nettipo1
Forum Replies Created
-
Replies
-
Hi Don,
Your manly voice is wonderful for these kinds of spots – but I think you probably knew that! 🙂 Both spots had great energy, and I would suggest slowing down the pace in certain parts, so that words you emphasize aren’t rushed or blended together. For Royal Purple Max, make sure to clarify the product name a teensy bit more so that “Max” doesn’t blend in with the word right after it “atomizer.” Try not to rush through the next few words, “high-performance,” “high-concentrated.” Since this copy has so many descriptive words, you may want to be more selective of which words you actually emphasize so that they stand out more. Make sure the tag line doesn’t get mixed into the list of benefits mentioned before it, by changing how you say the start of that sentence as well as removing the pause in the middle of it.Hi Bill, I also liked your tone and delivery. It’s very good already, but my main observation is that it could be even more conversational, starting with the first sentence. Since it’s a significant question, one that will require the listener to self-reflect, you may want to deliver this script with more “directness,” certainty, and intimacy, to an individual listener. Right now it kind of feels like it’s being spoken to a general audience. Perhaps think of yourself as the person’s inner conscience, and see if that changes the emotional quality of your read. You’re already at a good level, so this is just a minor adjustment.
Hello! Thanks for your feedback!
McDonald’s Salads
Me. Myself. My salad. Okay. This is it. This is the salad for me. The Grilled Chicken Caesar at McDonald’s. I am so into all the different kinds of lettuce and the cute little tomatoes. But what really shouts my name is all that warm grilled chicken. I drizzle on the low fat Newman’s Own all natural Balsamic Vinaigrette and I am one happy woman. Want to hear me go on and on about the crispy cobb or bacon ranch salad too? I’m lovin’ it.Hi rogue1, I think it’s interesting what you did with the two different takes. I think the disaffected version could have been a little bit quicker, as monotone and flat doesn’t need to be slower. It did sound Millennial-esque to me–sounds like people I know, sadly…I think it’s definitely worth adding that type of read into your VO arsenal. In the Upbeat version, I think it’s interesting how you emphasized the key words. You seemed to employ the same kind of “slow and cool” style of emphasis on “freaky-fast” and “freaky-fresh” and then “five minutes” and “no further.” Perhaps you could try emphasizing with a different emotion behind it and see if that helps it from slowing down too much. Good job.
Hello!
I enjoyed all three reads. I think you do show a knack for character voicing. They were all fairly distinctive from one another. I think the Edgar Allen Poe read was the least like a character to me; it seemed like the character was trying to tell the story in a haunting way, so I wasn’t sure if the character himself was a haunting person or ghost. You seem the most natural and most conversational in the Handsome Jack read. Good stuff – keep going!Hello,
I think your voice is very good for this type of script and the “bold and deep voice they’re looking for! Your read is clear, too. But I think the energy and the pace need to be brought up more and kept consistent throughout the read. Nice job overall!Hi Troy,
I think the pacing is nice but could be slowed down even more. I also noticed that you’re emphasizing more than just the key words, and you place really strong emphasis on them. For instance, in the last sentence of the Mic Environment script, you’re emphasizing “has” and “sound” – you might want to consider if other words in that sentence are more important and should be emphasized instead. Maybe try lengthening words as an alternative to emphasizing them, which might then have the added benefit of slowing down the pace. I do like your energy and liveliness of your voice in both.Hi Evette, you have a sweet and comforting voice, so you come across as a friendly, down-to-earth AAA representative! You need to bring up the volume of your audio recording. You might want to pronounce the “a” in front of “a friend’s” and “a learner’s permit” as not a hard “a” but more like an “ah”–sorry, I don’t know the correct terminology to describe this, but I hope you understand what I’m getting at. You might want to vary how you emphasize the words to make it sound more conversational. Good job, and I look forward to hearing more!
Hi Jay,
You did a good job slowing down your pace in both recordings. I noticed a slight increase in pace in Advantage Technology on the last sentence with the list, starting at “company policies”–but other than that, I think the pace was working for me as a listener. You might want to slow it down even more for the Bob Ross bio, to match his calm nature. You convey good personality and have very clear delivery in both recordings.
