[David Goldberg]

Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!

• This topic was modified 4 years, 3 months ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 4 years ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 3 days, 19 hours ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 3 days, 19 hours ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 3 days, 19 hours ago by David Goldberg.
• This topic was modified 2 days, 21 hours ago by David Goldberg.

Topic

[Bil-Bo]

AMSTEL
Hey… if life were perfect, magazines would never smell like perfume, dogs would walk themselves, and algebra would actually come in handy. Well, look on the bright side, at least there’s AMSTEL LIGHT. It has only 95 calories, but you still get real imported taste. Who says nothing’s perfect?…Amstel Light.

Duracell Quantum Batterie
SFX: Children Giggling: Then Music Under
This Duracell truck has some very special power.
It’s filled with new Duracell Quantum batteries.
These red batteries are so powerful that this year
they’ll power all the Hasbro toys donated to “Toys for Tots”.
Wanna help power some smiles?
SFX: Children Giggling: Then Music Under
Duracell. Trusted everywhere.

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[Bil-Bo]

This was not supposed to be uploaded. This very user-unfriendly site does not allow mistakes to be corrected!!!!

[smith_voice]

Greetings- My latest commercial homework for Art. Any feedback is greatly appreciated!

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[Erik B]

Hi Mr. Smith,

I checked out your reads, and wanted to provide my feedback.

Human Society – Good tone and good pacing. I noticed upspeak at the end of the first and second sentence, watch out for that. Also maybe add a bit of differentiation b/w abandoned, some sick or injured.

Machine Learning – good tone and good pacing, but it sounded slighly robotic. Also watch out for the glottal between “nature and”.

Zellers – good differentiation b/w men, kid’s and ladies. But the read could have used a little more pep. Imagine if Crazy Eddie did this read. You don’t have to be that over the top, but just give the read a bit more excitement.

Overall good job.

[salmaperez001]

Hello, hope everyone had wonderful holidays! I have attached my Commercial recordings below! I would greatly appreciate any and all feedback. Thank you!

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[Andres]

Just looking for any feedback that you might think is helpful, trying to practice for my Narration Demo so I appreciate whatever advice you may have.

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[Erik B]

Hi Andres,

I listened to your read, and I thought it was good. The tone and pacing of the read are solid. Also you differentiate between sentences nicely. The only suggestion I have is slowing down, “hello and welcome”. Also may I suggest next time you post on the forum, include the copy of the read. It allows listeners to better analyze your performance, and provide more helpful feedback.

[edward]

HP LASERJET PRO P1102W WIRELESS SETUP
HP LaserJet Pro P1102w Wireless Setup consists of Auto Wireless Connect generation that allows connecting the printer to the wi-fi network routinely without having to attach any cables or input wireless network settings which include wireless password or identity. All new HP printers may have this functionality for the duration of the software program set up process.

[Mark.OD]

I would love to get some feedback on these pieces. Just started the narration track and am working to find that authentic voice while considering varying audiences.
(Also, it’s my first upload and I hope I did this correctly. Any help is appreciated)
Thanks.

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[LSlagle519]

Here are a few more reads I worked on last week. The scripts are from the Harvey Home Theatre and Motel 6 scripts in the library.

Harvey Home Theatre
He has a 160 IQ, performs cardiac surgery for a living. And now, he can even operate his home entertainment system. Introducing Harvey Home Theater. It’s so sophisticated, it’s simple. Dimensions of sight and sound unheard of, until now. All at your fingertips. Now, if he could only operate the microwave. Home Theater from Harvey, not your ordinary electronics store. Call for the Harvey near you.

Motel 6 Do Over
I’ve just been hearing about this trendy new hairstyle called a man bun. I mean what’s next the hee hive? well Motel 6 recently got a new updo of sorts too with renovations nationwide and even with our fresh modern look you’ll still find rooms at the lowest price of any national chain so you can save up enough money to get yourself a haircut or maybe a hat.
We’ll leave the light on for you, at Motel6.com

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[Mark.OD]

I thought the first one was excellent in it’s authenticity. The pace was quite effective as well. I thought the second was not quite as authentic, it was a little “acty”, if I may coin that word. Your voice is perfect for both pieces and the sound quality rocks.

[Logan DFD]

So, I’m REALLY struggling to hammer out my “natural” delivery, and I’ve been running around in circles. Any help or feedback would be VERY appreciated. Thanks!

Atlanta Bread Company

When you think of Atlanta Bread Company, don’t just think ‘bread’.
Think of an entire breakfast menu – fresh-baked pastries, hot breakfast sandwiches and specialty coffees.
Think of our Cafe with savory sandwiches, daily soups and crisp salads.
And don’t forget…we can cater your next special event or meeting!
Atlanta Bread Company – more than just bread.

Special K Red Berries

Putting strawberries in cereal wasn’t our idea.
Putting them in the box was.
With slices of real strawberries and crunchy sweet flakes, looking good never tasted so good.
Special K Red Berries.

A1 Steak Sauce

With steak, you want to make every bite count.
That’s why we use A-1 Steak Sauce.
A-1 brings out every single bite of steak, or even hamburger.
Mmmmm, delicious.
For me, there’s only one steak sauce, A-1.
Because A-1 has all the taste that makes every bite count.

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[Sylvanie]

Hi Logan, maybe try to uplift the read a little. I agree on adding a smile or laugh, will make a difference. Good Luck!

[Mark.OD]

All three are filled with taste sensory images. Use those. Bring up those flavors in your mind. Maybe a close friend who likes food could be your intended audience. Hope this helps.

[carynbell]

Hi there!

Try laughing before the reads and smile throughout and see if that helps.

[carynbell]

Hi Everybody!

I’m now training on commercial reads.

Feedback is always appreciated!!!

Thanks!

FRANKLIN DISABILITY

YOU GROW UP LOOKING TO YOUR PARENTS AS YOUR PROVIDERS AND PROTECTORS. THEN ONE DAY, SOMETIMES QUITE SUDDENLY, THE SHOE’S ON THE OTHER FOOT. AS YOU YOURSELF GROW OLDER, HOW CAN YOU BE ASSURED THAT YOU WON’T BE FORCED TO DEPEND ON YOUR OWN CHILDREN FOR YOUR CARE AND SECURITY? IT’S SIMPLE. WE’RE THE FRANKLIN DISABILITY INSURANCE COMPANY. WE’RE CONTINUALLY LOOKING TOWARD THE FUTURE, SO YOU’LL BE PREPARED WHEN IT GETS HERE. FOR MORE INFORMATION, CONTACT YOUR BROKER. HERE’S TO A LONG LIFE.

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[carynbell]

OPEN TO FEEDBACK GUYS! THANKS!

AT ALMOND BREEZE, WE ONLY USE CALIFORNIA GROWN BLUE DIAMOND ALMONDS IN OUR ALMOND MILK. AND WE’RE PROUD OF THAT. BUT THE WHOLE CARING AND NURTURING PART? THAT IDEA WE BORROWED FROM NATURE. BLUE DIAMOND ALMOND BREEZE, THE BEST ALMONDS MAKE THE BEST ALMOND MILK.

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[Mark.OD]

Very nice job. The pacing is excellent and the delivery quite natural. The only criticism is with the word disability, which was a little awkward. I only mention this because its the title of the company. Other than that, great job.

[Author]

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