RYoung
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I submitted this one sometime back on a pay-to-play site, not sure what happened to it but any comments are appreciated.
Hi I like this one a lot I think it captured some realistic sort of conversation. I would just go to that the words better in the beginning and brewed sounded off however minor that may be. Nice work on this one
“This is a simulated audition for a Washington Mutual radio spot”. Was the instructions for Novembers audition contest. However in the reviews they call it a TV commercial? Which makes the delivery much different, he even says it- (Also, this is a TV commercial. If it had been a radio commercial, with no visual of Jen, the pause could make the cold-open syllables “For Jen” meaningless and confusing . Geez!
I concur on multiple takes, sometimes I do 4 or 5, probably better to just read over the script multiple time to become familiar. That said I’ve enjoyed your reads for a while and think you have improved tremendously! Only two minor things inflection wise are Holiday treats ended with a question instead of statement and Hershey Park the last word happy fell off a bit, good work, enjoyed the descriptive tone on the holiday rides!
Hi Mary, Your voice seems pleasant, however too many upward inflections for this script, now if it was a children’s commercial or story it fits with your tone. This script seems to want more passion and inspiration, hope that helps!
Hi Tim, I submitted a reply to your read but seem to got lost somewhere. Basically I think you started off well but the last word in the list or phrase which was play movies seem to fizzle out. Then I think you could smile more at the end because of the fact that they were wrong is the turning point in the script after listing what an SUV could never be, I would just turn up the enthusiasm a bit on the last line otherwise good work on this and good luck on your demo!
Thanks for listening and any comments are much appreciated!
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