kbridges
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Hello fellow voices! I’m really appreciating this forum and the positive, constructive feedback. Thank you all for participating! Here’s another one of my reads. I’m hoping to be really fun and engaging in narration for younger audiences. Any tips?
Script:
Why is food important? Well, it tastes good, and it’s fun to eat, but it also gives us energy! That means it helps our bodies move and work, so we can grow, play, dance, run, study, and think.Our bodies work kind of like a car. If you don’t put good fuel into the car, it won’t be able to drive. But, when you put the right fuel in, VROOM! Off it goes!
Hi Dante!
Here’s my feedback:
Documentary: You sound epic. Great job! My coach has been working with me on transitions, and I think it may help vary the copy if you picture different transitions when you talk about different things. When shifting from a global perspective to the cosmic perspective, for example. I also think you could move through the list of global environments a bit more fluidly. Lastly, just make sure you say “men and women” not “woman”. I think its very clear and overall good 🙂
Freshii: Great energy! I’d just differentiate the two bowls more, since they have such different flavors. Picture how they’d taste and look different 🙂
Ziploc: Really I think this is spot on. Great energy flow. Each sentence has its own vibe, and it ends really strong. Nice!
Hello again! I’d appreciate some feedback on this paragliding script.
“Working towards your first pilot rating will be an exciting (and memorable) part of your journey into free flight. Everything is new and even the smallest flights will be immense accomplishments. If you’re listening to this, you’ve probably dreamed the dream and are ready to get started.
After choosing an instructor/school you would like to learn from, talk with your instructor to see when is the best time and day to begin your adventures into free-flight. The most important items you’ll need to bring are sturdy ankle supporting boots that you can also run in, and water. Whether you choose to fly a hang glider or a paraglider you’ll begin with learning vocabulary important for the training and flying process. This new vocabulary will help you and your instructor over the coming weeks, months, and years. Your first days, depending on weather, are usually focused on ground handling the glider.”
Hello! I’m looking for feedback on this practice take. I’m aiming for a young audience, e learning style.
“These words have something in common. Can’t, won’t, don’t….. They are contraction words! In today’s lesson we will learn about contractions and work with a few examples.
What Is a Contraction?
Imagine blowing up a balloon and watching it expand. It gets bigger and bigger. Now if we let the air out, it shrinks, or contracts. To contract means to get smaller.
In writing, you can use a contraction to combine two words together and make a shorter word. In other words, the contraction shrinks the two words. So a contraction is just a word that’s a shortened form of two words put together.
For example, when the words can and not are put together, the contraction word can’t is formed. The apostrophe is the small punctuation mark that takes the place of the letters we’ve removed. In the case of can’t, the apostrophe replaces the ‘n’ and the ‘o’ of not.”
