both reads, the first was light and friendly. In the second read, it felt a little more aggressive. Great voice!
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Hi Suecat, I agree with nettipo1 about the audio quality. A piece of advice that my coach gave me is that when you’re recording you want to keep your voice between -12 and -6 decibels. If you’re using a software like audacity then you can visually see the volume you’re speaking at and try to maintain that throughout your read. I hope that helps, it definitely helped me.
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Hi suecat, the audio quality needs to be better (volume, clarity), because it made it difficult to hear your voice clearly. I think you have a smooth and even delivery, which is good. You might want to strengthen the emotions you are choosing to use in this read–and I say emotions because the story has a turning point in it, where there is a problem (a whole list of things that weren’t in abundance) to a solution (luckily, kids were), so there could be two emotions on either side of that turning point. So perhaps focus on bringing out the emotions behind the words more. Would love to hear you to do this one again and see what you can do with it.
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Hello All,
I’m a new student here at Edge Studio and my homework was to toy around with audacity and submit a recording of the Hemingway script from the Edge Studio script library. I would appreciate any and all feedback on both my read and my use of audacity.-
Your read is well done overall, good tempo, well placed inflections, and you sounded quite conversational. Only problem I can find is that you don’t sound particularly interested in what your reading. If you want people to enjoy what your explaining in your narration script, you need to convince them that you find it interesting too. Also, your inflections at the end of the sentences aren’t natural, try speaking them like statements, that’ll help.
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This is very good -hard to believe you are a new student! I agree with suecat that you have a soothing voice, and I don’t notice any unnecessary pauses, so it flows into the listener’s ear very smoothly. I noticed that you sort of end with the same inflection point or same level at the end of a sentence or at comma, which might make it more monotone than you’d want, so you might want to break from that pattern a bit. Perhaps see how the phrases are more like thoughts, and combine those thoughts as one scene. Or perhaps visualize that you are saying these words to someone beside you. Overall though, this is a great first posting, so keep posting more!
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Hey all – finally getting back on track for my Commercial demo reel after a long hiatus. Any feedback on these practice reads greatly appreciated!
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You have a great voice for commercials, I’d say you’re on the right track as far as tone, tempo, and pitch. You could speak a little louder and I felt that each recording sounded similar. If you want to keep clients listening, it’d really help to ensure that the reads are unique to each other. Hope this helps.
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You have a great voice! On the Nutra System and Invisaline tempo could have been a little slower. Remembering what my Coach said, that the product/company name needs to be heard because they write the check. The Animal read started nice and methodical, then it picked up a bit. Still enjoyable reads.
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