[David Goldberg]

Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!

• This topic was modified 4 years, 4 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 years, 1 month ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 1 month ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 1 month ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 1 month ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 1 month ago by David Goldberg.

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[Brian Lakes]

Good evening everyone! I have an e-learning sample here. Couple questions for you all.
1. Does it sound conversational?
2. Is my pace good or do I sound choppy?
3. Am I cutting off any words or do any words sound goofy? 🙂

I appreciate any info or advice that you have! Thanks so much!!!

• This reply was modified 10 months ago by Brian Lakes. Reason: I uploaded the wrong file

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[Treva Dean]

Nice work! I’d say slow it down just a tad – it felt a little rushed. Good enunciation and pitch.

[Kay165]

Hi Brian, I’m totally new here so just developing my critical ear, lol. Love your voice – pitch /timbre and I thought pace sounded pretty good too, though maybe could benefit from slowing down a tad perhaps? The only little thing I could pick up on was what sounded like a period after “history”, whereas I think maybe it was the first in a list..? “…history, mission, vision and values…”
A great read though!

[Treva Dean]

Hi all! I have a second one that I could use feedback on. Again, working on my conversational tone, but any and all feedback is helpful!

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[Kay165]

Hey Treva, I liked this read and to me it sounded nicely conversational, especially “let’s get started!” at the end. I think maybe I could hear a few nerves? (Not sure!) but to be expected when we’re new to this!

[Jacqueline Figueiredo]

Hello everyone…just a little practice!

Creative feedback only please! No technical feedback please!

How is my diction? How is my pace? Do my reads sound conversational?

Please let me know…thank you!

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[Treva Dean]

Good reads! For the Chobani one, there’s a pause right after “rule” that disrupts the flow. There’s also an emphasis on the word “be”, when it seems like emphasis on “couldn’t” or “delicious” would make more sense given the text. You’re doing great!

[Treva Dean]

Hi all!

I’d love some feedback on my conversational tone. Any other feedback is also welcome! Thanks in advance!

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[Brian Lakes]

Hi Treva!
Nice read. I would slow down just a bit with the sentence that starts “Contrary” as that sounds fast and let the “Wellbeing” make it self heard. Keep up the great work!

[Kaylee Kurkierewicz]

Hi y’all! Looking for creative feedback (no technical please, just recording on my phone) on two potential copies for my commercial demo. I’d love feedback on pacing/tone variations and I’m working on making sure everything flows together and doesn’t sound choppy or too pause-y when I read. Thank you so much!

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[Terra Ashe]

Hi!
Trivago- Nice read, very fun and casual
“Alright Trivago” kinda sounded like a lead in, but I assume it’s supposed to be part of the commercial, in which case I would use lead in so you’re on from the beginning.
“and trivago my friends love to party” can be smoothed out a bit.
I think because there is so much of oooh what about this and oooh what about that in this commerical copy it would be helpful to do a few different lead ins for different parts of the script (and then just edit out the lead ins) to help with variation from the ocean views to massage to partying since they are all very different vacation options.
One other thing which is an easy fix, at one point you say “and Trivago” then goes into the parting bit but on “and” I’m not hearing the d on it, so it sounds like “in Trivago”

Indeed- Also nice read, really nice tone.
I think you can slow down those first 3 words they go by really fast. I’d just add a few extra vowels to the first word to help elongate it. I would take a slight step off how much you’re emphasizing the different words in the your mom has made it her job to find you a job bit. It’s definitely makes sense to put some emphasis, its a funny part of the script the word job is said like 3 times, but you can reel it back just a little. Lastly, I would do more of a tone shift from the first beat of the script(no job, move back home, moms in your business) to the second beat of Indeed has a solution, maybe brighter, happier, more of a smile. You state the problem, now here is the solution.

Great job! Take whatever was feedback helpful and leave the rest!

[debbyc]

Hi all. This is a narration recording. All feedback is appreciated! Thanks in advance!

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[Treva Dean]

I agree about maybe adding a smile to your read, to pep it up a little. I also think it would be good to focus on which words *need* to be emphasized. At one point you were saying you’d tell the listener to pause so they could walk to an area, and the word “walk” was emphasized. My coach has been on me about this, so that’s probably why it stood out, lol.

[Terra Ashe]

I think this was really nice! You had a lovely tone, and a really nice pace. My only thoughts were that I would slow down “Welcome to Gordan College” just a little, especially the first word but just a bit. And I would add a little more smile to your tone, just make it a little brighter. But it was really nice read I trusted you as my guide.

[Adam Cannon]

I’m looking for feedback on how my pacing sounds

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[debbyc]

I agree with Earthbul. I would like to hear you speed up the pace a bit.

[Earthbul]

Is this a piece from a documentary script ? If so I feel the pace could be a bit quicker and slightly less maudlin. I’d have to hear a little more to get a better idea.

• This reply was modified 10 months, 3 weeks ago by Earthbul.

[Mike Koziol]

Getting some practice in on some educational material. Would appreciate any and all feedback.

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[Treva Dean]

Your pacing was good! There were a couple moments where there were odd pauses, though. You paused after “the role of accounting in business” and “the economic performance”, and the pauses interrupted the flow of your words. Maybe focus on keeping the pauses as natural as possible.

[debbyc]

Hi there. Who is your audience? Practice speaking in a conversational way in educating your audience.

[m2yacademy]

Environmental Management

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[monibr16]

Hey everyone. FInishing my list for my demo. Focusing on audience, glottal stops, and clarity. All notes welcome!

Coffee mate
(Yawn) There it is, my best friend in the morning. All I need is the rich and delicious taste of coffee mate to help me be me, every morning. Coffee mate. Coffee’s perfect mate.

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[debbyc]

Nice read! the only feedback I have is to possibly put more emphasis on “rich and delicious taste”

[Earthbul]

No activity on this forum all week. Ya’ll producing or what ?

[Author]

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