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#64038
tomnunestomnunes
Participant

Hi, Ed. You have a nice, distinctive voice. It is a folksy, friendly sound that makes me feel like everything is going to be alright. I think you could leverage that more with these reads. It’s not yet clear to me what you want me as the listener to do or think. For instance, each item listed after “Baltimore” felt the same and I couldn’t tell how you felt about each of them. I think if you connect more with that, and feed it with that voice of calm and reason, these will be stellar. Note on #2) there is a pause between “when everyone has access” and “to the best financial tools” which is really a single phrase. It felt like a catch breath, so see if you can give yourself a bigger breath beforehand.