[David Goldberg]

Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!

• This topic was modified 4 years, 10 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 years, 7 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 7 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 7 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 7 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 7 months ago by David Goldberg.

Topic

[NuZe]

Hello all,

I want to try to get feedback for my commercial VO reads. Any advice would be great!

Attachments:

You must be logged in to view attached files.

[AJS10]

Hi! I think this is a good read for you. I would try this one as a “radio read” because of the way the script is written. I agree with what Mike said above regarding “unique” and “freshness”. But overall, I think this is a good one for you!

[mikemcgann]

Hello NuZe,

This sounded pretty good to me. The pacing for me wasn’t an issue, but it could have used more in how you hit the features of the product. “Unique” and “freshness” could have had more emotion to them to sell that uniqueness like the feeling emoted for “the way no other bag can.” Besides that, be mindful of the mouth noises and background noises.

[DillonP]

Your read is good, but too technical, by putting more pace and emotion I think it would come out better, even so keep it up.

[swy619]

Hello,
I have a couple of narration scripts here for feedback. I tried for them to be quite different from each other.
Thanks,
Sarah

Attachments:

You must be logged in to view attached files.

[AJS10]

I agree with Gill.. engaging and warm. I would suggest just a bit more energy on the OPB read. Your voice is very relaxing but with that read I’d worry it would come off a little too relaxing, so adding a little energy would help. Hope that makes sense!

[Gill]

Sarah,
Nice job on your reads, its very engaging and warm. Your pace and diction is also good. I do hear some lip smacks which is a pretty easy fix. Again, awesome job!

[anlevine95]

Hey All! here’s two samples. Thanks for taking a look. appreciate the feedback.

Attachments:

You must be logged in to view attached files.

[nicolance]

Are you recording in your home studio? I hear tons of echo and a slight distortion underneath. Not sure if you wanted any technical feedback. Lance

[swy619]

Hi,
Nice job. I think your Church’s Chicken read was especially strong. Good enthusiasm and pitch variation. I would be aware of clarity of diction a bit for the Freshii Ad, especially in the first part, through “master.” Also, maybe vary the pitch a bit more for interest on that one. Again, nice work. These certainly made me hungry.

[nicolance]

60 second recording for financial services explainer video – any feedback is very welcome, thank you – Lance

Attachments:

You must be logged in to view attached files.

[swy619]

Hi Lance,
I think this sounds very professional. You sound like an expert on the subject and like you’re really interested and confident in explaining these financial services to me. It did sound like you may have been running out of breath a bit around “CFT’s,” so perhaps be aware of that, if you felt that too. Overall, I feel like this was a great and strong read.

[nicolance]

Thanks Sarah – narration requires much more breath than commercial spots . . . thanks for the feedback – Lance

[Roman Saienni]

Hi everyone…
Here are a couple new ones I just recorded. Please give them a listen and and let me know your feedback.

Thanks,
Roman

Attachments:

You must be logged in to view attached files.

[anlevine95]

Hi Roman- you have a great voice btw. I thought you had a smooth deep voice that could be an asset to much VO work. I thought the kinder bueno read was more consistent (the depression stick seemed like the pitch increased) but it felt like with the kinder read you were selling like a truck or something. i think with kinder if you had a little pitch and maybe increased the speed it might sound better for a chocolate bar. overall i felt you were really confident and it sounded great.

[Sarania]

Hello All, if you have a chance, would love some feedback my three commercial script reads. These are harder scripts for me so any feedback would be appreciated.
Thank you!

Attachments:

You must be logged in to view attached files.

[Roman Saienni]

Hello,
First off, let me point out that you have a very nice and pleasing vocal quality. I thought the MB spot was the strongest. Overall I recommend smoothing out your delivery, all the reads came across a bit choppy and could be smoother. Keep at it and you’ll get it nailed down.

Hope this helps…
Roman

[etotheliz]

Hello all!
It was recommended during my coaching session that I upload two practice samples here for feedback.
Thanks in advance! I’ll be sure to return the favor on others’ tracks as well. 🙂

Attachments:

You must be logged in to view attached files.

[Roman Saienni]

Great job on both reads. I loved the Earhart spot. Your pacing and intonation were spot on. The Shakespeare & Co spot was good too however, you were peaking at the top of the read (specifically on the “crowd rousing… life changing” lines). Seems like you may have been to close to the mic. Overall though, I really like your vocal quality and delivery. Best of luck!

Roman

[gigihernandezdoesit]

Hi everyone! My name is Gigi, i’m very excited to be here and publishing some practice records to the forum for the first time.

I worked on these two in my last coaching session and recorded these this morning. with both i’m working on naturalism (really sounding conversational) and pacing, which my coach described as “a bit too quick”

With the Freshii copy (which I spiced up/rewrote a bit from the script library,) i was working on diction, specifically one syllable words like “to” & “and” and the dropouts on the last parts of certain words.

With the Bare Minerals copy I was focusing on list differentiation (as there are a couple lists in this copy) as well as uplifting/hitting the brand & product names in a comfortable sounding way.

How did i do?

Attachments:

You must be logged in to view attached files.

[mikemcgann]

Hello Gigi,

On the Freshii sample you could slow down as you already have plenty of energy in your voice and tone to get the same point across. It’s also easy to speed up even more when you get to phrases that you’re familiar with, so be mindful of keeping that consistency throughout. A client may also ask you to really sell the ingredients listed, so they should be hit a little to make them stand out. There were also a few audible mouth noises here and there.

Bare minimals sample: if you kept the pace you had in the first five seconds when you were asking the question before introducing the product, that would have been great to maintain. There were still some mouth noises, but it was a few aggressive plosives that stood out. Try practicing with the finger to your lips trick. I found that it not only lessens the plosive, but you’ll also learn to pout your lips less when saying words with the Ps.

As I mentioned before, You seem to have a good idea of the voice the client would want, just some minor things to work on. Good job.

[gigihernandezdoesit]

Thank you for the detailed response Mike!!

[Roman Saienni]

Hi Gigi,
I agree with the other comments. Your Freshii read was very well done and the stronger of the two. As for Bare Minerals there were some pacing issues. The read sounded like you were aware of the pacing, but were struggling a bit with it. Keep at it… You will work this out.

Roman

[gigihernandezdoesit]

thanks for the encouragement!

[etotheliz]

I love your vocal tone! Very relaxing and informative.
Bare Minerals – there were moments when it felt like you were running out of breath and the pacing dropped a bit, but it wasn’t something that completely pulled me out of what you were telling me. I also agree with Teddpr about varying the inflection of certain words.
Freshii – this was my favorite of the two. Made me hungry 🙂

[gigihernandezdoesit]

thanks! thats great and specific <3

[Teddpr]

Hi Gigi,
You have a nice sounding voice. Your diction and lack of drop outs on the Freshii copy sounded good. For the Bare Minerals copy you could improve differentiating the list of silicone, oil, paraben and fragrance by varying the inflection of the words.

[gigihernandezdoesit]

thanks for the feedback tedd!

• This reply was modified 3 years, 1 month ago by gigihernandezdoesit.

[Roman Saienni]

Good Day Everyone!
Here are a couple new reads I’ve been working on. Specific feedback is always welcome and appreciated.

Best,
Roman

Attachments:

You must be logged in to view attached files.

[etotheliz]

I agree with Joel. The Great Wolf reading was very smooth! Can’t think of any notes for it.
For Denny’s, it feels like you’re still trying to find the right pocket in terms of pacing – almost like you’re thinking about speaking at a slower pace while reading, if that makes sense? Very nitpicky note. Overall you sound great!

[Joel]

Roman, terrific read on the Great Wolf! Can’t imagine it getting any better. As for Denny’s, I thought it was very good too. I might nit-pick that some of the text could be have a tad more annunciation. Nevertheless, both recordings sounded very professional to my ear.

[Joel]

Hi everyone, my coach suggested that I try uploading some “commercial” VO examples, as I have been focusing on narration. Your feedback always welcome and helpful.

Attachments:

You must be logged in to view attached files.

[Roman Saienni]

Hey Joel…
Nice reads but I think your focus on narration is seeping into these spots. Both reads feel a bit stiff. Try relaxing more and focusing on your audience. You have a very strong authoritative voice but both these spots are calling for a relaxed fun delivery. Give it a shot.

Hope this helps…
Best
Roman

[Author]

Replies