[David Goldberg]

Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!

• This topic was modified 4 years, 10 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 years, 7 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 7 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 7 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 7 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 7 months ago by David Goldberg.

Topic

[Sheila Harris]

Hi all! See below for recent script submission…

GORDON COLLEGE:

Welcome to Gordon College! This tour begins just outside the tunnel that goes under College Drive near the flagpole. We will tour East campus first, followed by West Campus, and end the tour back here at the tunnel. Periodically, I will ask you to pause the recording so that you can walk to the next point or take a few minutes to independently tour the area. I will always use the word “pause” when you need to pause the recording. And I will always use the word “stop” when you need to stop walking while I continue speaking. This tour is intended to be listened to while walking around campus and does not include tours of any of the buildings. If you are taking this tour on a day when the buildings are open, please feel free to pause the recording and enter the buildings along the way. As you resume listening to the tour, remember to return to the location where you were last when you pushed pause on the recording.

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[kicking]

Hey – love the voice. Smooth, warm and a pleasure to listen to. If I had a criticism, I’d say the read was too upbeat – if that makes sense.

[mkell755]

Hi everyone! Here is a script for feedback. I’m working towards recording my narration demo. Let me know what you think. Thanks!

Mary

Mini Supermarket
This may look like the front of a vending machine. In fact, to make a purchase, all you do is dial a code and a robot sales clerk does the rest.
Instead of just sodas or crackers, this machine offers more than five hundred items – like p***y hose, shampoos, lotions, pacifiers, tooth paste, batteries – even dog food.

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[kicking]

Great voice! Good read. I would say the intonation on that last “dog food” might sound better going up rather than down.

[mkell755]

Thanks for the feedback! There were so many items in the list I had a hard time figuring out different intonations for all of them. Thanks!

Mary

[1stassi]

Hi everyone.
This is my first homework assignment to record a commercial and upload it on the forum. I would love to get some feedback from some of my fellow actors/ actresses. Thanks in advance.

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[mkell755]

Hi 1stassi! First of all, welcome! I liked your energy for this one. It sounded upbeat and appropriate for the script. I did hear some echoing in the background, but my guess is if it’s your first time you may not be fully set up yet for soundproofing. Keep it up!

Mary

[Dbryson69]

Daniella New to the VO feedback forum I uploaded 2 versions of the same copy please feel free to give me all the feedback you can

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[Bil-Bo]

Woodies
I hate Woodies! I’m the only dog on the block who doesn’t get any love, and I tell ya, I’m fed up! It’s just Woodies, Woodies, Woodies … every doggone day. She never has time for me anymore. When I want to romp in the park — “Sorry, darling. Mummy has to go to Woodies to buy a new dress.” When I want to play fetch the stick — “Not now, Canine Cutey, WOODIES is having a sale on shoes.” I thought it was supposed to be a dog’s world out there. If only I were a cat! (Meow SFX)

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[Dbryson69]

I actually could see your sad puppy dog face listen to your read maybe a little slower is the only thing I could think of if I had to critique it but good work.

[DLeeVO]

Hello All. A couple of Narration homework reads. Any feedback is appreciated!

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[Dbryson69]

hey so critiquing is a part of my homework so I will just say the american airlines sounds a little robotic toward the end
and the fish boil can slow down a bit so I have time to feel the buttery flavors I am going to be tasting when its all done and ready to eat
otherwise good read

[DLeeVO]

ok! Thanks so much!!

[Shmuel]

Hello beautiful people,

Here are couple more rehearsals for my upcoming narration demo record. Your feedback is appreciated.

GROW AN AVOCADO
Who doesn’t love fresh guacamole or creamy avocado toast? But after you’ve prepared these avocado dishes, what can you do with that big pit in the center? Why not use it to grow your own avocado tree? It’s an attractive and almost care-free houseplant, and if you live in the right climate it can produce delicious fruit that you can eat!

CHROMIUM LI-SAF LASER
Chromium-doped lithium strontium aluminum fluoride or Cr:LiSAF, is a laser media suitable for tunable applications from 780 to 1000nm. With ultra low losses and absorption strength, TeraWatt power, and femtosecond pulses, a Cr:LiSAF laser has an enormous range of uses.

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[DLeeVO]

HiShmuel. Great reads! You have a great voice for Avocado for sure! You just lost the last word “eat” a little. And nice work on the technical on Chromium; I hear a little mouth noise….happens to me too! Otherwise, good work! 🙂

[Dbryson69]

what’s to say sounds great both copies

[johntells114]

Hello everyone. So I recorded these horror narrations for my projects. I would appreciate it if you can give feedback on my performance. I recorded three different styles because I’m a little confused on how to approach narration. If there is anything I am doing wrong, feel free to point out.

(Sorry about commenting twice. I made a mistake on uploading.)

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[Shmuel]

The background sound effects are fine.
And your voice is good.
But Haley is right, the reading was a bit flat. You need to act, and I mean not “forced” acting, but acting like an actor acts. I only listened to composition, and for instance right at the beginning, you need to say the world stood still for the first time like the WHOLE WORLD man, stood still. Your Freshman year determines the rest of your High School life, and if you s***w it up, you are s*****d. And you might be s*****d. ohmygawd.
But you’ve got the technical aspects nailed, and as I said, you’ve got a good voice. You’ll do well. Wish you success.

[Haley Gross de Jimenez]

Hi John,

You have a nice tone, but the recordings felt a little flat, more so composition and corpse than condo. I wasn’t sure if you were going for a dead-pan type of read, which could fit, but even if you were, I was waiting for something to stand out a bit. One of the things that helps me when I am feeling flat is to picture who I am talking to.

Also, the music worked on the first and maybe the second, but felt out of place on the third. Also, there was a car honking in the back ground. If you zoom in to the recording you can try to isolate and delete it.

Cool project, good luck with it!

[johntells114]

Hello everyone. So I recorded these horror narrations for my projects. I would appreciate it if you can give feedback on my performance. I recorded three different styles because I’m a little confused on how to approach narration. If there is anything I am doing wrong, feel free to point out.

[Tom_Connelly]

Here’s my latest homework assignment. I’d appreciate any feedback, please and thank you.

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