Please find attached my recent commercial recordings for homework. Any feedback you provide is greatly appreciated.
Advil
Muscle aches? Nothing is proven more effective or longer lasting than Advil. For long-lasting relief of muscle aches, count on Advil. In a recent clinical study, Advil was found to work better than Tylenol in relieving the pain of sore muscles the day after exercise. No wonder doctors recommend Advil for muscle aches more than any other non-prescription brand. ADVIL — Advanced medicine for pain.
Waterpik
If you floss you know what a two-handed tug of war feels like. Which is why we at Waterpik are introducing the Flosser. At a speed of 10,000 gentle strokes per minute, its nylon tip effectively removes plaque above and below the gumline. Making it a fast, easy and more convenient way to keep gums their healthiest, and teeth their cleanest. With no strings attached.
All three of these were very good reads!I actually thought a commercial pop’d up on my computer until I realized it was actually you.
Tone, clarity and pitch were all great the only thing I would have you pay attention to is your speed. The JCPenny and Carnation reads seemed a little rushed, and I had to really focus to comprehend what you were saying. Other than that. Great Job!
Thanks for posting…Overall, I think you did a good job getting through the script. You have a youthfulness to your voice that was very pleasant to hear.
I would suggest going through and making sure you remain conversational throughout…There we a couple of times where it was a bit choppy but it might just mean being comfortable with the script.
I would also say work on trying to get the listeners to envision what you’re talking about… Tell a story as if there is nothing there for us to see but the words that you’re saying.
This is my latest homework assignment. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated.
SWK
Atlanta Bread Company
When you think of Atlanta Bread Company, don’t just think ‘bread’. Think of an entire breakfast menu – fresh-baked pastries, hot breakfast sandwiches and specialty coffees. Think of our Cafe with savory sandwiches, daily soups and crisp salads. And don’t forget…we can cater your next special event or meeting! Atlanta Bread Company – more than just bread.
History Channel
If you lived before our time, who would you be?
Would you fight your brother for the rights of another? Who would you be?
Would you find new dreams or create wonders?
What if you could choose from a 1,000 yesterdays; a 1,000 lives, when the past was today and the new took your breath away.
Who would you be? What would you feel? How would you live? Who would you love?
Here are my second takes on the two commercial I submitted previously for homework. I tried to take the advice given. Please offer feedback where you see fit.
Thanks,
SWK
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Invisalign
Your smile says you’re happy, confident. But, if you’re uncomfortable with your teeth, your smile could be saying just the opposite. Fortunately, there’s Invisalign. The clear alternative to braces that’s comfortable and removable for eating and brushing. Straighten your teeth little by little until a new smile emerges. Join the millions at Invisalign.com and arrange a free, no obligation consultation with an experienced Invisalign provider and let the world see the real you. Invisalign. Learn how to smile again.
1-800-Collect
Still dialing zero to call people collect? Stop! It’s expensive. Instead, dial 1-800-COLLECT. Dialing 1-800-COLLECT instead of zero, saves the people you call up to 44%. Just dial 1-800-COLLECT, follow the simple instructions, and your call will go through in seconds. Calling home? Save yourself money! 1-800-COLLECT. Dial it today.
Posting my homework assignment. Please review the two recording and provide feedback as you see fit!
Invisalign
Your smile says you’re happy, confident. But, if you’re uncomfortable with your teeth, your smile could be saying just the opposite. Fortunately, there’s Invisalign. The clear alternative to braces that’s comfortable and removable for eating and brushing. Straighten your teeth little by little until a new smile emerges. Join the millions at Invisalign.com and arrange a free, no obligation consultation with an experienced Invisalign provider and let the world see the real you. Invisalign. Learn how to smile again.
1-800-Collect
Still dialing zero to call people collect? Stop! It’s expensive. Instead, dial 1-800-COLLECT. Dialing 1-800-COLLECT instead of zero, saves the people you call up to 44%. Just dial 1-800-COLLECT, follow the simple instructions, and your call will go through in seconds. Calling home? Save yourself money! 1-800-COLLECT. Dial it today.