Feedback Forum
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August 7, 2020 at 9:27 am #15468
David Goldberg
Edge Studio StaffHi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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This topic was modified 4 years, 10 months ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 years, 7 months ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 7 months ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 7 months ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 7 months ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 7 months ago by
David Goldberg.
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This topic was modified 4 years, 10 months ago by
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October 18, 2021 at 1:18 am #71420
Shaun Cruz
ParticipantHey All! This is my first submission, part of my assignment for the 1st private coaching session I had last year. I’ve been busy with other things but finally rolling back in! Anyway, any feedback is much appreciated.
Thanks! Please Find Scripts Below
AMEX:
Do you know me? Probably not. In my business, recognition is always important, but when I’m buying goods online I prefer a little privacy. With Private Payments from American Express, I get the security of a unique number created for each business transaction I make. Because my private information is my business, and American Express keeps it that way.JACK DANIELS:
In Lynchburg, Tennessee, you can park in the middle of the road to talk with a neighbor about taxes or the weather. You can pick enough wild blackberries to fill a tin bucket. And you can see a distillery where Jack Daniel made whiskey way back in 1866. We still make it in a slow, deliberate fashion, much as he did. One sip, and you’ll be glad to know we don’t ever plan to stop. Jack Daniel’s … smooth sippin’ Tennessee whiskey.SESAME PLACE:
Sesame Place is the theme park where Sesame Street comes to life! New in 2018 is our biggest, most exciting roller coaster ever – Oscar’s Wacky Taxi™! Bring the entire family to whirl on rides, splash down slides and hug everyone’s favorite furry friends. So before little kids become big kids, bring them to meet their Sesame Street friends at Sesame Place® theme park!
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October 29, 2021 at 6:00 pm #71682
RoxyMel
ParticipantHi Shaun Cruz, great ability to alter and vary you voice pitch! The second and third reads seemed well in tempo and smoothness, though I felt that in the first read for Amex it was a little rushed especially about two thirds of the way though it. Overall wonderful work especially considering this is your first submission!
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October 18, 2021 at 11:39 pm #71454
mkell755
ParticipantHi Shaun, good work! I like the variation in tone, pace and delivery between the 3 scripts, way to vary it up. I’m only hearing sound in my left ear for all three, could be my setup but usually I hear equally in both ears through my earphones, might be something to check (although I don’t know how one would fix this).
Amex: Pace and tone were good.
Jack: Nice accent, slower pace and chill vibe, this was my favorite for you! “taxes” sounded like “Texas” to me, but I think you did a good job of getting into the accent, and it could be argued that your pronunciation kept in character.
Sesame: Good energy and enthusiasm for this one. You might try some variation in tone for the list of 3 things that starts with “…whirl on rides,”. Also, I know this is just for practice, but the word “biggest was missed in this script, just something to watch for that every word is said. Overall very good!Mary
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October 20, 2021 at 11:36 pm #71492
Shaun Cruz
ParticipantHi Mary! Thanks so much for the feedback, I got the whole one-sided recording thing fixed, I will be uploading more samples soon! Thanks again!
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October 18, 2021 at 2:27 pm #71430
Logan DFD
ParticipantOverall, these are pretty good! I liked the Jack Daniels one the best, but the Sesame Place one was great too! You did a good job pulling off both a deep, country voice, and a higher, child-friendly tone. Something you might want to think about is adding a little more variation in pitch and emphasis, and when deciding when to vary the pitch and emphasis, go with your gut, listen to the recording, and make any necessary changes to your delivery until you think it sounds natural and conversational (as if you could see yourself saying it in a conversation). Keep up the good work!
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October 20, 2021 at 11:38 pm #71493
Shaun Cruz
ParticipantHi Logan, Thanks so much for the great feedback! and thank you for the tips, being conversational in a lot of the laidback stuff is my goal so, I’m definitely taking your advice into consideration. Thanks again, Peace!
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October 17, 2021 at 11:26 pm #71415
ColtonJLong
ParticipantHey guys!
Got a couple new homework assignment scripts, and some retakes as part of the same assignment!
Rip into them, Im really trying to go h*****n improving!
Thanks!AARP
It’s right in your own backyard.
While it may be hard to believe, roughly five million Americans don’t even know where their next meal will come from.
In communities just like yours, there are many who need help.
Join people across the country who are coming together with AARP Create the Good, to end hunger.
Start today. It can be as easy as giving food or money to your local area food bank, or getting tips to start your own food drive.
Whatever level of involvement is right for you, we’ve made it simple to find and help people in your area.
So get involved. Go to http://www.createthegood.org/hunger.Red Cross Blanket
You don’t think much about it
You never dwell on how it was made
It’s just a blanket after all
But when everything else has been lost
The comfort it provides.. is immeasurable
The American Red Cross brings hope and help to people in need
Every eight minutes every day
So this season, give something that means something
Support us at redcross.org.Cleaner Elections
Smear campaigns…mud slinging…twisting the truth.
Why do politicians resort to such underhanded tactics?
Do they think it really helps their campaign?
It’s u**y, uncalled for, and deceitful.
So why do we allow them to continue?
It’s time to level the playing field.
You want our vote? Then focus on the issues that affect all of us.
This election season, advocate for a clean election process.
Paid for by the committee for cleaner elections.History Channel
If you lived before our time, who would you be?
Would you fight your brother for the rights of another? Who would you be?
Would you find new dreams or create wonders?
What if you could choose from a 1,000 yesterdays; a 1,000 lives, when the past was today and the new took your breath away.
Who would you be? What would you feel? How would you live? Who would you love?
Remembering every generation before us;
Remembering for generations to come.
The History Channel. Where the past comes alive.Attachments:
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October 17, 2021 at 2:49 pm #71406
John Trape
ParticipantHi everyone,
I am attaching three narration recordings, supported by the scripts below, and would very much welcome any and all feedback.
Kind regards,
John
1. Beethoven
Of all the hundreds of symphonies that have been composed, none can rival in popularity or emotional interest the nine great symphonic works that Beethoven wrote. Beethoven took music off the pedestal of formal beauty, where Haydn and Mozart had left it, and immersed it in the whirlpool of life. He roughened it up until it began to do what he expected it to do … to express problems, evoke emotions, move and struggle exuberantly. More people can respond at once to a Beethoven symphony than to any other. Many have written fine symphonies, but Beethoven’s remain in a class by themselves, as invaluable a part of our heritage as are Shakespeare’s plays.2. 2012 Extinction
The Maya, an ancient South American culture, predicted that time would end
in a violent apocalypse on December 21, 2012. They created an elaborate
astronomical calendar called “The Long Count,” which stops abruptly in
2012. This date, which is also the winter equinox, coincides with an
incredibly rare galactic alignment that happens once every 26,000 years.
What did the Mayans think would happen when their calendar ended? And,
were they joined by other cultures–from different parts of the world and in
different centuries–all pointing to 2012 as a calamitous end time? The Hopi
Indians and Eastern Hindu share similar calendars, which are remarkably
synchronous. One counter-culture mystic even uses an Ancient Chinese
philosophy to unlock the key to a 2012 prophecy. Nostradamus himself
suggests the world is headed toward a coming cataclysm. What can we do to
heed the warning of the Mayan apocalypse?3. This….is my voice.
There is no music, and there are no sound effects…only the pure, clear sound, recorded for your ears.
I am a voice over artist, a voice actor, a voice talent, and I can convey my message in many ways, in many tones and with many emotions.
I can speak in a very light whisper, to share an intimate message with you. Or my voice can boom deeply, demanding respect from those who are listening. My voice can express sympathy to someone who has just experienced a great loss, or it can reflect the happiness one feels after having accomplished something great!
I sit (or stand) before this tube constructed of metals, of plastics, of wire and of silicon, which listens patiently to me, as if it were alive like a mistress, hour after hour, day after day and night after night. It never judges me, however it is a reflection of me….one which is neither vengeful, nor forgiving.
I am a voice actor…..and this is my voice.Attachments:
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October 18, 2021 at 11:52 pm #71456
mkell755
ParticipantHi John, these are all GREAT! Really good pacing, flow and enunciation for all of them. Your voice is really nice, clear and deep and is very pleasant to hear. My favorite of these three was Beethoven – you really took your time to tell the story and I wanted to hear more! The only comment I would have on the Mayan script is the pronunciation of “2012”. I wonder if it should be said “twenty-twelve” or “two-thousand and twelve” as you did. You stayed consistent throughout, so it’s just more of a question on my end in general. I have very little criticism for you, only that this is really good stuff and I want to hear an audiobook soon!!! I’ve been listening to you these last few months and you really sound polished. Very good!
Mary
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October 21, 2021 at 7:51 am #71500
John Trape
ParticipantHi Mary,
Thank you very much for your support. I apologise for this late response. Yes, your comment on dates was spot on – my coach made the same point. Thank you again!
John
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October 17, 2021 at 2:35 pm #71403
ecbrown220
ParticipantIf possible please offer some feedback and be brutally honest and critical.
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October 18, 2021 at 2:35 pm #71431
Logan DFD
ParticipantYou have a nice, deep voice, which fits perfectly with the script you read. I think you should add more variation to your pitch, and try to relax when reading your script. Also, the recording skipped in one or two places, so you might want to look into that. Good work!
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October 14, 2021 at 2:54 am #71363
Lex Herber
ParticipantHello,
I have recently recorded my first character demos (gaming & animation).
They were to recorded in my home studio while being live directed by a pro in London, who then mixed, mastered & sent them back.
I would love to know the feelings of the international community here.
Please also, feel free to check out my website which I managed to build solo, with negative web design skills!
http://www.lexherbervoiceover.comThank you 🙏
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October 13, 2021 at 11:29 pm #71358
brucem
ParticipantHi everyone,
I have some scripts that I’m working on for a narration demo; please take a listen when you get a chance. Any and all feedback welcome!
Thanks
BruceAttachments:
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October 17, 2021 at 2:40 pm #71405
ecbrown220
ParticipantHi Bruce,
I listened to your SamCookBio file. It sounded awesome my only critique would be on your sentences the ended with a “s”. Be careful to not drag the “s” too much at then end of your sentence. Otherwise it was great.
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October 12, 2021 at 10:25 pm #71326
Leann
ParticipantHello there! I am uploading all of these in preparation for my upcoming session and hope maybe someone may have some time to give a little feedback? 🙂 I look forward to hearing any tips or tricks. I seem to be having a hard time with cutting and pasting using Audacity and finding the right levels. Give it to me straight here, folks! I can take it. 😉
Thanks <3Attachments:
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October 13, 2021 at 9:42 pm #71352
nettipo1
ParticipantHi Leann,
All of your reads were very clear. An overall suggestion I would offer is to relax more, as you sounded kind of careful, particularly in the VOCorp-trainer read, and also try different ways to make it more conversational. Sometime it helps to ad lib a fake conversation with another (imaginary) person, and then roll right into the script, and see if it helps you continue with that conversational tone. I can relate to the Audacity challenges – I found that the DAW/Audacity class that they offer will give you the key settings to aim for. Good job! -
October 13, 2021 at 3:28 pm #71344
Oktober10
ParticipantHi Leann, I really love the tone of your voice. You annunciate well and have a clear voice. I like the expression in your voice as all. Friendly, authoritative and believable. nice work!
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October 12, 2021 at 10:26 pm #71331
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October 12, 2021 at 1:48 am #71316
nettipo1
ParticipantHi All,
I find that sometimes I don’t know what exactly I’m trying to do in my practice sessions. Probably doesn’t help for me to practice too many times in one sitting. Anyway, here are two different types of reads. Arm and Hammer is meant to be light and humorous, and PPG Paints (practice#2) is supposed to be more “real”–although I personally think it sounds rather gloomy. I’ve also included PPG paint practice#1 for comparison. I am open to any thoughts, suggestions, opinions on which version you like more. Thank you.
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October 11, 2021 at 11:58 pm #71311
mkell755
ParticipantHi all! I’m looking for some feedback to this script for my upcoming narration demo. Please let me know what you think. I’m trying for friendly / conversational. Thanks!
Mary
Henri Cartier-Bresson was a French humanist photographer born in 1908. He is considered a master of candid photography, viewing the craft as an avenue to capture a decisive moment. He was one of the earliest photographers to use 35mm film and shot almost exclusively in black and white. Though his large body of work, which included a variety of street photography, was impressive, he turned his attention solely to painting later in life.
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This reply was modified 3 years, 8 months ago by
mkell755. Reason: Type on description of script
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October 15, 2021 at 5:58 pm #71393
Evette75
ParticipantHi Mary, I agree with Oktober10 – that moment when you fold the pamphelt and start paying attention to the audio. I can see what nettipo1 mentioned about changing tone to give more attention to his changing paths. Overall, great job!
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October 13, 2021 at 9:58 pm #71353
nettipo1
ParticipantHello,
Your delivery is friendly, smooth, and soothing, and you have no issues with reading or doing any unnecessary pausing, which is wonderful. I still tend to think that you could be more conversational. Be mindful of the down inflection at the end of his name “Bresson.”, which ends up slightly halting the sentence mid-way. Also, the last sentence contains a bit of interesting information (changing to painting later on in life), which you might want to call to the listener’s attention by changing your tone or inflection so that it’s “audibly” different from the preceding sentences. -
October 13, 2021 at 3:37 pm #71347
Oktober10
ParticipantAWESOME! I imagined myself in a museum with the audio learning about the work. Great pace and tone and very informative speak.
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October 11, 2021 at 10:50 pm #71306
Sheila Harris
ParticipantHi! Here are two of my latest scripts. Looking forward to your feedback!
Official Alaska Vacation Planning Video
This Official Alaska Vacation Planning Video is filled with plenty of breathtaking scenes. But more important, it’s loaded with all the information you need for planning a trip to Alaska. Like when to go, what to wear, and what to see. So if you’ve got Alaska on your mind, you’re going to love this video. Let’s begin with snow sports. This is definitely the place. For cross-country and down-hill skiing. For snow boarding, tobogganing, and even ice fishing.
Advance Technologies
Welcome to advance technology incorporated and to the excitement and challenges of a growing business. As a new employee, your job is important to us. Your success is an important factor in the success of this company. This software is designed to offer you accurate information about company policies and procedures, benefit packages, performance reviews, training and education opportunities.
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