Feedback Forum

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  • #15468
    David Goldberg
    Edge Studio Staff

    Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!

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  • #68879
    rogue1
    Participant

    Hello, Forum Folks. A new read for Pure Leaf Iced Tea (very appropriate due the sweltering summer weather!) Appreciate all feedback–thank you for taking the time to listen!

    PURE LEAF

    At Pure Leaf, real tea leaves meet real brewing expertise. We blend the finest tea leaves and brew them at a lower temperature for smooth, delicious, real brewed iced tea. Pure Leaf, our thing is tea.

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    • #68899
      hharris
      Participant

      Hi rogue1 – your voice is well suited for this type of ad. Calming, soothing, and rich. It sounds spot on from the intro, but I do agree that the shift on the descriptive words does break up the tempo a bit. Maybe play around on which descriptive words to focus on – one or two each read. Your voice and tone are so well done, I think a read with few inflections would still work well. Thanks for sharing!

      • #68905
        rogue1
        Participant

        Thank you for the insightful feedback, hharris. Will definitely work on my tempo and inflections, as well as experimenting more with what descriptors I choose to emphasize in my read. Appreciate your having a listen!

    • #68893
      suecat
      Participant

      Hey Rogue, You sound like a natural. Your voice is smooth and conversational. Once again, you knocked it out the park! Great performance!

      • #68906
        rogue1
        Participant

        You’re far too kind, suecat. Appreciate the encouragement and your taking the time to listen!

    • #68889
      Isaac M.
      Participant

      This was spot-on, the delivery and technique coming off as effortless and professional. You might want to tone it down a bit, but just a bit, on words like “expertise” and “finest”. And while I really like the acting at “smooth, delicious, real brewed,” slowing down the tempo that much feels a little forced as it sort of breaks the flow you’d skillfully developed until then. Overall, I’d say the tone, fluctuations in pitch, and quality of both the voice and the recording are on point.

      • #68907
        rogue1
        Participant

        Thank you for the encouraging feedback, Isaac. I definitely hear that change in tempo you and hharris mention when I start “romancing” the quality of the tea. Will look to make that rhythm flow more more naturally in future. Thanks again for weighing in!

  • #68862
    Mike
    Participant

    Hi! I’m Mike and I was told to upload my homework here for feedback. I hope you can spare the time to listen and give me notes. Thanks.

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    • #68960
      TimDKietzman
      Participant

      Well Mike, I can honestly say you’re on the right track. Each of your takes sounds different and your tone of sounding embarressed, aggravated, or defensive remains consistent in each of them. Although, I think you should work on making your voice sound more natural. You sound more like an announcer to a crowd and voice acting is meant to be conversational. You may be trying too hard to make them sound different. Also, you pause midsentence. Be sure save pauses for commas, periods, or other full stops. I hope this helps.

    • #68883
      rogue1
      Participant

      Hi, Mike. Great exercise! You definitely emphasized the words in such a way that the tone and emotion subtly change each time in your delivery. Keep up the great work!

    • #68865
      nettipo1
      Participant

      Hello! It’s interesting how it does change the emotion slightly when you emphasize a different word. Around when you emphasized “stole” or “my,” I could hear a slight change from maybe a frustrated emotion in the beginning, to a lighter almost playful tone.

  • #68859
    Isaac M.
    Participant

    Trying out some more narrative pieces here, this one with a more storytelling edge to it. Looking to get some feedback on it.

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    • #68962
      TimDKietzman
      Participant

      You brought the script to life so well, I would agree though that it sounds more like an audiobook than a movie narration. An audiobook generally sounds the same from beginning to end with a consistent pace, but a narration like this I think would have more feeling for each moment it’s describing. I hope that helps.

    • #68897
      nettipo1
      Participant

      Hi Isaac, I think whether this is an audiobook or movie narration, the narrator still needs to help paint the characters and the story for the listener by giving descriptive words more color, and bringing out the moments–and when the moments change–in the story. Words such as spoiled, selfish and unkind, and shining castle, could be knit together and given some flavor so that the listener will connect those together and quickly get an idea of who the prince is. Same thing with the woman; I think words like “beggar” or “haggard” could be colored in more to show the contrast between her and the prince. Then, for those moments when she turns into an enchantress, and when she turns him into a beast – these are definitely changes in the story that could be brought out more..I’m not sure how, but maybe a slight pause after something happens, or a change in inflection on “enchantress” or “beast” because for the first-time listener, these are unexpected things. Sorry if I’m going on too long in what I’m saying…Your voice has a really nice tone and clarity that is nice to listen to, and it has a nice amount of gravitas in it, so all that I’m saying here may amount to just a couple of additional choices you could make on what to play up on.

      • #68904
        Isaac M.
        Participant

        Thanks a lot the feedback!

    • #68886
      rogue1
      Participant

      Hi, Isaac. Your slate says movie, but I have to say I found your read to be a solid audiobook narration (I could hear the Menken score playing in my head while I was listening). Well done keeping the energy flowing and holding the listeners’ attention through such a long script.

      • #68887
        Isaac M.
        Participant

        I appreciate the feedback. Yeah the script is called movie narration, so I guess I’ll need feedback from my coach (but you’re welcome to provide any insight) on how to distinguish between audiobook reading and a movie narration.

  • #68856
    Isaac M.
    Participant

    Here are two versions of the same copy. Which one do you think works better? And how would you describe the tone in each version?

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    • #68901
      hharris
      Participant

      Hi Isaac,
      The tone of the first read felt more precise and assertive like you’re guiding a paced-out presentation. Whereas the second read has more of a personal quality for me. It feels like you’re guiding a story in my mind – the tone is more serene and there’s a slight touch of awe. Makes me interested in the story to come. Both reads sound solid though…Thanks for sharing!

      • #68903
        Isaac M.
        Participant

        Thanks for the feedback!

    • #68884
      rogue1
      Participant

      Hi, Isaac. Great job on two distinct interpretations of the same script! I must say I find your second read the most appealing of the two. While both reads are very crisp and clear, your second one has a more natural, flowing quality which is very inviting to the ear. Your first read, though perhaps more authoritative in tone, has a bit of a halting, staccato quality that doesn’t sound quite as pleasing. Really well done! Keep up the great work!

      • #68888
        Isaac M.
        Participant

        very helpful feedback thanks

  • #68843
    Jayburglar
    Participant

    Starting work on my narration demo. Here’s 3 spots I did for homework with my coach. I’d appreciate any feedback!

    APOLLO 16:
    The year was 1967, and the astronauts of Apollo 16 were going to the moon. This is Charlie Duke, Lunar Module Pilot on Apollo 16. This amazing little capsule went by the call-sign CASPER, and it was the heart of an immense system of rocket engineering that got the astronauts safely to the moon and back.

    CONGAREE NATIONAL PARK:
    IT IS A PLACE OF CONSTANT CHANGE. OF WOOD AND WATER, SUNLIGHT AND SHADE. THIS IS CONGAREE NATIONAL PARK.

    NOT FAR FROM SOUTH CAROLINA’S STATE CAPITOL, THIS MAJESTIC WILDERNESS OF TOWERING TREES IS A SANCTUARY. FOR WILDLIFE… FOR CHAMPION TREES… FOR VISITORS FROM AROUND THE WORLD.

    DAY BY DAY, SEASON BY SEASON, THIS FLOODPLAIN FOREST CHANGES–SHAPED AND RESHAPED BY WATER. A NEW PLACE TO EXPLORE…EACH TIME YOU RETURN..

    YELLOWSTONE:
    In the northern part of the park, large stretches of grass and sagebrush spread across the mountains and valleys. Similar to the prairies, this habitat provides an excellent home to the badger and her new family. They see light, for perhaps the first time. A strange new world for them. And they stay close to their mother at first. But growing bolder, they begin to explore on their own.

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    • #68890
      rogue1
      Participant

      Hello, Jay. Wow. Beautiful voice, amazing range, and very accomplished reads. (You’re hired! 🙂) My only suggestion is to perhaps soften the emotional tone on your read for Congaree National Park–infuse a bit more of a “sense of wonder” about the majestic beauty and ever-changing topography you’re describing. Seems a more natural fit (no pun intended).

    • #68876
      taylorn.quinn
      Participant

      Hi,
      I love your voice and how different you can make it sound. I only have two things that stuck out to me that you might want to check out: the first is the Apollo one sounded really loud I am talking my headphones even were pulsating. Maybe check your DAW and other systems and also see where you were in regards to the mic. The other one was a general one and that is to watch your vocal fry. While it worked for the last two, it still sometimes sounded like you were possibly losing your voice at times or running out of air.
      Other than that keep up the great work!

    • #68854
      Isaac M.
      Participant

      You’ve got an awesome voice and the quality of the recording sounds great. The execution is also captivating.

      My main critique would be that, especially in the first two (Apollo/Congaree), there are parts that sound overdone. I’d tone down the performative aspect of it because the pieces start to sound like a commercial. So if this is for a trailer, then great, if it’s more of a documentary-type of thing, I’d make it a bit more neutral without all the (very impressive) fluctuations in tone, pitch, etc.

    • #68853
      suecat
      Participant

      Hey Jay- Your deep, smooth voice, is a good fit for narration. Your performance was captivating. I’m from SC, listening to you, made me want to visit Congaree Nat’l Park – AGAIN! Keep it up!

  • #68828
    rogue1
    Participant

    Happy Monday! Continuing my series of “then and now” with an early record paired with a current one. All comments are welcome—-including performance and technical. Many thanks for taking the time to listen!

    FRONTLINE PLUS:

    Today is gonna be the best day ever. Since my human got me Frontline Plus, we’re running more trails, sniffing more tails, and finding all new places to splash in the mud. Just a little Frontline Plus on my back kills ticks and fleas for a whole 30 days. Because there’s nothing better than getting out and feeling the wind in your fur. Vet-recommended Frontline Plus. Live Off The Leash!

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    • #68891
      Isaac M.
      Participant

      I like the first take in track one the most. It’s got the best balance of sounding natural with well timed pauses, changes in tone, pitch, and tempo, the words properly hit. The other two takes have great moments, but they also have some out-of-place pauses or abrupt shifts in tone or pitch. The take on the second track sounds like it might be more professional, but maybe after hearing it after the first track, I’m inclined to think that it sounds more controlled and carefully practiced, yet less natural. the way you acted out the “getting out there and…wind in your fur” is lots of fun, though, works because you’re portraying a dog haha

      • #68908
        rogue1
        Participant

        Thank you for your insightful feedback, Isaac! I find this script a bit challenging on where to land on the performance (not unlike a dog unsure of where to dart next in an open yard—-maybe I’m “method acting” 🙂). Perhaps finding a happy balance between the reads is just what the veterinarian ordered. Appreciate your taking the time to weigh in!

    • #68864
      nettipo1
      Participant

      Hello! I think I like the “now” version more than the “then” version, mainly because you gave yourself freedom to play with tempo and emphasizing different things in the second read. I can tell you were trying to capture the essence of being a dog or pet talking, so continue playing with it to see if you can bring out the excited emotion with different deliveries and pacing. I did notice that you emphasized “best day ever” and “a whole 30 days” the same in both, so try to be mindful of any patterns and break out of them by doing something different. Overall I did notice a difference between the two reads, so kudos on that!

      • #68875
        rogue1
        Participant

        Appreciate your insightful feedback, nettipo1! I have to admit that “spastic dog” is not an easy characterization to capture! 🙂 Thank you for recognizing my attempts to modulate my delivery and play with the tempo and pacing of the script. I’m notorious for repeating the same patterns in my reads and will strive to bust out of that bad habit. Thanks again for taking the time to listen!

  • #68797
    Official81
    Participant

    Hello VO friends I hope all of our father’s enjoyed their day yesterday! Please let me know how my audio sounds and the voice work as well. I added music but really want to know how I did. This was my homework assignment.

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    • #68963
      TimDKietzman
      Participant

      That was AMAZING. You have a beautiful and approachable voice for an e-learning script such as this. I think you may have been overemphasizing words though and the ending sounded cut off, as if you just abruptly ended the recording.

    • #68855
      Isaac M.
      Participant

      Phenomenal performance/technique and recording/production quality. Was this for an actual spot? I agree with the other commentator, the one part that doesn’t sound as convincing is the “ask your representative” because of how you draw out the word representative.

    • #68833
      rogue1
      Participant

      Hello, Official81! You have such a warm, inviting quality to your voice! I agree with nettipo1 in that you might want to dial down the music levels as it competes with your read (great choice of track, BTW). I would also hit your ending statement: ”…or as your representative” a bit more decisively rather than gently trailing off as you do now. Keep up the great work!

      • #68847
        Official81
        Participant

        Thank you very much for the feedback I am noting this for my next practice reads!

    • #68826
      nettipo1
      Participant

      Hi Official 81! I liked it. Maybe lower the music level a little bit more so that we can hear and enjoy your nice voice more. I think the only word I would change the delivery on would be “representative,” because it maybe sounded a bit more alluring than the other parts of the read before it. But all in all, it was very pleasant to listen to!

      • #68848
        Official81
        Participant

        Hello Nettipo1! Thank you very much for the feedback it is greatly appreciated and most certainly noted for smoother reads.

  • #68790
    CatgirlMSU
    Participant

    Let’s try this again. I hope the files upload properly this time. Please disregard my previous post.

    Hey, everyone! Here are three recordings for my narration homework. I recorded these on my iPad so I just need feedback on my reading since the audio isn’t as flawless as studio quality. I’m a bit nervous about submitting my first homework recordings. As a side note, my southern accent shows through some, but I’m working on making it sound more neutral as part of my coaching sessions. Thank you for any feedback!

    Documentary on Jazz
    It is America’s music. It is an improvised Art, making itself up as it goes along. It rewards individual expression. But demands selfless collaboration. It is forever changing. But nearly always rooted in the blues. It has a rich tradition and its own rules. But it is brand new every night.

    About Horror
    Take a trip back to a time when late night creature features were all the rage and the personalities that presented them were just as popular as the movies. Beginning in the 1950s, the horror fest was a staple of regional television. From ghouls to vampires – to werewolves and crypt keepers – every host had a persona to suit their unique personalities.

    A Haunting Tale
    In this world, there is real evil.
    In the darkest shadows and in the most ordinary places.
    These are the true stories of the innocent and the unimaginable.
    Between the world we see and the things we fear.
    There are doors.

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    • #68964
      TimDKietzman
      Participant

      I think your voice is fantastic for a narration demo and I am pleased with the words you hit. Each recording however sounds almost exactly the same and I think your tone could use a little more variety in each recording. Finally I think the tempo you’re using is too fast for narration. Remember it’s about explaining to the listener and you need to ensure they can hear and understand your instructions.

    • #68835
      rogue1
      Participant

      Welcome to the Edge Studio Forum, CatgirlMUS! As a Virginia boy, I delight in your hint of southern lilt and find it adds a nice warmth to your read (though I understand also wanting to add a more neutral sound in your repertoire). As your delivery is already wonderfully crisp and clear, I would recommend relaxing a bit and considering a more conversational approach–like you’re discussing Jazz or horror one-on-one with a friend and not reading from a script. This is something I work on all the time, and it really helps to picture who you are addressing so the read is more natural and emotional. Keep up the great work!

      • #68921
        CatgirlMSU
        Participant

        Thanks! I’m still working on neutralizing my accent a little more, but it helps that my coach says southern accents are good in voice over. I mentioned in my reply to nettipo1 that my degree is in broadcast communication with some career experience behind scenes in tv news and radio. I’m working on unlearning some of that broadcaster voice to sound more conversational. Your suggestions are a big help!

    • #68827
      nettipo1
      Participant

      Hi CatGirlMSU – Congrats on your first posting! I agree with Official81 on the pauses (I still do this) and making it sound more conversational (I’m still practicing this as well). One way that might help make it less like reading is to think of what images might be shown on a television screen, and remember your narration should support those images. For the Horror and the Haunting Tale, perhaps think of yourself telling a scary story around a campfire. The Southern accent was slightly there, but I can’t imagine that being a deterrent for listeners.

      • #68920
        CatgirlMSU
        Participant

        Thanks! I’m still working on a more neutral accent, but my coach says southern accents are also good in voiceovers. I like your suggestions about thinking of certain imagery. My degree is in broadcast communication with some career experience behind scenes in tv news and radio, so I’ve been used to broadcaster voice. Now I’m unlearning a little bit of that to sound more conversational in VO. Everyone’s suggestions here on the forum are a big help!

    • #68810
      Official81
      Participant

      Hello CatGirl! Love the name… I love your voice its very crisp and clear. You may want to apply some sound deafening to your space so that your room doesn’t sound open. And I also hear lots of pauses in your reads typically at punctuation. Try sounding more conversational. Read the script and try reading it like you are talking to a really good friend. That helped me out tremendously when I first started. Great Luck you sound great otherwise.

      • #68922
        CatgirlMSU
        Participant

        Thanks! I’m a cat person and graduated from Mississippi State University. I’m still getting my recording equipment set up, so these were recorded on my iPad just for homework purposes. My microphone was on back order and finally got here last week, so now I can work on putting all that together. Thanks for the advice on pauses. Some times I overthink pauses a bit so they end up a little short. Thanks for the advice on sounding more conversational. My background is a broadcast communication degree and some career experience behind scenes in tv news and radio, so I’m working on making my broadcasting training sound more conversational in my VO reads.

  • #68788
    CatgirlMSU
    Participant

    Edited to add that it said the files were empty on upload. I’m working to fix that now.

    Hey, everyone! Here are three recordings for my narration homework. I recorded these on my iPad so I just need feedback on my reading since the audio isn’t as flawless as studio quality. I’m a bit nervous about submitting my first homework recordings. As a side note, my southern accent shows through some, but I’m working on making it sound more neutral as part of my coaching sessions. Thank you for any feedback!

    Documentary on Jazz
    It is America’s music. It is an improvised Art, making itself up as it goes along. It rewards individual expression. But demands selfless collaboration. It is forever changing. But nearly always rooted in the blues. It has a rich tradition and its own rules. But it is brand new every night.

    About Horror
    Take a trip back to a time when late night creature features were all the rage and the personalities that presented them were just as popular as the movies. Beginning in the 1950s, the horror fest was a staple of regional television. From ghouls to vampires – to werewolves and crypt keepers – every host had a persona to suit their unique personalities.

    A Haunting Tale
    In this world, there is real evil.
    In the darkest shadows and in the most ordinary places.
    These are the true stories of the innocent and the unimaginable.
    Between the world we see and the things we fear.
    There are doors.

    • This reply was modified 3 years, 6 months ago by CatgirlMSU.
  • #68786
    d_tonguet
    Participant

    Hey, Looking for some feedback on this commercial read. I know the last half second got cut off. I’m still working on those editing skills.

    Burt’s Bee’s
    You ask me to define myself? What should I say? I’m complicated. I am complex. I’m a boss. And beautiful. I’m all these things and a million things more. But one thing I am not? I am not synthetic. So why would I use beauty products that are? Introducing new Burt’s Bees Beauty. A full line of natural cosmetics that make you feel your beautiful best because of how they’re made, not in spite of it. Burt’s Bees.

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    • #68836
      rogue1
      Participant

      Great work, d_tonguet! You have really lovely quality to your voice and your read is very inviting and genuine (with just a necessary dollop of sass). Feel I might be hearing a bit of a sibilant s on “Bert’s Bees” (something I have to work on myself), but otherwise an accomplished read. Keep up the amazing work!

    • #68811
      Official81
      Participant

      Hey d_tonguet! You sound awesome girl the only thing I would do is go in and take out the pauses so that it sounds really conversational and maybe do the read just a tad bit faster. Your on fire girl!

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