Feedback Forum
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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Hello! I’m new around here, but I wanted to ask for feedback on a couple of castings I recently posted for consideration. One is a radio spot for recruitment at a Sheriff’s office, where they were looking a male latino who sounded friendly but with authority. The other one is a narration in neutral Latin American Spanish accent for an NGO’s video without further instructions.
I really look forward to your feedback!
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I like these a lot. My first thought when listening to the sheriff’s spot is that it was a touch fast, but after listening to it again I don’t know if that’s right. There might just be certain sections that could benefit from a slower delivery.
I don’t speak Spanish, but I really enjoyed the Recuperacion spot. I found your voice authoritative but also comforting. I didn’t understand a word you said, but I was still pulled in for the entire spot. That has to be a good thing, right?
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I’ll keep the slower delivery in mind. It is something that I do struggle with as a Spanish speaker and I try to lean on it.
Regarding the Spanish piece: I believe that if the spot kept you in when you don’t speak the language, it is very high praise (insert Nic Cage meme here).
I appreciate the feedback! Thank you!
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Happy Tuesday! I know that you see a food trend in my scripts, LOL! So I thought I would throw in a poetic piece as well. All Feedback and critics are welcome and appreciated.
The House With Nobody in It – Poem by Joyce Kilmer
Whenever I walk to Suffering, along the Erie track
I go by a poor old farmhouse, with its shingles broken and black.
I suppose I’ve passed it a hundred times, but I always stop for a minute
And look at the house, the tragic house, the house with nobody in it.Inside everyone is an incredible cook. Someone who can cook an amazing meal any night of the week.
Farm fresh ingredients… Step by step recipes…delivered to your door for 999 a meal,
Visit Blue Apron.com/Cook to get your first two meals free.-
I’m not a huge poetry fan, but I really enjoyed The House With Nobody In It. Your voice fits that style perfectly. The only thing I noticed was that the delivery of “but I always stop for a minute” felt out of place to me. Really well done.
For Blue Apron, the timing of the last line felt off. There was a big enough pause between blueapron.com/cook and “to get your…” that it sounded to me like two different lines rather than one sentence.
I hope that helps!
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Would like feedback on this commercial for Stop and Shop that I am considering for my demo. The commercial is about “lists” and I find “lists in scripts” a bit tough. So facing my fear. All feedback is welcome and appreciated.
STOP AND SHOP TV COMMERCIAL
We’ve all got one somewhere, scribbled on the back of an envelope, shouted from the kitchen, a note to self.
But your list is also an invitation, a plan, a promise. Each one is a snapshot of what and who we care about.
So next time you’re at Stop & Shop. Take a second look at what you’ve written.
And you’ll see It’s more than just a list.
Stop and shop feed the moment.-
Kudos for facing your fears! The list sections were pretty solid. I think some subtle differences for each section helps. One thing I try to do with lists is try and have my delivery match the item in the list. So “scribbled on the back on an envelope” could be delivered a little quicker and haphazardly. “Shouted from the kitchen” with a little more energy. And “a note to self” with a little more care and purpose.
That makes sense in my brain. Hopefully, it makes sense typed out too.
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Hey everyone,
Working on my narration demo and would love to hear some honest feedback for these.
Thanks!
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I like these. The City Care spot feels like the first half of a commercial, and you did a great job establishing the problem about back pain. When it ended I felt like I was left hanging without a solution for my back pain!
Your voice and tone for the Lego spot sounded great, but there were some pronunciation and enunciation issues that could have been cleared up in another take or two.
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The Camry spot is great, really well done. And the baby backpack clip sounded a lot like all of the videos my wife and I watched when we were researching products to buy for our daughter.
The Bombas spot has one part in the middle that stood out to me. It seems to me that bombas donating a pair of socks for every one purchased is the point of the ad, but that line felt a little rushed. With “we donate one for every one you buy,” maybe try to emphasize the “you” in that line to try and connect with the listener?
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If anyone’s willing to take a listen and leave any advice, tips and/or notes I’d really appreciate it. These are two of five of the scripts i’m using for my demo, I appreciate those who are nice about notes but i’d rather get honest and productive feedback. Thank you very much!
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Dictionary piece. Enjoy how you are a bit animated in telling the story at the beginning (to your students) and then the switch to the instructional teacher tone.
Cornetz University piece. Voice is knowledgeable and friendly. Your pacing makes the instructions easy to understand. Nice natural phrasing
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These are my first two posts here. Any feedback is appreciated!
The Clinic Cares piece is from an Explainer video script that I found online, to help people book appointments online through a website. The Look Labs piece is from a project I was asked to do at work recently. It’s part of a series of explainer videos explaining an NFT project.
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Nice pacing on the Clinic Cares piece. You were clear and concise.
Look Labs was so funny!! I pictured the entire scenario. Go goat dominance!
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Hello! Here’s a Dunkin’ Donuts onboarding read. I picked up a few munchkins, for authenticities sake 🙂
Any feedback would be lovely, thank you!
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In Atlanta Bread, your listing items had their own unique delivery which made the listener tune it. Nice!
The Horror piece was my favorite. The mellow tone at the beginning drew the listener in and then as you characterized the horror words with the character inflections you set the mood of the piece. Cudos!
Personally, I am not a big cereal fan so your enthusiasm was a little over the top for me but I did believe your family loves it. Sweet!
Trendi sounded more like a read. Do you have a fashionista friend that you can share that secret with?
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I really like the About Horror clip. The beginning made me feel like I was listening to an old episode of the Twilight Zone. Well done!
For the Atlanta Bread Company, I think more can be done to help me (the listener) visualize the food and the setting. You did it with “crisp salads”. The way you said “crisp” made me think about biting into a crisp and crunchy salad. If you can do that on the other food items I think it would be a win.
I hope that makes sense!
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Here it goes, my first post on the Feedback Forum. Interested to know if it is authentic. All thoughts and tips welcome.
Me. Myself. My salad. Okay. This is it. This is the salad for me. The Grilled Chicken Caesar at McDonald’s. I am so into all the different kinds of lettuce and the cute little tomatoes. But what really shouts my name is all that warm grilled chicken. I drizzle on the low fat Newman’s Own all natural Balsamic Vinaigrette and I am one happy woman. Want to hear me go on and on about the crispy cobb or bacon ranch salad too?
I’m lovin’ it.
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Your voice is so rich and smoothe! Totally authentic sounding. It felt like you had a salad in front of you.
I loved the way you said, “low fat Newman’s Own all natural.” I just know that the rhythm of those words all strung together would have tripped me up, but you gave all of them their own unique spin.
Great job!
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