[tomnunes]

Boom! Love your voice! Made me sit up and pay attention. Liked the playfulness with the kids line. Keep exploring that more. Couple of items. Numbers in scripts are importance, so emphasize sixteen. Emphasize does not necessarily mean punch. It means find a reason and a way to make ‘sixteen’ an important point. “Before” does not feel like the right word to emphasize in the last line. Try ways to make this feel like a more urgent call to action. Digging the overall energy. Stay safe, stay warm.

• This reply was modified 4 years, 3 months ago by tomnunes.