Feedback Forum
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Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!
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Hello everyone, Just got a new Narration and Commercial pieces out. Please give out feedback if there are any mistakes I’ve made.
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Sorry about the mistake that was pointed out with the two take being played at once here is the fixed one.
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Hi everyone! I tried to post yesterday but I don’t see it anywhere on here, so apologies if i double-posted this. Anyway I’m looking for feedback for narration coaching homework. Anything helps! Thanks for listening. -Chloe
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Hi Chloe,
I enjoyed your read of Emily Dickenson. Your tempo and tone were great I thought. I’m a bit of an older guy, so please take that into account with this… you’ve got a great voice, but I might be careful of too much vocal fry. Depending on your audience, it might not be well received. I really enjoyed the read.
Rusty
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You have a great voice and sounds perfect. But there is some clicking in the background and much reflection going on in the recording. There is also your tone and emotion which you can put more into. Still keep up the good work.
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thanks much for the tip! Oh yeah i hear the clicking. I forgot to add my little disclaimer of “please dont mind the bad audio it was recorded on my phone!” 🙂
wondering if y’all can pick up on the congestion in my voice, too. i’m having a rough allergy season and i’m trying my best to work through it!
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Hey guys, continuing my prep for my new narration demo. Thanks for the feedback on my last homework assignment. I appreciate feedback and constructive criticism!
Thanks! Wes
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Hey Wes,
I thought you did a really good job on the Aetna read. It sounded like you really cared about the info. The Italy read did not sound very conversational, it sounded measured. I heard a lot of myself in your technologies read. I have a proplem with over-enunciating my words and it sounded a bit like that listening to your read. Now, please understand… I’m very new here and am listening to these as I would my English students oral exams. I may be completely off mark.
Rusty
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Hi everyone! I’ve got a couple scripts here for my last session before demo prep. I’ve loved the feedback that I’ve received on past posts, and would greatly appreciate any more you all have to give.
With these scripts, my coach and I wanted to experiment with adding some small phrases to add my own flair to it. That’s why there are some phrases you’ll hear that aren’t in the verbatim script.
Church’s Chicken:
“Here’s the deal. At this time of year, you’re probably craving seafood. And if you are, you’re probably not thinking about Church’s Chicken, right? Well, think again, because Churchs has it covered. Try our Butterfly Shrimp Platter. That’s Eight tender butterfly prawns, fried until golden, your choice of TWO sides – YEAH, that’s right – TWO sides, and a honey butter cookie for only 5 dollars.”WAAAY Imaging
“… These three and many other WAAAY Better Hits coming up, right after this product information especially for you! In 60 seconds, the most requested Hit of the week!”Thanks again, everyone!
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Hello,
I really liked the Church’s Chicken read. It felt like a voice-over that could be a radio commercial. I think the pace is good and your voice is clear but it seems to lack excitement. I do like the addition of the last line as well. And maybe a little more emphasis on TWO sides.
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Hi bnielsen15,
For Churches Chicken I liked that you added some flair to the end, I think at the beginning you can come in more with a point of view. Maybe you’re talking to someone who always knows what to do, but now they don’t know what to do and you do.
I like the waay copy, I feel for this one as well you can start more as if you are in mid conversation. People could have just been saying you have played great music and you wanna share that you got more hits on the way.
Hope this helps!
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Folks, it would be so helpful if I could receive some feedback to these two uploads. How is my pacing? Does it sound conversational?
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Joel. Your readings are both technically sound. As you continue to perfect your craft, I would begin to think about how to raise the listeners level of emotional engagement. Picture yourself talking to a group of your friends about how you found your first pet at the SPCA, or your recent vacation to the Baseball Hall of Fame. I even go so far as to use their names to get a sense of a natural sounding conversation.
Also, be mindful of the background noise, like a chair creaking or banging a table. A good mic will pick that up.
Great job.
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Hey VO Gang,
So I noticed myself getting a bit uptight behind the mic. Maybe a bit of performance anxiety. So I recorded a character voice first to work out the nerves. Then did my best to make it as real and conversational as possible. Let me know what you think. All feedback is appreciated.
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Hi, Lawszvoice. I think you’re off to a good start. Great tone and diction. I used to get a little uptight behind the mic as well, especially if I knew others were in the house.
To work that out, I would wait until I was home alone and shout my lines or be as silly as I could. Once you’ve done that enough, you will become more relaxed. Either that, or the men in the white coats will come for you.
With the Olive recording, I actually thought the straight one sounded more natural.
Good job though.
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Hello,
Below I have three scripts that are similar to the copy I want to use for my demo. I am looking for feedback regarding pacing( too fast, too slow?) and overall critiques. Thank you.
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Hi,
You have a nice clear voice. Your projection could be less, just think of speaking to someone right in front of you, you wouldn’t yell at them because they’re right in front of you. Your pace is fast in study abroad, focus on where you can slow it down to showcase your voice and what you’re saying. -
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You have a nice clear almost authoritative sound to your voice. All three takes sounded more like you were reading, some of the sentences were choppy at the end like the last few words seemed to catch you off guard instead of a complete thought. Relax, have fun and tell us a story. Love the tone of your voice.
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Hi everyone,
Would love any and all feedback, especially if it seems conversational and real. Don’t think I captured the humor at the beginning of the hallmark piece, but hopefully, I captured the real by the end.
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You have a delightful tone to your voice. For the Tic-Tac recording, you might want to just give a slight more pause after you said, “…so funny” into “but the truth…” We need just a bit more time to absorb how great things were going on the date, give a slight pause and then go into the “but the truth…” maybe even in a slightly lower tone too.
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You have a really warm, relatable, friendly voice. You varied your pitch nicely, keeping things moving and interesting. I think the things that jumped out as something to look at are: 1: sibilance… heard a number of sibilant SSSS sounds. 2. The last line kind of trailed off in a wistful, soft way… maybe intentional, but I’d like to hear you end it more intentionally and try it a few different ways.
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