Feedback Forum
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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Hi everyone! Here is a script for feedback. I’m working towards recording my narration demo. Let me know what you think. Thanks!
Mary
Mini Supermarket
This may look like the front of a vending machine. In fact, to make a purchase, all you do is dial a code and a robot sales clerk does the rest.
Instead of just sodas or crackers, this machine offers more than five hundred items – like p***y hose, shampoos, lotions, pacifiers, tooth paste, batteries – even dog food.-
Great voice! Good read. I would say the intonation on that last “dog food” might sound better going up rather than down.
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Hi everyone.
This is my first homework assignment to record a commercial and upload it on the forum. I would love to get some feedback from some of my fellow actors/ actresses. Thanks in advance. -
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Woodies
I hate Woodies! I’m the only dog on the block who doesn’t get any love, and I tell ya, I’m fed up! It’s just Woodies, Woodies, Woodies … every doggone day. She never has time for me anymore. When I want to romp in the park — “Sorry, darling. Mummy has to go to Woodies to buy a new dress.” When I want to play fetch the stick — “Not now, Canine Cutey, WOODIES is having a sale on shoes.” I thought it was supposed to be a dog’s world out there. If only I were a cat! (Meow SFX) -
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hey so critiquing is a part of my homework so I will just say the american airlines sounds a little robotic toward the end
and the fish boil can slow down a bit so I have time to feel the buttery flavors I am going to be tasting when its all done and ready to eat
otherwise good read -
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Hello beautiful people,
Here are couple more rehearsals for my upcoming narration demo record. Your feedback is appreciated.
GROW AN AVOCADO
Who doesn’t love fresh guacamole or creamy avocado toast? But after you’ve prepared these avocado dishes, what can you do with that big pit in the center? Why not use it to grow your own avocado tree? It’s an attractive and almost care-free houseplant, and if you live in the right climate it can produce delicious fruit that you can eat!CHROMIUM LI-SAF LASER
Chromium-doped lithium strontium aluminum fluoride or Cr:LiSAF, is a laser media suitable for tunable applications from 780 to 1000nm. With ultra low losses and absorption strength, TeraWatt power, and femtosecond pulses, a Cr:LiSAF laser has an enormous range of uses. -
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Hello everyone. So I recorded these horror narrations for my projects. I would appreciate it if you can give feedback on my performance. I recorded three different styles because I’m a little confused on how to approach narration. If there is anything I am doing wrong, feel free to point out.
(Sorry about commenting twice. I made a mistake on uploading.)
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The background sound effects are fine.
And your voice is good.
But Haley is right, the reading was a bit flat. You need to act, and I mean not “forced” acting, but acting like an actor acts. I only listened to composition, and for instance right at the beginning, you need to say the world stood still for the first time like the WHOLE WORLD man, stood still. Your Freshman year determines the rest of your High School life, and if you s***w it up, you are s*****d. And you might be s*****d. ohmygawd.
But you’ve got the technical aspects nailed, and as I said, you’ve got a good voice. You’ll do well. Wish you success. -
Hi John,
You have a nice tone, but the recordings felt a little flat, more so composition and corpse than condo. I wasn’t sure if you were going for a dead-pan type of read, which could fit, but even if you were, I was waiting for something to stand out a bit. One of the things that helps me when I am feeling flat is to picture who I am talking to.
Also, the music worked on the first and maybe the second, but felt out of place on the third. Also, there was a car honking in the back ground. If you zoom in to the recording you can try to isolate and delete it.
Cool project, good luck with it!
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Here are some rehearsals for my narration demo. No effects or corrections were done.
CENTRAL WASHINGTON AGRICULTURAL MUSEUM
Welcome to the Central Washington Agricultural Museum. The Farm EquipmenT Yard has multitudes of horse drawn implements, early mechanical farm machinery, antique tractors, and more. If there is a particular antique farming device thaT you are hoping to see, there is a good chance thaT we have iT!ARTICULATIONS
An articulation, or joint, is a point of contact between bones. Although most joints in the body allow considerable movement, some allow only limited movement or none at all. The sutures of the skull, for example, are adjacent bones that are bound together into a strong and rigid protective plate.POLAR BEARS
Winter in the arctic. This is a no-man’s land. Literally. For half the year, this vast area is locked in ice, and devoid of sunlight. Even plants can’t make it. The temperatures plummeting to minus 40 for weeks on end. This really is the toughest place to make a living.THE STOCK MARKET
The term “stock market” refers to one of the major indexes such as the Dow Jones Industrial Average or the Standard & Poor’s 500 – the S&P.
Because it’s hard to track every single company, the Dow and S&P indexes include only selected stocks, whose performance is viewed as representative of the entire market.
Note: Recorded with “indices” and not “indexes”. My coach is in a Commonwealth country.-
Hi Shmuel,
I really liked the enthusiasm and energy in the Central Washington read. As you were able to change tonalities throughout it in a natural manner. For the Polar Bears read, your voice has a very soothing and calming quality to it. I might agree with Haley, as she makes a great point. I just wouldn’t push it if that makes sense. As I personally struggle with maintaining a good balance between having both professional and natural sounding reads without “over-selling”. If that makes sense. But, that’s just my experience. I didn’t hear that at all here. Good job!
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Hi Schmuel,
Central Washington was excellent, very warm and inviting. I thought the tempo was good – same with Articulations. On Polar Bears, maybe a bit more dramatic. I was picturing this cold desolate place and thought it should be a bit more foreboding of a read. The Stock Market was great with one technical point – on the “s” in “single”, maybe hit that a little softer. I liked the stress of “single” but the “sssingle” stood out (if that makes sense!).
Great reads!
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