[aylinsings]

Hello!

Great job on these!

With the first one, I enjoyed the pacing. I do think you can go even deeper into the emotion. For example the words “please, please!” I didn’t necessarily believe you were actually begging. But the read is totally in the right direction.

For the second, I think you can speed up the pacing just slightly. Watch the micro pauses between “dogs” and “would walk themselves” and “algebra” and “would really come in handy.” Aside from that, I think it is a solid read!

Cheers