[David Goldberg]

Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!

• This topic was modified 4 years, 8 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 years, 5 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 months, 2 weeks ago by David Goldberg.

Topic

[DillonP]

Hello everyone, right now I am considering getting my demos made in the next month. And right now I am wanting to get prepared for what is to come. I have a Commercial and Narration piece out and would consider some feed back if possible regarding my annunciation and celerity in my speaking.

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[Wltrcurtis]

I really liked the energy and character you put into the Ancient Mysteries read. The 9-Planets recording could be slowed down and I think that would improve the pacing. Generally speaking, I think you were pretty clear in both. Hope this helped.

[brendiginette]

Hi Dillon,

The clarity of your speech and the enunciation of words was great. It was very clear and easy to understand.

I loved the personality you brought to the Ancient Mysteries piece. However, it did sound a bit read-y. Maybe sounding more conversational and less robotic would improve the read?

For the 9-Planets script, it might be improved if it sounded more engaging. Again, to my ear it sounded like you were reading it and did not sound natural.

Other than that, great work!

[Wltrcurtis]

Hi Everyone, Looking for feedback on a new narration read. Appreciate all input. Thanks in advance.

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[DillonP]

That was really good, and it was spot on and clear. From the dialogue I think it should be more upbeat. If you smile more while recording it would vastly improve and get the audience more attached. Other then that I think it was a good piece, Keep at it!

[Robertb]

Hi Lindsay,

You have good articulation and variety in your energy/tempo. That was especially on display with the piece on plastics. Really felt like you were connecting with kids as you went along. You also have the ability to treat the script like a short story with a beginning middle and end. That’s something my coach said to look for and you really have that going with that one.

The depreciation copy was good and hit home for me because I’m in need of new laptop and I felt like you were educating me on why mine has slowed down so much over time. You were balanced and appropriately “instructional” in your approach.

I liked the park piece as well, though perhaps the pacing dipped a bit midway? Only say that because your energy perked up towards to the end and I felt was a great close. Don’t mean to say that it wasn’t a good read, just that I found myself really noticing the end which was bright and gave me the feeling of setting of on a nice walk.

[Robertb]

Rusty,

Your voice reminded me of Brian Tracy, the sales and self help figure. Your voice sounds like someone who is knowledgeable about sales processes. As I listened I felt like you were speaking to a group of fellow sales professionals. I would say to continue to look for variety in your intonation. All in all, I think you are headed in the right direction.

[Robertb]

Hi everyone. I would appreciate your feedback on my practice readings. I am using my phone to record these, so just looking for any feedback on my delivery. Hope this posts. I have to admit I find the forum confusing to comment on others and post my own. But onward and upward.

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[Gill]

Robert,
I really like your Aetna read, I think you really hit the emotional aspect of it. For jiff, I would slightly increase the pace. For the real estate, would you like to buy a house sounds really exaggerated, there’s also some emphasis on words that change your delivery.

[chennianen]

I really like these reads. You’ve got a strong but also warm voice that I really like! Good job with them ^^

[Robertb]

Hi Ryan,

I hope you are able to view and listen. These are recorded on my phone so not looking for feedback on the audio but my reads. Thanks.

[rustylj63]

Hey Y’all,

I’d love some feedback on this read please…

Thanks!

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[chennianen]

I really like this read! The pacing was really nice and I could understand exactly what was being said. 🙂

[NishaG]

Nice pausing in between sentences, and the pacing was well kept throughout the read. The ending sounded slightly less conversational than the beginning, but overall it was a very good read.

[rustylj63]

Thank you!

[Lawszvoice]

Nice read. Realistic and conversational until the last two sentences. A bit too much enthusiasm for the tone set at the beginning of the read. I would try to up the pace a bit.

[chennianen]

Okay, two more scripts for today 🙂

I hope I’m not screaming in the Pizza Hut one, haha

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[gikegami]

The Pizza Hut commercial had a clear audience geared towards kids, had great energy there that would really appeal to kids.
In the Swiss Air commercial, your tone made it sound like you were really relaxed; living in that luxury suite life. Which is very good.

A good set of commercials overall that showed different variety. Fantastic!

[Lawszvoice]

The Pizza Hut energy was definitely geared to the kids in the script, but the adults pay and purchase the pizza so maybe speak to the parent then use the kid and that energy to try to drive the sale. Just a different approach. Hope that helps.

Have you flown first class – it is so radically different from coach. For giggles image you were cramped in coach for three hours and then the stewardess said you were upgraded to first class on your connecting flight it may help the listener feel the difference you are conveying. Just a thought.

[chennianen]

It has been a very very very busy last week and a half but here are two more scripts 🙂

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[Lawszvoice]

7-11 made me laugh, you punch the punch lines. Nice job. Question in the script… Was it one “three-alarm fire” … or three separate alarm fires. That made me stop when listening.

The Boys and Girls club – the first line that “piece of paper” in the hands of a child is more powerful than a gun or knife. That is incredibly visual. It is a golden ticket that can change someone’s life. I would try to bring that relevance and importance. It may help to bring a bit more seriousness to the piece.

[indexasp]

I think you’ve got a fun, energetic, and agreeable voice there. It feels like continuity, or ‘not so choppy’ is what I’d work on if i were you. Just having a smoother deliver, working out which punctuation to hit or to ignore in order have that smooth delivery flow.

THe ending “there’s got to be one right near ya”… I’d love to hear a few different ending treatments – this one didn’t seem strong, rather kind of a mental shrug was what it brought to mind. Be certain, be strong! (…is what my mental cheerleader is saying I should pass on to you)

[Gill]

Hi All,
I’m looking for critique on lifting up Client’s name, varying repeated words, and pace. No audio feedback for now. I have a little congestion please don’t be distracted by this. Thanks!

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[Lawszvoice]

Risewell had great energy and conversational like you were talking to your health-conscious friend. The pace was good for the piece.

Maybelline pace was too fast for me. I missed the luxurious and seductive feeling of the script. I would try a flirtier approach and intentionally try to draw in the listener like a good kiss. Just a different approach.

[Gill]

Thanks so much for your feedback!

[Author]

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