Trying out some characters reads with the last one “tollbooth” specifically being a try at some audiobook copy. All done with voice memo on my phone, so not currently looking for technical feedback, but any and all comments/critiques as far as tone, emotion, pacing, diction, etc welcomed!
These are great choices for your voice profile. Your diction is very good and doesn’t sound overly stilted. I’d suggest for Gillette finding some variety in your phrasing and ways to connect phrases. Paraphrased example: “3 mounted blades to adjust for every curve, PLUS….AND a strip of aloe.” This is a list and should be phrased as commas rather than periods. Currently they are three separate statements with all the same weight and tone. These are the selling points of the ad so find what’s indivually interesting about each feature but string them together since they’re all talking about one product. Your tag “Gillette the best a man can get” is very strong.
Your opening list in Vanguard has a lot of nice variation and suits the tone of the product very well (sincere, reliable, authoritative). Just to play with the read, maybe see how it feels for that opening list to read like commas rather than periods. I don’t mean to use up talk necessarily, but let your tone indicate there is more to come with the first two and give that period in your voice for the third.
Great energy to your read and enthusiasm for the product. Two things I’d suggest looking out for. First is trying to neutralize your accent (New England? I especially hear it in “hardwood”) but definitely a great thing to keep in your back pocket for ads that want that relatable regionalism (I have to WORK to keep my southern accent from sneaking in). Secondly, be careful with consonant blends at the end of words like “lift.” They need to be more crisp just for clarify of the script.
Hi there
I’m having trouble opening both of your submissions. I tried on my computer and my phone. It shows as having a length of time but is silent. Very well could be my devices (both Apple) but wanted to alert you in case others are having difficulty too and is robbing you of feedback 🙂
Gathering some more feedback leading up to a coaching session so any insights are appreciated! Still not in need of technical feedback because just recording on Voice Memo on my phone (don’t you worry my tech savvy friends, that day will come 😀 )
It sounded like you did what I do which is start at my regular talking speed, then remember I should slow down. Your energy is great. I think slowing down would help with the small diction issues and let you find more flow between the phrases.
A PSA and an ad for your feedback. Not looking for technical feedback. All other feedback welcome! Diction, conversational tone, glottal stops, pacing; hit me with it!
These reads are lovely. Your voice is extremely pleasant, you have great energy, and seem to be interested in what you are saying.
It is a little disjointed between sentences. When you’re marking up your script, find ways to connect connect statements, especially ones that are related. Noticeable example: “…more often. In more places. With less mess.” Treat this like a list rather than 3 separate thoughts.
Another example, “Get the coverage you need. For a price you can afford.” There is too much space between these statements.
Diction is something I’m working on to so don’t feel I can give great feedback here, but I did notice “costs”, the sts sound is getting lost.
I really like the baby bath read. The smile in your voice comes through, and you sound interested in what you’re talking about.
The Danables read sounds a bit forced. You linger on the first vowel of words. Wish I had more clear feedback. Lol the variation in your tone and energy is great. Take another crack at it to find the natural flow like you’ve done more closely with the second read. 🙂