Feedback Forum

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    Topic
  • #15468
    David Goldberg
    Edge Studio Staff

    Hi! Upload your recordings, and get feedback from your peers!

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  • #74323
    Mike Reddy
    Participant

    And the scripts to go along with my reads below…

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  • #74318
    Mike Reddy
    Participant

    Greetings everyone!

    Got a few files ready to be critiqued. I look forward to your thoughts.

    Thanks!

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    • #74359
      TomFields
      Participant

      Pmuller,
      You seem to have some ambient sound like a hiss or a low buzz. If you can’t locate the source you can take it out with the noise reduction function in your software. Better to eliminate the sound up front if possible. I ran your file through Audacity and did a noise reduction and manually silenced a couple of spots. Play it and see the difference. Keep on truckin.
      Tom

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  • #74282
    1stassi
    Participant

    Hi guys I did a Disney script. Let me know how I sounded please. I have my demo record soon.

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    • #74391
      Ems412
      Participant

      Hello,

      I like the pace and the annunciation, but because this is Disney I would say maybe add some more excitement or maybe pitch upwards especially the first sentence.”The magic is calling you, to stay at Disney resort hotel! “

  • #74275
    Bil-Bo
    Participant

    THE TRAVELERS INSURANCE COMPANY
    We all share the same goals in business and in life. Security … protection … trust. What every man, woman, and child seeks from birth. What we at The Travelers have been dedicated to providing for 130 years. A difference backed by over $100 billion in assets, and the knowledge that every customer under America‘s umbrella is our most important one. The Travelers Insurance Company.

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  • #74266
    maxspitz
    Participant

    Hey Yall,

    Hope everyone’s week is going well! I’m posting some narration spots for my next HW. The two are pretty varied in pitch and tone so any feedback on the performance/quality of either or both would be much much appreciated.

    Thanks for listening!
    Max

    9 Planets:
    About 12 billion years ago, scientists think, from a singular explosion, the universe was born. In those first moments, intensely hot hydrogen and helium raced outward – thinning, cooling, and clumping into vast, organized structures.

    Kids Activity TV:
    Every day is an adventure with Activity TV. It’s the place to be for hundreds of Awesome activities in dozens of categories! Cartooning to magic to cooking and more – ready for you day or night. This month learn some gross-out magic. Watch closely as Ryan teaches you to perform the severed finger trick!

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    • #74289
      Roman Saienni
      Participant

      Hey Max,
      I really liked both reads. Especially the narration, your voice really lends itself to that style, in this case at least. You demonstrated good versatility with the two very different styles and both sounded great. My main observation is that both reads could flow a bit better. Both felt slightly stilted with pauses between phrases. Other than that, I’d say great job.

      Roman

      • #74295
        maxspitz
        Participant

        Roman,

        Gotcha, thanks so much for your feedback! I’ll be sure to look out for/work on that in the future.

        Max

  • #74263
    Roman Saienni
    Participant

    Hi everyone,
    This is my first post to the Feedback Forum.
    I used these two reads in my first coaching session and would really appreciate your feedback.

    Thanks!

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    • #74269
      maxspitz
      Participant

      Hey Roman!

      I wanna start off by saying I think you have an excellent vocal quality and sound, both really fit the spots you selected very well!

      I’d say you could do a bit of work on pacing for both, but especially for the Home Depot. Mostly tightening the gaps a bit in between phrases and editing out breaths. I think you could also up the energy level and tone on the Ford one JUST A BIT to make it a bit more impactful. Other than that, I think you did an awesome job and they both really do sound great!

      Hope this is helpful!
      Max

      • #74288
        Roman Saienni
        Participant

        Thanks so much Max! I truly appreciate your comments.
        I agree on your pacing observation, something I’m working on.

        Best,
        Roman

  • #74248
    Garprocks
    Participant

    Happy Wednesday VO Fam! Just practicing and would appreciate some feedback, on performance and sound levels etc. Have a great day and THANKS!

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  • #74235
    Logan DFD
    Participant

    Just hoping to get some general feedback on some scripts I read. Feedback regarding (but not limited to) natural delivery would help. Thanks!

    HelloFresh

    Choose dinner that comes with less and gives you more.
    Less kitchen chaos and more five star recipes that are easy to make and love.
    Less shopping and more pre-portioned ingredients delivered to your door.
    Less stress, less mess.
    Umm. No promises on the less mess thing, but definitely less what’s for dinner blues.
    And who doesn’t love that?
    So gather round.
    Because this dinner that comes with so much less really gives you so much more.
    Join America’s #1 mealkit at Hellofresh.com.
    Get $80 off plus free shipping with code TV80 during our labor day flash sale.

    Earthbound Farm

    
Here at Earthbound Farm, we don’t use any harmful chemical pesticides.
    All of our organic salads, fruits and vegetables are grown in harmony with nature.
    And while farming organically may cost more, we think you’ll find Earthbound Farm organic produce is an infinitely better value.
    Because with each crisp, delicious bite, you can take comfort in knowing you’re protecting your family’s health. Now and for years to come.
    Earthbound Farm.
    Food to live by.

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    • #74253
      Garprocks
      Participant

      Random thoughts on making it sound more natural:

      More casual on “choose dinner”; no break between “more” and “pre-portioned”; When saying “delivered to your door”, be thinking “Cool!”; I would have a higher pitch on “less mess” than on “less stress” – will provide more contrast to “no promises”…
      “And who doesn’t love that” all runs together; Change your emphasis from “PLUS” to “free shipping” at end. Hope something here is helpful!

      • #74258
        Logan DFD
        Participant

        Thanks! I’ll be sure to try it!

  • #74193
    lmzawarski
    Participant

    First attempt at figuring out my home studio, first attempt at audacity, first time figuring out how to upload before a coaching… Did not go well. Sorry, Art!

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    • #74252
      Garprocks
      Participant

      Hi Laura! Very pleasing voice and good enunciation. Just listen to yourself and try to smooth out your read; right now, it sounds like you’re reading. Good job!

  • #74187
    Sarania
    Participant

    Hello All!
    I would love your feedback on my commercial training homework. I’m trying to work on different characterizations and tones depending on the commercial. Any feedback would be amazingly helpful and appreciated.

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    • #74431
      ecbrown220
      Participant

      All great reads.
      The Old Navy and Sesame Place reads were lively. I was anticipating a melody behind your words. I actually envisioned watching a commercial while listening.

      The Snapple read was good also but I was expecting a little more liveliness in your tone.

      Continue the great work!

    • #74238
      chloeblackstone
      Participant

      Hi Sarania! I love your voice, very energetic. For old navy, I noticed a pattern of each sentence ending in a sort of down tone. I would recommend varying the end of each sentence , so some sentences end go up and down. I think this would help keep listeners attention.

      For Sesame Place, I noticed that the word “Sesame” repeats a few times. I would recommend vary your tone for each “Sesame.”

      Lastly, for Snapple. I hear that you are doing a sort of grocery store loud-speaker character. It’s a very cute piece of copy and well suited for your voice. My tip, I would try really visualizing who this character is and who this character is speaking to. Maybe picture yourself speaking into the phone from behind the counter at a store. This should help bring this to life a bit more.

      Overall very nice reads, I think your voice is great for this copy!

      • #74254
        Garprocks
        Participant

        Hello Sarania – what a bright voice you have! On Old Navy, when you say “percent off”, it sounds like “percen toff”. Listen to yourself saying it with a soft “d” sound or dropping the “t” altogether and see what you think.

        On Sesame Places, I agree with Chloe’s suggestion for varying “Sesame”, but otherwise think its great – your voice is PERFECT for that spot!

        I understand what you are shooting for in Snapple, but it sounds very mechanical – sometimes almost forced. I think Chloe’s suggestion is excellent that you visualize speaking into the phone at the back.

        Great job!

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