JohnFinn
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Hi Bill- Thanks for your feedback, I can hear it that way as well. I did silence and cut those areas, could it also be that the timing was cut too short?
Hi Kevin- between 26-29 seconds “field inspecting the size,” maybe a bit of exhausted breathe? Sounds good for a narrative work!
Edit for correct script:
By mid-1940, the German Army had conquered all of western Europe and H****r began to tighten the noose around Britain. In the Atlantic, German U-boats were decimating Allied convoys, threatening to cut off Britain’s only lifeline. But Churchill had an unusual secret weapon: crossword fanatics, chess champions, mathematicians, students and professors, Americans and British. They were recruited with one common aim: to unlock the secrets of Enigma, a machine that concealed Germany’s war plans in a seemingly unbreakable code. If Enigma could be penetrated, everything H****r plotted could be known in advance. At Bletchley Park, there unfolded one of the most astonishing exploits of the Second World War.
Trying a read for children, let me know what you think. Thanks in advance!
Children’s Educational Space Game:
Today we’re going to explore all of the planets in our solar system and some other places as well. We’ll travel into the future when astronauts live throughout the solar system. On each world we’ll see what the weather is like, what we would wear, and what we would do to have fun! Grab your oxygen, put on your seatbelt, and let’s blast off!Another submission, looking for feedback on pace and tone. Thank you in advance!
Decoding N**i Secrets
By mid-1940, the German Army had conquered all of western Europe. H****r was tightening the noose around Britain. In the Atlantic, German U-boats were decimating Allied convoys, threatening to cut off Britain’s only lifeline. But Churchill had a secret weapon, the strangest military establishment in the world. Crossword fanatics, chess champions, mathematicians, students and professors, Americans and British, all came here with one common aim: to unlock the secrets of the Enigma, a machine that concealed Germany’s war plans in seemingly unbreakable code. If Enigma could be penetrated, everything H****r plotted would be known in advance. At Bletchley Park, there unfolded one of the most astonishing exploits of the Second World War.Hello, hope everyone is well! Looking for feedback on my pace and tone as well as the style of read for this script. Thanks in advance!
Cosmos
Welcome to the planet earth. A place of blue nitrogen skies, oceans of liquid water, cool forests, soft meadows; A world positively rippling with life. From the cosmic perspective, it is, for the moment, unique. The only world on which we know with certainty that the matter of the cosmos has become alive, and aware. There must be many such worlds scattered through space, but our search for them begins here, with the accumulated wisdom of the men and women of our species, acquired at great cost, over a million years.That tone and pace- sounds great for a relaxing session of yoga. Maybe too much pause in “table top…position” around 41 seconds, but overall a wonderful read!
John
Hello everyone! Just a practice training script, any and all feedback is appreciated. Thanks!
Sadly, too many times people with back and neck pain get a prescription of disability when they go to the doctor. “Don’t play tennis. Don’t play golf. Don’t go fishing.” While a day of rest may be okay right after an injury, the best therapy for back pain is movement. In fact, too much rest can make muscles and tendons less flexible – and more prone to future recurrent strain and back pain. Fact: You need a 20 minute walk to counter the effects of three hours of lying down. How would you know this? You’d learn that and more by reading our free 16-page Back to Life Journal. The Journal provides tips for those with back pain on how to get back to tennis, back to golf, or back to biking. Download your copy of the Back to Life Journal at NorthJerseySpineGroup.com.
