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Hi Svenbot, thanks for the feedback! That is really weird, I did not catch that I totally smushed the first “of” I will watch the tone variation as well. I was focused on not adding unnecessary pauses where there are no commas, which has been hard, but seems like it should simple. I like the idea of telling a story with a beginning, middle and an end, that really makes sense in making it seem believable, I will work on that too. Thanks for the tips!